Colin Jost Reacts to Trump's 2016 Presidential Run | Late Night Throwback

It's so nice to not have a desk, you know? Yeah, I know. Once you get out from behind the desk, it's really fun. Yeah, people know you have legs. That's great. They know, yeah. Well, that's people, when they see me, they always say I look taller than they think, but that's because they've never seen me standing. They've never seen the lower half. Yeah, they've never seen the lower half of my body. You're double the height I thought you were. You haven't been behind a desk, of course, because it's the summer. No SNL. Yeah. Last show, May. Yeah, last show was May. And so I remember people would ask me this question all the time. Are there news stories that you have been bummed out that you've missed? Well, there's a man that's running for president now. Gotcha. Oh, right. Scott Walker. Yeah. And everyone's talking about the Scott Walker. Donald Trump. Yeah. Fascinating. Here's the thing. Donald Trump, I have to say I have a real affinity for Donald Trump. Yeah, you're pro-Trump. Well, I wouldn't say pro-Trump. You've been a long-time, you would say you're a long-time Trump supporter. I used the word affinity. Yeah, okay. I think I grew up in New York, and I feel like when you grow up in New York, on some level you love Donald Trump. Yeah. I think even when you're like, oh, I hate Trump, you're like, yeah, but you love him. Yeah. And I feel like he's like the New York Post or something. Like, if you don't love the New York Post, why do you live in New York City? Right. Like, there are other cities with regular newspapers. Exactly. But this, we have the Post. And we have Donald Trump. And Donald Trump is, people are like, Trump's an idiot. That's what I keep hearing. Trump's an idiot. And I feel like he, Donald Trump is not an idiot. He's an incredibly smart man. There are no idiot billionaires. Like, no one's like, hey, remember that kid Tommy from growing up? You know, he was kind of slow. What's he doing now? Billionaire. That never happened. But people are upset at Trump because he's a very polarizing guy. But I don't think that's bad. I feel like it's good. There are other good examples of that. I feel like he's a lot like Bane from Batman. You have a real affinity for Bane. Huge affinity for Bane. You know, they both have great voices. Yes. They both dress interestingly. You know? And I feel like Bane made people choose sides. You know, he came to town and he was like, and I'm paraphrasing, but, Gotham, we need to do something about the immigrants. I don't want to put words in Bane's mouth. I think Bane, if Bane was watching right now, he would say, I don't think I ever talked with that little enthusiasm. Well, it's amplified. He has a whole thing in the microphone. And I just feel like that he's making, Donald Trump's making people, in a Bane way, either be like, yeah, we're with Bane, let's burn this place down, or to rally and be like, we need to stop this man. Yeah. And that's a good thing. We need to get the cops out of the sewer where they somehow all got trapped. Exactly. All the police went in the sewer. Are they still there? No, I can't remember. I can't remember. But I do remember they trapped all the cops in the sewer. They said, hey, we're in the sewer. They're like, hey, we're in the sewer. Let's all go. Everyone. Every man. And then one cop was like, oh, I got bad news. You guys got Bane trapped. Also like Bane, Donald Trump will definitely appear at a football game at some point. Yeah. He's got to. He'd like to just walk out for a halftime show. So this is your first year doing Update, right? Yeah. Well, first full year. First full year, right? You did it. And I always thought you'd be a natural for it because you've been doing a lot of on-camera work your whole life. Well, I had some kind of more hard news experience. Yes. Before, earlier in my career. And this was sort of, I remember this was sort of like a crossfire type debate show, would you say? I was on, it was called News and Views, and it was a fairly hard-hitting crossfire style, fairly intense debate show. And you have a clip. And what were you debating? The clip, we were debating a subject called is sports and shopping ruining Sunday family values? Okay. And I should point out that I am the second debater. You're the second debater. So you'll hear Chris Libeto. Okay. You'll hear his stance, and then you'll hear my response. Okay, great. Here we go. Let's take a look. We still spend the day together, go to mass together, and have dinner as a family. But we can also interact at the mall or sports arena, can we not? No, Chris, we cannot. There are no laws about being a family, but I do feel that it is a part of life that we must experience. If we are not together on Sundays, we are missing out on some of the most precious moments of our lives. Where have our values gone when a father is working, a mother is shopping, and the children are at their friends' houses? This may be a typical day, but this is not what Sunday should be about. However, it is what Sundays are becoming, and I, for one, am deeply disappointed. What? The whole time, the whole time I was watching that clip, I was saying, that is a kid who is deeply disappointed. And disappointing. Yeah. And you, uh, and I like that you grew into your head over the years. Your head was the same size then as it is now. You always want to start wide. Yeah, just a big old... And just let it grow. And just let... And then, like, some legs grew out of there, and then... Oh, my God. I love also that they went to us to talk about sports. Yeah. They were like, these two probably know about sports. And I talk about it, I'm like, this is what Sundays are. Like, I've worked a full work week, and I've come back, like, I've gone home, my wife's shopping, Look, you were a tiny, full-grown man. Yeah. That's what I like to think. Wow. So you are from Staten Island. I'm from Staten Island. Proudly from Staten Island. People always ask, are you sure you're from Staten Island? I'm very sure. Very sure. Very happy. You wrote this movie called Staten Island Summer, which is sort of a semi-autobiographical about... Yeah, I grew up on Staten Island, and basically, the only thing I did every summer was, I would swim. I would go to the swim club with all my friends, and that was, like, the community thing you did. And I was a lifeguard there. And I should say, I was a lifeguard with a lot of quotes around guard. Gotcha. I was not... When you work at a swim club, or you work at a pool, you're never... Like, the closest I came was, a kid was standing in three feet of water, and was like, I think I have a cramp. And I was like, oh, my God, are you okay? And he's like, yeah, I'm just gonna swim it off. So you don't guard. So there's lifeguards. There were lifeguards that were all kind of delinquents. And I was a very nerdy lifeguard, because I was also interning... Wait, that kid from the debate? No. This is good. I know, this is the shocker. That kid that should have been the first kid killed in the Godfather. I was re... I was also... I was also interning at Merrill Lynch. Oh, wow. The classic combo of lifeguard, Merrill Lynch intern. So I was sitting in the lifeguard chair, and I would be reading economics textbooks in the chair, which also, they don't encourage reading in general when you're a lifeguard. That's a no-no for lifeguards. That's a no-no. Yeah. So there's lifeguards who are kind of ineffective, and then there were maintenance kids. That was like the divide. There were lifeguards and there were maintenance kids. So lifeguards were kind of like bums. Maintenance kids were psychos. Okay. Full, like... Yes, we had a friend that would, like, take the dead frogs he found in the filter, and he would just fire them out of leaf blowers. Just, like, launch them out of leaf blowers. And then we had... There's, you know, there's a scene from the movie... Imagine if you're a frog and your father passes. Yes. And you're trying to get over it. Yeah. And they're like, where is he? And he goes, he's in the filter. He's in a better place. Yeah. And then you're telling the family and they're just like... I guess they're just like... That was that. And we had a hornet situation. We had a lot of hornets around the swim club when I was a kid, and so the maintenance kids would devise plans to get the hornets. Yeah. And they started very simply. They were like, we'll just put a jar of honey in a tree. Mm-hmm. I don't even know that hornets make honey. And even if they did, they wouldn't go to honey. No. Like, they'd show up and they'd be like, our job is done. We're gonna go elsewhere. Thank you. And they don't eat it. Yeah. They're like, let's go get in here. And so it started that and it would escalate and they would eventually... There were some real, like, flames with a spray can. Uh-huh. Like, things that were, again, very safe, good stuff. And so Fred Armisen in our movie plays one of these maintenance people. And Bobby Moynihan plays a lifeguard. And there was always a lifeguard who you probably know that was there way longer than he should have been. He plays the guy who's like 35 and is still like, this is where I should be. Yes, good. And so this is, we have a scene of the two of them where they are interacting. So this is... Fred has now decided to take it up a notch to deal with the hornets. All right. And he brings some jet fuel. Gotcha. And he explains, right before you see this, he explains that his cousin works for Delta, so he gets free jet fuel. That's his explanation. All right. Let's take a look. Victor. How you doing? Unstoppable. Word. Hey, I just wanted to let you know we're having a staff party this Saturday if you want to come by. Oh, really? You're inviting me? Like, you consider me part of the staff? Yeah. Of course, man. Always. You want me to make anything for the party? You know, I'll do... an ice sculpture. You like an angel? Nah, I think we're good, man, but thank you. Yeah, I want to make you an ice sculpture. Oh, no, you don't have to, man. I think we'll be okay. We're going to have, like, clues and weed and stuff. I'll make you one. We don't need an ice sculpture. It's summer. It'll melt pretty fast. Huh? It's ice, so it'll melt, so we don't... So you want one? No. Yeah. So it's in Staten Island. You actually shoot scenes at your parents' house. Yes. All the interior scenes were shot in my parents' house. And your parents were played by Jim Gaffigan and Kate Walsh. Were they happy with the portrayals? They were incredibly flattered. My mom was like, oh, my God, Kate Walsh. She was so happy, and my dad is a huge Gaffigan fan as a stand-up, so it was like perfect. And my dad was very excited because he was a stand-in, and his arm was used to replace Jim Gaffigan's arm, and he's been pausing it to show all of his friends. You've got to look at the arm. They're here tonight. The Joes are here tonight. Let's say hi to your parents. There they are. Yeah! Your brother Casey, you and your brother Casey play cops in the movie, Staten Island cops. I was going to ask if you felt like the mayor of Staten Island because you were making a movie there, but not compared to your brother, right? No. People would come up to me and be like, oh, my God, are you Colin Joes? And I'd be like, yes. And they're like, do you know Casey Joes? And I'd be like, yes, he's my brother. And they're like, oh, my God, can you introduce me? And I was like, no, we're on bad terms. And so I feel like the order is like Pete Davidson first, obviously. Right, S&L's Pete Davidson. Then Casey Joes, then Colin Joes. I also will say, because it's semi-autographic, the kid they got to play you really looks like a young Colin Joes. That's fantastic. I will take it. I'm not very biased. I was saying that I would have said, I thought he looked like a young Colin Joes until I saw the video. The video evidence. Yeah, he needs like a way worse suit and a floral tie. This is Graham Phillips. He's heartbroken to see the dude he was actually playing. It's like his eyebrows are separated. Why would you do that?