Black People Hated Hulk Hogan - Comedian Cody Woods - Chocolate Sundaes Stand Up Comedy

Flew in on Frontier for this ----. Yeah, flew in on Frontier. I'm about to wear these clothes for the next three days. Ever fly Frontier? The flights are like seven bucks. Then you add a Ziploc bag. It's nine hundred dollars. Just gotta wear whatever the **** you're wearing. If you fly Frontier and then land and go shop at Burlington Coat Factory round trip, you pay like 40 bucks. Burlington Coat Factory is hilarious. There are no ******* coats. Store makes no sense at all. It's like candles, socks. Where the **** am I? Shit looks like Ross had a garage sale. You ever notice on Burlington Coat Factory, they got those big signs that say, we prosecute shoplifters. The ---- you sell attracts crackheads. What other store can I buy a screwdriver and a ******* Sean John hoodie in the middle? That is a ******* crackhead store. Nobody wants that ----. It's good to be doing comedy again. This nation's been so divided, man. I've been touring the country, man. It's been a different vibe in this nation. I've been doing comedy 20 years. I've never felt this. Yeah, man. It's ever since that really famous Republican died, you know? A lot of people hated him because they said he's racist. Some people loved him. You know who I'm talking about. Hulk Hogan. Hulk Hogan died. Thought I was going to say Charlie Kirk. No. No, ******* Hulk Hogan, man. I didn't know black people hated Hulk Hogan that bad, man. He's a racist dude, man. I thought it was kind of cool that he died of cardiac arrest, because that means his t-shirt got ripped off one last time. Can you imagine being the ENT doing that ----? Oh, ----. I really hope the ENT was black. Wouldn't that be great? Oh, you're not the brother I want to see. You know the black ENT is going to take his time. All right, clear. Actually, I got some settings I got to **** with here. Help me. No, you just wait right there with your ******* heart attack. Help me. You know black people time. You just wait right the **** there with your little heart attack. It's been a non-stop, like, crazy run on political news. Craziest one. Like, I don't know if you, I think it's true. Do you guys think, uh, you think Trump blew Clinton? You think it happened? Yeah, it's very plausible, right? Because look, Bill Clinton, he's very smooth. And Donald Trump's a little easy to trick. I bet you can't suck a dick for ----. I can suck the best dicks. Like, if it's about being the best, you could get them to suck dicks. You could challenge them to go up in size and ----. All right. Now, Donald, if you say you're the best, it's time for you to suck the biggest dick that's ever been in this White House. Michelle. I'm sorry. I know where I'm at. I know I fucked up. That was a risky one. I don't know. Yeah. This man is insane, though. He's crazier than the last term, man. It's crazier. He's got these tariffs now. Everything's so ******* expensive. And he says, oh, it's to create jobs, supposedly. But we got A.I. now. That ----'s gonna take all of our jobs anyway. And now everything's expensive and we don't have any ******* jobs. We're gonna be calling suicide hotlines. They're all gonna be automated. You don't even get that human connection. Like, don't do it. Please think of your press one for family. Press two for dogs. Press three for mortgage. You selected dogs. Don't do it. Please think of your dogs. To be transferred to a customer service representative. Now transferred you to a man in third world who has harder life than you. ****, here we go. Can't complain to that guy with ******* missiles in the background and ----. To be honest, man, he puts a lot of pressure on me as a white guy, Donald Trump. I always get afraid of, like, saying the wrong thing. You know, you always got to show you're one of the good white guys and ----. When I was on the plane here, man, I was afraid of ordering a black coffee just because the climate didn't feel right, you know? Lady came up to me, she's like, what can I get you, baby? I'm gonna do a coffee. How do you want it? I'm gonna take it straight. She's like, what do you mean by that? Oh, just no cream, no sugar. So you want it black? It's ******* terrifying, man. And you know how they hire on planes? They always go four women, one gay man, right? They have to. I don't know what lawsuit created that ratio. Every airline has to go four women, one top-shelf premium gay man, right? Like, we hit turbulence. Our guy looked like a bobblehead the whole time. Top-shelf gay man. He did the second round of drinks. I didn't even have time to think. He's like, how'd you have your coffee? Straight. Oh, ----. I don't want to make those guys mad, man. My favorite people in the workforce, man. The most friendly customer service. And I'll be honest. I get nervous on planes. Turbulence happens. I always look over. Calms me down. Makes no sense. You'd think they'd have, you know, stronger necks. If I were to bet. I mean, I got a strong right arm, you know what I mean? Like, I just, you know.