My Husband Doesn’t Want To Share His Inheritance

[Music] brought to you by the every dooll app start budgeting for free today um I just wanted to get Dave's input on a situation um so my husband and I we have four kids we're a blended family uh I have a daughter he has a son and then we have two boys together um his father died and he inherited some land from him it's family land and so when we are talking about inheritance for our children he wants and understandably so the land to go to be split between the three boys because he wants to keep it in his bloodline um and so I am fine with that but where we disagree is on how to do inheritance for my daughter um he thinks the land should be not even taken into consideration when we do inheritance so monetary value Etc shouldn't matter um and so what we're kind of looking at is actually selling our current home and then using the money that we make to move to that land and then build on it um in which case we would live out the rest of our days there and put our money into it and I think that that also should be taken into consideration but he thinks that the boys should get the land split between them and then whatever else inheritance we have left should be split equally between all four kids and so I just kind of wanted your opinion on that wow does it occur to him how hurtful it is when he says that I don't think so if you said that's hurtful you're a butt I haven't said that I try to talk very nicely to him I know but that's what my wife would have said I'm just thinking and it is it's very sentimental to him um his you know his dad yeah yeah yeah yeah and Cinderella has to go the stepchild has to go and mop the floors while the three other ones go to the ball I lost you fine are you there yeah you cut out I don't know what happened to your phone that's okay sorry like I said I don't mind them getting the land that's totally fine it's so how much land is involved um it's only about 33 Acres right now um it was his grandmother's land she sold it and then his dad bought back this portion and was and of it surrounding it and so my husband wants to buy back the remainder as well if we can the remainder is how much on top of the 33 I don't know how much more there is that he would want to buy what is your what is your personal income and what is his income um we he makes about 65 and I make about 55 right now but we both increase pretty regularly every how old are you guys uh 36 okay all right um well I don't know that our opinion really matters here uh cuz Bubba's made his mind up yeah um so I I just kind of wanted to know you know no I I I think that you know probably what you've got is a situation where you need to sit down with your pastor marriage counselor or somebody like that um I I just uh uh it it is it is it is a thing to require some thought but after just listening to you so here here's what I've got okay you make half the money in the house approximately you guys are going to be married and living there probably 40 years so more than uh 3/4 of your life his life is going to be spent doing things together here um and um and including your daughter um and so I'm just calling BS I I think that I think these four kids should be treated equally because your connection to it because you're wanting to he's wanting that you to use your income and help him buy a house on land he doesn't want to leave to your your daughter after 40 years how old is how old are the kids uh my daughter is 14 my stepson's 13 and then our twins are two yeah oh what a wedge yeah yeah yeah no I and that that's thing one thing too is um people and relationships Trump stuff this kid is more important than this piece of land and he's her daddy now and she lives she lives with y'all right yes she does currently yes yeah she you know his relationship to her is more important than 33 freaking acres in Texas okay I just I I just don't um you know I I I would give him about a 20% part of the right answer here and and about 80% wrong so he loses I feel like I feel like a different scenario would be you guys were 55 years old it was your second marriage and the kids are grown that feels different like that that's a completely different situation with saying hey but you're contributing you know the vast majority you're contributing half with the sale of the house and the building of the house your income for 40 years from age 35 to age 65 to age 75 right you're contributing half all the way through there and so how your daughter doesn't get into that half is ridiculous okay from a math standpoint from a philosophical or spiritual standpoint it's just a stupid piece of dirt I don't really care where it came from I mean I've got some dirt that I own that I really love and I'd like to see my kids and grandkids playing on it my great grandkids my great great great grandkids when I'm looking at them from Heaven I'd love to see them playing on that and enjoying that dirt but I don't want it to form their life and I don't want them to value that dirt over relationships yeah yes yes sir yeah I just I I I so I don't buy off on the sentimental crap you know if you I got a um you know a h some hand tools from my dad okay that's sentimental okay they're ancient antique hand tools right and so those are sentimental but uh but I'm certainly not going to let a wrench and a hammer stand between me and a kid that I'm raising I just you know that that's how I put this that's the bucket I put this in I agree I agree wholeheartedly so if the if the step kid wants the hammer it's okay that's fine you know give the other one the wrench it's just stuff yeah and I just I I don't want to so I got I got to I don't think he's thinking this through I don't think he's a butt he's act but but but uh it was kind of fun to say that but I kind of do yeah I in this moment yeah I don't I don't think he's a hurtful person mhm like sure sure you know I think that's what he's doing okay he's not thought of it from all Ang but I just don't think he's thinking through the message he's sending to this teenage girl and I I don't like that message create your free every doll budget today the simplest way to budget for your life