The Narcissist Borderline Does NOT Have Friends, Here's Why!

DeMars Coaching
6 followers
11 Video Views·Dec 28, 2024
hi everyone today I'm going to talk
about
friends I'm going to talk about toxic
people and why they don't have
any it's sad it is
um their mental illness their behaviors
means they know no relationships are
functional whether they last long or not
I don't
know but we seek Comfort humans seek
comfort more than anything not happiness
like you many of you think just Comfort
that's it right I just want peace right
I just want to be comfortable
relationships offer the biggest source
of that
comfort so they're never comfortable
it's sad and they don't know that they
don't know why they think they have
friends but they don't they don't get it
they don't realize it they don't
know um now not all right I'm sure
there's going to be some people that are
narcissist or Port Alliance chimed down
below and say I have great friends and
stuff like this okay the problem with
your mental illness is you lack self-
awor is you don't
know um but I can't say all don't have
friends sure some have
friends some truly believe they have
friends and they're
not they talk bad about them they accuse
them of things they didn't do they bait
them try to control them they're not
there for them they don't have much to
offer do
they
surface examples I've I've there's and
I'm not going to single out anybody but
there's someone on YouTube She's a
diagnosed sociopath makes lots of videos
I've watched some and she goes on and on
about how great a friend she has and
she's a great friend to them and when I
see them interact she's just completely
narcissistic it's just all about her
it's gross
your friends are total losers your your
friends have no conscious self it's just
all there for
you they have contacts they have
Associates potential targets victims
they don't have friends they don't they
have no idea how to be a
friend Psychopaths and most manipulative
exploitive
people can be charming and fun and
exciting polite and nice and sharing and
open can't
they we must have higher
standards but this is only at first see
the typical n like extreme narcissist
psychopath they'll go through high
school they might be popular they might
be the president things like this and
and and they they move into different
groups it's it's real common for
psychopaths to move around a lot
literally from like City to city and
they'll drain and exploit everyone they
can and move right on to the next and
everybody likes at first they're
gravitating yay fun and it's usually
about two or three months or they're not
so popular anymore people are just
they're done with them the popularity
soon dies people
leave besides that they get feelings of
of like off-putting is the best one I
can use uncomfortable obnoxious things
like this there's nothing
deep it's shallow it can't last long
shallow personalities no goals
aspirations interests desire s or
they're just pipe dreams fantasies
Grandeur don't make sense it's just
about being rich goodlooking
famous fake never follows through total
entitlement I can I should be famous and
Rich for what what have you done
nothing why they're unstable this makes
them impulsive they stop and start
relationships suddenly they look for
immediate gratification shortterm
relationships cuz they go too fast but
the biggest is never ever emotional
connection people who lack massive
self-awareness don't care who you
are let me be very clear with that
someone that does not know who they are
doesn't care who you are they don't even
care who they are they don't want to
know they neglect and they deny and they
try to just ignore how they feel
everything about them themselves they
don't care who you are there's no
commitment they lack commitment
commitment requires investment what has
a toxic narcissist borderline how do
they invest in your relationship I would
love to know can anyone out there tell
me how they invest in your relationship
what did they
do nothing take take take exploit
extract use
suck yeah I don't mean that kind of suck
like suck your energy right out of
you they have no moral value or Compass
I know they say they do that's what
lacking self-awareness
means they don't value honesty Integrity
respect self-respect loyalty compassion
Integrity or I said that remorse empathy
none of this they don't
care but it sounds good
relationships are never equal they're
never equal they seek power and
control only a small percentage will
fall for
this even the ones that do though that's
not a
friendship if you need deep emotional
connection don't settle not that not
that don't settle don't don't don't
don't say oh yeah I'm going to spend the
rest of my life with somebody
and never have an emotional
connection this video is inspired by the
comments you guys left in my video
yesterday yesterday's video was 12 ways
or 12 signs they don't love
you and some of the comments down there
they're great but I wanted to make this
video so you would
understand there's no deep emotional
connection you are telling me in those
comments that you need it and you're
telling me that you spent time and had a
relationship and you're committed to
someone who never did
it borderlines and narcissists don't
emotionally connect to people they never
have emotional connection is a dire
emotional need for most of us and why
because we emotionally connected with
someone growing up in our childhood it
could have been Mom it could have been
dad it could have been Grandma Grandpa
Uncle Aunt sister brother friends
friends parents teachers
babysitters someone who looks you in the
eye
and treat you like a human not a child
not a
pain but a human and once you have that
you need it
forever
desperately but if you're going to spend
your life with someone who's never
emotionally connected they're never
going to emotionally connect with you
they don't need it they don't want it
they're avoid it they push you away they
feel vulnerable don't like it too close
too smothering
friend what's your definition of a
friend can you guys just tell me or just
tell me some key factors some
points uh I I read and I don't remember
it's probably
AI a person we
know where we Bond and have mutual
affection that's one definition I looked
up I need
from my
friends mandatory or you're not my
friend unless you love me unconditional
unless your care for me is
unconditional that you can forgive me
it's okay if I
fail you love me when I'm down and I'm
up you celebrate with me and you cry
with
me it feels
good they always have my back
and I always have theirs we're friends
forever we have shared values all of
them and a deep emotional connection
that makes us equal building an
architecture of a
relationship with meaning and
purpose you think you got that with your
borderline
narcissist no never and we might think
we did we're not sure maybe we had
someone that did emotionally connect
with us in childhood but we also had
parents that did
not so we need it but we're used to not
having it it's a condition right and so
we seek this emotional connection we
need it but we're used to people that
don't Supply it people who are not
emotionally available like that and
we're used to that we keep trying and
trying and trying not accepting that
they don't do it
let me know what you guys think what a
friend is give me some examples how you
know that they're not they weren't your
friend that they can't be
friends a borderline narcissist will
have people in their phone and they need
something every day from you because
they're not self-reliant they exploit
you and they will text five of you and
whoever replies
first that's it screw the other four of
you don't care don't need you right now
I'll need you
tomorrow and they don't reciprocate a
damn
thing that's how they gain power over us
and control over us so let me know what
you guys think a friend is some some
things that it requires for you yeah let
me know some examples if you can I'd
appreciate that but always love yourself
first guys okay appreciate a thumbs up
subscribe to the channel you want
coaching with me you can find me at
David dear.com thank you guys
