My Mom Guilt-Tripped Me Into Co-Signing 2 Cars

Brought to you by CHM, a budget-friendly, faith-based alternative to health insurance. chministries.org slash budget. When I was around like 20 to 21 years old, I had a pretty good credit score of like 800. And then my mom kind of guilt-tripped me into being a co-signer for one of her cars. And then the following year, there was a second car that I was unknowingly signed into when we refinanced the first car. And I think about two years after that, I've, both cars have been repossessed. And the first car was, there's a judgment on that car, and it's under my name. Oh, boy. And I guess, and there's also a personal loan that my mom kind of made me take out around the same time. What do you mean, made you? Yeah, what's that sound like? Are you against your will? Well, she guilt-tripped me into doing all of that. Yeah, but you're a grown person at 21 years old. Yes, of course. Like, I understand that. But I guess, like, culturally speaking, it was always, you can't say no. Like, I've done so much for you. I need you to do this for me. And you just went, okay, fine. Exactly. And it was, like, nonstop. So essentially, after all of this, we're like, 20K in debt just on my mom alone. And I guess I'm trying to, like, figure out how to move on from one, getting these two cars off of my name. And like, you know, paying, I guess, paying it out. Because I just recently got married, and me and my husband haven't been able to join an account because of this major issue. So I kind of, like, want to find a way. Absolutely. How old are you now? I'm 26. Okay. Oh, okay. So this has been a while back. Yeah. Okay. But I think the repo just happened, like, about two years. What are they coming after you for, for both repos? Tell us the amount for both. So the first car, well, the major car was 10,000. Okay. That's the deficit that you owe? Yes. Okay. After it got auctioned off. What about the second one? The second one is 8,000. Okay. So the good news is you're going to settle both of these. You're not going to pay the full amount because it's been forever. They'll be happy to get anything from you at this point. Do you have any contact with your mom anymore? If you missed Health Plan Open Enrollment, don't panic. Christian Healthcare Ministries offers a budget-friendly alternative to health insurance, and you can join at any time. With CHM, there are no network restrictions, and members say they often save hundreds of dollars a month compared to traditional insurance. So make a change that fits your budget, your values, and your timing. Check out chministries.org slash budget to learn more. Do you have any contact with your mom anymore? We do, but unfortunately, I don't really trust anything she says. Rightfully so. For the sole reason that January of last year, of 2025, she actually moved to another state, and we came to find out that she kind of owed a lot of people a lot of money, and it came to around like a total of like 50 close to 100k in just like personal loans, like under the table. And this year, I kind of talked to her, or at the end of last year, I talked to her to try to settle the personal loans. Let's talk about you. Let's imagine that she's not going to help you solve any of this, and your name's on the debt, and so they don't care about where she is and if she's going to refine to her name. You just need to act like this is debt I took on, and I got to clean the mess up. And it's a learning experience. So I'd be looking to settle these for, you know, 40 to 50 percent of the actual amount owed. That's what I'd start with. And so that would be your goal to save up that cash, because anytime you're going to settle a debt, you've got to have the cash in hand. Lump sum. Lump sum, yep. And you want to get all those stipulations in writing, and you really want to laminate it and keep it forever, because you never want these things to come back and bite you in the butt. How much is the personal loan? Is that another two or three thousand? Yeah, two thousand. Okay. So two thousand on the personal loan. How much do you and your husband earn every month? We, every month would be about six, seven thousand. Okay. And is he on board in the idea that we're going to clean up this mess? Or do you feel like it's kind of on you to do it on your own? I think personally, I don't want him to take on the burden. Can I tell you this? Personally, I don't think you're going to be able to clean this mess up on your own. No, I know. But I think he does listen to The Ramsey Show, so I do know that he'll be willing to settle this with me. If the tables were turned, would you be willing to help him? Of course. Okay, there you go. So as long as you know that you're not asking more of someone than you would want asked of yourself, then I think it's okay that you participate, that you receive that if he's willing to do this with you, which I think he should, by the way. The hardest part is going to be swallowing your pride and going, you know what, I know I feel guilty and shame about this, but I'm going to bring him in because this is marriage. Yeah. No, he's actually helped me because when we first got married, we settled, I think, about two thousand of credit card loans that my mom also racked up. Okay, has any of this been done fraudulently? She's not able to just, like, forge your signature. It sounds like you were there, you at least signed some documents on most of these loans. So, like I said, the first car was her car that she was driving and I was helping her. You co-signed, so that one's legit. The second car, I didn't co-sign. I did co-sign, but what happened was when I went to the dealer, they told me it was a refinance. When it came out, like, I think six months down the line, where we were getting, like, these late payments, they were telling me, oh, it's the car that I took out for my cousin and you are co-signed. And I was like, I was never informed of this. But by then they told me it was too late to back out of it. Okay. Do you guys have any other debt outside of this 20K? No. Student loan debt. How much? How much? I have about 16K and my husband has about 9K. Okay. Promise me. Make me a promise that you have learned your lesson, not just in co-signing, but really in borrowing money in general. Look how much heartache and pain this has caused. This is literally, and don't get me wrong, this is, if I were to assign blame, which I'm not usually in the habit of doing, but most of this is on your mother, okay? There is an imbalance of power there when you're 18, 21 years old, and a parent is saying, you need to do this, you need to do that. You do feel the overwhelming need that either they're right or that you should be listening to them, even if you shouldn't be. So I hate that that happened, but this is such a learning opportunity for you. No more debt, no more co-signing, you pay this off. Never again is really the line in the sand that you need to draw. Have you frozen your credit with all three bureaus, Arlie? No, I haven't. You need to do that yesterday. And while you're at it, pull all three credit reports from the bureaus. You can go to annualcreditreport.com, do it for free, never pay for this. You need a full picture, because who knows what else is out there before we can move forward and do this debt snowball and settle these debts. Let's get a real full picture of what's going on and freeze your credit so nobody, you or your mom, can be opening up debt in your name ever again. That's right. Wishing you the best. This is not a fun situation, but I am very confident you guys can clean this up if you combine your finances together and attack this as a team. Christian Health Care Ministries can save your family hundreds of dollars on health care every month. Learn more at chministries.org slash budget.