“Life’s Too Short To Deal With This Drama”

[Music] brought to you by the every dooll app start budgeting for free today my husband and I are Deb free um live in a beautiful place Grand Colorado about 20 months ago um sorry if I'm talking fast we had to go no contact with his um very abusive family after I was assaulted and um whoa yes um who who assaulted you his mother and his brother H physically assaulted you yes they assaulted us when we decided um we were no longer going to take their abuse my husband and I moved to Colorado from California 10 years ago to help take care of his mother and father lived moved right next door they gifted us a property of land in exchange for doing that and two weeks after getting here we realized we' made a horrible mistake but we were kind of stuck anyway back in 1993 um they set up an irrevocable trust with the three siblings and um it came to my home or to our home which it wasn't supposed to and I saw the specs on it and everything uh being $300,000 for each child um when the passing of their parents but if they lived to be 100 they wouldn't get it so um when all of this horrible stuff happened my husband even attempted suicide after I'm sorry um after this happened 20 months ago because we had come here to help take care of them and were treated really badly um anyway we are worried that the irrevocable trust is no longer available because we know that he was cut out of the will for not allowing his family to um treat treat him I badly anymore and um are you still living next door actually she sold she sold her house that's pretty much when the the real problem started she had decided to sell her house after the after my father-in-law died um in 2021 um and she was demanding that we sell our home that we built on this little piece of property next door to them and when we told her no we weren't going to sell it she wanted to split the the money for of the house and everything with the other two older siblings and we said no we're not going to do that and it okay so you still live in the property she sold the property next door where did they move to she moved she moved in with her other CH one of her other children in Lake havu uh uh Arizona oh a good distance away yeah exactly and we were granted permanent restraining or them as well so do you guys have you have an income do you make a living um we live we're on retire we have my husband's retirement and we collect Social Security as well and he does um how old are you handyman work I'm 66 he's 69 oh wow but we retired at um in 2012 um this like an 80y old woman attacking you she actually a 92y old woman these people are freaks um well our new neighbor happens to be a forensic psychologist and he has been so helpful um in my husband and I get through most of what we've gone through um okay um so so okay so you have a piece of ground you're 66 years old you have social security coming in and you have what else coming in and you a disability uh well he has yes he he's bipo has bipolar one disorder but he never collected disability or anything he always worked we owned a business together no do you have income coming in that's what I'm trying to get at honey okay do you have in you have social security coming in what else do you have coming in um retirement and his um handyman work he makes about $800 a month but we're we're fine we're well so so here's my point um it's not worth it well that's that's why that was what we we had decided we decided when we not worth it when we could you possibly hold them to an irrevocable trust depending on how it's worded what state it was in I guess you got a copy of it you could take it to an attorney and get legal advice if you want to do that you can uh yeah I for me it falls under the heading of Life's Too Short um screw it you're 66 go on with your life oh my gosh that exactly and that's what we've been doing my my husband except the part where you call me and ask me if you're because you're all worried about the trust that part where you're not going on with your life MH that well that didn't come up until just recently and my husband because he lived in a family where money was the manipulation so don't let them just forget about it don't worry about it yeah walk away if you get a check in the mail after she passes away then great but I would plan my life as though that money is not coming and I would okay dust my sandals off and go into the next next thing because it's just not worth your soul yeah yeah that and that's what that's what we've what we've been trying to do and and like I said we we're debt-free we we have a good life we have good friends yeah miss our kids like hell but um but it's been it's been a it's been an awful awful thing in watching where are your kids where's your kids my I've got two sons in California I've got a daughter in Arizona and a daughter in Texas you just miss them because they're distance yeah we were extremely close family and we we left them to come I know but I'm saying there but you're you you're still connected to them relationally you just they just have to like most people they don't live in the same town with can you sell your sell your place and go be by your kids you you you're speaking as though you're not adults and that you're trapped that's that was our our original idea was to come here when his parents no that's all behind backwards go forward put the house on that you live from your s Texas or live near your children it it's impossible now because of the cost of well the cost of living we are the home that we live in is worth just a little under three or a little over 300,000 and the if we move back to California where the grandkids are there's just no way we we don't have the um we wouldn't be debt free and we want to we want to live debt free so we do go see them so that's not a problem okay so buy some airline tickets and just head over there and Life's good yeah I I really I mean you could go you could you've got a copy the trash you could go get legal advice and um and uh it depends on how it's worded honestly the weird thing about an irrevocable trust is it may be revocable um it's uh depending on who who's where in the thing what's how it's in charge who's in charge that kind of stuff but really um it's um yeah I don't know I don't know who put it together I don't know how it's written and without reading it I wouldn't have a clue so you could go get legal advice if you want to but every step you take towards quote defending yourself unquote uh puts them all back in your head rentree again and I really wouldn't let them back in your head think of it this way every every conversation you have every thing you Google trying to figure this out is a choice to be miserable in the present it's not worth it yeah just not worth it no I wouldn't spend I cuz even if you find out you're completely legally right you might have to spend a tremendous amount of effort and money to force it create your free every dollar budget today 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