Gogglebox ... basically

There's nothing left! Let's catch some frays. Let's get this vlog officially started. What's wrong with that? Yeah, I'll go with that. Yeah. Is that the intro? That's the intro. How you feeling? I'm alright. You're tired, you're telling me. I'm not tired, I'm just feeling... Hey, listen, people are worried... Yeah, I'm feeling weird. No, I just wanted to say this. People, I think there's been a couple of comments because you were a bit shaky in the last vlog. And people have brought up the word anemic again, which is a word that has plagued your life since I've known you. It might be that. It's not plagued my life. I was anemic when I was pregnant. Yeah, but you're prone to that sort of thing. So maybe we should get you some iron supplements. Those little iron shots. Remember, I used to have to pour them in the orange juice every morning when I was pregnant. But I thought that just made you feel tired. I didn't realise that made you have little weird spells. But you don't like going to the doctor. So this won't go in, will it? Because people will tell you off. People in the comments will now back me up and say, Claire, you've got to look after yourself. You've got to make sure you go to the doctor. Look at me, I love going to the doctors. It's a day out for me. We're the opposite. You go to the doctors for an itchy arse. Yeah. I'm always just like, ah, it'll pass. It'll be alright. Yeah. Shall I come and sit next to you? Yeah. Shall we look like we like each other? Oh, yeah, it's that time again, innit, where we've got to pretend. Don't say that. People like us because they think... I'm joking. The thing, why I think people like us is that... Here he goes. No, because you don't... We don't really pretend that we really like each other. Oh, God. We take the piss out of each other. Yeah. Now, people are always getting on at me for playing with my hair, and I've just seen myself in the camera and my hair looks s***. It looks great. What are you talking about? Great mane of hair you've got going on there. What are you talking about? It's Saturday night. The boys are off playing Roblox. Have you panned them off with some Robux? I haven't, actually, but I will do later because I want us to have a little evening together. A little romantic evening. Have a couple of beers. Watch a film. I'm going to order you a curry later as well. Me? You're going to order me a curry? Yeah. So don't say I don't look after you. It's curry night for us this week. Saturday night. Saturday night! There is nothing left to watch on television. There's nothing left! What are we going to watch this evening? That was the thing we were talking about. We've got nothing left to watch. Yeah, but we did have a conversation earlier in the week when me, you, oh actually the four of us, me, you, Harrison, Judd, we watched a catchphrase and we said we would stick on some old catchphrases. Yeah, we'll watch some old catchphrases. I love Roy Walker, you know I do. Would you want to do one episode? I don't know if you've noticed this about me but I take catchphrases quite seriously. I have. Remember that time I secretly filmed you? Oh God, if I could find that footage and insert it. Oh no, I can't because the kids are there. It makes me look so bad. It makes me look like a d***. And you get so annoyed when I get it right and you think you're really good at catchphrases but I get it right quite a lot. Oh my God, I think we're going to have to have a catchphrase off tonight. Claire was secretly filming me while we were watching catchphrases a few years ago. Every time she kept getting a question right. I didn't know she was filming me as well and when she shows me that video it makes me die. Oh, it's horrible. Every time she beats me to a catchphrase I keep doing that thing, you know when like you lose at the Oscars and you're like I keep going yeah, no, that's right, yeah, good one. But because I'm constantly filming him I can see him going Do you know the best thing about that video is you've poured yourself a Magnus cider into a big red wine glass and you're sitting there like you just look like everything about you, you're just a Right, are we having a catchphrase off then? I'm ready for some catchphrase. Alright, well we'll finish these beers let's order a curry, watch some catchphrase and we'll see who comes out on top. Now listen guys, you know we don't like to sort of be those those vloggers where we show off our idyllic lifestyles but but right now if you are not jealous of this we are 11, there is something wrong with you Right, you ready for some catchphrase? Yes You're not allowed to punch me They won't see it Right, catch some classic Roy Walker catchphrase Let's catch some phrase Right, the warm up, the warm up ones Backseat driver F*** I don't like going to the cinema Sean Connery Cool That's right in the theme of the vlog Right, where are they going? The Three Continents They've got nowhere to go now Right, get me an hotel maybe just sit there 100 pounds 100 He's nailed it Tourist trap Tourist trap is the right answer Laurel Hardy Rest in laurels Passion fruit You can watch this back in the edit mate and see how early I was compared to you Early We're going to follow I can tell This is going to end in disaster Storm in a teacup Bunny bread Breadwinner Blind date On the buses Jesus Christ Thanks Roy Come on Stuart A little pop it on there That tastes like vegetables Does it? Don't choke on it You don't Stuart Fire drill I don't know Cotton glass Hand packed I've never heard of that It's good but it's not right Shooting stars Flapping cat Cat wings Oh no Joke's in the pack Pack of lies Cross wires Flower power That's it Riding the wave Riding the crest of a wave Here we go That can't go in Here she comes Bloody hell I don't know if we're going to be allowed to put that on YouTube You might want to zoom up there Do you not think I would have done better if I remembered them Oh no It's alright It goes under the table Second episode of the evening Yes I have Roy Where did we go Maldives No Virgin Islands Where's the Virgin Islands There's the Caribbean I know what you're doing You only set it up No one's going to find that funny except for us No one's going to find that funny apart from us Ah you little sausage Oh god have we been in lockdown too long Yeah I think so News of the world Breaking news Evening news Evening dress In the name of the law Things go bubble in the neck I said it first Vertical take off Frenchman French dresser Hot discussion Heated discussion Teddy boy I'm quite impressive Oh Not a cartridge are you not Big crack Lock stock and two smoking barrels Lock stock and barrel Oh that was before that film wasn't it Dammit Spinning top Dog top Top dog Knuckle sandwich I mean knuckle duster Big face Cross eyed Nobody needs contest Sleeping bull Little house on the prairie Body clock Three of a kind Shot in the arm Body clock Bulldozer Body clock Alright last one for the night Episode three After Roy Walker there was a new guy and the first time he came on he fell down the stairs Roy Walker, I might be wrong let me know this in the comments was the first person to portray Bond James Bond I know we keep talking about James Bond What? On radio, I might be wrong about that but there's something telling me that I'm not It was the bloke that did Blockbusters Oh who's that again Can't remember his name, he was the one Didn't he have big glasses Yeah, it just came to me then as I was remembering, it's not Roy Walker I was going to say I was going to say Dennis Nielsen Dennis Nielsen's a serial killer You're thinking of Dennis Norton again Dennis Norton, oh yeah it's alright on the night Bob Holness I wouldn't have remembered that name in a million years I think it was Bob Holness he was the first person to portray James Bond Interesting I just love dipping poppadoms in sauce Flying a ball Caution to the wind Because that's what it is for Come on Roy Three piece sweet We are ridiculous Draw a line in the sky Skyline You sure it's not draw a line in the sky Oh yeah you're tense, relax Go up Going up in smoke Shouting man Chalk and cheese Tank top Four seasons The four seasons Thank you What a start of the night Hold the light Hold the torch Blow torch Sound of music Bull by the horns Foghorn Crossroads To ground Keeping your ear to the ground Putting your ear to the ground Keeping your ear to the ground Having your ear to the ground Listening Hearing the ground Giving the right answer Are we doing a big walk tomorrow? Yeah a big walk. Bestest boys in the whole world. Paisley. No. Come here. Paisley. It is not playtime. No. Come and sit down. It's not playtime. No. Paisley. Sit down. No. Lay down. It's not playtime.