What is the Ideal Chinese Guy Like?

Hey guys, there's a lot of questions around what Chinese girls look for in a guy. So the other day we did a video with Mia and Yi on one of our other channels, Asian Beauty Secrets, and it basically boiled down to all the crucial elements that Chinese girls look for in a relationship. Dan and Yi were so funny, I couldn't stop laughing. So I thought, why not share with all the great world viewers too? You guys will love it. Here it is. So today we're going to talk about the ideal guy in China. Basically there's a lot of 20 something year old girls, even 30 something year old girls, find trouble finding the ideal guy. And so I went online and looked for some surveys and researched some things to find out what are the qualities and things that they want to find. So disclaimer before we start, this is not applied to every Chinese girl, so we are very just generalizing here and it's from the internet. So what are the first one? You have to own at least an apartment or a house. Well that is very common in China because that's like something that they're being taught to have pretty much. Yeah. It's like you're a son, you must have a house and a car, that's it, or you're just, you're doomed. I think having an apartment is totally useful. Think about it, if you live in a dorm and you want to, you know, kind of like, you know, date or something like that, how inconvenient is it? You have four other people there staring at you and you have to wait for people to get out of the dorm so that you can have some alone time. Like how many people in China in their college days have an apartment and a car? I mean you're in college, why do you need those things? I think what they say instead of being wealthy, as number one, they say having an apartment and car means equals wealthy. I think in high school, you can date whoever you want, you know, it's kind of like, oh it's playing around, but once you get hit college, I feel like girls take it much more seriously. Girls want to think about marriage and having an apartment is a huge deal in marriage. There's a term in China called it basically means if you don't have a house, don't come. That's so funny. Do you guys know that the cities in China, especially like big cities like Shanghai and Beijing, you know, Hong Kong, are some of the most expensive cities in the world. And it's not just renting an apartment, the guy has to own the apartment. How rich do women want guys to be? So they also want Why does this remind me of wasp families in America as well? Is he from Harvard? If he's not, don't ask him to come and meet us, you know? I mean in China though, education is a lot more important and it's not, sometimes Chinese parents will even tolerate someone who has a good degree and is not making so much money just yet. Oh my god, yes. Simply because they think, first of all, my in-law is from Tsinghua. Yeah, it's all about the face, it's all about the label. That, that is important to them. Wow, so so far I'm basically failing in China because, oh I shouldn't tell people that, I don't have a BA. So I'm basically like, I'm like trash in China. You don't have to put that on there. Wait till the next thing. Oh no, oh my god, what's next? Then Oh god, I know. Oh, forget about it. All right, there's a reason it's called gao fu shuai. Gao comes first, fu comes second, shuai comes last. Right. Gao is so, so, so important. I cannot stress this enough. I agree, I agree. So. Being tall again. Dan, I don't think you'll do so well. I'll just be honest with you. Your stocks just drop like this. That's why I live in America. I feel like shorter girls should be able to accept guys who are shorter but are still taller than them. But no, but in China apparently, even the short girls want tall guys. And you know what's really frustrating for me, is that when I go back to China, I oftentimes see the shorter girls with the tall guys. And I'm like, so you took all the tall guys. This is why I don't have a tall guy. The reason why they pick the tall guys is because they want to have that gene, so their offspring is tall, right? That's why. Excellent. It's kind of like gene stealing, you know? It is true, it is true. That's a great factor. And those tall guys need to be between 120 to 140. Oh my god, this is like nothing. Yeah. Like lighter than me. 120, what do you mean? Like kilograms. Yeah, 60 to 70 kilograms. So convert it into how many pounds? 112 pounds. 112? Yeah. I got 112 pounds in my leg. What? A model comes to mind. Kate Moss comes to mind, not my ideal man. Yeah. Okay. Fortunately for a lot of Chinese guys, their metabolism is very, very good, so they stay thin naturally. That's a good point. I'm overweight, I'm under height, I don't have a degree. Oh god. I want to cry. I feel like I want to cry for him. The thing is that they want the guy to be one to five years older than themselves. Oh wow. Yeah, but that's just... But only one to five, but not more, right? Yeah. I can see why that's common, because they want a guy who's mature, because that should come to mind when you become older, right? That wisdom age sort of grow together. Yeah, studies show that women are actually two years older than men. The two men and women at the same age, the woman is older psychologically by two years, so it makes sense. Yeah, because you want to be stimulated by new things. You want to learn new things from the partner, not having to teach them. Can that become a mother-son relationship? That's weird. Preferably one or two previous relationships. Okay. Oh my god. You know what? So he's got to have some experience in the relationship department. But not more than two. Oh, not more than two, because then he's a playa. That's right. Well, I think... Honestly, I think... It's so funny how it's no more than two. He could have had two and a half. It's over. But I've only dated this other girl for one month. Does that count? Get some experience, guys, but not too much. No more than two. No more than two. It's the ideal personality. Wait, who cares about personality? If you need all those things, you're lucky to just find somebody that fits that category. The most choose is... Okay. Smart. Smart and business savvy. Smart? Is that even a personality trait? That's a skill. I think why Chinese girls think that business savvy is a personality trait that they're attracted to is because... I think Chinese girls are especially attracted to intelligence and talent. So when you're intelligent, when you come off as a smart person, especially if you're business savvy, which means that you're probably rich, then it's extra extra smart. Or you're the son of a guan. Son of a guan. But if you're son of a guan, which could be a new trend now that you've made that up, but you might not be smart. You might just have a good background. It's like, what do you have in mind? You son of a guan. You son of a guan. Everyone has a personality. Exactly. But it's whether your personality matches that personality. True. But even if it matches, what if that guy's values are terrible? What if he's like, I don't believe in marriage for a long time. My values are if I'm not happy with you, I'll divorce you. Or my values are... But if he I think she's okay with that. So, so far, if we look at our survey... I do. He's got to own an apartment and a car. He's got to be tall. So between, you know, I don't know the Chinese... 5 foot 7 to 5 foot 9. At least. What else? Personality. Oh, the personality. Yeah. They want him to have a good personality, business savvy or smart. Yes. Oh, relationship experience. No more than two previous relationships. Oh, and one to five years older. Okay, listen, this is something funny. We actually watched a video before where it shows guys' reactions to the girls' requests. And the guy was like, are you kidding me? Does she look like Lin Zhilin? She expects me to be like George Clooney? Like, you know... It's like, you better, you better look better than that if you want me to be like... Is she Lin Zhilin? Wang Li Hong or something. Lin Zhilin is tender and caring, soft-spoken, beautiful, tall and awesome. Are you? Are you, basically? I think that comes down to like 10 people in China. Yeah. Once you find them, they gotta be. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. When you find them, they gotta be unhitched. Or hey, if they're hitched, go in and break them up. I'm sure they don't mind at that point. That's why a lot of the hitched ones have multiple partners. The guys? Yeah. Oh, yeah. They have like Xiao San, Xiao Si. I think the girls who have a guy like this know what they have. Yeah. I've got a guy who has four other girlfriends and one wife. Awesome me. She doesn't care because... Oh, that's true. There you go. I guess, you know what? It is... That's what I'm saying. It's really not their fault. It comes down to their personal preference. Like, what does she value more? What if there's this perfect guy, right? This fits all the requirements, but he smells. Oh, I was going to ask that. I was actually going to ask that. Like, let's say he has a horrible breath and a horrible B.O. And like, and just so... But he fits all those others. Yeah. That's the one thing. No, I honestly think they won't even care. They won't even blink twice. They'll be like, you've got a car, you've got a house, you're tall, you're anorexic. No, you won't. No, you're going to tell yourself like... No, you won't. You'll be like, you know what? I like the smell of money. Like, give me that dollar bill. It smells so good. You know? Why do you think Chinese girls have become this way? I mean, when I say Chinese girls, I don't mean all, obviously. Like, a lot of Chinese girls become this way. I find that when people are raised with the idea, and this could be society, their personal family, the idea that material things, what other people say about you, how you look to society, can shape you. The most important thing of all. If you place that super important, then if the girl can't get it herself, she's going to try to look for it another way. And finding a rich husband, that all those things, is the second best way to do that, if you can't get it yourself. I also think, I mean, a lot of the Chinese girls I know, I mean, their parents are the ones that, they actually might not, they actually might like somebody who's shorter, and he's got a great personality, and he's not that rich, but he's got ambition, and he's decent looking. But, you know, their parents might be like, what are you doing with him? So I think a lot of Chinese parents perpetuate this, and it's terrible, they're ruining their kids. I know, I, yes, I am also a victim of this. Yeah, the parents, you know, I don't want to blame it all on the parents. No, no, definitely. It's society. It's society, yeah. No, I understand from a mother's point of view. From a mother's point of view, obviously they want the best for their child, so they always think that it's better for the child to be looked after, because that's what they know. Because they know that if a guy is, you know, rich, and can afford her, you know, habits, Okay, I want to retract. I don't, what I just said might sound like it's all the parents' fault. No, I don't think it's all the parents' fault. I think the parents don't make it something, like, they add to that, but I also think Chinese society adds to that. Society, definitely. Of course, because the one-child policy, I think, actually contributes to this. Because you think about it, when we're all one kid, the parents spoil you to death. You're the center of their universe. So, and it's, in the past, some people had one child, some people had two children, some people had three children. Not everyone is an only child. But now, most people in China are only children, and they're so self-centered. Like, I'm an only child, and I find myself being self-centered all the time. You don't want to, you don't want to compromise in a relationship. What's compromise, you know? Me, me, me, me, me, you know? And that's a lot of the culture, is like, the guy has to give me everything. He has to be all these things, and I don't have to look like Lin Zhiling, because I'm me. If the parents have a daughter, and they, like you said, they have one kid, it's almost like, that daughter's got to marry a rich guy to take care of that family. So, it's almost like, no choice. No, because with Western parents, they start planning for their retirement early on, and the American retirement system works. In China, there's no such system like that. You know, America, even though Social Security, that's a whole nother thing, but like, they can retire without the child's help, if they start planning early enough. And in China, there's, it's very hard to do that in the same way. So, they often rely on their children, which is their only source of income in their old age, you know? I think, ultimately, it comes down to personal preferences. I still know people in China who just don't care about these kind of things. I know plenty of my friends who just like a guy. But what about their parents? Like, well, I've even actually met very reasonable parents. You know, they're like, you know what? As long as my daughter's happy, that's her life. She chooses to live that way, and if she ends up with no money, then we'll be here to support her. I think like Western people, people are more open-minded these days. There are always parents who are overbearing, but there are good people too. After all of that discussion, basically, what Chinese people, what Chinese girls want in China is very limited, and that's why they're single, clearly, right? So, all you hot, or not that hot, 25-year-old and above chicks, look, you're not gonna find a Chinese guy like that, and if you do, he's gonna have three wives already. So, just put that down. Go dance the salsa in Spain and have a hot Spanish guy dance with you. You'll love it. Go to America and date like a football player jock. You'll love it. You know, follow want. Like, you know, when you meet a guy and there's good chemistry, you know it's good chemistry, you know? And you shouldn't like start taking out your checkbook. Hmm, I wonder. You know, do you have a house? But how do you, how do they forget about all those factors that make them think, do you have a house? Well, I think having good chemistry in the first place, then find out later. Based on what I have experienced is that I think, at the end of the day, it doesn't matter who you find, as long as that person is giving you his 100%. Yes. Hope you guys enjoyed that. Three of us also recorded another video on the ideal girl, China versus the West, so you can watch it on Asian Beauty Secrets. Here's the link. Thank you guys for watching, and please help us share this video, and of course, comment below and let us know your thoughts on all this crazy stuff. Let us know what you think.