Dr. Joe Dispenza: How People Treat YOU Reflects How They Feel About Themselves

People who hate themselves will hate others and people who are angry with themselves will be angry at others people Who are impatient with others will be impatient with themselves will be a patient with others people Who are unhappy with themselves will punish other people until they feel unhappy It's just our nature as human beings, but when people are truly Grateful for themselves or for their life. They're they're they're grateful for others. So people who love themselves Naturally love others people who are okay finally with themselves are Okay with others, you know, it's just kind of how it is So one of the things that people have as a limitation To the understanding of love is that they're feeling something other than it and in order for us to find love A part of us must die. Oh Why why do we why do we need to die to find love or part of us because anything that's not loving us must die Oh, and that's the difference between knowing the path and walking the path, right? So So one of the things that We want to teach people in the work that we do is Understand how to manage their energy right in in how to manage their attention When you feel love Which is just a word by the way, and people have their own experience of what that is. You tend to feel more whole And when you feel more whole you tend to want less when you truly feel love It is very different than being selfish You're kind of more selfless and when you're in your heart, you're more prone to give more prone to care You're more prone to be present you're more prone to be grateful You're more prone to be kind. That's the consciousness of that Center. It is the the creative Center It's the union of opposites that's the union polarities is where oneness where divinity starts, right? There's can't be enough enough said about that Center. So if you just did an inventory of the amount of time you feel love during the day and The amount of time you feel other emotions like resentment or impatience or frustration or judgment Or jealousy any other one of those emotions that is the opposite of love Fear is fear is not the opposite of love. It is the separation from love a pain and suffering They're not the opposite or they're the separation from it that anger and hatred and hostility and violence They're not the opposite of love. They're the separation from love, right? So so then you're living in survival and living in survival is living in stress And living in stress produces a cocktail of chemicals and hormones that make you feel something other than love Turns out the majority of time people are feeling something other than love and they're feeling some of those other emotions So you only get good at what you practice? right and those emotions will drive certain human behaviors that from primarily universal and Will cause us to think in very predictable ways, right? So the separation from love because of an event or a trauma or whatever it is Causes people to view their life through a different lens than love, right? Okay, so Teach a person how to stop feeling those emotions of survival, right because in survival It's not a time to create. No when it's a when you're in survival. It's not a time to communicate That's not a time to learn. It's not a time to cooperate. It's not a time to get along It's time to run fight or hide and when you're in survival, you're very selfish you're self-indulgent You're self-important yourself a grand boxing and you're full of self-pity. It's all about the self or self and self-involved in so many ways and that means that once I'm okay, and I'm happy then Everybody else could be happy. And so In survival and we're feeling those emotions. We're doing everything we can to make that feeling go away Right, so it turns out that if you're in that state where you're in survival And it's not a time to create or not a time to love or not a time to open your heart. I'm not a time to learn You're compromised in a lot of ways so bring that into a relationship a relationship with peers with with co-workers with Relatives with family with a partner Then the fundamental question is Yeah, what would love do in a relationship? That's I think that's a really important question now we have different relationships with different people and because we've Had experiences with different people because we've had experiences with them We have neurological circuitry that is a memory that that we can relate to that person In fact, I see you based on the memory I have of you I'm filling in my idea of Lewis based on my memory of him I'm not really seeing you on see things how they are see things how I am Right, so your brain only can see it equal to how it's mapped. So based on my experience, I super like you You're a great guy. We get along we have a lot of things in common And and so I see you that way and the feeling that I have from my interactions with you Causes me to be attracted to you. Like if you're a cool guy, we hang out We have great conversations. And so when I see you there is a sense of love. There's an energy. There's a connection. There's Camaraderie, there's some kind of type of union, right? Those are healthy relationships and as long as we're We're honoring one another that relationship will continue and foster really great outcomes You have a relationship with someone like an ex or someone's betrayed you You have a different Memory of that person based on your experience which triggers a different of feeling right triggers a different feeling That's based on experience. And so then it makes sense then that the stronger the emotion you feel Towards that person the more you pay attention to them and where you place your attention is where you place your energy So you're giving your power away to change To that person or that circumstance and it's entirely possible That your reality is staying the same because your energy is the same And you in fact are contributing to that reality staying exactly unchangeable, right? So then you take a person and they've had a moderately difficult past Everybody's got a story but when does the story end, you know, right and now is the new later, right? I mean, it's it really is now is the new later Yeah, like if you want to change that now, okay, so the person understands fundamentally They haven't changed since those that event they're feeling the same emotion They felt from 20 years ago and somehow their their personality is in the past, right? okay, so the person then has to overcome that emotional state and so they're sitting in the meditation and as part of their identity and Meditation is getting beyond yourself. And as you're sitting there all of a sudden you start getting frustrated and angry and resentful towards your ex You one of two choices Just just go fully down that rabbit hole for the next hour and see how that feels in the end Or ask yourself. Is this loving to me? Justified or not. The only person it's gonna affect is me. Okay loving to me or for me That was it was on either one, right? Okay, so if I could in my meditation really say, okay, this isn't loving to me I know this isn't right I don't know. I want to make them wrong I'm just gonna work. I'm gonna work on settling my body down from that emotional state if I'm successful at Regulating that emotion and no longer allowing the body to feel that emotion I'm inhibiting that thought and feeling that image and emotion breaking that conditioning response If I if I'm successful at doing that if I lower the volume to that emotion I'm gonna take my attention off that person or problem Which means I'm gonna be taking my power back right because I'm gonna drop my energy. I'm gonna build my own field, right? I'm I'm no longer giving them My power to change energetically. I'm no longer giving them my attention my energy If I overcome the emotion, I'll take my attention off that person and I'll begin to build my own electromagnetic field Now there's energy to create now. There's energy to heal now There's energy for a whole new future and and lo and behold when you lower the volume to that emotion You take your attention off that person. That's forgiveness Wow, because if you don't feel the emotion any longer then you no longer have it your attention on that person and your life truly changes You'll never hold on to that emotion again in order for us to find love a part of us must die Why do we need to die to find love a part of us because anything that's not loving us must die Oh, and that's the difference between knowing the path and walking a path Well, the people that you've seen have successful long-term relationships