4 Ways We Can Respond After the Election – Talk with Dr. Rick Hanson

I offer these every week along with a guided meditation just click the uh subscribe link below to be notified through YouTube when I post the latest recording or if you'd like to join us live which would be great uh just go into the description section below and follow the link along to be able to sign up for free so the context for me here is that in America as you probably know how we had an election and the results of that election is best we can gather are about 51.7% nearly 52% and the votes are still being counted of American voters have reelected Donald Trump and many people are celebrating that Victory a a majority clearly of American voters and many others including me are not celebrating that um we can accept the results of an election which I certainly do I accept that Donald Trump will become the next American president my next American president and um we can accept that while still being concerned and I'm going to speak to those of us who have concerns if you don't have concerns that's okay you might be interested in applying this material to other areas of your life where you do have concerns or you might U find use here for friends and family who do have concerns you don't share their concerns but you can be concerned that they're concerned because you care about them and have compassion uh and so you might find you know some value here uh if none of that speaks to you there's really no need to stick around uh and definitely no need to you know to send me an angry email uh complaining that I've um been dealing with this topic tonight okay here we go I have four major headlines here and they come from my own practice uh the first of them is to strengthen the heart you know when it feels like the bottom has fallen out at least that's how you experience it even if the person sitting next to you is really happy but for you the bottom has fallen out and we begin with our own experience always and when that happens turn to the heart turn to the heart um for starters be kind to yourself especially if you feel that the world is letting you down if you're if you feel that others who have decision-making power in a democracy have let you down uh it's especially important to stand up for yourself be for yourself let yourself feel what you're feeling that's always primary absolutely primary um but you can still be on your own side feel what you're feeling take your time with it be loyal to yourself you know it's really important it's certainly recommended in so many Traditions to find and stay in touch with as much as you can a sense of your own deep down innate worth as a being simply by virtue of being you know I see a tree there and I go what a beautiful tree there it is uh it's worthy and yeah there are a thousand or million other trees and still that tree has its own place its own time uh its own efforts to come into being to continue to be beautiful tree good tree well we can feel that way about ourselves also protect your heart it's really important to keep attention especially these days away from what are toxic influences for you it's one thing to uh give the world sort of the minimal necessary amount of attention to you know feel like you know what's happening fundamentally and I'll speak to that in a bit but you you know speaking for myself certainly I just started observing that I'd be reading stuff in my favorite political Twitter feed and essentially it was all the same statements of outrage and um analytics about this or that and hoay for our team okay I got it but after the hundredth or thousandth time of that I just don't need to engage that anymore so be careful guard your own sense doors as the Buddha taught long ago for me one of the most useful personal statements of the Buddha it's best we know that have come down to us across 25 centuries all kinds of painful thoughts and feelings can move through awareness but we don't have to let them invade the mind and remain so as I said a moment ago guard the sense doors you know what are you listening to what are you seeing what are you watching this does not mean a spiritual Bypass or overlooking what's problematic it means finding that sweet spot for you including watching your own tendency to ruminate protect your heart protect yourself also of course try to keep your heart open love your friends and family and love our big beautiful precious world love heals and feeds us whether it is flowing in or flowing out this is one of the most important findings in science in the last 10 years corroborating what's been well known throughout Traditions around the world including in the Indigenous traditions of native people love heals us and feeds us whether it is flowing in or flowing out there may well be a lack understandably of care and support and appreciation and kindness for you uh the the rougher your current conditions the more the world is letting you down and kicking you in the teeth the more helpful it is to you in your own self-interest to find ways to experience compassion and kindness friendliness and love authentically as it's available to you for those for whom you can feel that um it's good for you to do that uh meanwhile with others who are draining or upsetting or otherwise you have compassion for them while stepping back or standing up for yourself uh it's been remarkable for me personally to appreciate the fact that uh for people who upset me and I'm outraged by and I have moral judgment about and there's no escaping from moral judgment um I find for myself that I feel better me when I have compassion for their suffering compassion is not agreement it's not approval it is not waving your rights it is not knuckling under not being a doormat not being a pushover we can be very strong while simultaneously looking over there at that person being aware of some of the many causes and conditions that are leading them to make the choices they're making um and deep down continuing to wish them well while opposing them fiercely that's possible it's really possible uh routinely recommended by the great teachers you know I and I take some guidance from them as well as my own direct experience see for yourself finally this is something that's been very real for me recently we are all wounded no one makes it out of this life without injury that's a fact um that's not a way of saying boo yaah let's all be wounded and let's all wound each other no there are enough natural wounds that are coming our way uh and in the lives of some people there's a lot of wounding vastly more than I've experienced myself if you're like me people have let you down and if you've had it worse than me maybe people have let you down traumatically and horribly cruy and viciously maybe you've been attacked you know horribly in various ways also in addition to those kind of wounds we all make mistakes and carry the wounds of regret and remorse and we've all had losses we all will have losses such as doors closing loved ones dying or the loss uh dashed hopes um for a better future so we can be honest about our wounds we're not trying to bypass them and we can feel them alongside love this is remarkable try it carry your wounds Into Love Take Your Wounds into love see what that feels like find what is authentic for you related to my words find your own words and I think what you will discover is that as you carry your wounds into love that the wounds soften and become more bearable you're not denying them you're carrying them into something bigger and as we carry our wounds into love we open out into a field of Love while still being wounded with an open heart for others who are wounded as well okay um next big suggestion See Clearly recognize what is not clear seeeing at least as far as you know recognize deliberate lying recognize deliberate misinformation or disinformation um recognize people who think nothing of L through their teeth if their lips are moving they're lying to you uh recognize this it's not that hard it's actually pretty easy to get basic factual information from Wikipedia or university websites and credible news organizations that correct their errors sure be open to Alternative points of view but you know gradually over time see what you can trust recognize the facts that are relevant to to you right close at hand how are the people doing that you care about what's really come forward for me you know in the last 12 hours is a recommitting and a reintensification of my commitment to other people see how they're doing right many people um you know everybody has a secret struggle I think I don't care what your position in society is in your own way and many people are carrying much bigger loads than I am and um it's really a good thing to be aware of how they're doing also how are you doing you know when Things Fall Apart in the outer world it's especially important to take a look at how you're doing over here how's your health how are your finances you know how's your well-being um what's what's good for you seeing clearly there and farther a field are actual harms truly heading your way right as Maya Angelou has said when people show you who they are uh believe them the first time now I'm going to exercise my privilege here as the leader of this event and offer a fact statement that I believe is clearly factual uh certainly I and many others have underestimated the movement toward authoritarianism in America over the last 40 years accelerate ating really over the last 10 and in addition to that underestimating I and many others have overestimated the guard rails against that movement toward authoritarianism that's my personal view you might disagree if my personal view is accurate let's not make those mistakes any longer it's a plain fact not alarmism that America is already several steps down the well-worn path historically toward tyranny many people many great historians who know much more about this than myself such as an applebomb and Timothy Snider have a lot of wonderful and accessible material that you might be interested in in terms of seeing clearly we do not know their timing and shape but we do know that storms are coming so be prepared and in my third headline here do what you can I feel so touched by uh niosi Johnson uh this little boy born in South Africa 1989 born with HIV who acquired AIDS and in his lifetime which lasted 12 years uh he became an advocate for people with HIV AIDS and especially children and he became a national figure in South Africa uh in the piece that I sent out um I have the Wikipedia link to his entry and to slightly paraphrase something he once said as he put it do all that you can with what you've been given in the place where you are in the time that you have and I just feel if that little boy can see can be that courageous and that wise and that large-hearted you know I have no excuse not to do what I can with what I've been given which is a lot and in the place where I am and with the time that I have and may that be an inspiration and perhaps even a standard and an encouragement uh for others as well so the more uncertain and potentially threatening The Wider world the more important it is to do what you can and invest in yourself and in the circle around you what feeds you maybe it's time to up your game in self-care what do you see out in the world that um you love to see beauty art music perennial wisdom um I'm very fond of uh many videos on YouTube My tastes are fairly eclectic you know from rock climbing videos to San Francisco 49ers highlights to good music to um weird quantum physics to um gosh you know trailers for movies and all the rest probably a lot more weird stuff too anyway um what you know what feeds you meditation uh certainly feeds me I remember uh father um Thomas King uh the founder and certainly the popularizer of um it's going to come to me in a second prayer centering prayer there we go I heard him give a talk once and he said you know a life without contemplative practice is a sure prescription for disaster all right so anyway what feeds you you know what protects you what makes you happy it's boring but true we get back what we put in to our diet to our exercise and other physical activities and to our meditation and other inner practices also in terms of do what you can in times that at least for many people seem very alarming um I remember seeing this YouTube video because I have a little bit of a one are we going to do if it really gets crazy as it occasionally has historically um I remember seeing this YouTube clip of this big Burly kind of grim you know blunt former US military Special Forces uh expert on Survival okay and he was asked you know if uh when the old meal hits the fan under the worst circumstances you know what's the most important thing to have and I was thinking he would answer stuff like a certain rifle or crossbow or bomb shelter and his one-word answer simply was friends that's the most important thing to have so this is the time to really talk with people and listen you know a lot of shouting at each other can we listen I don't mean knuckling under and you know getting all caught up in bridging differences with people who have no interest in um traffic flowing both ways uh and you know friends family those you can relate to younger people maybe who haven't yet formed their you know mind um listen talk deepen friendships take care of those who are close to you you know be loving find common ground and ask yourself okay in the time that you do have what could be deepened or even repaired in important relationships out in the world out in the world pick the causes you care about and support them whatever Rings true for you uh I have myself founded the global compassion Coalition I put my heart into it a lot of time in the last several years couple of years um I remember uh being um having the opportunity to be with a US Congress person uh shortly after the 2016 election uh I'll protect that person's privacy and I happen to be in a lucked into a small group of people uh right after um Hillary Clinton lost that election and Donald Trump won in 2016 and we were all kind of alarmed given our views not everyone would agree with those views in any case we asked that person what do you recommend and they said something I've never forgotten they said send money to lawyers in other words send money to public interest legal firms that can uh slow down bad things and maybe even prevent them alog together that's one example it's up to you it's up to you and again this is in a context in which you you're concerned about where things are going um your petitions your signatures um your money may not make a discernable difference out there in the world but they will definitely make a discernable difference for you so that's my third major headline do what you can do what you can and then finally find peace find peace um throughout history most people have lived under really tough conditions while still as much as they can you know a peasant in what is now Romania in Central Europe or in China a thousand years ago or anywhere else in the world Africa you know people living in really tough conditions uh people living under the thumb or the boot of some autocrat some King some warlord occasionally a queen um they found ways not perfectly I'm not trying to minimize the horror show when it was that I'm just trying to say it for me at least it helps me find peace and perspective to realize that uh many many many many many many people have found a way to make a good enough life under really difficult conditions and if they could do it we can too uh it's helpful to also appreciate in terms of finding peace that actually most things are out of our control I look at current political events um in light of 300,000 years of existence as a human species only roughly 3% of which the last 10,000 years have been in larger population groups eventually cities and now 8 billion people on planet Earth that um you know are completely historically unprecedented compared to the small groups of 40 to 50 people that we evolved to spend our lives with in which it was impossible to have a a warlord inside the band yeah against other bands sure but inside the band no it wasn't possible it wasn't possible for rumors to spread deliberately inside the band um our Fates were bound together and there were the three these three conditions objectively inside the bands common truth common welfare and common Justice the way we live for the last 10,000 years including the last 10 are a complete aberration from the biological template of common truth common welfare and common Justice the conditions for which have just been blown up over the last 10,000 years including the last 10 so that's the world in which we live we have to do what we can with it but those are some of the causes and conditions that have had a role in the most recent political events you know in the world and you know it's simply a fact that you know I live in a country in which gosh something like 150 million people vote I get one vote [Laughter] whoa I can't make them you know vote my way um even if I could I'm I'm not sure I would try because of the deeper issues with that so you know there's a kind of peacefulness in recognizing that we can do all that we can to water the fruit tree but we cannot make it give us an apple we can tend to the causes but we cannot control the results and there's a lot of uncertainty and there's a lot of not knowing and peace comes from accepting this fact while doing all that we can to see clearly and to take effective action accepting uncertainty and not knowing specifically what brings you to peace a couple people noted that I made a reference to the fact that raising the Gaze to the Horizon and also by the way getting a sense of things as a whole is neurologically calming uh you can read more about why that is in my book neurod Derma I think it's the chapter on opening into oldness chapter eight and um I'll leave it at that it's also true that as we exhale slowly that engages the parasympathetic branch of the nervous system you know that is soothing and calming and brings us to peace tuning into the internal Sensations in your body interception neurologically engages the insula which acts like a circuit breaker reducing activity in the default mode network of the brain which is the F the neurological basis for the inner ruminator or simulator what's going on in the simulator inside right because what's going on there gets gradually reinforced in your brain since neurons that fire together can wire together as well especially if they're negatively biased so you know look for what brings you to peace uh neurolog ically I think it's also really important to look around and you can do it right now and see so many things that are unaffected by the latest political ups and downs trees reach for the sky birds fly friends cook dinner together people laugh children you know have a sense of wonder uh love keeps flowing um turn toward what is reliable um you might say that the central Arc of the Buddhist Life as a great teacher and see for yourself what speaks to you the central Arc of his own Journey was toward what is an increasingly reliable and ultimately unconditioned not subject to rising and passing away neither born nor passing away um an increasingly reliable basis for the ultimate lasting happiness so in our own life we can look for what is reliable turn toward whatever for you are reliable sources of well-being and comfort and wisdom you know uh the taste of a chocolate or a banana uh that look in your dog's eyes who wants to go for a walk with you uh the you know comfort in a hug the kindness of a friend um deep teachings from the wisdom Traditions around the world for me uh I really appreciate the onward developments of science uh you know and also just that wild random Beauty all around us sometimes you know like the Shimmer of a rainbow in a bit of you know oil sitting in a in a puddle uh next to your home um look for what gives you comfort also in your mind as I finish here is the ongoing stability that's inherently untroubled of awareness itself trouble passes through awareness trouble sometimes passes through my awareness but awareness itself is always untroubled just like um the screen of a television or a monitor of some kind itself is not affected or Changed by what passes through it by what it represents right to paraphrase pemin you are the sky everything else is just the weather and even more deeply uh if you look there is a fundamental Stillness in your own ground of being you might have gotten in touch with a bit of that in our meditation here slow down be gentle with yourself and you can usually find this this inner quiet between and beneath the busy thoughts and feelings and desires that fundamental Stillness which for me in in in my experience and my view reaches mysteriously into a kind of fundamental Stillness in the ground of reality altogether um a Timeless vastness in which conditioned reality unfolds um if you look you can find that Stillness in your own being inherently in your own being um around which activity and noise proceeds but Stillness itself is uh that inner peace is um you unmade by you and cannot be destroyed by you right it's never lost but it is often found uh infused with love that peacefulness is our true home it's a reliable refuge and a source of strength under all conditions uh including sometimes an unreliable and scary world to finish your own practice your own efforts will help many others beside yourself they do Ripple out into the world they do touch the lives of others they do spread in ways known and unknown seen and unseen including touching my own life as well so truly from my heart I thank you I thank you for your practice your your attention your efforts over time your own good heart and your sincere it uh and good faith including how you are in this Gathering truly thank you so I'm going to speak to some of the things that have most come in and you might be able to see them in the chat so 19 minutes past the hour Tes rites and I'll use your name if you use your name if you chat me privately I won't use your name so Teresa rites speaking I think for many many people I'm surprised by the extent of my sadness I thought I was prepared to brace for this but far from it I feel unconsolable and Restless very restless absolutely fundamental to any kind of wise practice with the mind is being able to be with what is there now we may need to work with the mind to grow inner resources like perspective and resilience and what's called distress tolerance and self- soothing and self-compassion and other things things to be able to be with what's there but most fundamentally we be with what's there we allow the sadness we allow brokenheartedness and whatever is real for you whatever is real for you that person next to you who voted differently may not be experiencing that and it doesn't matter because what they're experiencing has a kind of validity for them and what you're experiencing has a validity for you so we make room for it we let it flow um maybe we touch it and we move on myself um I feel deeply connected to both the people in my country and the people in the world as well as a sense of creatures altogether and I'm deeply concerned about the impact on them most of whom are much more vulnerable and living with much more precariousness than I do I'm really concerned about them and um you know I have to take breaks from that alarm I have to take breaks from you know a moral View and take a breath and watch a cat video or something you know or just get something done like the dishes so it's okay to take breaks you know we empty the bucket of Tears one spoonful at a time but it's really important to include and to feel what we feel and then to notice what is also true I have a kind of simple three-step you know practice I do which is to deal with the bad I don't necessarily mean it morally I mean deal with what's difficult deal with what hurts deal with what where the pain is deal with the bad um including conditions you're trying to improve and turn to the good not to avoid the bad but if anything to help you cope with it more effectively turn to what is also true that is nurturing reassuring and a minimum neutral hopefully positive turn to the good and then third take in the good let those experiences reverberate in your mind for a breath or longer so they have a chance to hardwire into your brain take in the good to grow the good that lasts inside right turn deal with the bad turn to the good take in the good again and again and again okay uh practices of many many kinds work for different people um you know I know something about the underlying why but you know of some of them but I won't go into those details here so chanting things like Namo renio uh in pure land practice like Jennifer talks about at 19 minutes past the hour Mo many many kinds of chanting uh and many many kinds of traditions I still remember doing the firew walk with Tony Robbins back in 1982 I don't know maybe roughly and saying Cool Moss Cool Moss Cool Moss while I walked across the red hot coals uh you know so find what works for you okay I find um that there really is a place for being civil while also having self-respect and speaking with moral confidence and gravity they're many people in the world who are models of that um I like the way Kyle Shanahan talks after a game in which the 49ers have lost uh at football team uh you know he carries a certain weight he's telling what's true uh he's not pulling his punches but he's also not adding a lot of Top Spin to it there's a way there's a way to do that I'll tell you a little thing here um I was recently on a retreat in the kind of in the mountain in Utah Southern Utah and uh I would often look around and I can do that now where I am and I'll see trees that that were planted from a seed well before I was born and that will live well after my lifespan and there's something about all that that gives me Comfort I mean my heart does ache for what factually human activity particularly with greenhouse gases is doing to this planet my heart aches and I know that Earth will endure personally I think our species uh you know it's more likely to be roughly in the midpoint of its 300,000 years so far ultimate lifespan than toward the end um that doesn't mean I'm at all happy about the terrible consequences and centuries ahead uh you know but I myself get Comfort by a sense of our little precious Planet you know is a blue green marble in the sky and it's a big big universe life's been cooking away here on Earth for well over three and a half billion years and that kind of stuff gives me personally a sense of perspective while also going to bed every day usually with a sense of wasn't perfect but pretty good you know made efforts brought the heart to it and learned along the way and I think those are the big three in my view that we can judge ourselves by each day and find comfort in you know did you bring your heart to it reasonably you know maybe some room for improvement tomorrow did you bring your heart to it did you try again not white knuckling or sweat popping out of your forehead but did you hang in there did you put in a good day's work given the amount of energy you and health you actually have what's really true for you you know an honorable amount of effort uh including toward other people and did you learn something did you repair something did you heal something did you realize something did you grow in some way um wholeheartedness efforts and learning someone asked me a question and I think is really in the minds of many people and it's relevant for me with some of my relatives who I like as people uh who believe things that I'm very clear are absolutely untrue and uh are deeply invested in um paths that I find morally abhorent and they probably look at me much the same way so what do we do first of all it's it's not necessary to go for the absolute extreme and then judge yourself because you're not there you know in Buddhism you may be familiar especially in um Southeast Asian Buddhism there's there are these meditative practices in which we deliberately cultivate compassion and kindness for others and it's in a kind of a a s it's in a it's in a it's on a range right so often it starts with oneself although sometimes we do that one last because that's the hardest of all but let's say you start with yourself and then you choose some someone that you really really like and appreciate a so-called benefactor then you move on to a friend you know could be a partner could be a neighbor you like then you move on to someone who's neutral you don't have strong feelings either way and then finally fifth you get to a difficult person and typically you start with a easy difficult person like you know a friend you might be kind of annoying and then you just work up the ladder a lot of times people choose PE uh others who are at the very top of the range of difficulty and then go ah how do I do this no start small and build from there it's a little bit like learning to swim start in the shallow end and then work your way into the deeper end of the pool and I find myself what it helps is that we don't have to love so-called U the actions or the parts of that person that for example get pleasure from hurting others we don't have to quote unquote love those part Hearts but still can we look past them to see suffering there can we look past them to see the little child uh deep inside everyone you may have to look for a very very little child to find that but can we do that and I for me that's helpful uh including staying aware of the ways in which it helps me not be so stressed or upset by that other person okay