You Don't Stop Negative Thinking, you Lose Interest in it

I just want to make a quick video about the misguided strategy to stop being judgmental. Now we are aware that our mind is very judgmental, right? And we are also aware that this judgmental mind that has an opinion and everything and it labels everything and it's very nasty to people and it's nasty to ourselves or it glorifies people and it suggests that we be people pleasers. This judgmental narrative this this chatter that goes on all the time is very unhelpful. And then we'll say well I want to still my mind. I want to question my mind. Now, there's a problem here. And the problem is that we think that it's as simple as a matter of will where we're going to go from this judgmental inner dialogue. Everything is good or bad, useful, not useful, worthy, unworthy. This categorization, we're going to go from that to this state of stillness or being non-judgmental as a matter of somehow practicing meditation or stilling trying to still the mind. And actually, it's one of the worst things you can do because what most people end up doing with this this goal of getting to that stillness or this non-judgmental mind is they just go into outright denial and they just pretend like they're not reacting to things uh because they think that that's not good. It's a bad thing and they should be more involved in that. And if I just practice hard enough and ignore it hard enough, it'll be as if I'll eventually end up in that mind where there is no judgment. It's the worst thing you can do. Now, the reason there's an alternative, the mind that's judgmental sees everything in terms of duality. It sees good, bad, right, wrong, you know, everything worthy, unworthy. The way to get to the mind that is or a mind where you're not affected by that narrative, you could say it's a still mind or a non-judgmental mind. There's a transitional period where instead of seeing everything in terms of good, bad, right, wrong. Everything gets passed through the prism of is it true or is it false. So all these thoughts that we're well not all of them, we can't do that. the mind of so many of these judgments, but particularly the ones that trigger us heavily. Our work is to is to take those well that's good and that's bad. He's great and she's terrible. Take those and to do apply that to the mind that is all about whether something is true or whether it is false and you do that long enough. Is that true? Is that true? Is that true? Is that true? Particularly the ones that trigger it. And what you'll find is invariably the things that you react to very strongly with these negative emotions, these negative reactions, they're not true. And the things you know that person is amazing over there, that's not true actually. if it's making you feel like uh you're inferior, for instance. And you do this long enough and you begin to realize that this judgmental mind is not reliable in any way, shape, or form because it's proven wrong yet and again through this practice of inquiry or questioning. And eventually we end up in this mind that is the narratives can still be there, but we are in this different mentality where we're not bothered by the thoughts anymore. we'll just see them going by and we just it's just doing it. You'll also notice that you're not controlling your thoughts. They're just coming in. They're intrusive. So, if you're not controlling them and you're not generating them, it's very easy to start seeing there it goes. Nothing to do with me. I didn't wake up this morning thinking I was going to have those thoughts. They just are happening. But true questioning, is it true? Is it true? Is it true? Is it true? You begin to realize, well, this thing can't be relied upon. And you lose interest in it. The problem is the mind is is creating all these judgments automatically and we are taking them very seriously. So there's a transition. You can't go from this really strong overwhelming inner narrative of this judgmental talk to a a place of stillness uh without going through that period unless you have some sort of instantaneous um spiritual awakening which I don't know how you do and I don't think many people do or actually experience it at all. I'm not saying nobody does. I think people do but I don't think that can be the uh prescription. So that's my opinion on how you still your mind and how you let go of those thoughts is you start questioning them instead of seeing everything in terms of good, bad, right and wrong. Everything now is about is that true or is that not true and eventually you just lose interest in those thoughts and you're left with stillness and peace. Hope that's useful. I'll talk to you guys very soon. Take care. Bye-bye. [Music] [Applause]