Teaching Your Kids to Pray

Vague prayers don't do anything for anyone. You pray vague prayers, you're going to live on a winner. Thank you for saying that. You're welcome. I thought you might like that, baby. There are so many vague prayers in life. Episode 17. Yes. Yeah. Lots happens. Is there a burning question? There is a burning question. Laura Hall would like to know, Lisa Bevere, how do you do ministry, especially if it involves travel or danger, perhaps both at the same time? While also- Are you making fun? Is that true? Perhaps both at the same time was added. Travel or danger. I think it should say travel and or danger. While also meeting the needs of your family. And Laura Hall asked that question. She said that at the beginning. Thank you, Laura. Triple mention now. Laura Hall. We can pronounce your name. We're going to keep saying her name. Our last episode, I couldn't pronounce that name. I didn't want to butcher it. You know, like people always butcher our name, right? You just say it with confidence and the only person who knows that you butchered it is the person whose name. Yep. Right. That's true. You just have to say it. John Bevere. They say Bevere with such conviction. Okay. So, back to the question, how do you do ministry when travel and danger meet the needs of your family? Well, I am a big believer that the right thing in the wrong season is the wrong thing. So, when my children were little, I did not leave for more than just Friday night. So, I would fly out on Friday, come back on Saturday. Sometimes John would fly out Saturday, come back on Monday. Most of the time I flew out on Saturday. So, we always had, I remember, we always had boys night on Friday night. Don't you remember? When you became more popular, you started traveling more. But there was that, no, no, you had man night. I appreciate it. But there was that tension of you don't want to be negligent with your family to speak in an event. And so, as far as danger, listen, anytime there's travel, there's danger nowadays. But as someone who enjoys an element of danger, that was never a problem for me. But yeah, I feel like they have to say stewardship of your children is a higher priority than traveling right now. And a lot of people, they assume I was leaving a lot more than I did. Because I do think that even if I traveled three times a month, that only meant three nights away per month. So, I don't know. Okay, but I've got to answer from my perspective, because I traveled quite a bit when the kids were young. So, from my perspective- It just said Lisa answer, that's why I did it. Oh, well, I'm going to answer. So- Both are valuable. Laura gets a double answer. My concern was my kids were going to end up wayward, away from God. And the Lord spoke to me one day and he said, in your obedience to me, your children will be protected. So I knew that, and it was, I mean, Lisa made the decision to stay home until they'd gotten to their high school years. I knew I had to travel. And yet- And both of those were obedient. Because we were both obedient to God, our children were protected. I really believe that. So, that would be my answer. No. That's a good answer. Yeah. For them to know what obedience looks like in that season. So, seeking out the heart of God in that moment and trusting God to fill the holes on whatever side. And that was back in the day when you did Sunday morning through Wednesday night. Wow. So, when I first started traveling, I'd go to one church, Sunday morning through Wednesday night. Saturday night. No, I'd do Sunday morning, Sunday night, Monday night, Tuesday night, Wednesday night. And I'd come home Thursday- Yeah. Do laundry. Usually leave Saturday again. So, I was gone a lot. That is a lot. Yeah. It was a whole lot. But that was- I never did that. That was what we did back in those days. I mean, this is- You couldn't speak on the phone. This is almost 40, well, it's 35 years ago. That's what we did 35 years ago. That's a long time. Yeah. So, as crazy as that schedule was. And I remember one day, a friend of mine looked at me and he said, John, I'm watching God do just as much by doing Sunday through Tuesday night. So, I changed it and I started doing Sunday through Tuesday night. That's it. And he gave me Thursday and Friday with my family. But no, look at our sons. They're amazing. They love God with all their heart and they're just doing things better than Lisa and I did it. And so, obedience is protection. Yeah. And you made it their obedience also. Yes. That was- Which I think, I know we've said that on the podcast before, that you brought them into your- John would always come home and share what happened in the meetings. I did. They weren't really interested in the women's meetings. I did. Sure. Well, when we got a little older, we were interested in what was happening at the women's meeting. I do remember someone asking to come to a women's meeting. I was in Austin, Texas one time. Absolutely. Yeah. Hey, guys, I'm going to interrupt. I'm going to hijack this conversation. We have something important to talk about here. Well, this was it. This is really important. Oh my gosh, Laura, this was it. But I don't want to take away from the importance of where we're going because- And you're seeking God. We're talking about Addison's new book. How do you seek God? What does that look like? What is God's word on travel? Wow. Are we really doing this again? I feel like y'all awkwardly throw it to me. You know what? No, Addison, I want you to talk to us because you whet my appetite on our last podcast when you said that the Lord's Prayer is not an outline. It's more of a guideline. It's not a formula. It's an outline. It's a framework. It's not a formula. Please, I'm very excited to hear about this. And everybody, this is the new book that just came out by Addison Bevere called Words With God. Subtitle? Trading boring empty prayer for real connection. Yes. So you just got everybody's connection with that subtitle. There it is. And I want to hear about this. So we have a lot of people ask us, how do we train our kids to pray? How do we teach them to pray? How does prayer become a part of their lives? And I think one of the most important things that we teach our kids is that prayer extends beyond that motion of prayer as you're putting them down to bed at night or the motion of prayer around the dinner table. It extends into every part of their lives. We want to teach our kids to see God in the work of God, to live with a God consciousness that moves into their schools and their friend groups and their activities, whatever it is. That's what it is for us to mature and grow our kids in prayer. What's interesting to me is the Lord's Prayer gives us all of that with the framework, not the formula, the framework of the Lord's Prayer. See, we've turned it into a formula. I think it's like 52 words that we pray, we kind of run through and then we move on to the next thing. But what Jesus gives us, which it really is a gift, what he gives us with the Lord's Prayer is an understanding of how the gospel works. So, Tertullian actually said that the entire gospel is summed up in the Lord's Prayer. So, I want to look at this and for those of you who have been praying it, maybe you grew up Catholic, maybe you grew up in a church experience where this prayer feels rote or it's synonymous with meaningless repetition. I just ask you to take a deep breath, take a step back and look at it with fresh eyes because I think you're going to see something different. So, first of all, I want to point out that Jesus tells us to go into our room, shut the door, right? So, we're praying by ourself in this scenario, but then how does he teach us to pray? Our Father, not my Father. So, even though he says, hey, don't make a show. Not even your Father. He says, hey, don't make a show of your prayers because that's the context here. It's like, hey, don't make a show, at least in Matthew's telling of this, Matthew 6. It's don't make a show of this. Go into your room and pray our Father. So, it's not my Father. I'm praying in the company of people. See, we make so much about the spiritual life. We make it about us individually. What I need to do, my cares, my concerns. And God is teaching us right from the beginning to enter his presence with an hour orientation because it actually opens our eyes to the largeness of what's around us because so much of life and the meaning of life happens at the intersection of relationship. So, right from the beginning, our Father in heaven. Wait, can you say right there, that mindset would stop the division? Yes. Our Father. It answers diversity. It creates inclusion. It's amazing. Our Father. Not my Father. Our Father. Going back to what we talked about last episode, we have to wrestle with this idea of God that's a God that's bigger than the projection of myself. We have this tendency to create God in our own image and then worship a God that really is just a reflection of what we like best about ourselves. It's like, no, I need to wrestle with this idea of God and the beauty of God and the plan of God beyond just me. So, we're two words into it. Our Father, the significance of Father in Greek and Aramaic, it actually begins with Father. So, our is a modifier that follows Father. But the idea of Father, this is the orientation. This is the one who we pray to. Our Father, who is in the heavens. It's actually not heaven. It's heavens, which essentially is communicating there's nowhere where you are not Lord. He transcends all realms. He transcends all realms, all dimensions, all space. That's really what's being communicated here. There's a largeness in that. There is. And there's a reason why this is where we start with our prayers. Let's continue. Hallowed be your name. Or holy be your name. So, I love this. Right here in the first two lines, we have tender Father and holy God. Right there. So, when we pray, we have to bring both of those to the center of our prayer. So, you know, in the original language, it actually means your name is to be kept holy. So, going to that, if you study the idea of the name of God, which we don't have time to do this. I do write about this in the book, though. But if you study the idea of the name of God and how that shapes our prayers, why we pray in the name. So, the last chapter in the book is actually called The Name. So, what does it mean to pray in the name? Well, this is the truth of God. God's name is an unfolding certainty. It's an unfolding certainty. It unfolds. We need to understand that. There are layers, there are dimensions to God's name. Do you want to hear something amazing? He didn't reveal himself as Yahweh to Abraham. He actually said to Moses, I didn't reveal my name to your fathers as I am now revealing it to you. My name is, I am Yahweh. So, you want to know why he does that? So, I do write about this in the book. I'm not trying to like, ****. But Moses says to him, Elohim. He addresses him as Elohim. And then he says, it translates like, what is your name? But what he's really asking is who are you? Or what substance are you? What are you made of? So, it's not the pronoun that we would use for name in Hebrew. It's actually describing the essence of who he is. And he says, I am what I am. Or I will be what I will be. And then we see all throughout the Old Testament. We see these different dimensions of Yahweh become real. And the story, the unfolding certainty of his promise, of his covenant, of his goodness. Anyway, we're kind of getting sidetracked. But all of that, all of that is captured in the Hallowed be your name. All of that. Okay, so two lines into it. Your kingdom come, your will be done. So, we have a tendency when it comes to prayer to make whatever it is bigger than the good work that God is doing. So, your kingdom come, your will be done. It's a surrender, not my kingdom, not my will, but your kingdom and your will. And we can pray that under the banner of the largeness and the beauty and the reach of who God is. But also the tenderness and the eminence and the closeness that he is as father. So, you're seeing how this all comes together. Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Now, give us this day our daily bread. This is a really fun one. Give us this day our daily bread. I think it's fascinating that we're instructed to ask for something as simple as bread. See, for them, bread was the utensil that they would use to eat the food. We're talking about the most basic thing. And I want to pause here and talk about asking. Because I feel like when it comes to training our kids to pray, we shy away from asking God. Because we've seen this handled poorly. We've seen people use the ask dimension of prayer to manipulate God. Or manifest. Or it's like we glorify the stuff, whatever it is. And that's what we plat for. I asked for this and God did this. And it doesn't feel right. And I know for me, I grew up next to some church camps that didn't do that well. That put a lot of emphasis on the asking. And I would say the ask and what they got received more glory than actually God in some of those moments. At least that's how I perceived it. And so I started to shy away from asking God for stuff. Unless it was super holy or for someone else. I was like, I shouldn't really bring this to God. And I noticed that my prayer life started to shrivel up when I did that. And we had just moved into our first house at the time. And we were house poor. And I really wanted to buy a lawnmower. We had a tiny patch of grass. And I really wanted to buy a lawnmower. But we didn't even have a sofa. We didn't have window treatments. And we lived in Colorado at the time. And you don't need it. It was February. You don't really need it. And I remember I still went to Lowe's. And I was just walking around looking at the lawnmowers. Just being like, I want a lawnmower. These things are amazing. I'd never owned one before. And I just really wanted one. They were parading their power and their glory. And I was walking down the aisle. And out of nowhere, y'all, out of nowhere, I heard the Spirit of God say, ask me for a lawnmower. And y'all, that's not me. Y'all know me. I'm not the kind of person who asks for things. I'm really bad at asking for things. There's certain things you've inherited from me. I'm sorry. And so I kind of wrestled with that. I was like, wait. And then finally I asked. I said, okay, like God, would you please give me a lawnmower? So I left Lowe's. Three days later, two or three days later, I get a call from a friend who's moving across the country. He goes, hey. And I didn't talk to this guy in over a year. He's like, hey, I'm moving across the country. I was going to sell my lawnmower on Craigslist. I've only used it two times. And I just felt like I was supposed to call you and offer it to you. Do you want my lawnmower? And I was like, wait, how much do you want to sell it to me for? He's like, oh, no, no, I just want to give it to you. And in that moment, y'all, it became so real to me, so real to me that asking in prayer, even something as simple as daily bread or a lawnmower is an important part of the transition from the lofty, like what we've been talking about, God's kingdom and all that, and the material moving into our everyday lives. He wants to be involved. With the daily bread. And that completely changed my life. And James says that we have not because we ask not. And I think we also are unaware of what we have because we haven't learned to ask. And what did Jesus say? No, wait, what did Jesus say? Ask that my Father might be glorified. He said about yourself being glorified. When we ask, the Father is glorified. Hold it. He's ready. And I love how the book of Jeremiah says before we even ask, God has answered. But the truth is we can't recognize his answer when we don't ask. So then we begin to acknowledge his involvement in every portion of our lives. So the way I put it is we ask to become aware. It's like when we start asking, we start becoming aware of the providence and the goodness that sustains us. Even something as seemingly insignificant as bread at that time. Like the daily bread was the basic. Does that make sense? And I was talking with a friend about this. Even though we're promised in Psalms that those that fear the Lord will not lack any bread, he still says ask. So I want to go back to the one that just rivets me in my thought life is the church that we don't ever want to be accused of in revelations of being the Laodicean church. The indifferent, lazy church. What was the thing that Jesus said to them? You say I need nothing. Okay, stop and think about that. The curse of needing nothing. The curse of independence. The curse of being independent. I'm assuming everything I get I should get because I'm entitled. God feeds the sinners he'll feed me. God clothes the sinners he'll clothe me. I'm entitled. Instead of acknowledging my need. Which is interesting how that transitions into the next line about forgiveness. Dad, what you're saying about that entitlement, I need nothing actually sets us up where we don't extend forgiveness because we're not recognizing our need for forgiveness. That thought actually extends into the next instruction. I want to go back to this because you hear this, do I just pray God's will or do I go to God and I specifically ask for things? Which one is it? What I would tell people is vague prayers don't do anything for anyone. You pray vague prayers you're going to be unaware what he's doing with that vague prayer. Going back to this idea of words with God, we want to open the conversation. We want to see how all the points are connecting in our lives so we invite people into the conversation and we speak on behalf of God. Which is a beautiful invitation that we're told we get to know his voice and we get to participate in the good news, the message of reconciliation that is being extended to the world in the most everyday mundane parts of our lives. Dad, I think you're going to like this mom, I think you're going to like this too. I was wrestling with this question, it's a good question, do we just pray God your will be done or do we go after specific items? God took me to Jesus' most intense moment in prayer, which is the moment in the garden. And I noticed that there are three dimensions to Jesus' prayer. They all start with S, so they're easy to remember. And y'all, these are things that you want to teach your kids and these are things you want to embody in your own prayer life. Three things. Number one, Jesus was specific. He was specific. He said, if there is another way, he wasn't like vague. He was like, if there's another way, please let it be that. Let this cut past. Like, let me go. He wasn't vague. He was specific. The second thing is he was steadfast. He prayed again and again and again and again. He kept going back for hours. He was praying. He was contending to the point where blood was coming out of his pores. Right. And the third S word, he was surrendered. He was surrendered. Not my will, but yours be done. So a healthy prayer life when it comes to asking, when it comes to going to the father requires us to be specific, steadfast and surrendered. If we embody those three really good prayers. Like if you if you teach your kids specific, steadfast and surrender and going back to what we showed the last episode, the steadfastness prepares us to receive the request. It prepares the capacity for us to receive what we're asking for. And that's God's faithfulness in his goodness. And that's that's just how he works. And some of y'all might be like, but I'm scared of asking for the wrong thing. Like, what if I am specific and it's wrong? Right. OK, we have this promise. It's here in Matthew six. It's in Luke 11. If we ask for a stone, but we think we're asking for bread, the father is not going to give us a stone. Yeah. If we think we're asking for fish, we're actually asking for a serpent. He's not going to give us a serpent. He's going to give good things to us. And what an amazing promise. And James says, if you don't receive, it's because you ask amiss. God's like, don't worry, I won't give it to you. It's not wrong. And you said specific and surrendered. So those are coupled. Yes. Yeah. It's not specific or surrendered. So I hope I hope y'all are seeing as you're teaching your kids to pray, each one of these lines you can personalize and customize for your kid and what they're navigating that day, what y'all are navigating as a family. Just don't just run through these like stop what I do when I'm using the Lord's prayer as a framework because I'll stop and I'll pray into what does it mean for me today to contend for daily bread? Like what does that look like for me? Addison today to contend for daily bread and then moving on forgiveness reconciliation. It's the heart of the gospel. I'm going to I think we've yeah, we don't have a ton of time. No, no. Take the time. It's because all of that is dependent on this. It is. Yes. And I think I think it's healthy for us to notice the sequence here too. Yes. Most people when they start praying, where do they start? Me. No, just think about what they're praying for. What are they when when most people really read God daily bread trials, right? Like I need rescue rescue. Yeah. Resource rescue. We start wisdom. Yeah. In the second half of the prayer. Not the first half of the prayer. And Jesus is teaching us. Actually, if you pray this right by the time you get to the point, we're navigating daily bread puts it in forgiveness and trials. Yeah. And temptation and evil. It's it's now in perspective. Yeah. Which is even like you're bolstering your own spirit. God is. Yes. Like yeah. Remember this is who God is. Yes. The big picture here to put everything else into context. So forgive us. Give us a stare daily bread and forgive us our debts as we also have forgiven our debtors and I want to focus on this next line because you do such a good job talking about forgiveness and reconciliation and the bait of Satan. So so good and lead us not into temptation. Now, this is a line in the Lord's prayer that messes with a lot of people because they don't actually understand what Jesus is praying here. What he's teaching us to pray and there's a couple things I want to call number one temptation and trial an exact same Greek word so you can translate it either way we could this could be lead us not into trial. Okay, just just to be clear, but the Greek word here in two is is the important Greek word for us to pay attention to what it conveys is that the temptation or the trial is not our final destination. Oh, I see. So when he sent teaching us lead us not into temptation what he's teaching us to pray and declare don't leave me there. It's like a it's a declaration because y'all we're going to go through temptations and trials. This is not true. This is not hate help me avoid temptations and trials and God may get through this looks like me avoiding it. It's actually a declaration that God will take us through the temptation and trial and the temptation or trial will not be the final destination. Yeah, which I just I love I love that. I love that promise the faithfulness and the goodness of God that he will take us through and because of that because we know that is the case. We can pray but deliver us from evil and so 52 words or whatever it is very short. But if y'all use that with your children teaching them how to pray this prayer gives them so much insight into the character of God and into how we're supposed to engage with each other how we're supposed to navigate hardship and trial and concern and temptation that we face and whatever season we're in and that's where we are formed. It's like a mark for in the parable of the sower the sun rises for the sake of the seed like yes, it will scorch some of the seeds but it rises for the sake of the seed the seed doesn't grow without the sun rising right like that is that's the trial the trial is the sun rising like it's hot. It's intense. There's there's you know, there's heat. That's a part of life refinement. It's refining and and when we understand like this is how we're to make sense of our lives and prayer it opens up every part of our life. I love this. Well Addison, I think everybody wants to get the whole this book does listening to us. So tell us how to get it. Yeah. I mean it's available really wherever people get their books books audiobook ebook physical book and then the Spanish book actually is out to it came out April 18. So the book came out April 18th 2023 and yeah, they can go is there Addison Devere comm or is it messenger international dot-com? They can go to Amazon to get the book. But if they want to learn more about what we're talking about they can go to words with God.org to okay. Good. Yeah, we're good with God. So you've given people all kinds of options to be able to go and get it. But the big thing is get it and read it. Yeah, and so Addison, thank you for sharing with us and I believe if parents teach their children this I you know with the with the depth of clarity and the you you created hunger and all of us, you know that that's what I looked for is as you shared you created hunger in me to even tune up and areas that I see in me that have become weak in my prayer life mom. So wow, I believe this book is going to help people to do that. So and I just want to say proud of you to the parents out there. I'm just going to challenge you to replay this podcast around your kitchen table. Yeah, talk to your children about what does that look like the specific the steadfast and the surrendered and ask them. What are you wrestling with right now and just go around the table and take those things to prayer and I'm so excited that you have written this book because I believe this book is a tool and I believe that parents need it in their hands, but these need to be conversations around the table. And so we're just so honored that you would invite us into your home and listen to at home with the beers and thank you for sharing words with God. Thank you. So good dad. You want to pray us out? Yes Heavenly Father our father in heaven. We're so grateful for what you've given to us through your servant and Lord God. I just asked it as people read this book that their prayer life will Lord go to a place of richness. Yes and fulfillment and father. We just thank you so very much for the families the people that are listening right now. We just pray your will into their life. We speak your will a provision of protection of security and safety into their lives and may your presence manifest upon their family upon their lives in Jesus mighty name. Amen. Hey guys. Thank you so much for joining us again at home with the beers where we are so passionate about helping you create a legacy starting at home. If you haven't already go right ahead and like and subscribe and guys as well leave us a comment below because whenever you leave a comment helps us curate content that can help so many other people again guys. Thank you so much for joining and we'll see you next time at home with the beers.