DoctorOz: The Ashley Madison Effect: Pastor's Family Opens Up On Tragic Loss

We begin with the deadly Ashley Madison effect. It's the hacking scandal rocking America. Exposing people who allegedly visited Ashley Madison, the website for cheaters. Putting an unwanted spotlight on the husbands of reality stars like Snooki and Kristen Tateman of Real Housewives of New York City. Professional athletes, politicians, CEOs, and tens of millions of others. Reportedly 32 million. That's the number of users publicly outed on Ashley Madison. The fallout has been devastating. It's called the Ashley Madison effect. Marriages ripped open, trust broken, and even health compromised. Interrupted sleep, increased stress, and now suicide. Pastor John Gibson took his life when his secret was exposed. Found by his wife just six days after the Ashley Madison website was hacked. He was my dad. He was my hero. Gibson, a father of two, preacher, and professor, was loved by everyone in the community. Even though he wasn't perfect, says his son Trey. My dad was a great man. He was a great man with struggles. Everyone has struggles. Everyone is broken. When the pastor's suicide note was found, the family's worst fear was realized in just two words. Ashley Madison. Gibson's wife thinks guilt and fear of losing his job drove her husband to the unthinkable. Today, Pastor Gibson's family is speaking out for the first time to share their memories and to make sure this tragedy doesn't happen to anyone else. Kristen, I'm sorry for your loss. Thank you. And I know it's difficult. It's a private tragedy. It's become pretty public. Are you holding up okay? I am. Getting through it. Getting through it. One step at a time. The man you loved, the man you were married to for 29 years, tell us about him. He was, I think the first thing you're ever going to hear to describe him is that he was a servant. He had such a servant's heart. He loved to do for everyone. He had a corny, quirky sense of humor, laughed at life, kept us all laughing, was a good friend. Take me back to the day when you found him. It was Monday, actually, three weeks ago. And I came home from work, and I was running a little late, and we had plans for supper that night. And so when I walked in the house, there were a few clues to the manner in which he killed himself. So I began to look for him around the house and eventually found him, and he was gone. He had been gone probably for several hours, and there was no CPR, nothing, because he was just very, very clearly gone. I immediately pulled out my cell phone and called my best friend who lives down the street. And she came, and we called the emergency services, and the house began to fill up with friends. And it was a pretty tough day. Did it ever cross your mind he might take his life? I don't know that it ever did, seriously. There were times probably through the years that he would jokingly say that we would be better off without him in kind of a half-joking way. But I don't know that I ever seriously contemplated that he would. And I know he left a note, and this is sensitive, so you say what you are comfortable saying. But he outlined some of why he was doing what he was doing. He basically, it was a very brief note, and he basically said that he had struggled with depression, and that he had been on the Ashley Madison website, and that he was so very sorry. And that was really about it, a few instructions for how to handle his death. And that was really it. So he mentioned the Ashley Madison website. He did. Do you think he was fearful of losing his job as a pastor? I think quite naturally he would be. He very much loved his job. He very much loved ministering to people, ministering to students. He never wanted to be anything but a pastor and a professor. And, of course, being on a website for infidelity doesn't go with that. And so, of course, I think the minute the leak happened, he had to be afraid that his name was there and that this would threaten everything. Do you think he was worried about losing you? I had forgiven him in the past. This is not a first-time struggle. I had forgiven other things. And I hope that he would have known that we could work on it together. I had told him over the years that I wanted to work on this with him. I hope that he would have known that. But it may have been there. There may have been some fear of that as well. Let me ask Trey a question. Christie's and John's son, Trey, is here. Trey, I heard you speaking at the memorial service, the burial perhaps. Your father was obviously in great pain as he was going through this. If you could talk to him in those darkest moments, what would you have said? He was my dad, and so I would have said that nothing would have been too bad, that we would have ever stopped being his kids, that we would have ever stopped loving him, that it wouldn't have been easy, but we would have made it through that. So I would have loved to make sure that he understood that. Christie, what would you have told John at his darkest moment? I would have said, please, can we work on this together? I would have said that nothing was worth losing him for. He was too important to us. He left a hole. And, yeah, it would have been hard. It would have been hard to deal with the aftermath of all of this happening. But we could have done it. Anything in life that's worth doing is hard. If John had confessed to you about his Ashley Madison involvement, do you think this would have been avoided? Yes, I do. I think this outcome would have been avoided. I think it would have been hard. Like I said, I'd forgiven him before. I think I would have forgiven him again. I've been forgiven much. I certainly have my own faults. We all do our own struggles. I think we could have worked on it together if he would have let us. What do you have to say to the hackers whose actions led to your husband's suicide? I would say to the hackers that I know that they feel like they did a good and right thing by outing this. I guess they do. I guess that was their motivation. I don't really know. But there is nothing good or right about rejoicing in the downfall of another person. And so I would say look to your own life and deal with what is right and good in your life and maybe your own struggles and your own difficulties that you're dealing with. And we all fall short of what we need to be. How are you doing? How do you stay strong? I tell you, it's the community. The Christian community that is surrounding me, my family, my faith community. My son and I have talked about it several times that we can almost physically feel the arms of others united and holding us up. That we know we don't have any strength in and of ourselves. We feel very weak. We are absolutely exhausted. And the emotional swings. One day we're dealing with anger. One we're dealing with just the greatest sorrow that we could ever imagine. And we're doing all this. We're talking about what we're doing. So we're doing it all in the public eye. And we have an incredible community of faith that are praying for us, sending us words of encouragement. My phone blows up every morning with texts of scriptures and praise songs and just things to encourage me. We're going to have millions of people praying with you as well today. I wish you the best. I know how difficult this must be. Thank you for watching. Don't forget to subscribe and turn on notifications so you never miss out on new videos to live the good life.