HELLO AUGUST!! A Big ASOS Haul, Where I've Been & Book Updates | Suzie Bonaldi

Now that is better. Just let it be known, you can still see floor in here, guys. This is probably the longest that you've been able to see carpet consistently in here, or at least 80% of the carpet, because I'm not going to pretend I didn't just have to clean up a lot. Partly because I have an ASOS order right at our feet that my child decided it would be just great if it was everywhere, everywhere. Every single piece of packaging, every single item of clothing, strewn everywhere. So I actually need to do the return part of this order, because there's some things that I'm not going to keep. But I thought I would show you what I got. Do excuse me, it's like I'm just not doing makeup today, because there's no need. It's her hair wash day, so on Delilah's next nap, when I have her in the afternoon on her nap, I will do my hair wash. So there's just absolutely zero point in putting makeup on. So I've just got La Roche-Posay SPF, tiny bit of brows, and then I did have a lip on. It's gone, along with any form of mattness on my face, because I'm sweating. Let me show you what I have bought. I know you guys are loving a little ASOS moment as much as I am at the moment. Literally everything that I am wearing at the moment is from ASOS, and everything that I wear is from ASOS. You guys are like, where is that from? I'm glad we're all on the same page with our stylistic choices. First thing, I don't really need to try on, because you've seen it to death at this point. This really got me through the heatwave, I can't lie, because I was suffering. I think after giving birth in a heatwave, and recovering from surgery in a heatwave, and having the postpartum hot sweats in a heatwave last year, it triggers my anxiety a lot. So I really, if you think I'm wearing less clothing than ever when it's hot now, it's because I actually can't cope. I used to love being warm, and now I don't love being warm, and it's really sad. But anyway, this really got me through, so it's just like a cute top. And then, quite short shorts, I won't lie, they're not the longest. I do wear them a bit lower to get a little bit of extra length out of them. If you wore them really, really high-waisted, you'd have butt cheek out. So wear them however you want, but I wear them a little bit lower so that they're not too short, because no one needs to see my bum. Apparently people are offended enough at the moment by seeing my boobs. Guys, I haven't had a boob job. I just need to let it be known, I haven't had a boob job. It's the Grace Beverly effect. Tala make the best tops, like every single top in the last vlog, I believe, in terms of active wear was Tala. And they make my non-existent boobs look great. Though I will say, they seem to have like bounced back a little bit recently. Like the volume seems, I was due one in the last vlog for a lot of it, but the volume does seem to have like come back to my boobs a tiny amount. So if you've had a baby and you're thinking that like they're just going to be down on the ground forever, I actually do think they do seem to be recovering. Let it be known I will never, ever, ever, ever have a boob job. I know you are not awake for that surgery, but after having had surgery and being awake for it, I never, unless it's a life-threatening situation, never letting anyone near my body without good reason. Never, ever. Like I would, I remember being so sad postpartum when my boobs looked really, really bad. Like I would wear bras and they'd just go like horizontal, sausage-y, it didn't matter what I wore. It didn't matter. But pre-baby, I would have just been like, yeah, let's book a boob job. It's fine. Everything is fine. And then I felt like really stuck with boobs I didn't like because I couldn't surgically get myself out of that situation. And a little patience just does go a long way. I'm really happy with where they're at at the moment and I don't feel super self-conscious about them. And I have got to the point where like some days I'm like, I don't need a bra again. And that's really nice. Like not needing a bra, not just in terms of size, but like they look fuller, which is gorgeous. Moving on. I bought this little top and I actually need to try this on because I haven't tried this one on yet. But it's like a cute little thing. Oh, I'm not sure that's going to fit. This is the only grab I have with Asos at the moment. Sometimes I buy things from them. The sizing discrepancy across items is not fantastical. I bought a little gingham dress the other day in my size and buying lots of things in that size that fit. And it honestly was like, it had been made for a child. It's Motel. That's why. That brand has always made things for children. Anyway, I would quite like it if this would fit because it's really cute. I think it's really nice and simple and with a pair of capris. I'm wearing my active wear capris at the moment, but it gives you the same vibe, you know. Is it going to look a little bit stretchy maybe? So I probably wouldn't do this the whole way up, but I just have to. Perfect. It's definitely cinching. I don't think it's meant to be this cinched. It's not a look I'm opposed to, as we all know. Oh God, I'm going to be here for a hundred years, but it is cute. I would not have been able to do this with my long nails. I haven't showed you. No one say I told you so. No one say it. Just hold on to it. Hold on to your thoughts. I feel like they look so good. And like, I don't feel like my fingers look stubby. I used to think my fingers would look so stubby. I don't feel like they look stubby at all. They look so nice. I feel so sophisticated. I'm not going to say elegant because I haven't had another run on that. Everyone at the moment in my comments keeps saying to me, this isn't, you don't look elegant. This isn't an elegant style. I don't want to look elegant, partly because I actually don't think that's physically possible for me to look elegant. And also this is my gripe with people being like, look elegant. If I were a six foot model, I would put things on and people would probably think that it looked elegant. Like if I had a model body, like my body's great. But like if I had a model, stereotypical model body, I think there's a lot of things that I would wear and people would be like, that looks really elegant. But because I am five foot nothing, whilst being a slim woman, I have a slightly more hourglass slash now pear shaped figure. It doesn't lend itself to looking elegant. It just doesn't. And I also maybe don't want to always, I'm a child in a 30 something, don't even remember how old I am anymore, woman's body. And I don't want to always look elegant. I don't actually think I've ever looked at something and thought that will look really elegant and that's the reason I'm going to go for it. Maybe like once on a Lancome trip and I wore that white dress and I actually wanted to look elegant. I didn't even want to look elegant on my wedding day. I wanted to look so fun. So yeah, that's not why I'm doing like people, some people are like, this still doesn't look elegant. I don't care. I don't care if I wear too much jewellery and it doesn't look elegant. And I don't care if you didn't like what I wore to Amelia's wedding because it doesn't look elegant. People are like, this dress is so cheap. I was like, that is a self portrait dress. Do you know how much that dress cost me? Sorry, whilst I'm on my rants, because this is, this ties in. I was told multiple times by multiple people that I did not look elegant at that wedding and it wasn't the vibe I was going for. That's never the vibe I'm going for. The shapewear underneath, that's part of the dress. Moral of the story being, stop trying to make me look elegant. There is a sunny angel next to my chilly high heels and the heart Jimmy Chews in a metallic mint. Do I look like the type of girl who's trying to be elegant? No! And that's not what I'm going for with this nice simple white top either because the boobs are boobing. And I like it like that. Anyway, I like this top. I think it's cute. A little bit see-through. We can cut that label out. I've got to get myself out of this top. It'll probably take me another rant to get out of it. I'm going to follow up my rant about not being elegant with a lemon strapless top. This is a little bit roomy, so it goes a bit bumpy. But my friends, that is because this is a side large. I have the small and it's one of those ones where it zips to here and then stops. So I'd have to go... Or with the small I couldn't... I had to... All well and good, but couldn't get it off me because my shoulders are wider than my waist. Tale as old as time. You know it's happened to me multiple times in Zara items because they do it a lot. I got stuck in it. And then got a big makeup smudge on it trying to get it off. So not really sure what I'm going to do with that now because I don't know if they'll let me return it. I went to order the medium. Medium sold out. So I got the large. And the large actually fits over my bum. It's so cute and I love... I'm obsessed with the yellow at the moment. I'm really trying not to overdo it because I have a tendency to do that and I always regret it. I always end up buying multiple things in the same colour when I like a style of top and then I wear them because there's too many of the same one thing that I like. So I'm trying not to overdo it but I do love a bandeau and I really like yellow. So here we are. Oh, also lemon yellow in my ASOS order. Just got a pair of flippy floppies because I didn't want to get a boring white and I felt like white would get really dirty as well. Yeah, I just love a pair of Javianas. I had a black pair last summer and they even made it home from hospital with me. They got lost in the hospital and still returned to me and then they made it home and now they're lost. Got these as well. They're really cute and they've got like a jelly flippy floppy section. I also got this top. I thought this could be cute for like date night. So let's try that. Got this in a size 8. Fits perfect. I really like the little seam under here. It kind of gives a nice little bit of support. So cute. I'm going to keep that. That'll be really nice with a midi skirt as well. Do excuse, you can see my nips through this one a little bit but I'm loving these tops at the moment. I have one in like an ecru colour and then this is like a pure white with a little bit of a bell sleeve. I think the other one I have is from Topshop and ASOS but this one has like a wider neckline which is kind of nice. I love this style of top again with a capri or a midi skirt but also just nice with jeans as well. This could actually be really cute with this very impulse-y purchase. Can you tell I'm really liking a gingham at the moment? I don't know if I like these though but we will, yeah no I'm already holding on to myself and I hate them. Maybe it's the top. Maybe I need like a slightly more barely there top to kind of give these the vibe. I wanted, I was going for more Sabrina Carpenter in capris than like an anthropology mum wearing capris. Both are gorgeous. One I was aiming for and the other I wasn't. These actually are too big at the back so that kind of makes my mind up for me. They are kind of cute though. I don't know. No. Do you know what? If I don't know, if I'm not like yeah love, we ain't keeping it. We're changing our ways. Final item. Oh my god this is a skort. Love. That's so good. Wow. Didn't have the highest hopes for this in terms of like getting the most wear but a skort now we're talking. So cute. Now I'm not sure. I originally was like nah it's a bit meh but now I don't know. It's cute but it's probably not in the running for Silverstone. Got Silverstone on Saturday, Wimbledon Sunday. My friend Ellie is coming along for the ride for both. She needs to prepare to be sick of me by Monday. I don't think I'm going to go with this but it's really cute. It's actually from Good American but they're on Asos now. I also got the best t-shirt. You may have seen this on my Instagram because I posted it on stories literally the second I got it. It actually looks so cute with the skort but I love this so much. I'm going to wear this until it literally falls apart. It's so good. This Skims bra is giving real actual fake cleavage boob job. It's a full on like padded. I have a few padded bras from them but this is like outrageously padded. Like it's doubled the size. Can't lie though, I kind of love that with a t-shirt. Especially like this 90s style t-shirt. But that is everything that I bought this week. I actually bought it last week. So this is everything that I'm buying slash returning this week. So we are going to be returning the gingham capris. On the fence about that gingham skirt because I love the fact that it's a skort and it did look really cute with my t-shirt. I just don't get to wear a mini as much. Like a midi is so much easier day to day. Definitely returning the top half though. Even though it's such a look I just don't have that much in my diary. Like I have good stuff in my diary this summer but it's not like outrageously full where I just need like outfits upon outfits. Like you know backup outfits and things like that. I actually really like at the moment the way my diary works post baby. Like the things I have in my diary are really really good. They come in quite far in advance and I can like really plan out what I'm going to wear and I am so much more organised than I used to be now. Partly because I have to be. And I just like make sure I know what I'm wearing a month in advance for every event. And then I don't really need to like randomly buy stuff like at the last minute because I just know, I just know what I'm wearing. It's so nice. Quickly before I have to go and take over and be mommy. I would like to just take a moment for my book sack. That is right here. We need a book update. I actually just skimmed through last week's vlog or last month's vlog and I don't feel like I really delved into the books that much and like updated you on things I've read. I mean I am going to start posting my reviews to shorts but if you don't follow me on TikTok or Reels you probably won't see like I do a little update every time I finish a book and kind of like tell you what I've read in like a month and stuff like that depending on how much I've read. So I thought I would talk you through. Firstly some things that I have finished. Finished Poisoned Daughter and I don't believe I've talked about this. Like I said I did just skim really quickly through last week's vlog and I can't remember if I talked about this in the one before. But I would like to confirm just in case I haven't. I have finished Poisoned Daughter. I loved this. It does come with like a lot of trigger warnings. It touches on abuse so if you are one of those people that just doesn't really want to delve into that check the trigger warnings. But I feel like a lot of romance-y fantasy like there's a trigger warning with every single one of them so do always just check. I really enjoyed this though. It was very spicy. I know there's mixed feelings on the ending but I personally really liked it. I feel like it wrapped up well. There were a few like things that were kind of I was kind of like we didn't really get to that but overall I really enjoyed it. I would give it like an 8 out of 10. House of Flame and Shadow, the third book in the Crescent City series. We've done this for Book Club. We did one to three and I'm so sad it's over. We've moved on now and it's just so jarring reading a fantasy that isn't written by SJM. I obviously did Poisoned Daughter and that was absolutely fine in it. There's a little glossary of like powers at the beginning of this and I thought that was tricky but my new read that we will move on to in a second that's even my brain is going to be scrambled. But anyway I just love the Crescent City series. I don't understand people that have been honestly some people really in the beginning discouraged me not to read it. It is a must read. It is a must read and I can't believe that what happens in this won't factor into Akita 6 or 7. Like if SJM manages to like just not touch on that at all if you've read it you'll know you'll know why. There's no way that this what goes on in this can just be ignored unless she manages to weave it in in like a way that people that haven't read Crescent City could still grasp it. But then I'm like would that be really boring for those of us that have read it? Will we recap too much? Who knows? Anyway loved it. I loved this series so much. I would give the whole series as a whole a 10 out of 10. This book an 8.5 slash 9. An 8.5 slash 9. There is one dozen in this that I'm like that didn't get wrapped up. Like what has happened to that person? I feel like this is a finished series so it's kind of random that that person just we didn't get a follow up. But yeah anyway loved it. Loved it. So sad that that's over. And all the book club girlies absolutely smashed this. There was one girl I have to give a shout out to Nikki. I don't know if she watches the vlogs or just follows me on other platforms. But when we realised that to read this third book you would absolutely must have read Akatar. Otherwise like you can't enjoy this book in my opinion. Like you just can't. It would make no sense. It makes me understand why some people don't love this because I know there are people that have read this without reading Akatar and I'm like no wonder you didn't enjoy it. One of our book club members went and read the entirety of Akatar 1 through 5 in the space of two weeks so that they could then catch up on CC3. So that is a total of six books in June. Nikki you deserve a hat. I'm going to have to ask for an address. That to me is just phenomenal. Anyway the current book club read. This is not the cover of this book. If you ever look for this in a bookshop you won't find this. Sorry to be that annoying person but I just love this cover so much. So I am really glad that it won the book club vote. This is a Fairyloot exclusive. I just love their covers so much. Anyway this is our book club July read and I am really excited to get into it but I know that like we've got about this much of the book is going to be world building. And I did read, I literally read the first chapter last night and I was like. But I will, I'm obviously going to persevere in the name of book club and just I've never DNF'd a book so I will, I will finish. But really excited to get stuck into that because I know how amazing literally everyone says that it is. So the world building is obviously worth it and Crescent City had a lot of world building in the beginning you know anyway. So I've got a book that I literally finished last night, Flawless by Elsie Silver. I cannot wait to read. I've already downloaded, is it Heartless the second one in the series? I've already downloaded Heartless and now I'm trying to figure out how on earth I read these two both at the same time. Because that's a really big switch to juggle between. Going between Crescent City and Poison Dawson didn't really, really ever feel that jarring because I kind of didn't take, lift myself out of one world too much. But Cowboys versus Magic and Dragons. This I love. Is it a bit cheesy? Yes, but it's so great. Good amount of spicy. Yes, cheesy. Easy to read. It's just a happy little world. It's so nice. I also finished, I don't have my physical copy because I read it and raved about it so much that my mum has the copy and I literally was allowed to borrow it back for a few hours to film my TikTok review. And then she took it back. She literally came over as soon as I finished and took it back. So that's why I don't have the physical trophy. But I will soon because she will bring it back to me. She did a really good job of writing a YouTuber, an influencer. She either knows one or did some really, really good research. And that I love. And she didn't, she wrote her, like no one likes the main character, but like it wasn't in like a cringe or annoying way. It felt realistic to how I feel like people, to how some YouTubers can be, but also to how we're not all cut from the same cloth just because we do the same job. It's like saying like all finance pros are the same. I mean, maybe they are. It's like comparing David Attenborough to Jeremy Collins, you know, they both do like a similar job, but like it's not the same. Anyway, she does a really good job of writing an unhinged YouTuber, in my opinion. I really enjoyed the journey of this. Like I spent most of the book being like, how, no, how is this happening? How, what is going to be the, the reveal? How are we going to wrap? But I do think the reveal of what was happening could have been written better. I think there are similar books where like that type of reveal has definitely been written better, but I think it's a hard reveal to write. But I know that it is possible for it to have been done well because there are other books I've read where it's been done well. However, I think that the way it's written translates well in film, but it still could have been written better in the first place and then still translated to film. So I don't know. Liked the ending. I think it will come across well, really, really well visually on screen. And I have a new book that I have not started reading, but I just wanted to throw this in here because whilst we're doing book updates, we're doing books that I have finished, books that I have started, and a book that I literally purchased during my supermarket shop the other day. Murder on the Upper East Side by Gigi Waldorf. So we're just really heavily going like Gossip Girl vibes here. And it is fully about like, I think it's like students on... Yeah. Hannah Miller has begun her senior year at the Prescott Academy of New York alongside the rich and famous of the Upper East Side, or at least their children. That kind of vibe. Among the trust funds and penthouse parties, there's one rule for survival, staying out of the way of Queen B's Madison Dupont and Elle Harrington. For Hannah, being a scholarship student makes her feel invisible, but no one can escape the watchful eye of notorious gossip account The Upper Edge. The Academy's alumni have gathered for a glittering charity gala. Only Madison Dupont could host an event this grand. But what starts as a champagne-fuelled party soon descends into chaos when Madison is found dead moments after her speech. There's still a bit of blur, but we can end it there. That's the vibes. So yeah, I'm excited to binge that one. I really need a holiday so I can just sit on a sun lounger because that one would be done in a few hours. But yeah, that is my have read, am reading, to be read pile. I've actually had a lot of questions on how I get so much reading done. I basically, I have my Kindle constantly set on dark mode because that's the only time I ever really get to read. Like if you do see me in the day or like on a train and it's in dark mode, it's because I never bother switching it really. Yeah, I just read in bed every night. Like Delilah goes to bed and I read. Mariah goes to bed and I read. I haven't watched TV in a long, long time. There's so many things like Off Campus and what's the other thing, Every Summer After that everyone's said I need to watch. I watched like one ep of Million Dollar Nanny the other day on Delilah's nap and really regretted it. I can't read. That's how I'm getting everything done. I read after everyone's gone to bed, after I've finished working, blah, blah, blah, blah. Some nights I actually get less sleep now than when Delilah was like sleeping in bed with me and waking up all the time because I read too much. But that's how we're binging all the books. Anyway, I've got to go be mum now. Bye. So I'm actually baby free for a little bit longer. Ryan has taken Delilah out on her bike with his friend and I am doing her lunch. And I've just had a little delivery, which I believe, yes, is from one of my fave new home scent discoveries. This is the brand Kodo. I can't remember if I showed you in a vlog, but I definitely put it on my stories literally the moment it arrived. It is a, hang on, it is a room spray and it was a collab. Oh my God, my camera. I dropped my camera again for possibly the penultimate time the other day and it doesn't focus anymore. Rimi's banana bread cupcake thingies. If you live in London, you'll know what I'm talking about. Or if you spend time on TikTok, you'll know what I'm talking about. They're phenomenal. They did a collab with Kodo. So it's a banana bread, choco banana, Rimi's cake collab. And it smells incredible. It's basically like chocolate and banana. I spray this in my bedroom literally every day. And I was very excited when I saw the front of this box that had their brand name on it. And they have sent me a load of stuff. Sunday scoop. Pistachio, milk chocolate, caramel cream, Madagascan vanilla, coconut, sandalwood, bergamot. I like that they put like the time of day on it as well. So like late afternoon, early evening. Rich, nutty and irresistibly smooth. Creamy pistachio meets decadent milk chocolate. Like a Sunday sweet treat. Gorge, gorge. And these are like very clean scents. They don't put loads of like crap in them. So I feel like with having a baby in the house, it's just so nice. I can just be like... I actually didn't smell that before I sprayed it. Oh, it's so good. Oh, wow. That is sensational. They messaged me on Instagram when I put it on my stories. And I was like, guys, you need to make this like diffusers. Diffusers, candles, whole shebang. Like I need my whole house. Like you know how much I love the Zara's salted caramel candles and like diffusers. The diffusers like make my house smell like I bake all the time. And I don't. Phenomenal. That might be a new fave of mine. It's Sunday scoop. That's what the packaging looks like. It's really beautiful. This is Sweet Dreams. This is like an evening room spray. Chamomile, malagasy and vanilla, honey, sweet orange and cinnamon. Oh, my God. That's gorgeous. You can really smell the orange. Oh, wow. A vanilla-y orange. It's... Yeah, the cinnamon's coming through. You can smell it. But it smells a little bit like Christmas. Stunning. I'll probably spray this more in the autumn. What have we got here? Citrus bliss. Lemon, sweet orange, mandarin, malagasy and vanilla, caramelised sugar, black pepper. That's so stunning. It smells like... Kind of like lemon drizzle cake. If you did like a orange and lemon drizzle cake. Oh, my God. I love them. Sunday scoop's definitely my favourite. I'm going to have one of these upstairs in the wardrobe room for sure. I've almost got one for all of my favourite rooms in the house. Thank you very much, Dakota, because I am kind of thoroughly enjoying my house smelling. Stunning. Anyway, I need to get on and make Delilah an omelette now. This girl is eating... She eats more than I do. And it actually stresses me out so much because I have noticed that if she eats better through the day, she will sleep better. We've also changed her naps though, so I need to... I do need to do a little bit more trialing and testing. But I do believe she is sleeping very nicely, I think, throughout the day. And it's so easy when she's being like fussy or just like a bit grumpy to just be like, okay, well, you're done then. But then she will get hungry at like five in the morning. Just trying to make sure our girl is well fed. Like she had seconds and thirds after dinner last night, which is great. And I love that. But at the same time, it's very expensive. I don't feel like she's really like there yet in terms of certain amounts of like chunkiness. So I'm just going to throw it in the blender. I'm also struggling a little bit with just meals in general at the moment. In our local shop, all the freezers broke. All the fridges and the freezers, everything broke whilst it was really hot. And there's just no stock. That and with the football one. And I think people were like going nuts over barbecues. Like there's honestly nothing in the shops. And it's just like really stressing me out. We're having a slight pivot. Mommy can't cook. So the omelette didn't really work out. We do have a variation of scrambled egg that was made up from an omelette going wrong. We also have eggy bread. Tomato and red pepper eggy bread. Not to toot my own horn, I am a professional eggy bread maker. I'm really struggling feeding a child because obviously there's just some things that she can't. Like lots of things are a choking hazard. Trying to find meals that are like nutritionally balanced. And I'm not just feeding her carbs or just like tuna or just veggies. And then she's still starving. It is really hard. So where I've got to is eggy bread and a vegetable. And it just seems to be my go to. And I'm slightly concerned about that. I also feel like I was being judged a little bit for just like feeding her sandwiches all the time. Even though you can get loads and loads of veggies like mushed up in a sandwich. So yeah this is where I've got to. I try to be healthy and make her an omelette. I think weaning is one of the things I've struggled with the most to be honest. Like when it was just like we could feed her like baby pouches. Great. Maybe she's just having a growth spurt. She does go through some phases where she just doesn't care about food. Any recent mums out there I would love to know what you think. Because I know it was different 20 years ago and even 10 years ago. So I say recent mums for a reason. After all that someone is in fact not interested in eating her eggy bread. Cheers. Did I wash my hair on Delilah's nap? No. Did I work on Delilah's nap? No. Did I clean out my fridge? Yes. That is where my brain that doesn't focus properly took me. That is where my hyper fixation went today. Trying to bring my plants back to life. Waking up the garden. Waking up myself. I have just had the busiest weekend and quite frankly I think my body has had it. I've had several panic attacks over the course of the weekend. It was the most fun but it was also so rough at the same time. It was also so hot over the weekend and all of my brand new plants are dead. Like they are not thriving. The ones from years before, fine. This year's hydrangea is not thriving. It's giving dry. Very dry. By the way we got new garden furniture. It's actually all from Asda. George at Asda. Paid for it with my own pennies and I'm really happy with it. This year in the veg patch which is very overgrown. The veg patch decided to grow its own tomatoes and we decided to just let it. But there were also, we wanted carrots. There are some carrots in here. And we also have two lots of different types of potato. But mostly we have tomatoes. And then we also have sunflowers which are really fun. And very cute. I love a little sunflower. And they're actually really giving like multiple sunflowers on one stem. That is my garden all set up for the day. We have a little mat at the back as well for Delilah to play on when it's obviously shady. But yeah, I love it. It's so cute. I've just been for a walk and now I'm going to do a little bit of makeup. I did promise myself I wasn't going to put makeup on and just have like a chill day. But then I remember there's something I want to film. So my recharge day has already kind of stopped before it's started. Shall we just title this vlog, watch Suzy do everything that she really shouldn't be doing. It's fine. I've been for a walk. I'm just going to do the few bits that I need slash want to do today. And then I will be mum in the afternoon. This looks crazy but it's going to work itself out. This is the Iborian CC cream. I really like this. You can literally see it like warming to my skin tone. Live on camera it's honestly incredible. And the coverage is so good. But it feels so light and it's so hydrating. Which is exactly what my skin needs right now. I also have had to pop a little paracetamol. I've got the worst ovulation pains. And normally like on a good month, I don't feel them. But if I am like mentally or physically strained, I feel them. Like after I gave birth to Delilah, it was like crippling, couldn't get out of bed pain. Which was just insane. And they're pretty bad today. But anyway, just know that if I'm not quite right for the rest of this vlog, I'm really going through it. And I understand that there are a lot of people that are actually truly going through it. But yes, I am a sensitive soul. And that's okay. And no one is more frustrated by it than I. Like it rages me that I just can't seem to function the way a normal human would. And just like go and enjoy life without like having a panic attack. And having to try and disguise that. Which is so hard. One of the things that has developed is like this, I can't swallow. And it feels like I can't, like I'm not, like if I can't, if you can't swallow. You also feel like you can't breathe. And at the same time, the room will kind of like spin. And you just kind of have to like try and hold it together. But at one point I literally like had to grab the table to like steady myself. And I was just like, this is insane. Then I just feel so bad because I haven't uploaded a YouTube video in like a hundred years. And like the last thing I really need to be doing is pausing. I need to actually be like doing my job. Wow, the coverage on that CC cream is stunning. Anyway, I'm just, I don't want this to really be a moan. Because it's literally the most unrelatable moan. Just in case anyone was wondering why I'm spiralling. That is why. Because I am really spiralling. Like it is kind of out of control. Like I think the pressure of also having a baby is really, really, really getting to me. Like I worry about everything. Like am I going to be able to pay my bills in 10 years time? Like I'm worrying now about whether I'm going to be able to pay my bills in 10 years time. But like last night I was worrying about it so much I thought I was going to be sick. Anyway, on a happier note, I had the best time at Wimbledon apart from said issue. I forgot to check in advance like what, like I don't normally check. Because like you don't always know the timings when you go with a brand. And like what match you're going to definitely be seeing. But we got there and seeing Djokovic play. I was literally like, I sat down and I was like, I am so gassed for this. Like I have got more into tennis. Like Ryan's got me more into tennis over the last few years. I would say he's very good at playing. I don't know. He's definitely much, much better than me. So it's definitely got me more into it. And I honestly, I was like sat down. And like when I used to go to Wimbledon when I was younger, I would kind of like sit, watch a bit. Just kind of like half watch because I didn't really know what I was watching. I've got way more into tennis. And I like, if I didn't have to make content and didn't have to like, if I could just have loads of background noise all the time at the moment in July, I would probably just like be binging tennis in the background. Yeah. I was just like sat and I was just like, I, I really don't want to leave. And it was like boiling, boiling sunshine. And it was really not, I was like getting quite anxious. It felt like heat stroke, sunshine. I also hadn't eaten. I've missed lunch. My car got delayed. I was honestly so hungry. But it was so good. And I was just like, no, I really can't get up and leave my seat right now. Like I'm not even getting up to pee. This lip combo is the best. They need to start making this lipstick again. We need a restock. Valentino, please. Perfect white based pinky nude. So yeah. Had the best weekend. Like watching Lewis Hamilton on the track. Amazing. Djokovic at Wimbledon. Amazing. Like just what a weekend. Like so great. Am I mentally suffering? Yes. Do I consider it worth it? Also yes. My skin is really running low on this mascara. I've actually been using a lash serum recently. And I feel like it's making being on the dregs of my mascara actually look really good still. Because I have so much length to my lashes. It just gives the ends of them a bit of colour. So you can really see like how long they're getting. I'm going to keep using it and see. I will report back. But so far so good. Look at those wispy little lashes. Not even little. Anyway, I feel like I've just yapped. And a lot of this video is just going to be me in my closet. But honestly, if you guys are okay with that, that's the only way you're going to get more regular videos out of me. Because this being my problem, everyone misses the vlogs and I miss vlogging. But I really, like I don't really buy a crazy amount of stuff anymore. So like sit down hauls are like a thing of the past. It's rare that I go places. When I do, I'm also doing content for other platforms or for a brand. And like it's just so hard to juggle. So like I prefer vlogging from my home. But then when I'm home, I'm not really doing anything. Working out and reading books is like most of my spare time. And I do obviously try to vlog that as much as I can. But I'm very aware that me going to the gym is probably not super interesting. All this to say, what do you want to see when I am at home? Because I feel like it's easier for me to vlog at home than it is for me to vlog like out and about. What parts of my life that you already see, do or like maybe you don't see. But like what parts of my life that you already know exist, do you want to see more of? You guys really let me know that you enjoyed the content. So that was a part of my life that was so easy to talk about more and to share more. Because it's something that I like genuinely already spend so much of my time doing. And actually it makes it so much nicer. Because I can then, it's not like a part of my life that is like so separate. I don't know. Let me, let me know. Anyway, I've been vlogging for 12 minutes. I'm so sorry. Anyway, this is what I'm wearing today. I love this style of shorts. They're so nice and breezy. I'm actually so anxious about this weekend. It's going to be 30 again and my bedroom window is broken so it doesn't open. I'm scared. I'm tempted to break the window in all honesty. I don't need it to be fixed until the winter. Anyway, these I think are from ASOS and then I've got a Skims black vest top on. With a very nice bra underneath to give a little bit of shape and proportion. Which is so nice because otherwise I feel like this looks a little bit more pear shaped. And then I'm not wearing shoes because my feet quite honestly are absolutely ruined after the weekend. So it was so hot, it was so swollen, so much walking. So I'm just going to be barefoot for as long as physically possible. I'm actually thinking this could be a really cute outfit for London tomorrow. I may have to change. It's very city girl. So maybe we save this. That means I need to find something else to wear. Ignore the mess in the background. I'm a slob. I know. Whatever. I thought I would just show you something I picked up. I actually, I bought a new bag and I don't know if I'm going to keep it. I really want to keep it. So we might have to do a big bag sale soon. I already have a few which you guys voted on stories and you want on Vestiaire. Rather than just like buying on Instagram via me. But I'll probably put a couple more on to be fair. Because I feel like I've just been on a little bag buying spree recently. But this, it's beaded. So like this is very bright light right now. So it's going to look really like sheeny. It's insane. I just feel like this is like great nighttime, daytime, summer, autumn, winter. Like it's so cool. It's got a little, little mini shoulder strap, which is what I'm all about. And then it does have a mini shoulder strap in leather. And then a long shoulder strap like for the price point. I just feel like that's amazing that you get three, three straps. Dior would never be out there doing that. They'd be charging you per strap. And then it's also just like beaded. Like I didn't realize when I bought it, I didn't look at the zoomed pic. I just saw that it was kind of sheeny. And I was like assuming that it would be like a hairy or a suede material. I don't know, but that is even better. Like so cool. Anyway, I picked that up. But the reason I went on the Coach website was because I really wanted, I've wanted one of these since they launched. And I just keep refreshing, seeing if they've got any new book charms in stock. This is Maya Angelou's I Know Where the Caged Bird Sings. And it is just, honestly, it's so incredible. Like it's an actual, I'm going to open it now because I didn't want to earlier because I was scared of getting it like fingerprinty. But it's an actual like tiny copy of the book. How incredible. This is like one of those Pokemon things where it's like a gotta catch them all thing that I would just love every single one of them. But this is just so beautiful. I think they also do sense and sensibility, which I would very much like if anyone has been gifted one that they don't want, if anyone has a spare one. Any of the above reasons, I don't care what your reasoning is for having it and getting rid of it, I will, I will buy it off you. But this cover on this bag, love. I love it, I think it's so cool. I love that Coach did this. I think it's so iconic. I just had to have it. So I'm definitely keeping that. But let me know what you think on the bag. It fits a Kindle, so I am sold. I've really been sleeping on a Coach tabby. I think these are the tabby. Let me know thoughts. The more I look at her, the more I'm sold. I just think she's so, so iconic. I need to get my makeup off now. We are having an early night. I've got London first thing in the morning. I can't lie, you guys. I'm not feeling particularly well at the moment. So I just need an early night. I need to cuddle up with my book with When the Moon Hatched and just get a lot of sleep. Okay. Good evening, everybody. Ryan's giving Delilah a bath. So if you hear any rogue background noises, that's what that is. I've been sent something. I've been dying to unbox. I finally have a spare five minutes. I've been doing a lot of Delilah care lately. There's been a lot of birthdays, stag do's. My anxiety has been raging. So she has also been adorable, and I've been spending lots of time with her. So all of that has kind of amalgamated, and it's actually been like two weeks since I last saw you. This is quite a jump into the future. I'm literally just about to get ready for bed. And you know my routine that I love to do of an evening where I have like my really, really low-maintenance routine where I put the LED mask on my face, and then I do my hands, and then I read my Kindle and stick the Kindle to the... Have I showed you that? I'm sure I've showed you that. We're about to level up. And this is like potentially very unnecessary because I'm well aware that we've got the full head of thick hair. But I did want to trial this so that I could let you guys know whether it's worth the money, because I 100% think the LED for face and hands is worth the money, especially if you're like me, you get your nails done all the time. I really do think the hand one is great. And I do think my hands do look like just very... Not youthful, because I'm obviously not a 14-year-old, but they're looking good. I feel like there has been an improvement in like the youthful looking-ness of them. So this is the Current Body LED Hair Helmet thing. LED hair regrowth. Yay! That's a cool box. That's really satisfying. Oh my God, I'm going to look insane! Ryan's going to think I've lost it. And maybe I have. Oh my God, it's talking to me in the headphones. What the hell? I think you can connect it to your phone and play music. For best results, use daily for a minimum of 16 weeks. Use the device on clean, dry scalp. Do not use more than 10 minutes a day. As if this is like the stand for it. Where are we putting that? I think I'm going to take my makeup off and do the full face, hand, helmet shebang. Hopefully ready for when Ryan comes in and he's going to be like, what on earth? Also, two little updates actually. One, I have my hair done and it's a bit lighter now, which I think is very cute. Main update though, I finished When the Moon Hatched. This is how long it's been since I last seen you. You know it's been two weeks for real because I've managed to go through a whole book. Wait, I think it's been longer than two weeks because I've actually read two books. I've read a lot of books, yeah. So I read book one of the Moonfall series and then I also read book two, called Ballad of the Falling Dragon. These I actually found out were meant to be one. You can see how they did not end up being one because that is a chunky book. And it all kind of makes sense now because they're, the world building in this actually, by the way, not that bad at all. Everyone really over it, but I think having come from reading Crescent City to this, like the world building feels very, very normal. Also, I'm quite a fantasy girl, so I really didn't feel like it was that much to wrap my head around. I feel like a lot of people read this that aren't actually that into fantasy, which blows my mind. Just people not being into fantasy also blows my mind, but like this is a first read when you're not into fantasy, wild. But yeah, the world building, absolutely fine. And actually about this much of the book is like avoidancy, our FMC avoiding her problems, and that was the thing that irked me most. However, when you get to the end of this, but also when you read this, the avoidancy makes so much sense. And there's also so many, I got to the end of this book and I was like, wait, I think there are some things that are happening that are just like mad to me. I don't want to say here, I've done TikToks on it if you want to go and see my predictions slash potential spoilers. But yeah, like towards the end I was like, wait, this is getting so good. And then it just like abruptly ends and you're like, what the hell? And it makes sense when it abruptly ends because actually if you were reading this as one, it would just kind of like continue. And it really does just like pick up exactly where you left off. This is up there in my like top three fantasy reads. I loved it. I loved it so much, but it also made me so sad. I feel like if other moms have read this, you'll understand like, I would have thought this was so sad before having a baby, but having an actual baby girl. Like last night, Brian saw me actually sobbing at this, like the last second to last chapter. And he looked at me like, why are you doing this to yourself? And he has a very good point because it's a lot, I can't lie. And I would warn you on how much of a lot this is emotionally because I feel like if you've read Crescent City and Akatar, Sarah J Maas is really good at balancing her with humour. And like you, she gives relief where you need there to be relief. I don't feel like this ever really gives me any form of, it has its occasional funnies. It's very, very rare spice, but ultimately this is heavy. Coming off the back of like the whole of the Sarah J Maas world and then like the Powerless series and Hunger Games, this is definitely like the most heavy to me, but also so beautiful. Like I love the world that she has created and the writing is so beautiful. It's just sometimes I feel like I could do with a bit more lightness, but other than that, it's just incredible. If it had a bit more lightness where I needed there to be lightness, I think I would put it as one of the best books I've ever read. Maybe as like a duo together because you have to have both together, I guess, to feel the feels. And I did read them literally back to back. It was amazing. I would say my, whenever someone starts Akatar, I'm always like, you have to, don't judge it by a court of thorns and roses. You have to do a court of mist and fury as well. You have to commit to both of them before you decide you don't like it. Because if you get to a court of mist and fury and you end it and you didn't like it, then don't bother continuing. But like, you can't get to a court of thorns and roses ending and decide it's not for you because it's not. It's like a prequel to the whole story. This is the exact same. Like, I think you need to commit. I think you need to commit to both of these before you decide you don't like it. Because I very nearly got to the end of this and I was like, I just don't know if I can continue. And then it got to the very end and I was like, oh, that was good. Okay. Gonna commit to the next one. But if she's annoying in this book, that's it. I'm done. She was so much less annoying in this book. 10 out of 10 for character development. Absolutely loved it. But yeah, commit to both before you judge it harshly. Ignore the eye situation. I'm actually missing one of these. Do they fit together? Is my question. Wait, why don't they fit? Yeah. There we go. Wah! Oh my God. Do you ever just think you've gone too far? Because I do. Even the dog's running away from me. Damn. I forgot to... I'm going to be very bored for 10 minutes. I really hope Brian comes in whilst I'm wearing this. You scared me. Do you need any more red lights? I've thought about it. Hair growth. We better play music as well. It actually does. You can connect your phone to it. I believe it does anyway. That's what the instructions kind of gave me the Bible. Maybe jump. That was fun. Anyway, I really hope you enjoyed that end to today's vlog. I don't think I have anything else to say. And I'm going to leave it on that because that was the highlight of my day. Anyway, that is going to be it from me. It's so good to be back.