Tam Sao Thất Bản (Message/Information Distortion)

Today, I want to share with you a topic called 3-star failure. Why do I want to use that name? Because it is a problem that is happening every day in our real life. I'm sure you've heard the words like Oh my god, this girl is like that. She's like this, she's like that. Oh, she's so boring. What's wrong with her? And this company, oh, I heard that she's greedy. And she treats her employees badly. And she's blah, blah, blah. I'm sure you've heard those kinds of words. But when you ask again, How do you know? How do you know? They're usually confused when they get that question. And I usually get the answer Oh, because I heard that my sister or my sister's friend did it there. And they experienced meeting that person and talking about that person like that. Do you see that person talking to you? In fact, they haven't experienced that problem. But they say that they have experienced it. That's right. And I'm usually very annoyed. I'm very annoyed when I hear the answer as if I haven't experienced it but I heard it from someone else. That's why I said that today's podcast episode is called 3-star failure. Because I realized one thing. Most of our lives and most of the people I've met especially when I was still in Vietnam I saw this as a kind of culture. Everyone in your life, from your family to your neighbors, friends around you, I see that up to 80-90% they all have a mindset to listen to what others say and then they determine that it is right. Then they go and say it again as if they have experienced it. And when we ask them if there is any evidence they are confused about that. I see that this is a culture that we should change. Especially in our daily lives there are too many fake information from AI and all the information is mixed up. So we should I think I want to use this word to be responsible for my words. Because I see that not everyone out there will have a mindset to defend themselves or a mindset to ask where did you get this information from? How do you know? Most of them only listen to you and then pass it on to others. And I think this is very harmful. If each of us learns to be responsible for what we say I believe that the outside world will be more peaceful and we will be able to connect with each other more easily. Because you can imagine if a thought is said like that you will be affected immediately. And not everyone has a conscious and neutral mind to be able to recognize that this is just a word from that person's point of view and I still want to experience this person. Not everyone has such a mindset. And I often see that when we hear those things we will immediately have a prejudice and a negative feeling about that person. And it will prevent us from being able to connect with each other. And in fact, we don't know if that person is bad or not. And you also know that in life, there are people who don't like others so they will say bad things but it doesn't mean that person is not good to you. And the experience of each person is very different. It is not necessarily the experience of that person. The feeling of this person is not necessarily the feeling of that person. Each of our contact with someone is just an exposure to their mood. Not all of them and not all of them. So we have to be very careful with what we hear And I want to emphasize that we have to be responsible for what we say because if we like what we say and we keep doing that I think it's too messy. And if only each of us is aware to be responsible for what we say and what we hear and have a mind to clarify or re-establish the information that we hear then I think it will be very good and it will be very useful and prevent problems from happening problems that can cause consequences from such things. There is another kind of motive that I also realized when you ask people about a problem they immediately affirm and say that it is like that but when I ask again they say they think it is like that and I see but the fact that you or she think it is like that is different from the fact that you and she affirm that it is like that it makes the listener think that you read it from somewhere and you have a source of inspiration I met a lot of friends in my life not only do I have a kind of I often ask again I am a person who needs evidence and I am not used to just listening and not finding the source of confirmation actually sometimes I ask them where did you read and hear this because I am a person if I just listen to someone then I can't remember my brain can't absorb that knowledge but I have to go back and observe read and find that source then I feel relieved and I feel confident to accept that information so that later I can tell others but if I just listen from that person then I will feel that there is something that I can't absorb so there are times when I ask someone for information or in a conversation and they give very affirmative and confident answers it sounds like they have evidence but when I ask again where did you get this information how do you know then they are like I think so because the thing that they can easily say like it's right I feel like it's like a culture in Vietnam I see everyone talking to each other like that and I think this is something that I really need to change I think especially in the young generation we really need to change this because if you say you think it's just your thought but it's not the truth then I recommend to myself that information that I just heard and I haven't checked and if someone asks me I will tell them I heard it from this person but this information I haven't checked and I recommend them to research more and I don't have much knowledge about this topic and what I know is that when I talk about something I am confident then I can confirm that I read this book and that book so I give them a chance to research more it's not like I like to give facts and I can make up a story I won't do that and I am like that and I also realize in Vietnamese culture we often talk like that so when I ask people will be uncomfortable and I was misunderstood by my close friend why do you always ask like that we didn't understand each other so I thought I had something against my friend I had something wrong with my friend but later I realized I just wanted to ask to know I wasn't trying to offend my friend so I thought if my friend can think like that then there must be a lot of people feel uncomfortable because it's their culture they are used to it when you ask like that it's no different than you but for me I really like the questions why do I know that because I am sure I just look at the problem from both sides between me and my friend because when I am sure about something like you have a show and you prepare questions that you can ask and you understand clearly you feel excited when you are asked and you answer it but if you are not sure about what you are doing or what you are saying then your question makes you confused and it hits your weak point so I realized the difference between the person who has a show and the person who talks about facts so I want to share this problem because I really hope especially the young generation and the people the people not limited by any preconceived notions or words of anyone and everyone will have a habit of looking for information rather than just listening to some information and not even knowing if it's right or wrong So I hope that in this podcast I say that, it's not to make anyone feel offended I say that, it's not to attack anyone I'm just sharing my thoughts about this issue because I've seen its damage and I see that if this story continues like this it will make us lose our minds and it's very hard to develop Because when I talk to Westerners they are always very clear about what I think is what I think There's no such thing as what I think and what I say is what it is I'm sure and I affirm that it is And what they know they will say that they know it from somewhere And I feel that when I live abroad I feel like I'm a normal person And when I'm in Vietnam people think that I'm weird why do I have to ask such questions But when I'm abroad they are all like that and so am I and I feel normal and I don't get judged when I ask a question Sometimes I just ask simply but how do I know that? It also makes others uncomfortable And here I see that they never have a problem with such questions and they rarely ask about it because they are very careful and they say it very clearly from my colleagues I hear it from my husband from a friend They are very clear in deducing information and I really like that So I hope that in an integrated world we should learn to ask and change our way of thinking as well as learn in the West I see it very clearly and honestly as well as don't manipulate information as well as don't manipulate information as well as don't manipulate information as well as don't manipulate information The way we manipulate information is also a way of manipulating our information So I hope in this podcast I have brought my sharing and I hope everyone will see it as a sharing and no one will feel that I was attacked or take it personally Thank you for listening to my podcast