The Boy Who Can't Forget | Aurelien

15th of August, 1996. OK, the very first thing I see is this furry banana which I bought on holiday with my family. 20-year-old Aurelien is remembering a specific day when he was just four years old. He claims to have a power that scientists didn't believe humans could possess. I've never met anyone who's been able to do what I do. Put simply, Aurelien is the first British man to say that he doesn't forget his past. Because I remember the 25th being the day where it snowed in the morning and I think it was the day that George Best died. 7th of July, 2008. It's a Monday. It just seems like there's just no gaps at all. I can just see it all. Around the world, other people have come forward. Some claim to remember every day of their life. Bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing. If you could stick a camera in my head, then I think everybody would freak out. This summer, we met the people who say they have this unbelievable ability and the scientists putting them to the test. I always claimed that actually this was not possible because normal memory does not work like that. Could the amazing power they claim to have possibly turn out to be real? I can tell within, you know, 30 seconds to a minute if someone's genuine or not. October 13th, 1980. Was a Monday. How do you know it's a Monday? Because I just do. Sorry, I didn't want to answer that question. Can you stop filming? Sorry. Sure. Aurelian is a university student. We first filmed with him on Saturday, the 19th of May. Sceptical about his unbelievable talent and curious to see how he could prove it. How could you demonstrate for me what it is that your memory does that maybe mine doesn't? I suppose if someone said, what happened, you know, tell me something that happened in, like, June 2008. And I could instantly think of things, whereas most people would not be even able to remember, you know, what they were doing in that year. What about the 17th of June 2008? Yeah, I can tell you that was a Tuesday and it was the first day after I finished my GCSE exams and my room was an absolute tip. So I had to just clear it all out and I spent the whole day doing that. I could tell you it was quite a nice day. We got sunnier and we went for a curry in the evening. And I remember watching Lee Swimming with my mum and Joan Rivers got through, not for swearing on live TV. Yeah. I checked the date of Joan Rivers' daytime television outburst. He was right. It did occur on Tuesday, the 17th of June, 2008. Aurelian said he couldn't tell me how he did this, but he let me come back and test him on more random dates. 19th of September, 2008. It was a Friday. I remember my dad was, like, selling his car. It was the last time that we saw his car before it got taken. 30th of May, 2007. It was a Wednesday. The weather was quite good that day, but, which was quite unusual because it rained pretty much for the whole of that May. When you tell me all this stuff, how am I supposed to know it's right? How am I supposed to know that you remember this stuff? You claim it's true, but how do I know? I suppose the thing is you don't, so I could be making it up right now, but... Are you making it up? No. I don't see why I would bother, to be honest with you. What do you think about it? I think it's a little unusual. And I'm rather curious about how you're doing it. Aurelian told me he remembered days way back into his childhood, but he had absolutely no idea how they stuck in his head. I wanted his parents to confirm the truth of his memories and see what they thought of their son's strange skill. We were talking sometimes at the table when we were having a meal, and then I used to say, for instance, or do you remember when we went to Bangkok three years ago or whatever? I used to say, no, it was not three years ago, it was four years ago, and he was actually on the blah, blah, blah, and he gave me the day, the month, and so forth. And I used to say, really? And then I used to run to look in my diary to see, you know, just to check. And I think that's why I started to think, gosh, you know, your memory is not bad. Do you remember what we did on the 30th of August, 2004? 30th of August, 2004. I think that it, I know it was a Monday. Yeah. Bank holiday. How do you know that? I think it could be, I know that we went to the Cadbury factory around that time. Yeah, yeah, that's correct. So I don't know if, I don't know for certain that it was that day. Yeah, it is that day. But I know that it was around that time. Yeah, that's correct. That's exactly what we did. We went to Cadbury World. We stopped in Ross-on-Wye on the day, and we had a great day eating chocolate. And over the years, we've learned to sort of accept that if Aurelian does say that there's a date that's correct, that after a couple of years of saying, oh, no, you got that wrong and realizing that he wasn't wrong, we tend to accept it now without challenging it. What's your explanation for why Aurelian can do that? Because he's just like me, he's bright. I don't know, because as I said to you before, it's not something, I knew he had a good memory, but that was the extent of it, really. I never knew he was something really special and different from most people. It seemed Aurelian's memories were surprisingly accurate, but it was hard to know how much of his life he'd got stored in his head. So, I'll pick a month at random. July 2009. The month I chose was three years ago. 1,080 days have passed since these events took place. I can remember 20 of the days like that. I can remember all of those days. I suppose there are three things that pop out instantly when I think of July. I went to France one weekend. Tour in France, Duke of Edinburgh, and a driving lesson, in fact. I can put that there. And I think around that time, I started reading Tess of the D'Urbervilles. You know, it's like I could get a diary for 2009 and write it if I wanted to, retrospectively. Aurelian said that his brain stored all this information automatically, but I wondered if he was hiding some secret technique. We went to meet a man who has trained his memory, eight-times world memory champion Dominic O'Brien. I would be suspicious if someone said that they automatically know what they were doing on a specific day in their life, the day of the week for any date, without involving some sort of technique. I can tell within, you know, 30 seconds to a minute if someone's genuine or not. And most of the time, they're not able to do what they claim. Hello, you must be Aurelian. Yes, Dominic. Welcome. Nice to meet you. How are you? Good, you? Come inside, we'll share some memories. Thank you. Go. OK. Go. Aurelian says he has no technique to help his extraordinary memory. Dominic O'Brien does, and he can memorise information at a world-record-breaking speed. OK. Two of hearts, four of diamonds, the jack of hearts, the jack of clubs, seven of clubs, two of clubs. Completely right. All right. I'd be interested to know what you do, obviously, to just... I honestly don't know where I'd begin. I mean, the jack of diamonds could be Johnny Depp. Right. J, D, jack of diamonds. The queen of clubs, wherever that is, there we are, the queen of clubs, that could be Paris Hilton, because she likes to go clubbing, she's the queen of nightclubs. So now when I see the cards, I automatically see people. Mental images are the key to Dominic's remarkable memory. And he has a similar method to calculate dates. The 1st of June, 2004. Tuesday, I think. Yeah. Is that right? Yeah. The 3rd of October, 2003. Can you do that? 3rd of October. I think that was a Friday. Yes, it was, yeah. I remember my sister had a friend over. How about the 15th of April, 2007? Ooh. That was a Sunday and I went canoeing. I was in Zambia, me and my dad and my sister went canoeing. Just remember that date straight away. 10th of August. Yeah. 2007. What's your nearest point of reference? My nearest point of reference is the 8th, which was a Wednesday. Actually, the 7th. I remember that night, I'd eaten way too much and I threw up. So, for instance, I know instantly what the 8th of August was. So you're using a reference point. Yeah. The 8th was a Wednesday. Yeah. That's right. So then I think Friday must have been the 10th. You're not making a point of, I must remember this day because it's two days before my birthday and I must remember the future, so you don't review this. That is fascinating. Yeah. That is interesting. I don't think I've ever met somebody quite like you. That's extraordinary, because for me to do that, I mean, I could do what you do if I made a conscious effort to do it. Yeah. But I would have to review every day at the end of the day and then think about it the following day, next week, next month, et cetera, until I've got it. I think of it as, it's almost like this is an imaginary pen writing in events in a sort of mental calendar. So you're convinced, are you? I'm 99% sure Aurelian is the genuine article. 95%. I don't think that people would meet me and think, like, he's got something funny about his hair. Yeah, but we had no idea, like, at all. As soon as you suddenly said, oh, I've got this thing, I was like, what? Really? It seemed Aurelian had only just started to let others see his hidden talent. I just, I'd love to know what, I don't know what you think. I don't know. It's weird, I think it's weird that I can say a date and you would know what day it was. Yeah. Rhyl, do you remember when you lost your virginity? What date was that? There are some things which are... What did you say the date you remember? No, I do. It was the 19th of January 2006. So you lost it on a Thursday. What? Is it really cool or really weird? Strange. Weird. I wasn't the only person trying to make sense of his extraordinary ability. Yeah, masters of memory, here it is. People who can recall exactly what happened on every day of their lives. His boyfriend, Henry, had come across a story of people with a suspiciously similar skill. So, like, do you struggle to remember what you had for breakfast yesterday better than what you did last weekend? Yeah, so this is basically what I read. And then you watch the documentary. Jill Price was the first person in the world to come forward with this ability. She's been living with it for almost four decades. I actually think we should be, like, in a mental hospital, because this makes me crazy. Like, I still feel bad about stuff that happened 30 years ago. But we all do. I mean, we can all remember one or two things. It's not one or two things. Everything. I mean, hers is very extreme. She can remember every single day. As you get older and you live more of a life, I think you'll definitely be able to remember more. Possibly. Time will tell, like, how far back you will be able to go. I mean, short of a lobotomy, I don't really think that there's anything that can be done for me. Jill Price seemed to be struggling with a memory even more powerful than Aurelian's. Maybe she had some explanation for why he remembered so much. In the last year, Jill hadn't granted a single interview. But she had agreed to meet me. We arranged to meet in a hotel in Los Angeles on the morning of Saturday, the 24th of June. Could the troubled mind of this 46-year-old school administrator hold the key to understanding this mysterious skill? Is there a way you can show me what it is you can do? No. If you could stick a camera in my head, then I think everybody would freak out. Like, I can see my memories, you know? Starting in February of 1980 until now, it's, like, every day. Every...every day. You can literally remember every day? Mm-hm. It's made life extremely emotionally difficult at times. There's a lot of complex emotions that go along with not being able to, you know, forget. Because everything in someone's life, there's, like, a huge... There's a line, but everything is connected, and I wouldn't be here if this didn't happen. And I always am thinking about, God, if I had just not done this, then this wouldn't have happened. It's harder as years have gone by, cos there's so much stuff. You know, everyone has baggage. I've got a freaking steamer trunk that's just, like...that I'm just dragging along. I've suffered a few bouts of depression over the years. And no psychologist and no doctors were able to give me any answers. I've asked therapists, I've asked... Believe me, it's not like I didn't talk about this and want to know, like, you know, well, what? Nobody had an answer for me. So I thought, well, I'll go to a scientist. The first thing that popped up was Dr McGaw. Dr James L McGaw, distinguished professor of neurobiology, has spent his career trying to understand how strong memories are made. He's been carefully testing Jill's memory for several years. I found him on June 5th, 2000, which was a Monday. And then on June 12th, he called me and we set up a time to meet on June 24th. It's more than a decade since Jill's first visit to the university. But her recollection of events can easily be checked. Let me see, what year did we want the calendar for? Is it 2000? 2000. Over the years, Dr McGaw's assistant has kept a faithful record of what he's done day by day. And you're looking for June? Mm-hm. Yeah, the 24th. She was right about that. June 24th. Do you know when you first met Jill? No, I don't. But it was some time later, because you met with her maybe another time on a Saturday, I think? I think it was Saturday, July 8th. You know how I know that? Because it's written right here. LAUGHTER These are my memories. They're all written down here. And then I recall, yes, I remember it well. Oh, my son got married. I'm the keeper of the book, not of the memories. And then I went to Stockholm. I didn't know that. When they met, Dr McGaw needed to verify Jill's memory. So he asked about things she may have seen in the news. So, I knew how old she was, so I had to find some time, so I just randomly said, well, let's see... What were the dates of the two O.J. Simpson verdicts? October 3rd, 1995, and February 4th, 1997. We had a Concorde plane crash. July 25th. And she was just remarkably accurate. The first question he asked me was when the Iranian hostage situation started, and I told him, and then he told me I was wrong, and I told him I was right, and that went back and forth, and then we found out that, of course, I was right. How certain were you you were right? 100%. Why? Because I just was. Same thing happened when Diane Sawyer was interviewing me on 20-20, and she asked me when Princess Grace died. September 14th, 1982. I went into a whole long thing. It was the first day of 12th grade. It was Tuesday, September 14th. That was the first day I started 12th grade. I went into this whole long story, and she looks at me, she goes, no. Wait, September 10th, 1982. And I'm like, yeah. And she said, no. And I said, yeah. So September 10th. Well, that night might not be right. I don't know, but in the room, you know, with the producers and everybody, they're all scrambling back there, BlackBerrys, Googling, and then the door opens up and the producer sticks his head out and he screams, the book is wrong. The book is wrong. What? It's always irked my crap. Maybe you should check your facts first before you do that because you look like a dumb idiot. Sorry. I want you to draw for me your representation of the years, the months, and the days of the week. Dr. McGaw was facing something no scientist had ever seen before. We know almost nothing about the causes of forgetting. That's a big black hole in scientific research. We know an awful lot about the conditions which create memories. We know very little about what happens when people forget. What was that for? Is there some significance to the length of the line that you draw across? It's just how I see it in my head. Why did you draw those lines there? Just to show that it didn't go all the way there and kind of came down here. What does that mean? I don't understand what that means. So you're the first individual who is poor at forgetting. October 13, 1980. Was a Monday. So I would just think of like that and on a Monday. How do you know it's a Monday? Because I just do. Which is really unusual. Really unusual. So that has to be motivating for a scientist. We said, let's see what we can find out about that. That's all I care about. As long as, you know, somebody in the science world took me seriously, I was thrilled with that. You have no idea. Today, Dr. McGaw is still trying to make sense of Jill's ability. And now his research program has grown much larger than he could ever have imagined. Because after Jill appeared on worldwide television, incredibly, ten other people with disability appeared. I met 62-year-old television producer Bob Petrella, who is letting the scientists test him. And the last date is March 5th. March 5th was a Monday. I got some spaghetti and I got some rice and I got some vegetables, and I got some grated cheese. Most people don't understand it. They think it's photographic. They think it's autistic savant. They think it's absolute. They think you remember everything. Well, we don't. We don't remember every single thing. We make mistakes. We forget where our keys are or where we parked our car, like anybody else. But I think it's fairly complete than what I was doing on most days of my life. All right. And that's all I have. I don't know how I do it. It's just there. And it's been there, you know, since I was young. I knew it was a little unusual for years, and for them to... But I didn't know why I remembered like I did. I wasn't even sure how. They said they didn't know how they did it. Dr McGaw hadn't worked out how they did it. But there was another scientist who thought that he could explain. He met Jill and wrote an article in Wired magazine. He said the truth was she was obsessed with her past. I don't think that her memory is fundamentally different from other people's. I think that in the same way that a child can be very interested in baseball cards, she's interested in the facts of her own life, and she thinks about them, she reflects on them. Crap. I don't give a shit that it's in Wired magazine. That means nothing, OK? It's crap. We never claim that she had a perfect memory. Jill Price, who seems to remember everything, she does not remember everything. What she remembers, she doesn't forget. That's the difference. Many people have been trying to make sense of Jill Price's memory. But the first person to offer an explanation found it wasn't well received. I will just say that I was greatly offended by his article. And a lot of people read that article, so a lot of people are like, you know, they think this is what this is, that it's just some stupid simplistic OCD of the brain. I had come across this article before I travelled to America. I went to meet the author to learn how he thought Jill remembered so much. I think what drives Jill to have such a good memory is not so much the memory circuits of her brain, but the circuits that drive her to want to remember things. It's not a conscious wanting, it's like a drug addict's wanting. They may not even want the heroin per se, but they just can't help it. She's got a kind of compulsion about memory, and I think it's that aspect of her personality, if you will, that drives her to remember things, to reflect on them. Dr Marcus drew attention to Jill's 50,000 pages of diaries. He believed she was just obsessively thinking about her past. How much of this kind of subtle rehearsing you would have to do in order to have a strong memory of something that happened 20 years ago? Strong and readily... readily available. Quickly available. Well, that's the nature of science, that you're sceptical. If I wasn't doing this, I'd be sceptical. I mean, what he did was totally minimised my life. I guess that's the hard thing about it. Well, that's what I'm saying. It's... It's your life. It's my life, and I'm not, like, just a brain. I have a heart and I have a soul, and there's a lot of complexities that go along with it. So to make it so simplistic like that totally offended me. I didn't actually speak to him. Well, he has... You don't need to speak to him, because he doesn't know me, and I find it interesting that anybody would call him to ask about me when he doesn't know me. I suspected it was Dr Marcus's article that had made Jill reluctant to talk to the media. But could there be some truth in what he'd had to say? Was there a link with obsessive behaviour? It was something Bob Petrella had talked about too. You know, I think it's OK to have an obsession as long as it's not a negative thing. You know, if you're stalking a woman, then that's an obsession, obviously, that's bad. Bob invited me to his home to see something he'd created from memory in 1999. So because I was turning 50 the next year and it was the end of the millennium, I thought I should choose, just for myself, I should choose my most memorable days of each date of the year. You know, I didn't really hold back, so there's stuff about drugs, sex and rock and roll in here. And I just called it because it's an acronym for my name and I called it The Book of Bob, B-O-B. Although it's not really a book, it's more of a journal. Like I said, today is June 29th, so it's June 29th, 1999, I'm driving home, and then I would just go through all of the June 29ths that I remember in my life, and then I would go, oh, 65, 68, 71, 73. 73 I remember because I was constipated. And so we were sitting at a restaurant, and I was visiting, and I hadn't gone for about 4 or 5 days, and we were sitting in a restaurant, and Richard Nixon was president at the time, and I could do his voice, and I suddenly felt like I was able to go after being constipated, and I did it as Nixon, and I said, it's time, I think it's time. You know, so that was June 29th, 73, it was early in the morning. I did my rankings of the years, you know, best year to worst year. 85 and 2004 are tied, and then 2008, 2009, so the 2000s were pretty good. Do you think this cataloguing of your life like this is kind of a little bit unusual, Bob? Oh, yeah, definitely unusual, but I think that this is what people like me do that have a good memory, because that's one of the common things they say, they catalogue stuff. Bob's behaviour did seem a little obsessive. But remembering his history was clearly something he enjoyed. I like having my memories. You know, I mean, nobody else is going to remember my life, so why shouldn't I? You know, for Jill, I never met Jill, but I know for her that she is haunted by her memories, and, you know, so I think it varies with all of us. It was certainly true that Jill was troubled by her memories, and there was a limit to how much of her life she was prepared to share. Hi, Jill. How are you doing? OK. What about driving? Could we do a little bit of driving with you? Do you mind talking a bit while we drive? Sure. Are there particular things that you're happy to talk about? I just don't want to... I have no problem talking about any of this stuff. I just don't really feel like opening up my life. You know, I don't need to do that. I don't want to do that. But Jill had decided to bring something to show me. The very thing the Wired magazine article had said was evidence of obsession with her past. Yeah, no, I don't really let people read these. This is my journal. I've gotten in arguments with people about wanting to read my journal. I'm like, yeah, that's not going to happen. It's got everything. Everything. Everybody. Everything. It looks very densely written. It is. I feel constricted to the line paper. So how many things like this do you have, Jill? I started writing in a journal in December of 1976. This is the day. And then it goes to the other side. That's why I wrote really small. How often do you re-read something like this? I don't re-read any of it. I've only had to go back and get all these because of you guys. I don't re-read these. I don't need to. Once it's down, it's down and done. It's put away. It's not possible to sit and memorize. This is just like a smidge of how many journals I have. And that would mean that I would just be sitting and spending all my days reading my journals. And that's the biggest bunch of bullshit that I've ever heard in my life. I don't write this to remember. I write it so that I don't go crazy. I left without an explanation of how these people remembered. But with an understanding of how their ability could complicate life. When I returned to see Aurelian, I wondered how similar he was to the people I'd met. He'd always said that his ability to remember so much didn't trouble him at all. Oh, God. I know that was Mount Fuji day. That was on your birthday, 2008. Being able to look at the photographs brings back memories of the places we used to go, the things we used to do. I place a lot of importance on photos as well. If there's someone not taking photos of something, I instantly do it. And I think that a photo is the closest thing you can get actually to making a memory into an object, actually. It's a concrete memory, I think. Yeah, it never goes away. It's infallible. Aurelian had surprised me by remembering the start dates of seven series of television show Big Brother. The fourth series started on the 23rd of May, 2003, which was a Friday. The fifth series started on the 28th of May, 2004, which was a Friday. The sixth series started on the 27th of May, Friday. He even correctly recalled the dates individual contestants were evicted from the house. On the 7th, Leah was evicted. On the 14th, Nicky was evicted. On the 21st, Jane was evicted. Could this be evidence of some kind of obsession? He didn't seem happy to be tested on it again. The 27th of May, 2005. I don't really want to do the Big Brother thing, sorry. Sorry, I don't want to answer that question. It's odd to communicate that I can just remember these sorts of things without even trying, without them having any importance. I just remember them. I think that would be alien to a lot of people. I think it's also kind of a bit like when you remember, I don't know, you remembered my great-aunt Margaret's birthday and stuff like that, and people might think, oh, you're really weird for remembering random people's birthdays, or you're really weird for remembering what I wore. Like, are you some kind of stalker or something? Like I said, you don't choose to remember it, it just stays there. I think you sometimes, you kind of have a warped opinion of what people think of it. And like with Big Brother, you're worried that people think it's weird, like you're some avid fan of it. It's just, it's... It's complicated to put across how you can remember something like that, even though it means nothing. I think that's, you know, people always think you remember things which are important, but I think it's an example of where I remember things which are completely unimportant and have absolutely no value at all. But I just happen to remember them. Aurelian seemed to be interested in what was different about his memory. Before I met him, he had contacted a memory research team at the University of Hull. Giuliana Mazzoni, a professor of psychology, had been scouring Europe to find someone with Aurelian's skill. Do you remember anything about the 20th of December 2009? Yes, it was a Sunday. The weather was quite good, it was quite windy. It was for me a sort of revelation that people can remember the weather on a specific date. It is really, really quite a remarkable thing to observe, you know, especially for a person like me who has a very poor memory. Do you have an idea which day of the week was the 27th? The 27th was a Saturday. I always claimed that actually this was not possible because normal memory does not work like that. I think that I've solved one question, which is, is this real? The answer is, yes, it is real. The questions that remain are how and why. Professor Mazzoni had been preparing a pioneering experiment that might unlock the secrets of Aurelian's mind. It is these exceptional cases that actually give the first hint, you know, the first clue to something that we don't know yet, something that really might change the way we look about memory retrieval. So it is really an exciting moment. We travelled together to the professor's homeland of Italy. Aurelian had an appointment at a hospital where the professor had assembled a trusted team. They hoped a brain scan would reveal what happens when Aurelian is remembering. And the test they were about to do was one that had never been done before. And I think that we should be almost ready to go now, which is lovely, which is exciting, which is exciting. Aurelian, can you hear me? Aurelian's brain had never been examined. Professor Mazzoni wanted to see if he was different to everyone else. Oh, look at that. Sorry. It's a very, very clear picture of the corpus callosum, which is this part that connects the two hemispheres of the brain. That's great. The first scans revealed the brain's structure and how well different areas are connected. But it was the second hour-long functional scan that the American team hadn't yet done. We're close to the end of this run. Aurelian's brain activity was recorded as he remembered what happened on a huge list of dates. Second response. Second response and immediately the other blue. OK, good. Good control. Six. Now. Good. Luca suggests that we need to open a bottle of Prosecco. Congratulations, Aurelian. You made it. I'm so glad. So what came out from your brain imaging data and in particular from the functional data, from the type of activation that was occurring when you were retrieving the memory initially, is that you were using a lot of visual areas. So it is as if those areas are particularly strong in you and they really help your memory. In the first moments of retrieving a memory, it appears that Aurelian uses areas of the brain that the rest of us don't. There is something really extraordinary in this data because we have been able to see that Aurelian really accesses memories very, very quickly compared to the average person, as if the memories are represented as a prepackaged fact that so becomes accessible without much effort. I really think that this might tell us about potentials in the brain that might not be exploited in more, in quotes, average people. It is wonderful to be able to be at that moment in which things might change. There might be this small revolution in how we think. My brain caused a revolution. The ultimate question is, can we all be trained in a way that allows us to function like Aurelian? Dr McGaw and his team have a group of these people to study. They have been comparing how the structure of their brains differ from ours. But the truth is that neither of these scientists have yet made sense of this extraordinary skill. It is a very rare ability. So we're doing the Sherlock Holmes detective work and the answer is going to be complicated. We know brains of these people differ in some ways from other people. We know that there are some brain regions that are smaller, some are larger, and some are different in shape. That's something, the beginning. Remember, it's Sherlock Holmes. The mystery is not solved on page one. And we're still on page one. Twenty-three. After a summer spent with these remarkable people, trying to find out the truth, there's one question that's constantly played on my mind. Suppose it was possible to have a memory like this. Is it something the rest of us would want? I feel like my memory has ruled my life. I feel like no matter how, no matter what, my memory has ruled my life. I remember all the warts. To really think about remembering like 35 years ago right now, and how you felt, and how, or what someone said to you, and how that's never changed, you know, it can be very, very tormenting. There's not one day that I'm not like stressed out about something or thinking about something from 20 years ago that means absolutely nothing today but still bothers me or still upsets me or still pisses me off, and it's ridiculous. But, you know, it's like yesterday. It really is as if it was yesterday. I'm parched. Cheers. I know you said that you could remember every single time we've met since we've been together and stuff. Are you ever going to get annoyed at me for forgetting? No, I really, it doesn't bother me. You understand it. It might be something that I could get quite jealous of because, you know, you'll, good days that we have together like today, for instance, you'll remember forever kind of thing. Whereas I'll kind of, it'll slowly just sort of fade out of my memory and I won't. There's nothing negative about being able to remember anything. No, I don't know what it is. I think, the more I think about it, the more I think it's a really nice thing to have. And I think what's nice is that now I know it's something special, I think I'll sort of value it more.