10 signs you have ＂traumatic intelligence＂ Is it the rarest and most powerful form of smart？

All of my life I thought there was something wrong with me. In fact, I remember saying to my mom in my mid-40s, I just think too much and feel too much. And it was not in a positive way. It was like I cannot turn it off. This compulsively, you know, what did that mean? And why did they say that? And how do I feel? And what should I do? Just all the time in my brain. And I came across this collection of videos recently talking about a term called traumatic intelligence, which is actually not a clinical term. What it really is talking about is that it's about learning to become more emotionally intelligent, more hyper aware, and often hyper responsive to your environment because you grew up learning that predictability was not easily coming your way. And the brain loves predictability. In fact, that is what our brains do. They make predictions. So it talks about in these videos, this being the rarest form of intelligence, but it's not really what they're saying it is. So we're going to go through 10 of the most common things that can happen to you when you grow up in a highly unpredictable environment. And I would argue that many of these things can be strengths. I'll make another video about the downside because there's a lot as well. But I do think it's important for us to be able to say, you know what, there are things I can do and I'm not sugarcoating this or glossing over trauma and be like, oh, well now you're resilient. But it is true. There are some things about you that this set of skills that your traumatic childhood and or your neurodivergent brain or both, probably both if you're watching me, have given you. And because something like 70% of the world's population has experienced some form of significant trauma, psychological trauma, this means that it's not so rare. But for many people, not only do they have the one big event in life, their whole childhood or their relationships, something in their life has repeatedly been traumatizing. And so when your brain grows up in these environments, this is what can happen to you. Number one, you often are someone who walks in a room and you can just read the vibes and read the energy. Whether you want to or not, your brain is picking up on everything, the air, the temperature, the verbal, nonverbal communication, the smells, the sounds. And you can walk in a space and sort of essentially know what's happening. You know, is this a good space, a bad space? In fact, you might be overly attuned to feeling like, I don't feel safe here. And that would be common if you've had a lot of trauma, a lot of unpredictability in childhood, because when that happens, you become a threat predictor. So that threat predictor becomes one of the tools you use to collect data in your brain and read the tea leaves or vibes or energy of a room. Number two, as a result, you often are able to, because of this unpredictability in childhood and often intense emotions or the silent treatment, whatever it was, there were often a lot of feelings that were sort of like this. And so you can, whether you want to or not, again, absorb other people's emotions. In fact, it can feel like there is no barrier between you. And that can be really overwhelming, especially if you're worried about someone or afraid, or they're upset with you. Are you mad at me? Are you okay? The benefit is that as a result of doing that, you can also use that to modify and shapeshift what you're doing when you absorb what other people are doing or feeling. And so it can make you someone who's able to be in touch with other people's emotions, and it can help you survive because it already did. If you developed this in childhood. Number three, you are intensely connected to your senses. Some may be more than others, but maybe it's the sound of things or texture. You're very aware of those things, that information, and you use that when you're reading the vibes. But because of that sensory sensitivity, and perhaps maybe you were just born with a more sensitive temperament, and you had this environment where it was unpredictable, you are more sensitive in general. This is part of the whole HSP, the highly sensitive person for many people. Yes, it can be part of the way your brain was formed in utero, but essentially you are a very sensitive person to the world, to people, to art, to the environment. It can be overwhelming too, like I'm saying, but at the core, it can be an important strength. Number four is that you are good at analyzing yourself and as someone else in an environment. So while we're talking, I could sometimes miss what you're saying because I'm overly focused on picking up on the vibe you're sending, or what I'm doing with my body, or how I'm responding, and that can feel like a bit of sort of their and not their dissociation. But essentially, we use that data if we're going to modify and mask, let's say, whether it's from trauma or autism, ADHD, that we're sort of, I always say, in the room, we're like in there, but we're also hovering over you and ourselves. So it can make you really good at that. Number five, which is solving cases in terms of what's happening in an environment. It can make you really good at post-interaction analyzing. So because you often do this, you ruminate before, during, and after things, your brain is often really good at making connections to things and figuring things out. You might not always understand what was happening in someone's emotions, but you're really good at that sort of solving, oh, I know why she was upset, or whatever was going on, or at least coming up with potential reasons why. So you have this skill in your post-analysis that you do. Number six is that as a result of all this, you're very calm in crises. Your brain learned to operate under duress in terms of walking in rooms and being around caregivers or siblings or relationships, whatever it is. So as a result, when things get really bad, you get calm. I've shared before that my daughter will faint on the way to the ER. I'll get really calm, like, okay, I'm going to pick you up. We're going to get in the car. The ambulance is coming. Now, I will freak out later, but in that moment, I'm really good. Number seven is that as a result of all of this, and I mentioned this in the beginning, but we take all of this data that we're always absorbing because we learn to do it no matter what, and it can help us adapt to really uncomfortable things for short periods of time. It's really about being a survivor, and I'm sure long periods of time you could probably survive better too, but it's this thing where you know how to suppress how much you're freaking out and adapt, like I just said, when it requires. Number eight is that you're more aware of risk and threat, and so you might actually be someone who, at least if you're sober, is less likely to engage in threats. Now, you might be engaging in substance abuse or numbing or workaholism, all kinds of things to deal with having a brain like this, but you're not intentionally trying to engage in risk. In fact, it can actually make you more fearful of things and more hesitant because you are just assessing risk and all possible scenarios all of the time. Number nine is that you have a pretty good developed sense of gut feelings or what's called intuition, and if you learn to listen to it, which many of us have been taught to disregard, but because of all of that information and data our brain had to always be aware of, if we learn to connect to it, it can be very helpful to sculpt and connect to and realize that something isn't right or, you know, even in retrospect, many of us will say, I knew I shouldn't have done that, right? That's a common thing regardless of how your brain works, but you can have an overdeveloped sense of intuition and gut feelings, and if you know that about yourself, it can be useful to learn to trust or at least engage with more. And lastly is that you, as a result of all of this, you can actually be good at being alone. As I've said for many of us, not all, whether it's trauma, neurodivergence, whatever, but we're talking about specifically those things today, is that when you are alone, you don't have to be on and you don't have to predict threat and make sense of everything all the time, and so you can be really good at doing things on your own and being alone. It is a strength in many ways because it helps you not necessarily always need someone else. It can become a challenge if you detach and isolate versus intentionally engage in doing things on your own or seeking or crafting solitude, so we want to keep an eye out for that because all of these are forged out of trauma, and it would make sense that we might struggle with depression, PTSD, all kinds of dynamics, but when we're talking about being more self-reliant or doing things on our own, if you're aware of the threat and risk and you had to manage that on your own as a kid especially, it can manifest in anxiety and fear of being alone, but it can also manifest in being really good at doing things on your own and taking risks and being able to be okay with yourself because that is when you feel safest. I love when these terms pop up and so I wanted you to feel empowered and I hope this helps reduce some of the weight we carry and being told that, you know, why are you so sensitive and it's so bad and you're always thinking people are mad at you. It's like, okay, I can work on that, but there is something about my hypersensitivity and maybe empathy and awareness that can actually be really powerful in our lives and relationships, and so I thought I'd share that with you. Thanks for being here. Have a beautiful day. I hope you'll follow me on Substack, TikTok, and Instagram. I'm doing a series on borderline parents. On my Substack, I'm writing about disorganized attachment and attachment in general, doing some deep dives on some things you might not have heard about, so check those out, and I'm starting, I think, a new series. We'll see, which I'll share soon on just helping reparent and love on yourself just a little bit more, all right, especially today and right now. It's a lot. I know it's a lot, so take good care. Have a good day, and I'll see you soon. Bye.