Somehow Pam Bondi’s the Biggest Boob of the Week

American boots are about to hit the ground in Iran. New York and California corruption goes all the way to the top. And Pam Bondi is fired. But how is the Dow doing? That and more on this week's America Uncovered headlines. Welcome to America Uncovered, I'm Chris Chappell. It's been a rough couple of weeks, full of anxiety and uncertainty, but I'm relieved to announce that the national nightmare is over. The lines at the airport are back to normal! So now you have no excuse for missing your second cousin's destination wedding in Sicily. Um, could the TSA maybe go on strike or something? At least until mid-April. Well, flying got a little less annoying for most. It's about to get a whole lot more annoying for some, because Florida is going to rename the Palm Beach airport after Trump. Besides the honor of having the airport near Mar-a-Lago named after him, no word on if they'll also preserve his legacy by making it socially acceptable while in the Trump airport to call flight attendants toots. Pretty rough, but not as bad as a potential future Joe Biden airport in Delaware that would let you sniff the inside of the flight attendants' hats. But having an airport named after him isn't the only way Florida is honoring the president. Trump shared renderings of his future presidential library, which will be a massive skyscraper in Miami. Ironic, having potentially the biggest library for a president that famously doesn't read. Although notably, I don't see any books. And if that's not odd enough, the treasurer's signature will be removed from the US currency and replaced with Trump's signature. This is the first time a sitting president's signature will be on US legal tender. Unless, of course, you count George W. Bush writing in crayon on a dollar, W is here. Trump is everywhere. Even more everywhere than usual. I feel like we're a few months away from an augmented reality program that changes everyone's face into Trump's, and living like we're in the movie Being Don Malkovich. And now it's time for another edition of Really California, Really? And New York! According to a copy of a search warrant obtained by the Associated Press, federal prosecutors are probing whether a New York City council member and her sister, who was an aide to New York Governor Kathy Hochul, took bribes to help a migrant shelter provider. The allegation is that the sisters, Farrah and Debbie Lewis, took kickbacks in exchange for providing the shelter provider over a dozen contracts to provide shelters for an influx of illegal immigrants and homeless. But hey, glad that helped clear the streets of New York of homeless and illegal immigrants, right? Money well spent? Of course it couldn't have been that much money. It's not like these sisters were all that high up in the government. What's that Shelley? Over 200 million dollars! I can't imagine why Mayor Mondami is dealing with a budget issue. Meanwhile, California is dealing with alleged corruption of their own. Well, more corruption. The former head of the San Francisco Human Rights Commission is facing felony charges for using millions of dollars of taxpayer money on luxury travel, UCLA tuition for her son, parties, and her live-in partner's non-profits. Which just goes to show you that even the head of the Human Rights Commission can be corrupt. Allegedly. But corruption is so depressing, let's talk about something a little less soul-crushing. Gay conversion therapy! Well, that's the sound of us being demonetized. The Supreme Court ruled against Colorado's ban on conversion therapy aimed at LGBTQ youth. Of course, it was yet another predictable 6-3 decision, with the liberal justices staunchly opposed to... What's that Shelley? It was an 8-1 decision. So two of the liberal justices ruled in favor of gay conversion therapy? This would be like Bugs Bunny ruling in favor of it being rabbit season. What gives? Well, see, the whole case centered around freedom of speech. The justices ruled that banning this practice does limit free speech because it deals with speech therapy as the means of conversion. It's not the pull-you-out-of-your-bed-in-the-middle-of-the-night-and-force-you-to-shock therapy that most think of when talking about gay conversion. So the idea is, if it's just talk therapy, it can't be banned. And liberal Justice Eleanor Kagan explained that, if the ban was left in place, the precedent could be used to support bans on therapy affirming teens' gender identity. Hence, her support for overturning the ban. Ah, the old Uno reverse card. Which, if it was rainbow colored, would be the official logo of conversion therapy. But with this ruling, states now have a framework for having gay conversion therapy, just in time for Kristi Noem's husband Brian to potentially get in on it. As he's been shown in several pictures, with balloons stuffed in a tight shirt to look like enormous breasts. People are obviously dunking on Kristi Noem over this, not just because this made her and her husband easy targets for blackmail, but since most folks don't exactly see a guy wearing fake boobs as a conservative value. And those people are wrong. Because what's more American than big, fake, lopsided boobs? We should send Byron over to Iran to show the religious extremists in the military they're missing out on, and what America is fighting for. Speaking of the Iran war slash military operation, thanks to it, gas crossed a national average price of $4 a gallon for the first time in three years. To which drivers in California responded, Hey, could we get in on that $4 gas? As a result of the increased gas costs, fresh food distributors are adding surcharges to their items. Trump spoke to the nation to try and calm their fears, which led to everyone taking a deep breath and... Oil prices soaring 10 percent. As a way to try and lower fuel costs by increasing oil supply, the Trump administration exempted Gulf of Mexico oil drillers from a law meant to protect endangered species. Which was controversial, to say the least. Of course, right now the most endangered species in the Gulf of Mexico are reporters who still call it the Gulf of Mexico. Don't let Trump hear you call the Gulf of America that, or he'll forcibly throw you out of the press briefing. Even if it's on Air Force One. As for the war slash military operation itself, it looks like it could soon escalate to boots on the ground, as ground forces arrive in the Middle East. And the Pentagon is reportedly preparing for weeks of ground operations. Trump says the US will leave in two to three weeks. And I'm sure they will. Just like Covid was all cleared up before Easter. Many Trump supporters who voted for him to end the forever wars and not start any new ones are frustrated over, well, everything I just said. In fact, a recent AP-NORC poll shows that just 20% of Republicans supported sending ground troops into Iran. Secretary of War Pete Hegses says he doesn't understand why the base would oppose this. Yeah, it's not like sending US troops into the Middle East has ever caused any issues. And if it has, it's not like it happened within our lifetimes and is still a constant source of PTSD. But Hegses is still trying to sell people on the war slash military operation by talking about, um, I'll let him explain it. I witnessed lethality. I met a junior airman as the sun was going down and a chill was setting on the tarmac, who, when asked what they needed, she simply looked up at me with a sly smile on her face and said, more bombs, sir. And bigger bombs. You know, I don't know if beat poetry is the persuasive tactic I would have used, but we'll see how it works out for him. Maybe it'll inspire more people to enlist, since the army raised its enlistment age to 42, and eased marijuana rules. And to anyone saying the reason they eased their marijuana rules is because you need to be high to enlist right now, solid burn, I see what you did there. Talks are still ongoing with Iran to end the war. Maybe. There's a lot of talks about talks, but also a lot of boom, bang, pow. So who knows how this will end. Secretary of State and potential new Ayatollah Marco Rubio expressed his frustrations with the few remaining non-dead leaders of Iran. Imagine in Iran that instead of spending their wealth, billions of dollars supporting terrorists or weapons, had spent that money helping the people of Iran, you'd have a much different country. Spending less on military? I can't imagine. Because the United States can't take care of daycare. That has to be up to a state. We can't take care of daycare. We're a big country. We have 50 states. We have all these other people. We're fighting wars. We can't take care of daycare. Seriously, I literally cannot imagine. So it's been a tough week for Trump. But especially when it comes to the courts. A judge ordered the White House ballroom construction be temporarily halted. The judge wrote, the President of the United States is the steward of the White House for future generations of first families. He is not, however, the owner. I am so tired of these activist judges overstepping their jurisdiction. It's past time the White House gets a ballroom. What's more fun? Nay, American, than a room full of balls you can frolic in and... What's that, Shelley? Oh, a ballroom like a place to hold events. That's way less fun. Since Trump has to wait a little longer on the ballroom, and maybe wait indefinitely on the SAVE Act getting passed, he decided to take matters into his own hands, and Sharpies, and signed an executive order to create federal voter lists. Anyone not on these lists wouldn't be allowed to vote by mail. This'll immediately get challenged in courts, and likely won't stand, since the President can't do that. Like I've said, Trump governs like a novice D&D player. I can't do that? Let's go to the courts and roll for it. But all these court battles must be agitating Trump, because he fired Attorney General Pam Bondi. Clearly this is just Trump lashing out after having a bad day. Because Bondi has done such a phenomenal job, with both parties never having a single criticism of her. She's as popular as bacon... in Israel. Some, like the New York Times, think that Bondi's firing might have had something to do with how she handled the Epstein files. But her replacement, Todd Blanche, says it has nothing to do with that. But we shouldn't be talking about this. We should be talking about the Dow, which is... under 50,000. Okay, let's keep talking about this. Trump wrote on Truth Social, We love Pam and she will be transitioning to a much-needed and important new job in the private sector to be announced at a date in the near future. Which, is there a record skipping somewhere? Because that sounds almost exactly like what he said when he fired Kristi Noem. Something Tulsi Gabbard might be next, and of course there are the inevitable accusations of misogyny. But the truth is, historically, Trump administrations have a high turnover rate, women and men. I say, if you want the job done right, you have to do it yourself. Put money into cloning technology and make the entire Trump administration look like the movie Being Don Malkovich. But what do you think? Leave your comments below with that American flag emoji to show YouTube that we've got engagement. And please, if you want more America Uncovered, I need your help. Subscribe to my exclusive censorship-free website, AmericaUncovered.tv. Just click this button or the link down below. Once again, I'm Chris Chappell. Thank you for watching America Uncovered.