9 in 10 Divorced Chinese Women Regret It! They Thought They Were a Catch—Now Everyone Laughs

In recent years, short-form videos promoting harmful relationship advice to women have become widespread in China, contributing to rising divorce rates. Unfortunately, as these women reveal, 9 out of 10 divorced women end up regretting. it seems like 80 percent of divorces these days are initiated by women but within half of one year about half of them start regretting and want to get back together the problem is by then the situation has completely reversed now it's the men who don't want to reconcile when divorce first comes up a lot of men are reluctant they don't want all that trouble unless things have reached to the breaking point they don't want to sign those papers but once the divorce is final they really don't want to get back together the woman regret it and beg their ex-husbands to take them back meanwhile the men have already started new lives they're happy every day they have hobbies again they can even afford to smoke better cigarettes after spending eight to ten years with these women they had no savings but two or three years after the divorce guess what they have money in the bank. What makes it harder for these women to accept is what happens after the divorce. Friends and relatives who once seemed supportive and who encouraged them to leave their husbands and find true love offer no real help. Instead, some are secretly laughing at their misfortune. Before you get divorced, every time you argue with your husband, your best friend tells you to leave him. Your parents tell you to leave. Your relatives and friends say the same thing. even people who have nothing to do with their marriage jump in and encourage you to get divorced. They keep feeding you all this toxic advice. But let me ask you something. After you divorce, what have any of these people done for you? Are they paying your rent? Are they putting food on your table? Are they paying your children's tuition? Ladies, wake up. They're secretly laughing at you. Many couples divorce in the heat of the moment after arguing over everyday household matters, convinced that they simply aren't compatible. Some women, influenced by unrealistic online stories and misleading relationship advice, believe they can easily find someone more understanding, more caring, and wealthier after divorce. Some even imagine receiving a generous bride price if they remarry. But when they enter the remarriage market, reality comes as a harsh shock. People say divorced women with children are in high demand even if they have a son. Don't believe that for a second. I've been divorced for years and I'm raising a son. My own experience tells me that no man wants to take that on. It doesn't matter how pretty you are, how good your personality is, or how hard you work to build a good life. The moment a man hears you have a son, the conversation ends. Or he'll tell you directly that he can't afford to raise him. So for divorced women with sons, getting remarried is really, really hard. nine out of ten divorced women are dreaming about the same thing they want to find a rich man so they can live comfortably for the rest of their lives but here's the reality you have to face if you want a rich man what exactly does he want from you your age the child you're raising or all your debts don't get upset and don't take this personally this is the harsh reality do you think genuinely successful men have trouble finding women they have plenty of young beautiful women to choose from women without emotional baggage why would they pass up those options and choose someone who's already been worn down by life the world is realistic everything is an exchange of equal value if one side is doing all the giving it won't last who has a harder time finding someone to marry again divorced men or women Honestly, it's women. Because men and women approach remarriage very differently. A man who's financially well-off is willing to date someone younger or more attractive. A man with average or limited finances may look for someone a little older, with a good personality, who can meet his emotional and physical needs. He's content with that. But divorced women are different. They don't want a man who's poor, unattractive, has children, is stingy, has low emotional intelligence, is short, is overweight, doesn't make an effort, has no money or has poor hygiene. In the end, they reject everyone. That's why so many divorced women remain single. Meanwhile, the more successful a man is, the easier it is for him to find someone. But the more successful a woman is, the harder it becomes. Divorced men and women have completely different plans when they remarry. A man who's already been through one failed marriage just wants someone he can build a stable life with. Someone who will face problems with him. Share the good times and be there when he's tired. All he wants is peace and stability but most women entering a second marriage have their own agenda. They feel they didn't get the good life they deserved in their first marriage so they want everything handed to them the second time around. They want your money and affection. They expect you to give in to them on everything but they don't want to contribute or share the burden. They expect you to make up for everything their ex-husband failed to give them. They say they want to build a good life together, but they're always calculating what they can get out of it. They take everything you do for granted and act as if they're entitled to whatever they demand. The slightest disappointment makes them angry. At the first disagreement, they lose their temper. They never really intend to spend the rest of their lives with you. Successful men are unlikely to accept being taken advantage of by demanding partners. As a result, desirable men become increasingly sought after as they get older, while women with high expectations will contribute little, may ultimately find themselves growing old alone, filled with regret and resentment. Some women also believe that if they can't find someone better, they can simply remarry their ex-husbands, but that option often isn't available either. i've been divorced for five years i want to tell sisters to think very carefully before getting divorced don't rush into it just escape some temporary pain thinking you can get divorced first and get back together if things didn't work out because your ex-husband may have already closed that door in our country 73 percent of divorces are initiated by women many women ask for a divorce when their emotions reach a breaking point they feel hurt and want their husbands to fight for the marriage and show they care. They're acting out of frustration. But when a man finally agrees to divorce, it usually means he's tried everything and has no regrets left. He's made his final decision. The moment he signs those papers, he's already moved on emotionally. That's why you'll find that almost no divorced men are looking to reconcile. Men who are doing well financially, like my ex-husband, find someone new in less than six months. They move straight into another relationship and live comfortably. Men who aren't doing as well learn to enjoy life on their own. They have freedom, peace, and nobody telling them what to do. They love it. Think about it. Why would a man who's already settled everything and moved on, who's enjoying his freedom after divorce, want to marry a demanding, difficult woman again? Ladies, problems in marriage can be discussed. You can argue and you can work things out, but don't use divorce as a weapon when you're angry. Getting divorced first and figuring things out later can be the most expensive mistake you make because once you take that step, there's no going back. In China, another distinctive cause of divorce is excessive financial support given by married women to their parents and siblings. When that support exceeds what their husbands can tolerate, the marriage can fall apart. In recent years, the Chinese internet has popularized the term fu di mo, brother enabler referring to women deeply influenced by their family's preference for sons these women are willing to sacrifice their own marriages and happiness to financially support their younger brothers help them establish families and carry on the family line if they refuse their parents may even pressure or force them to divorce my husband was making 50,000 yuan a month but he refused to help my younger brother pay his mortgage of a little over 2,000 yuan per month. My mom encouraged me to threaten him with divorce to force him but we ended up actually getting divorced. Back then I was absolutely convinced my ex-husband would come crying and begging me to take him back. Instead reality hit me hard. The day I moved back into my parents house my brother was sitting in the living room complaining that nobody was going to pay his mortgage anymore. My mom joined in criticizing my ex-husband for being heartless. Her husband who loved her and did everything he could to make her happy gave up on the marriage completely when they signed the divorce papers. Within six months he had found a new girlfriend yet when the woman returned to his parents home she received no sympathy. Her parents and brother blamed her for being useless and losing their main source of financial support. Now nobody was paying 2000 yuan monthly mortgage. One day she ran into her ex-husband at a shopping mall. He was walking hand in hand with his new girlfriend and treated her like a complete stranger. She broke down in tears of regret i ran home and screamed at my mom i blamed her for pushing me into the divorce she said she never imagined things would turn out this way all she could do was sigh now every time i look in the mirror i want to slap myself i finally realized how stupid i was all because of my brother's mortgage payments i drove away a man who had treated me like a treasure there's no way to undo what i've done all i can do is grit my teeth and watch my ex-husband live happily with another woman. Well, I've lost the happiness I once had. Please don't make the same mistake I did. Marriage isn't a charity program for supporting your relatives. If you can't understand that, sooner or later, you'll pay the price. The next woman found herself caught in a more unusual situation. After being manipulated by her best friend, what was supposed to be a fake divorce turned into a real one. Lin, a 31-year-old highly educated woman, had a respectable job and a husband with a doctorate who earned 20,000 yuan a month. When her 63-year-old father became caught up in an illegal fundraising scam and demanded 600,000 yuan from the couple, Lin thought she had found a clever solution. She and her husband legally divorced, intending it to be only a temporary arrangement to avoid her father's financial demands. She thought it was just a temporary solution, but after receiving her divorce certificate and enjoying her newfound freedom for a few days, Lynn was encouraged by her best friend who had ulterior motives to explore life as a single woman. Driven by curiosity and excitement, she secretly attended a late-night party full of single men without telling her ex-husband. Before long, her ex-husband discovered flirtatious messages on her phone. Furious, he moved out and firmly ended their relationship. Even then, Lynn foolishly believed her husband was overreacting. It wasn't until a matchmaker reminded her that she began to reconsider. Could all this have been carefully planned by her best friend? Lin finally realized what had happened. Her best friend, who always seemed to have her best interests at heart, had secretly wanted her highly educated husband all along. She had encouraged Lin to divorce and led her into the trouble. After Lin separated from her husband, the friend quickly blocked her on social media and went on to marry her ex-husband. What Lin thought was a clever temporary divorce had played straight into her friend's hands, ending in a real betrayal that could no longer be undone. As China's economic downturn continues, layoffs and pay cuts have become a constant concern for families. Many husbands already face enormous pressure to provide financially. When their wives over-control and show little understanding of their stress and suffering, their marriage may eventually break down. Let's get a divorce. Are you out of your mind? Why do you want a divorce? I'm exhausted. I was thinking about just leaving today, but then I figured I should at least tell you first. Leaving? Where would you go? I don't want to live like this anymore. What kind of life? What's wrong with your life? You've got food on the table, drinks whenever you want, a child and a wife. Do you know how many people dream of having a life like yours? Why are you acting like a depressed teenager? I'm under too much pressure. Who's putting pressure on you? There's pressure right here in this family. What pressure is this family putting on you? When your parents get sick, I have to pay their medical bills. I have to support you and our child. There's a mortgage to pay. I've taken a pay cut. And now my investors have failed too. I'm really exhausted. You're tired? Keep going. If this keeps going, my mental health is going to fall apart. So you're going to run away? Escape? I can't keep living like this. All these years of pressure have pushed me to the edge of mental breakdown. Are you really that weak? You're a big, strong, grown man. You're this fragile? A few hundred thousand yuan is enough to break you? Look at you, so miserable and defeated, acting like the world's coming to an end. It's only a few hundred thousand yuan. People out there deal with much bigger problems. This is the last straw. Who's putting all this pressure on you? I've been under pressure for years. I've had enough. How exactly have I pressured you? Go ahead, explain in details. I want to hear exactly what I've done to make you feel pressured. Don't you think you're too controlling? How am I controlling? I'm just independent. For years, I've been telling you how exhausted I am and that I can't take it anymore. But you're always telling me to keep pushing through for the child and the family. Exactly. Who doesn't keep going for their children? Everybody does. Go out on the street and ask random people. But what if I can't keep going? What if I really can't take it anymore? No, no. Life is a battlefield. That's exactly what it is. You're on the battlefield now. Understand? You have to keep fighting. Keep fighting. You can't be a deserter. How are we going to solve this problem? It's easy for you to say. I'm the one carrying all the pressure of earning money. Of course you think it's no big deal. It's not like you're making a fortune, okay? We're just an ordinary family living an ordinary life. But I'm carrying a mountain on my shoulders. What mountain? Have I asked you to make hundreds of millions of yuan for me to spend? What about the money spent for the child? Where am I supposed to find all this money? If you can't make it all now, take your time and keep working. I don't want to keep doing this. I just want to leave. Leave? You think you can do whatever you want in this world? What about our child? You're not thinking about the child anymore? Fine. You can leave if you want, but only if you're a single man with no family, then you can go wherever you please. Isn't the 1 million yuan I'm giving you enough? What more do you want? You're giving me 1 million yuan. Do you think I can just take the money and spend it all on myself? We have a child together, understand? We have a child. Stop using our child to pressure me every day. I've had enough. Is our child a burden to you? Was our child born just to put pressure on you? Hasn't our child brought you any joy or happiness? I feel like a donkey. You're behind me every day, whipping me to keep moving. I'm not even allowed to say I'm tired. The moment I complain, you whip me again. I don't want to live another day like this. I just want to run away. I want to escape this life. Can't I do that? No, absolutely not. This conversation between a couple on the verge of breaking down reflects the struggles facing countless families in China today. One user commented beneath the video, This is honestly suffocating. No wonder people don't want to get married anymore. The recent study attributed to Xi'an Jiao Tong University suggest that the higher the bride price, the higher the divorce rate. For couples whose bride price was below 50,000 yuan, the divorce rate within five years was just 9.8% to 12%. For bride prices between 100,000 and 120,000 yuan, the divorce rate rose to 42%. When the bride price exceeded 200,000 yuan, the divorce rate reached 49.8%. And for bride prices above 300,000 yuan, over 70% of couples divorce within just six months of getting married. These figures also point to a troubling issue behind China's high divorce rate. Essentially, any excessively high bride price turns marriage into a transfer of wealth, a business transaction with a fixed price tag. The groom's family may have to drain its savings, sell possessions, or even borrow money to cover the enormous payment. This can create an imbalance in the relationship from the very beginning for the bride the higher the bride price the more unrealistic her expectations for married life may become she may believe that because her family receives so much money she deserves a comfortable life without having to struggle she expects her husband to provide an affluent lifestyle without limits but everyday life eventually settles into an ordinary routine when her husband can no longer meet her endless material demands the disappointment can be overwhelming. She may start threatening divorces whenever things don't go her way believing that with the bride price money in hand she'll still be highly sought after and can easily find a better husband. For the husband however paying such enormous bride price has already exhausted his patience and goodwill. When his wife repeatedly threatens divorce over minor disagreements he may eventually become emotionally drained and conclude that she is motivated by greed. At that point, he may decide to walk away coldly to cut his losses. A marriage built on financial transactions rather than genuine affection can ultimately end in bitter conflict, leaving both sides with broken relationships and financial losses.