Best of Bernie Mac Clips All In One Video.

I'm tired man. I'm sick man. I was on Peachtree. There's so many Peachtrees in this ************. I don't know where. I'll tell you where. Is that where I was? I'm so tired man. These motherfuckers with these wheelchairs and these motherfucking gloves. What the **** is up with this ---- here? This ************ got a glove, cut off fingers and ----. Upper body's stronger than a ************. But you gotta take him to the damn floor and wipe his mouth every goddamn 15 minutes. Take your plegic ass in the motherfucking crib. Stupid son of a mother bitch. Come by me. I'll take the brake off your motherfucking wheelchair. Sit you on the escalator you ************. I'm tired like it is. Tired of stupid ----. I'm tired. I got a dream. I'm tired of that motherfucking speech. I had a dream. If I hear that ************ one more time I'll cut my goddamn off. Somebody else write a goddamn dream. Shit. One day, one day we ain't gonna see it. We ain't gonna see it. Black folk gonna always be there. Hook me up. I'm tired of the ******* hookup. Look out for a ************. Look out for your goddamn self. Stinking son of a bitch. I'll say it for you. You tired too. You scared. I'm tired of black folks begging. I got a dream that one day black folks gonna put acting like crabs in the barrel. I got a dream that one day fat women gonna stop wearing their belly out and ----. I got a dream that one day black folks gonna give head without talking. Am I doing it right? Shut the suck it. Don't talk sucking. You talk out to us. You supposed to suck dick. I don't talk when I eat pussy dude. It's a time and place for every goddamn thing. I got a dream. I got a whole bunch of motherfucking dreams I can tell here tonight. I'm tired of walking down peace routes on motherfucking land all on the concrete. What type of ---- it is? I'm ******* healthier than a ************. I can't walk without kicking myself. What's wrong with you? Oh nothing. What you get up bro? Oh I'm tired. **** you tired bro. What you do? Nothing. How the **** you know what you're doing then you ************ you? Man don't let me be no man. Man I have an ordinance. In his bum, **** him up on sight. Get a hammer and knock him. Get a motherfucking ass. Oh bullshit. See ever since the king of comedy come out you know black folks count your money. I ain't got all kind of phones up. You're doing good. Let me count your money. 35 million. 37 million. Like we splitting in four ways. See that's what you motherfucking think. Y'all doing good. Motherfucker I ain't got no goddamn money. The fame come before the motherfucking fortune. I'm still a nigga. These suits I got to take back. My daughter's boyfriend now. See motherfuckers ain't got money. You know motherfuckers think you ain't never been young. Like we ain't never talked. Man you're a girl man. You better stay well. Old man doing good. You think I never said no ---- like that? Motherfucker come to my house all nice. How you doing nigga? The nigga want something nice. How you doing sir? They talk right ************. Don't call me ************ like you be doing behind my back. **** that. Ain't nobody live with me. My mother-in-law call me talking about I gotta live with you. Don't let nobody live with you. No I'm serious. When you get older, when you get your house. **** that. I got a four bed room. But I put ---- in there so motherfuckers can't ask me. Can they split a night? I got a motor. My old car motors and ---- in one motherfucking room. I got a coffin in another motherfucking room. Just in case some ---- jump off you know. I'm serious man. I sit there all the time man. I be ******* around. I just be watching ---- man. Flying that day. Like we progress. I was on the plane today. Coming in. It was a black pilot. I was so proud to see that ************ boy. I said a black pilot. But I was when that ************ started driving. I knew he was black. Speeding down the runway. Motherfucking ----. I should have known something was wrong with that ************ when I saw that motorcycle helmet on that ************'s head. I knocked on the motherfucking door. What the **** is wrong with you man? Slow this bitch down. Motherfucker plane ain't nothing to play with man. Everybody talking about bucking your seatbelt. See they got some stupid ass rules. Ain't king ---- save you on no motherfucking plane y'all. And motherfucking white folks. White people like to give you orders. Buckle up. I said I heard you. Buckle up now. I said don't holler at me. I'm not hollering. I'm not buckling a motherfucking thing. I hope this plane go all off balance so I can just fly in there and tackle the **** out your motherfucking ass. Buckle your seatbelt. What the **** a seatbelt gonna do to you? You're gonna be a crushed son of a bitch. Ain't gonna make no goddamn difference. Some people some stupid say some stupid ass ---- to you man. Like you know like being married. My wife she's, I love my wife, but women say stupid ----. Y'all like to be romantic. **** romance. Turn the music on. Put some rose petals on the floor. Sit down man. **** all that romantic ----. I'll **** it with the news. I don't need that bullshit. Bend over. Turn around. Put your head over here. Open your legs. Pump. Pump. You don't need no goddamn music for that ----. When some ---- good's for you, huh? Man can't see. Women can fake an orgasm. Men, we can't fake no orgasm. I don't care how cool you try to be. When your mother just something about tell on your ass. You pump your, you can tell by the pump. Just listen. How you gonna fake? Try to fake that ----. Your eye, your face gonna tell it. You can't fake it. And if you do it too quick, they're gonna cut your ass out. Oh ************. Punk ass ************. You ain't never know the woman come quick. Man, we come quick. I think that's so unfair. I'm gonna ask God, why you play us like that man? Why we got the bus quick? You know, give me some ******* stamina. I used to be long. Now I'm just, I ain't even in the game. Motherfucker already starved me. I'm like a bad ball player on the bench. It's the truth. But I have fun man. But see now success is a bitch. Depending on where you, how you look at success. I look at success like this. I say everybody supposed to grow to another level. But when you start thinking and believing this bullshit up here. Motherfucker, this is bullshit. You better still tell a joke ************. Kings and queens of comedy. Where were we at? Where were we at? Ain't no motherfucking kings or queens out here. We comedians. 40,000 motherfuckers. Y'all the kings. Y'all the queens. Y'all support our motherfucking ass. I ain't saying it for no applause. I'm saying like a T.I. motherfucking is. Shit. I ain't, don't be no motherfucking fool man. Don't start believing what the motherfuckers be putting in the paper. Great. Sellout. Phenomenal. Super. Fantastic. Genius. You know, they quickly call you a genius. Those are the most two overrated words in the world. Genius, brilliant, and black folks word, blessed. I'm so sick of that motherfucking word. I don't know what to do, man. Next time, ************, tell me he blessed and beg. I'm gonna hit that ************ right in the mouth. How you doing brother? I'm blessed. You know, you got $2. That's why I tell my brother, my brother, my family, you know, to get caught up in this bullshit. I was over his house last night before I left to shoot booze. And you know, when you have your kids, they see the video, they see all that old bullshit, you know, uh, shake it down. My little nephew, he kind of slow. You know something wrong with it. Ain't the motherfucking look like this here. Something wrong. I said, man, why don't you take that ************ to an orthodontist, man. Don't let him suffer like that. No God damn mo. Man, that ************ sit up there. My brother said, he said, was playing pool. He said, man, my, my, my, he said, my, my son keep asking me, you know, different things. He grow enough. He said, I want to talk to you. So he came, I said, bring him here. So he came to me and he said, uh, I'm burning. He said, what's the difference between a hypothetical question and a realistic question? I said, well, uh, they basically mean the same man, but sometimes they be decent. I said, uh, for example, go upstairs and ask your mama, will she make love to the next door neighbor for $150,000? He went upstairs. He came back and he said, uncle Bernie, mama says she'll **** the next door neighbor, the neighborhood and the next block for $150,000. I said, well, go ask your sister. Would she make love to the mailman for $150,000? He went downstairs, came back. He said, man, sister says she'll make love to the mailman, the milkman and any other goddamn man for $150,000. I said, well, I'm gonna tell you something. I said, you know what? Hypothetically speaking, we should have $300,000, but realistically speaking, man, y'all living with two hoes. Good night Atlanta y'all. Good night y'all. Bullshit. We like to fight. We fight about nothing. Everybody's mother ruined. I'm following a piece of chicken. That's your fourth motherfucking piece, nigga. Say something for somebody else. Some bitch greedy ************ who put hot sauce. Oh, we fight over some ----. We argue over directions. Go this way. Go that way. I said, go to pull this ************ off, but we're going to see who's going to go where. I pulled this ************ off. It was a humbug before y'all got here. This is a beautiful ass show. We got Laverte, Monique, Mays, me, motherfuckers on Sunday night, Thanksgiving coming. It was a humbug before y'all got here. It's some motherfuckers right now. Couples ain't speaking to each other, right? Bitch. Yo mama, bitch. All because you dress late. The women, y'all dress too much. Y'all take too much time dressing. Show started at eight. Get your motherfucking ass together. Y'all be dressing at one o'clock. We don't leave at nine. Park and be all fucked up waiting on your ass. We be hollering at your ass all day. Come on. I'm coming. Putting on all those goddamn clothes. Y'all look good, but y'all dress like the mummy. Y'all got panty, bra, couldn't be no woman. Y'all wear too much motherfucking ---- for me. Pantyhose, panty, bra, slip, the bra connected to the panty and ----. Your body be soggy than a ************. I know your coochie just be itching like a summer bitch. You know it do. They be trying to play that bitch off too, boy. See my daughter get mad now. My daughter's 24. So let me tell you about this wedding ----. See women, y'all are motherfuckers. Y'all are motherfuckers, boy. Y'all send them to be crying and ----. **** all that motherfucking money for a goddamn wedding. Go to the goddamn city hall, say you do, get the **** on with your goddamn life. $20,000 for a ************ to walk down the aisle and answer a goddamn question. I'm not gonna lie, man. I mean no goddamn sin. And women, y'all just be crying. **** all that goddamn crying. You ain't paying no motherfucking thing. $20,000. Shit, you better not come to me telling me you're gonna divorce my goddamn daughter. I'll have somebody kill your motherfucking ass. I don't give a **** if she got diarrhea. You better kiss her closed mouth, ************. If she get too fat, you better **** her from the back. I don't give a ****. I'm not lying, dog. $20,000. You better eat her motherfucking pussy from the side. I'll kill that ************, man. You gonna divorce me. Then they gonna tell me they're gonna fly their minister in from New Orleans. He's gonna cost him $3,000 to $4,000. To read two paragraphs? Man, **** him. In the name of the Lord, **** him. I'll read that bitch myself. Jesus coming? Shit. That's bullshit. Women, y'all, y'all love, you go to churches, all these black churches. Black churches bigger than this motherfucking whole place here. Full ******* services. Nursery. Whole nine yards. Who there? Women. Ain't nothing but women all up in that ************. That's my pastor. That ************ don't even know your first name. I got the tide. Tide, ----. My wife was cooking last Sunday. I got up, house smelling good or something, but you know, I said, man, football coming on. I called from the boy. Remember my wife cooking, man? Come on over, we're gonna jam. I go downstairs, go get a little piece of little meat. Don't eat that. I said, what the **** I can't eat? It's for my pastor. Man, **** you and your pastor. You take some food out this motherfucking house today, somebody gonna get shot. I'm not bullshitting. **** your pastor. In the name of the Lord, **** him. No, **** him. You ain't taking no food out here. Ain't that a bitch? Better pray for some food. He ain't getting no motherfucking thing from me. My wife told me that ain't right. I said, take some ---- on out of here. We're gonna be in jet, I swear to God. I'm gonna be choking the **** out of your ass. Motherfucker don't hit me like that. You crazy ************. You don't let nobody hit you. My daughter and boyfriend had a fight. I told him, you know, I don't get nobody's business, right? I came home, my wife said, it was Argen downstairs. I said, Argen? She said, I think he hit her. I said, that's nigga ----. When we home, you get ready to get fucked up. I waited all day for this ************ to come over. I went out, man, man, I couldn't get no rest. That mother came up. How you doing, Mr. Mack? I stole on the pound. I said, you hit my daughter, man? No, no, no. Let me tell you something. I said, you hit my daughter? I just held a pistol like that. I wasn't gonna do nothing. I just wanted him to see it. Let him know what could possibly happen. I just shot that ************, told the police that it went off. 12 times, I just got it. I just got it. You know I ain't bullshit. Y'all can fuss and fight. Don't hit my motherfucking daughter. Son of a bitch, you. I'll kill you, I'll kill you, man. And then come to your funeral like a ************, come and look at you. You know how we do at funerals. Funerals, black funerals, be fun at them all. We say some stupid ---- there. I be laughing. People be thinking I'm crazy. That ************ ain't got no ----. Look at this ************ dead. I ain't laughing at the dead, ************. I'm laughing at the reaction. Look at this. He ain't know the ************. He ain't know him. Look at that. Always be a fat ************ that fall the **** out. All the men be saying at the same time, god damn. We gotta carry this bitch out. You carry this big ************ out, 15 minutes later, she regroup and walk and come back. Fall out again. Boy, I was so goddamn tired. I told her, mother, who's carrying that big bitch out? I told her, this is my last motherfucking time carrying this bitch out. My motherfucking nuts hurting and ----, picking this bitch up. This bitch fall out at her own risk. My friend's mother died. She's fatter than a ************, right? He said, man, you gonna be a pallbearer. I said, you must be crazier than a ************. I'd be the crane driver. I ain't driving. Your mama too heavy. I love your mama, but god damn. Now we say some fucked up ----. You ever know that at a funeral, how we go feed the body and the conversation we be having while we're looking at the body. That ---- be funny as a ************ to me. He look good, don't he? He look just like himself. Who the **** he supposed to look like? Tell you, man, we funny. My auntie man explained how my cousin died for about 30 minutes. Couldn't get through with the motherfucking story. Just kept saying the same ----. Old motherfuckers do this ----. Girl, what happened? Well, it was raining real hard and I just got my hair did and I told I went to bingo and he came and picked me up because it was raining real hard. I just got my hair did and I didn't want my hair to fall. So I went to bingo and he came and picked me up and, you know, it was raining real, real hard and I said, Lord, I just got my hair did and he didn't say nothing. I should have knew something was wrong with him because he was real quiet because he came and picked me up from bingo. I want $750. I don't give him 250 because, you know, I wouldn't get my hair done early and then I went on a bingo and he wasn't saying nothing. So we got in the house, you know, I guess I was rolling my hair but I just got my hair done and, you know, I went to bingo. I put the money in the drawer and I was rolling my hair. It was still raining real hard and I heard a noise and I said, what the **** is that? And I went to the stairs. I said, Thurman, Thurman, Thurman, Thurman, Thurman, Thurman, Thurman. He didn't say nothing. I kept, I said, Thurman, Thurman because I was rolling my hair but I just, you know, I got my hair done that morning and I was sitting on the bed. I heard a noise and I said somebody fell like they were breaking in and I called him Thurman, Thurman, Thurman, Thurman, Thurman. I didn't hear nothing. I went downstairs and there he was on the floor. He was dead. I knew he was dead. I was so nervous. I called 11-9. I was so nervous because it was raining real hard. I didn't even get finished rolling my hair. I had two rollers because I just got my hair did and I heard a noise. I thought somebody was breaking in. That's what I thought and I said, oh, somebody breaking in and I said, Thurman, Thurman, Thurman. He didn't say nothing. He was laying on the floor like that. He was laying there. When I saw him, he was dead. Lord, I ain't never going back in that room again. I ain't never going back in there. You'll be looking at at the funeral. This bitch was at the end of the road. All I heard, I was rolling my hair and I said, Thurman, I said, bitch, if you don't shut the **** up with that fool. We funny. Matter of fact, can't be no homosexual like me. For some reason, that's my bullshit. That fat woman, they like the **** out of me, man. I've been in L.A., man. I'm a homosexual. Is there anything I can do for you? No, you can't do a motherfucking thing for me. Get the **** away from me before we be on the news. I can't even imagine, I can't imagine a man sucking my dick for nothing. I'm not bullshit. You go to jail, I went to jail, man. No, no, man. She don't do, she don't want to do ---- no more because I'm doing well. She thinks she ******* got me when she won't meet. When I first hooked up, she took my dick in the car and all that kind of ----. No, no, no, no, no, no. I don't mean to hurt. You know, trust me, dry pan is not ---- like, you know, I suck this. You know what the **** she doing? Her neck hurt and all that bullshit. You know, there's about three or four sucks. I mean, bitch, you got to get back in the gym. This ---- don't make no motherfucking sense because I'm tired of ----. She's sucking it. I got to, you know, all of a sudden, man, she don't give me head on, so she ain't doing the ---- right no more. I got to show her. No, she hitting it. Don't do it like that. Do it like this. That's bad when you don't want, what the **** is this? You got to know how to know. No, no, no. **** that. Something like you got some respect. I just don't like it. I'm getting old. That bullshit got to believe ---- in your heart. I can suck it. Thank you. Say this and I can suck it. Don't deny yourself. Say this and I can suck it. I can suck it. I know I can suck it. It's my conviction. I know I can suck it. That's how we do it. That's how women do you. When you pay rent and ----, they love your motherfucking ass, boy. He's not, he's a good man. He can't **** though. And women decide where they're going to give a man some pussy. You ever know that ----? They go out with you three or four times. They tell their girlfriend, yeah girl, you still going with that going out with that ugly ************? Yeah, he's nice. He real nice. Girl, he took me to the Bahamas and everything. He paid for junior tuition. I think I'm going to give him a little bit tonight. I'm just going to give him a little bit like it's a piece of fruit or some ----. Then y'all measure the ****. Y'all measure the pumps. I got 30 pumps. Get up now. Get up. I wish a mother would tell me to get up. She had to call me. That's like, wait, don't tell me to get up. My dick go in this end. I don't give a ****. She had one out of middle ************ here. That's my ******* end. She tell the judge, he fucked the ---- out. See, I tell the truth. I ain't bullshitting. I ain't trying to put on no goddamn air. You know, we ******* on with women to be T. I'll be teasing and playing around. Shit. Don't tease me. We're in the back. Don't press. Don't be pressing. No, nothing around here. Don't be doing that. This ************ is young, eager. I'll **** you on ABC. I don't give a ****. My wife would kiss me. What are you doing? Just a few minutes. Just wait. I have to wait. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. When I get done, then I deal with you. Oh, no, we funny. Everybody talk about man. Like I said, I'm married 26 years, right? So everybody talking about me and my wife, man. Y'all look good together. Y'all best friend. That's some true ----. Now we'll see. Motherfucker didn't see the ************ beginning. No, the ************ beginning with a mother. Man, man, I'll have some humble wife. Most of you hit your wife. You got there, right? That ************ hit me. No, we don't know. That's the difference of a white relationship and black relationship. We humble. We ******* fight. Don't mean we don't love each other. Well, that means we got disagreements, you know, you know, because black women like to run your motherfucking ass, you know, my wife, you tell me, man, we've heard that, man, you ain't going nowhere tonight. Tell me when the ************ going on. Goddamn. Well, I think I bet you don't go out. I bet you don't. You don't tell me when the folks are going on. Motherfucker. Well, go out and see what happens. You got that right? I'm going out. Oh, I'm all good. I want to see what the **** is going to happen. I'm 23, 24 years old. Y'all tell him, ************, he can't go no goddamn way. She said, I tell you what you do, ************. Go out and where you going. I'm a walk in on your motherfucking ass. Why? Boy, I went out in the goddamn while that they got them part. I was watching that door like a ************. I saw a ************ look like a boy. But I told, you know, like black folks, man, you know, I told my daughter, my daughter was outside playing. So, you know, we had come to my cousin came over with a boyfriend. You know, little business, you know, you know, just a little business, you know, took a few brews, you know, kids and white folks in the house, little business, you know, we ain't buying nobody. You know, my daughter said, Daddy, can I stay out a little late? I said, yeah, you stay out a little late, but motherfuckers, no black folks. Stay where I can ******* see you. That means be right ************ there. When I come to that goddamn window, do like that there, you better do like this here. I don't give a ****. How many times I come in that ************ window? Man, we got to drink a little brew, talk a ----, laugh, and take care of a little business. Man, my wife said, baby girl ain't here yet. I said, damn, sure ain't. I went in the front, couldn't see nothing, ain't nowhere. I walked down the street, couldn't find her. Walked through the alley, my wife on the porch, you see her? You see her? You see her? Going back in, going back in. I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm nervous like a ************. I'm fine. I'm fine. I walked four blocks, two blocks this way, two blocks that motherfucking way. Walked back through the alley, all of a sudden I saw this ************ pull up. My daughter getting out the back seat. Oh, man. Lady said, hi, Mr. Mack. I'm sorry. She with me. I'm like, bitch, don't you say that. I don't even know the ************. Don't you say ---- to me. Get your tucked ass upstairs. You I'm getting ready to whoop your motherfucking ass. You ain't goddamn right. I went to whoop her motherfucking ass. My wife said, don't whoop her hard. I said, look, you don't tell me how to whoop my own motherfucking child. You don't tell me how to whoop her. I said, don't whoop her hard. I said, you don't tell me what the **** to whoop her. I just told you. She said, don't whoop her hard. ****, don't you tell me before I know it, man. And you know, we make an announcement. Black folks make an announcement. They fight. They fight. Boy, I was fighting like third grade. You know, third grade, you don't block ----. You close your eyes, swing it like a ************. My mother would hit me. I was hitting her ass. My daughter, they fight, made an announcement. And when black folks fight, ----, we make an announcement, too. My wife cut the **** out of me, boy. Stabbed me in the side. You know, you got to make an announcement. That ************ hit me with that knife. This ************ done cut me on the side. This bitch done cut me. Why we got to tell a ************ like they can't see it? This ************ done bust my ************. This ************ done hit me in my face, y'all. Like we can't see what the **** happened. Shit, no, no, no, man, no, no. I ain't got like that. I'm a cocksucker now. I'm not ashamed to say it. Last year this time, two years ago, I just started two years ago. I can't make you think I'm no veteran, you know. I just started. I'm a cocksucker now, you know. Boy, you got to be strong when you want to go, you know. I didn't know at first. Shit, you a cocksucker, boy, they'll kill you. Women, men, women love all sex. They love, look at everybody right here, everyone, look at. Yeah, they love it, boy. Soon you talking about, when you go to a woman, they'll file sexual harassment if you pitch them on their titty or go on the crack of their head or something like that. What the **** is wrong with you? They're press charging. There he is. That's the ************. But if you walk up to him and say, girl, I sure like to lick your ass. Watch what they say. When? Oh, you talk about licking some ass. They're all right. You crazy there, that ************. But if you pitch them on their titty, they're going to call them. They're calling. Women love you some all sex. I just started two years ago, man. Eating coochies is hard work, boy. Man, when they push your head all the way down there, boy, and stuff you right there, you fucked up. You fucked up. Don't let them lock that elbow. When they lock it, you can't raise up. You can't. And they lock their thighs on, you can't hear ----. And they be brushing that coochie against your forehead. You be shining like a glazed donut. You can't eat no pussy and you got asthma. This bitch trying to kill me. I'm telling you, man, the first time I did it, my wife locked that elbow and she locked her thigh. I had to hit it outside to get loose, man. What the **** is wrong with you? Bitch trying to kill me. See, now I know what I'm doing. See, now I'm good. You get smothered a couple of times. You'll wake up. You'll learn how to eat some pussy when that mother keeps smothering your ass. See, now I put my arm up in there. She ain't going to smother the **** out of me. When I used to put it now, I put my arm up in there. Look how I put my arm up in there, son of a bitch. I put my arm up in there and I lock it. They can't go nowhere. They be some hollering some of my bitches. You ain't going nowhere, mother ******. Boy, they'll bust their head on the back of their head, boy. Boy, when you eat the pussy like that, they be weak. You know you eat pussy real good. You know how you can tell? Because in the morning, they're going to call you boo. Hey, boo. Good morning, boo. You need to eat that ass up, boy. You need to eat that ass up. But you got to put your arm up in there, boy. They're going to knock your goddamn head. I couldn't help it. I'm telling y'all the truth. They don't need you tripping. Sex is funny. Everybody cool. Everybody put on ass when you're in public. But it's the damn truth. All of us human. That's always showing. Everybody human. You do it. You say it. Preachers do it. Everybody need pussy. Everybody need it. It's a goddamn lie. God looking at you. He look at you. He look at you. He look at you when you say ----. Oh, suck it, baby. Suck it. Oh, put your finger in my ass. Put your finger in my ass. I'm going to show you how sex is so funny. You ever been making love to one woman and she farted? You ain't stopped for ----, did you? You ain't stopped for ----. But as soon as you get in the car, you talk about her ass like a dog. See, Bernie, all right. You stinking ass bitch farted on my dick and ----. What type of ---- is this? It's a mean ************. That's a solid fart to start a fight. When they cut that fart, don't do that bullshit no more around me, man. I'm not bullshit. Stinking ass bastard. You a quitter woman, man. I don't care how fine she is. If she break wind on the first two dates, you got to get to know somebody to take a ---- or fart in front of somebody, man. That's years of hard work. Like y'all tight. Y'all been dating long. Can you cut a fart in front of them? See, y'all ain't got a year. You can cut a fart. See, you the nastiest son of a bitch. You the type of ************ to cut a fart under the cover and then raise it overhead and ----.