4 Reasons Why Asian Parents Don't Support Artistic Careers

Yeah, everybody can do it and be just like me. But the truth is, man, not everybody's built like everybody. Wow. I don't know. David's dropping some truth balls. There's this viral Asian parent. TikTok is emotional. But you let me know what you think. I'm in the post production track. I stay in a room and edit. I'll figure it out. Where the f*** is the straw? I can't even drink this. Welcome, everybody, to the Hot Pop Boys. David and Andrew here. Wow, David, we just witnessed a girl get roasted by her parents for wanting to pursue her dreams. Oh, man, that video has everything. You know, Confucian Asian parent dynamic, roasting, crying, a straw, there's chopsticks in it. Man, it just reminds a lot of people of a version of a conversation they've had with their parents, maybe minus the insults or with the insults. It must be relatable because a video does not get 12 million views without being relatable. Like that's the definition of how videos go viral. People want to share it. They want to send it to people in their circle. And I'll tell you this. I think the Caitlyn boy has probably the most viral Asian-American TikTok of 2022. Wow. That's a big statement. You're giving her the award right now. That's it. We're handing it out. But what I do want to talk about is that there's actually a lot of layers to this. And if you look at the rest of Caitlyn's TikToks, I think there's something else that you can draw from this. So what we're going to do is analyze her TikTok, but also as people who have taken a risky career path, we got some advice for people like Caitlyn as well. Well, there was such a huge range of responses, both on TikTok, on Facebook, subtle Asian traits, et cetera, et cetera. Next Shark covered it. There were so many different outlets that ended up covering Caitlyn Boy's TikTok. And you should see, Andrew, there was like a pretty wide range of opinions. Like some people are obviously in support of her chase your dreams. Man, your parents are toxic. Being Asian is toxic. Everything to like your Asian parents are literally just being mathematically logical. The arts does have a low rate of financial success to man. You're demanding a straw later, swearing at your parents. This is ridiculous. Like everybody went through this. Suck it up. You young Asian kids are so soft and all valid points. Yeah, I actually think that all these points could be true at the same time. All right. So a couple of things that I noticed, one of them was in the video, both people are talking to each other kind of disrespectfully. Obviously, the parents are going hard, kind of insulting her. She tries to make a joke about being a rich husband, and then her mom just shuts that down real quick. But also she's kind of swearing not at her parents, but, you know, in the conversation, too, right? Not everybody. And I know the younger generation is growing up in a more relaxed environment, is allowed to use the F word in the presence of their parents. I know we are not. Here's another thing, David. I felt like Caitlyn, to be honest, was not taking this conversation about her future very seriously because she was filming it without her parents knowing, and then she's like talking about like jamming a straw into her drink and she is sobbing. But it just didn't seem like she was actually trying to take it seriously. I think that pissed off her mom more. Yeah, I felt like the mom was probably like unaware of what TikTok is. And then she was putting on a little bit of a show. It doesn't change the dynamics being relatable. But yeah, like. She kind of got them. Yeah, and I will say this, guys, in a later follow up TikTok, the TikTok that Caitlyn made after this TikTok, it actually reveals that her parents are really supportive of her career. The mom was just really mad at the answers that Caitlyn was giving and the lack of plans that she had for herself. I think that for me, you know, shout out to Caitlyn for getting the hit. I hope that this is actually the thing that's able to propel her to becoming a pro TikToker, YouTuber, video editor, entertainment personality, writer, whatever she wants to do in this space. Use that viral 12 million hit video as a springboard. However, I thought that the reactions from the Asian-American community were really telling everything down to like, you know, the people who really made it and switched careers from like STEM careers to like creative careers being like, yeah, go for it. Remember, all you young Asian kids are smart, brave and courageous and capable. And that's actually the part that I was kind of like, whoa, whoa, whoa. Who said that's true for everybody? That sounds like a PR statement from somebody who made the sacrifices or had advantages or was ultra smart and successful. Then just telling everybody, yeah, everybody can do it and be just like me. But the truth is, man, not everybody's built like everybody. Wow, I don't know. It's dropping some truth, but there's no guarantee that Caitlin Boy even herself. And by the way, I hope that she does will make it in the arts. Not everybody will. All right. Because it's true that STEM careers have more general pathways to becoming like, let's say, for example, a millionaire than the pathways in the arts. Let me tell you, especially depending on which like lane of art you pick. Let me tell you this, guys. I know a lot of Asian parents out there like to gamble. And when you gamble or bet, you're just playing the odds. And Asian parents for their kids, they're just playing the odds. They're just like, what are the odds that that's going to work out? They're like, what are the odds that you're going to become this? What are the odds? They just want to know the odds, to be fair. In defense of the kids, which is like our position or Caitlin's position, the parents, sometimes when it comes to entertainment, the arts, they don't know the odds, they just know the odds are low. It's true, but they don't actually have a statistical accurate read on each like director versus illustrator versus, you know, YouTuber versus TikToker. I mean, I think it's safe to say that they, for the most part, Asian parents of this generation do not understand the industry. But anyways, guys, let's go into some advice, because we get asked this question actually at a lot of colleges and just people come up to us. And on the street, they ask us this question, say, hey, like, what do you what do your parents think about this? Or how do you convince your parents that you want to take a riskier pathway in entertainment? Like, how do you get their support? Yeah, actually, I think we've been asked that at every single college we ever gave a talk to. So real quick, I think the number one point to our previous point, there's a good chance that your parents don't understand your passions or hobbies or your hobbies would be professions. Right. You want to mean the hobbies that you want to turn in the profession? Listen, I know the digital media economy is growing. That's a new thing. That's literally a thing that popped up 12 years ago. So, yes, most traditional Asian parents, especially from certain background, they have no idea what that means. They don't know what it means to be a video editor. They don't know what it means to be a professional influencer or TikTok or content creator. They just don't get it. OK, and they barely understand the entertainment industry. So listen, that's just at a baseline. Just kind of expect that from your parents. And I do think that probably a lot of them think that maybe like only white people have those jobs. Yes. Obviously, they don't know any Asians from the previous generation. They have those jobs. Obviously, nowadays, you can show them a bunch of different examples and show them that the market for Asian faces is growing and all that. This and that. But by by and large, just they don't get it. They probably don't get it right. Point number two, your parents generally just want what's best for you in their eyes and the best means financial stability first, then happiness second. This is true, actually, for almost all immigrant parents, not just limited to the Asian diaspora. Yeah. No, I mean, I think a lot of parents look at it like, hey, listen, we cross the Pacific Ocean on a boat and we saw a bunch of, you know, we have some bad memories from whatever happened back there. And we just want you guys to be very financially stable here. That's all we want in the video. She clearly says, hey, how are you going to support your family with this? And Caitlin doesn't have an answer. So, of course, the mom gets more concerned. And that is also fair for the parent to do that. Yeah. And I think that the key is for Caitlin in that situation, she has two options. This is point number three. She can either one do the work in a very calculated way to convince her parents. Right. That would be like getting an editing award at her college or winning best editor in her like video editor program, getting an internship at a prestigious house like Disney or something like that. That's like pretty much showing proof of work to your parents to get them off your back or just editing a project. Maybe it's like about the Vietnamese refugee experience. That's, you know, a piece that they might understand. And they're like, oh, I see the value in what you do. You edited this. You put this story. You're talking about something that like relates to the immediate community or even editing a prestigious person within the community's wedding. But they that prestigious person was like, oh, man, you did the best job editing my wedding that I'd ever seen. Obviously, you have a second option within point number three, which is like to just not even care. Yo, just pursue your career with or without the support of your parents, because it is on you to convince your parents to support you. It is not on them. That is your responsibility. However, if you want to just pursue it without them. So be it. Be independent. Yeah, I think that I'm not a big fan of people like judging all old school Asian parents as toxic. I'm not saying it's definitely ideal. You know, you wish the parents could be like maybe they had a relative that works at Disney or works in entertainment, works at illustration, works as a professional flutist or, you know, whatever you want to do like. But they just don't. So, I mean, they're just giving you the best advice based off their perspective. I think the key is you have to eat the good parts of the watermelon and spit out the seeds or, you know, just eat your way around like a banana that has some good spots and has some bad spots. Hey, here's a little secret people out there. You can actually kind of trick your parents with a half ass, but well-explained plan. Like, I'm not saying you can fully trick your parents, but I'm saying if you lay out a plan for them and even if it's not the best plan, but it sounds good, you might be able to convince them. So at least come up with a plan, because at least at the end of the day, the parents just want to know you thought about it. Because at the end of the day, guys, your greatest struggle or your greatest like dragon that you need to slay metaphorically is going to be having a successful career. It's not going to be convincing your parents. I guarantee you that once you have a relatively within a reasonable range of outcome, a successful career in your chosen creative field, your parents approval will be there. It may not be there as much as your brother or sister who became a doctor or whatever, et cetera, et cetera. Obviously depends on how good of a doctor they become. But it will you will at least get a satisfactory level of approval. Would you agree with that? I think so. I people are always like too worried about like, well, you know, I got to this level in the creative world and my parents were still more proud of my sister that became a doctor. So what did you do to live your life to be the more valued sibling? That I hate when I see that, because I'm like, you're not you're not even going to be good in the creative field. You think like that? I think at the end of the day, man, everybody's parents are different. Some people's parents tend to be more prestige minded. Some people are money minded. Some people are a mixture of both. I'll tell you this, man. I grew up with some people, you know, just in the community that make a lot of income right now, possibly doing something that would not be viewed as highly legal. OK, so it depends. Like, are their parents going to judge them off the fact that they're doing something that the law might not like? Or are they going to judge them off the fact that they're like really, really financially stable? Another secret. If you're going in the creative field and you do something that your parents understand, you know, probably more specifically doing something for your immediate ethnicity or community that they understand and where their friends will also talk to them about you, then they will value that. Those are points that that doesn't necessarily mean financial success. But get in the Asian newspaper, get in the Vietnamese paper, get in the Chinese paper, get in the Korean paper, get in the Taiwanese paper. Whatever it is, you get in the paper and your parents will care. Bottom line, though, guys, I don't think there's a clear cut answer. There were people on social media that were saying, oh, my gosh, I was in the same situation as Caitlyn. And I wish that I would have followed my dreams regardless, because now I'm an unhappy like tax auditor and I never wanted this for myself. And now I'm miserable and printing blue balls in my day. You know, nonstop hard drive is full, filled with regret. Caitlyn, pursue that career for all of us who couldn't. Right. That's fair. Cheer her on. No, I'm cheering Caitlyn on. I'm cheering everybody on. I actually to close it up, I support everybody in pursuing a more risky career that they are passionate about. I support that. But with the caveat that you've got to show the work, you've got to show the work and you've got to do the work. So don't just pursue your dreams, pursue your passion, because if it's your passion, you're going to put in the work. Right. So shout out to Caitlyn. I think the spotlight, you know, you know, you got it for the moment. And I think you highlighted a lot of things that a lot of people saw in themselves or the stories of their siblings and their cousins and stuff like that. So that's what like relatable TikTok content is all about. You know, man, we talk about TikTok a lot. TikTok, TikTok, TikTok. It's the wave. You guys, thank you so much for watching. Let us know in the comments down below what you think about this whole dynamic. Did you want to pursue a career and did you have a similar conversation with your parents or do you think her parents were just going O.D., way too mean? I mean, I don't know. I think there's different perspectives. But you let us know in the comments down below. Please hit that like button. We are the Hot Pop Boys. And until next time we out. Peace.