Bernie Mac Original _Milk & Cookies_.

Walter Latham Comedy
1 follower
1 Video View·Nov 23, 2022
Bullshit. Let's discuss it.
Black folks don't know how to discuss ----.
Sit your motherfucking ass down.
Nappy-haired bastard.
I'm telling you, man, I got one daughter.
My daughter, 21 years old.
My daughter been in school for the last four years.
Anaheim. The last four years of my life,
me and my wife been swinging.
But I had to **** up two years ago.
I got three new additions in my ******* family.
Three new ******* kids.
My sister kids.
You know, I ain't ashamed. We family. We family.
You know, my sister on drugs.
Yeah, I ain't ashamed to tell you.
I got her kids.
You know, some of your family members fucked up.
You don't want to be looking at me all fucked up.
Your family fucked up, too.
I'm just happy to tell you about it.
Yeah, my brother gonna call me and say,
man, they're gonna take the kids.
So, you know, I said, no, I couldn't have that.
I came to court.
The judge gonna separate the kids.
You know, I should have let the judge do that,
but I didn't know.
No, I'm giving these motherfuckers back, man.
I ain't scared.
These motherfuckers get on my ******* nerve, man.
Three ******* new kids in my damn family.
Two, four, and six.
Oh, ----, come help me keep these motherfuckers.
Two and four.
And that two-year-old, she the ************.
See, that bitch, she worship the devil.
She the worker for the devil.
Oh, the four-year-old,
my sister must have really been getting high with her
because she don't say ----.
All she do is look at you.
I told her the other day, I said,
bitch, if a fire break out, boy,
you better have a whistle or a horn or something
or you gonna be a burned-up bitch-****** with me.
I ain't got time to look for no motherfucking law like this
and no goddamn fire.
Talk!
Deaf, mute.
Talk!
Fire blazes.
**** that.
And the six-year-old, he old homosexual.
Oh, ----.
Don't no six-year-old walk all like this here,
crying all the ******* time.
Usually, that's what's wrong with parents today.
You act like you don't see ----, you don't know ----.
You'll see your ******* kid.
You know your kid ain't no goddamn good.
This boy's a fag, six years old.
He gonna be a sissy,
just like on Good Time, Michael.
Oh, no.
**** that.
You knew Michael was a fag when he was singing,
when you're young and in love.
I said, that ************'s a sissy.
He a sissy.
Quit bullshit.
Quit playing with yourself.
Tell the ******* truth.
Truth will set you free.
So you play a game.
Michael ain't playing no goddamn game.
The boy's a sissy.
It hurt my heart.
Ain't nobody no sissy in our family.
This is the first one.
And the two-year-old, he do whatever the two-year-old tell him to do.
The two-year-old's the boss.
See, that's the one you gotta watch.
That's that little bitch.
There's something else.
That's how I talk to her, little bitch.
You little bitch.
**** that.
Time out with them.
These kids murderers today.
These motherfuckers kill the kids.
You ain't gonna kill me.
I'm gonna kill them.
I can see y'all reading Ebony, right?
And I can hear you talking.
It's a shame how Bernie Mac fucked up those kids.
Walking around the house, 2, 3 o'clock in the morning,
don't even go to bed and ----.
I have my pillow, my gun, right under my motherfucking pillow.
They come in the bedroom.
I said, what the **** you walking around for?
He's talking about, I can't sleep.
I said, keep ******* with me.
Keep ******* with me.
I came in the house the other day, man, 1 o'clock in the morning.
She gonna send the ************, one 6-year-old downstairs for some milk and cookies.
Ain't going, I'm going upstairs, he coming down.
He gonna walk past me like I'm a visitor, you know.
He just gonna walk past me like I ain't ----.
I'm babysitting.
I said, where you going, dude?
To get some milk and cookies.
That's how he said it.
I said, I wanted to hear him say it again.
I said, what?
To get some milk and cookies.
I said, you little bitch, it's too goddamn late for them motherfucking milk and cookies.
Faggot, go on back upstairs.
Switch your punk ass back upstairs.
Yeah, you can smack all you want, ************.
Put my foot in your ass.
That's how I talk to him.
He gonna go upstairs in the room, the 2-year-old gonna say,
where the cookies and ----?
He gonna tell her, him downstairs.
Who the **** is him?
Like I ain't got no name and ----, you know what I mean.
She gonna tell him, I'm gonna get this ---- myself.
She gonna come downstairs, old bow-legged ************,
show him a little bow-leg coming out of there,
looking like a raccoon and ----, you know what I mean.
I'll start to shoot that ************, you know.
She gonna open the refrigerator, get a little lighter.
I said, what you getting ready to do?
Get some milk and cookies.
I said, didn't I tell your motherfucking boy
you couldn't have no goddamn milk and cookies?
No, it's too goddamn late.
Go to the back of the **** upstairs
before you get fucked up down here.
She gonna look at me all up and down like I'm short, you know.
You know when somebody look at you like that, man.
You know what the **** that mean on the street.
So I said, what the **** you looking at?
Bust a move, bitch.
Bust a motherfucking move.
I ain't lying.
She gonna walk past me.
Whatever, whatever.
You better walk it off, bitch.
You better walk it off.
You ************, you.
