Reggie Reg - Denzel Washington - Bad Boys Of Comedy_

What's happening, Brooklyn? Man, man, man, man, I'm a connoisseur, man. I love restaurants, man. But some restaurants, man, just ain't, you know, they not hitting it, man. Like, you ever been to a restaurant where you had to go back and get a change of order? You ever been to a restaurant, you ever done that? I went into one, man, a whole lot of celebrities was in there, man. And they told me, man, the restaurant was owned by Zell. Right? And I didn't know who he was talking about. Zell? What do you mean, Zell? Right? Come to find out that Denzel Washington owned the place. Man, I said, well, Denzel Washington owned this place? Man, if Denzel owned this place, man, tell Denzel to get out of here now because my order messed up. He came at me not like the nice Denzel. He didn't come at me like, you know, John Q or Malcolm X. He came at me raw, like training day. Came out just like this. Uh-huh. Uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh. Which seems to be the problem. The problem is, man, I didn't get no hot sauce and no mild sauce, dog. Can you help me out? You didn't get any hot sauce and mild sauce. Is that what you're telling me? Huh? That's what you're telling me? You didn't get no hot sauce and mild sauce? Mm-hmm. I'll tell you what. Let's see what's in the bag. Oh, ----. My nigga. Uh-huh. You got six pieces of wings. You got fries. You got bread. You got coleslaw. But you don't have no hot sauce and mild sauce, huh? I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to go in the back, all right? I'm going to go in the back. If the receipt says you didn't get any hot sauce and mild sauce, I'm guaranteed to go into my pocket and pay you back your money by dollar. Yeah. That's what I'm going to do. Right, and another big actor was there. I didn't know that was there. Morgan Freeman. He came. He gave the old Joe Clark lean on me speech, right? He came. What seems to be the problem? That's how I go to my office right now. Son, what seems to be the problem? Can't you read the goddamn sign, son? The goddamn sign says hot sauce and mild sauce with your meal, son. Are you trying to pull something, son? I remember you were one of them smart college kids. You used to go back and forth with your history just like you're going right now. You want to come in and jump on everybody because your forefather's been ran and chased by hounds. Well, that might not be living, but it sure as hell ain't buying. Buying is what these folks been doing going on three years. Buying. Buying this. Buying about a thousand. Buying from us, fool. I should know because I'm the one that dropped the grease. I'll be back. I'm standing right there. Him and Denzel get into an argument. I can't. It's just a fantasy. He's like, Denzel, I need to speak to you. About what? Third time this week, Denzel. Somebody came in and steal it. Mr. Sam's, bring all the managers inside, Mr. Sam's. Take the chains out the door. Denzel, Denzel. We're at the end of the partnership, Denzel. Right now. Expeditionally. Come on, Denzel. Pack up and get your stuff out of here. Right now. You want me to leave, homo? You want me to leave just like that? You want me to pack up my stuff and leave? Huh? Yeah. Uh-huh. I train you. See, I train you. Disloyal, fool-ass, bitch-made nigga. That's how they gonna treat you? Yeah. Ah, you motherfuckers. Okay. All right. Uh-huh. I'm putting cases on all you managers, huh? You think you can do that? Yo, come back here. I got your money. You think you can do this to me? You managers will be frying chicken in Pelican Bay when I get finished with you. Yeah. Crisco Oil Program, brother. 23-hour lockdown. You will never see the light of day. Who the **** do you think I am? I'm the one that got this place started. You just got here. That's right, Morgan. I said I'm the one that got the place started. You just got here. Uh-huh. Yeah. My nigga. And Chris Rock was on the fries. He was like, God damn, I can't believe y'all done got rid of motherfucking Denzel Washington. I can't believe it. Bernie, can you believe it? Man, I don't know what the **** is wrong with these motherfuckers. They done lost their motherfucking mind. These motherfuckers want some hot sauce and motherfucking mild sauce. That's my time. Thank you, Brooklyn, New York. Thank you.