My Boyfriend Got Me Pregnant Again And Left

Brought to you by the EveryDollar app. Start budgeting for free today. I've had a very stressful past week. I found out that I was pregnant with my second child, and my partner was just not ready to take on that responsibility, so he left. The good news is that I don't really have much debt. I just have a car payment. Now I'm just confused on where to go from here. I started out with your debt snowball, and since I only have one thing, I was ready to attack it, pay $1,600 a month extra, and wipe it out by the end of this year. But now, since the baby's coming, I don't know what to do. Do I still do that? Do I save for the baby? What do I do at this point? I'm sorry, kiddo. How old are you? 32. So I feel like I'm too old to be having these problems. Who's the dad of the other kid? Same guy? Yeah. I'm sorry? Yes. So you have two children with the guy that left? Well, yes. One, and then one baking in the oven. That's what I mean. Okay. I count baking. Okay. All right. What do you make? After taxes with no side hustles, it's $4,500 a month that I take home by myself. I started listening to your show a few months ago, so I started doing side hustles. Now I bring around like $5,500 home. I just don't know if that's sustainable long-term as the pregnancy gets further. No, it won't be. It won't be. That's not reasonable. You've got to take care of you and the baby as you progress in the early stages. You've got to work around maybe morning sickness or something, but you can work for a while longer, but then you're going to run into this. So no, what we teach folks to do when you have a baby on the way or you're facing some kind of a storm of some kind is stop the baby steps, stop your debt snowball, and pile up cash. So I want you to stack cash. I want you to get the biggest possible pile of cash you can get between now and baby. Treat it like you're paying off debt. Okay. You got, have you got health insurance? Yes. Okay. All right. So can you save $2,000 a month? You definitely, I can definitely do that. What could you save? What's the most you could save? With the side hustle, I think maybe like 2,800. Okay. I'm going to call it 3000 for five months. That's 15 grand. Yeah. And then it slows down to maybe a thousand a month as you reach towards the delivery date. Okay. So maybe you're going to have between 15 and $20,000 piled in an account. That gives me a lot more peace for you delivering this baby with a smile. Okay. Yeah. Have you got health insurance? Yes. Good. Okay. So you need to contact them and find out what your out of pocket is going to be for labor and delivery with your health insurance policy. And with appointments, OB appointments and everything. Yeah. Yeah. The whole thing. I want you to, I want you to have a baby budget. Okay. To get ready for that part of it. So here's the, here's what happens at the end of this story. And it's going to be a great story. At the end of the story, you come home with a brand new beautiful baby and you've got 15 or $20,000 in the bank. You write a check and pay off your debts and you finish, you start your baby steps again and you build your emergency fund. And now you're a mama bear against the world. And you're going to be one of those warrior princesses that goes and makes things happen as a single mom. You're a hero. You suck at picking men, but you're a hero. But you picked him. Yeah. I mean, he's awful. Oh my gosh. And besides that, I don't know the, I don't know the laws in Ohio, but most States have a law that if you make a baby, you get to help pay for it, men. And so I'm going to go ahead and contact human services in your area and find out what we can do to get this deadbeat jerk to start writing checks for these two children. How old, how old's your first one? He's 12 now. He's 12 years old. You've been with this guy 12 years. 14 years. Man, you're hot. That's, that's a, that's a grief in and of itself is a relationship. I mean, that's a, that's a divorce. So did he mention the fact that he needs to start writing checks to you for kids? Well, he asked me how much money I want. I'll tell you how much money I want. I want a third of your salary. To be honest, I, all of my emotions, because this has been so shocking because I had an IUD, so I wasn't planning for this. All of my emotions have just been spent on like surviving and not dealing. At some point in this process, he gets to be the financial daddy, whether he wanted to be or not, because that's what the law says. And I don't know what child support ratios are in your state, but you need to find that piece of information out. And you need to let him know that that piece of information is coming his way. Yeah. Cause I mean, if he, if he started writing you a check right now for three grand a month, wouldn't make me mad. It helps these numbers, right? It does. It definitely does. And how much responsibility? So I'm leaving tough buddy. You made a baby. The law says you've got responsibility. That's how this works. Do you have a good support system around you? Do you have family or anyone? Um, I have a church that I started going to, and then I also have like international students group that I volunteer at. And while they're like little kids, they, they're like, they feel like family. Yeah. Now I want you to go sit down with your pastor at the new church and with, uh, no shame say this is where I am. And, uh, I just want to let you know, I'm here trying to learn about God and learn about and start my life fresh spiritually, because this is a new church to me. And I, and I've got these, this situation with these two kids and I'm by myself and see if, and I think you'll see if it's a decent church. And it probably is. You're going to see some wonderful people start putting their arms around you in a lot of different ways, but they won't do that. If you don't tell them, okay. They're not mind readers. I know you're going to be okay. As a matter of fact, you're going to be better than if this hadn't happened. You're going to be okay. You're stronger than you think you are right now. Yeah. You're at, you're at the bottom of it emotionally, right. From a, from a relationship breakup, the news of a pregnant, I mean, you're, yeah, you're at the it's, it's exhausting. I can only imagine. So it goes up from here. It really does. Um, but yeah, man, we, we run into single moms all the time on the show and it is, it is incredible, incredible what they do when they rise to the occasion. And you're going to be that you're a great mom already. I mean, you have a, you have a 12 year old. So, um, man, we were cheering for you. I did want to ask from a financial standpoint, how much do you have left on your car to pay off? You said it's your only debt. Yeah. So I have 14,000. Oh, perfect. Okay. That's great. Yeah. Cause to the number, like a big lump sum in it. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. I want you to pile up cash. I know, but that was two months ago. Yes, she already did it. She already did it. Oh, you already put a lump sum on it. Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you said you want to. Yeah. No, no, no. So yeah, but, but to the numbers earlier, Joey, you could see that. Yeah. I mean, by the time baby comes and when you come home, everything's good. You'll have this car paid off. Yeah. When baby comes home and you're healthy and the baby's healthy and there's no problems and you don't need this money for anything, you write a check and pay off the car that day you're free. So you don't really lose any ground net net on your get out of debt plan. Okay. We're just, we're just doing the, we're just doing the hokey pokey a little bit. We're setting it to the side and then we're going to put the right foot in and the left foot in. Right. Okay. Thank you both. Hey, Joey, listen, if you need us, we're here. You call anytime. Okay, kid. Okay. We got you. You call that pastor today. You call human services and find out what your rights are on child support. Those are two calls you make today and you start stacking cash, stacking cash, stacking cash. You're going to be fine. You're, you're, you're a lot stronger than your voice sounds right now. I can tell. Create your free every dollar budget today. The simplest way to budget for your life.