WHAT'S HAPPENING?!

Two, three, four. You're going to get it, obviously. Four. Get your face in there, all the way in there. Put your chin right there. That was awesome, man. Okay, man, go. Four. Let him eat some. My head's there. That was two. Tell everybody your number. Okay, you want me to tell them? Okay, what's your number? Three. Yep. Okay. I want you to lift up the coasters over there and tell me what's under it. What's it say? I knew you'd pick five. No, it doesn't. I'm just kidding, three. Wait, what? Thank you. Nice. Thank you very much. Okay. Thanks. Okay, Thomas, tell everybody your number. You want me to tell them my number? Wait, add number. Three, one, and four. Oh, one and four. Three's been picked. So, okay, what's your number? One. Okay. I want you to lift up that candle over there. I'll figure it out. So, since he likes two, two is up there, four is over there. I'm like, oh, okay, so there's four and a five numbers written. That is good. What number do you want? Between one and four? Four. Four? What does it say? Whoa! Come here! Chickens! Ross, come here, please. Look at him. Watch out. Oh! He just squishes it. Hi, Jordy. Chicken. Come on. He just like sat on it, dude. Thank you, Es. Let's see. Babe, that's huge! Look at Ezra. Oh, Ezra, or should I call you Mr. McGregor, huh? Or Peter Rabbit? I don't see any carrots. Do you see any? I don't see a carrot, though. Do you actually see? I believe you that there are carrots. Oh! Pfft! Ha ha ha! Shut up. I wasn't thinking, dude. So you just pull it? Oh my gosh, I'm so dumb. Wanna hear something so funny and ironic? The one that we decided to name Voldemort because it was so mean is now the nicest one. She is the only one that lets us hold her. Look at that afro. When Thomas has afro hair, they totally are twins. Look at that chicken. What's up, chicken? What's up? I hear some Sasquatches out here. Well, would you look at that? We got two and a half men downstairs. Was that yummy? Dude, I just got a freaking, I just got a, I just got a mosquito bite on my neck, though, dude. You didn't swear. That just irritated me so bad. Notice he always says excuse my language when he doesn't swear. But when he swears, I don't swear. He'll say the F word and I'll say, dude, you can't swear. I never even cussed. But then he said freaking and he goes, dude, excuse my language. I had a mosquito literally suck in my blood. That's how I got MRSA, bro. Swear on my life, that's how I got MRSA. Yeah, but I don't get that stuff, dude. Wait till your neck falls off. Gosh, if I got, could you imagine if I got that on my neck? You'd die. I might, dude, for real. I think so. I mean, it'd go right to your head and your brain and your heart. Yeah, but you absolutely can get MRSA from a mosquito. It wasn't from me scratching it and that. Thomas won't accept that he had it under his fingernails all this time. MRSA underneath his fingernails? Yeah. Well, I've prided myself my whole life. Like, I've only been to the hospital one time. It was for my tooth infection. Oh, yeah, when you almost died. I'm 29 years old, dude. I was born at home, never been to the hospital. What about your stitches in your hand? What about your stitches in your eyebrow? What about the time you fell out of a 30-foot window? What about your ankle? Oh, I got it one time on my ankle. My ankle, but my foot was up here, dude. I had it. You got stitches on your finger, dude. I'm a KD. Just thought of something, babe. We've never told our friends about that story. We told you guys, have we told you? It happened on New Year's Eve many moons ago, right after Milo was born. So, he was like two weeks old, three weeks old. I'm pretty sure we've told this story, though. I'm like 80% sure we've told this story. Ezra, were you here for this story? You weren't even born yet. So, I think you should hear the story. What do you think? So, check it. It all goes back to 2012, okay? 13. 12. It was just Thomas. Milo was born in 2013. The twins were born in 2012. Okay, so it's New Year's, 2013, hitting 2014, and all of a sudden, I start to lose feeling on the left side of my body, trying to walk up the stairs, and I can't use my left leg. I literally can't, so I collapse on the stairs. Well, my nephews are carrying me up the stairs to my bed, because I'm like, just take me to bed, and Ashley's tripping. You guys know Ashley, right? So, she's tripping. She's like, dude, we need to go to the emergency room. Takes me to the emergency room. Long story short, I'm in there for about an hour. Turns out, I got an infection in my tooth that pinches a nerve, because it gets swollen, and causes the whole left side of my body to go numb. Was it your left side of your mouth? Yeah, left side of my mouth, my cheek, my face, my ear, my arm, my leg. Oh, foot, arm. Everything, dude. Everything. He couldn't use anything. Dude, there's no way that puts you on the ground, dude. A toothache? Russ, he couldn't use his limbs. Like, he went paralyzed. It's just a little pain, bro. Don't just bite through it. What do you mean you couldn't do it? You pinched a nerve, you idiot. It wasn't pain. I didn't feel anything. It didn't hurt at all. I just couldn't use it. My tooth has been swollen for the last year. I'm walking around, dude. I'm walking around. First of all, teeth can't get swollen. They're swollen. And second of all, you're an idiot. I couldn't imagine having a toothache put me paralyzed. I couldn't imagine having a swollen tooth that would get you down to four or six inches. Come on, dude. Oh my gosh. You guys are so crazy. Have they heard my Rick Ross song? I don't know. I don't know if I've heard it. Have I heard Rick Ross? Get up close. They haven't heard it. I only did it on Instagram. No, I'm not gonna sit there and pound one hand like a freaking donkey. Okay, go. If you wanted to, this is my song I made for a video. Okay? Headed down to the trailer park where all the tweakers kicking in the middle of when I saw my cousin Ross and he wasn't walking so I pulled the band over. We started talking. I said, oh, Russell D, won't you come along to the mini mart where he bought a fifth of Jack and he started to, I don't remember. But he didn't do the beat that I asked. My name is Krusty and I'm feeling musty. He's getting jiggy with it. Everybody knows that my nickname's old Krusty. Woo woo woo. Woo.