Orlando Bloom, Jason Randal | Full Episode

Thank you very much, thank you very much, and back at you. My voice is a little weird today, it's, and you'll notice, like, I'm gonna be fine. And then who knows, maybe later when I'm talking to Orlando Bloom or something, I'm fine. I have, how my voice works, I could be totally fine, and then it clears up later, and then maybe at the end of the show, this comes back again. I don't know how it's gonna work. Oh, man, but I appreciate it, I love, you know, I don't care if I'm sick. I don't care if I've, I've, I've torn a muscle, broken a bone, if I have a sore throat. I love coming to work, I love being here, it makes me happy, that is what I want to talk about, because I think people focus too much on what's wrong with the world, and what's bad and what's, and it's just, there are a lot of bad things, but let's focus on the things that we like. Like, I want to talk about things I love right now, and, and I don't have to talk about puppies and kittens, because that's a given, you know, those are obvious. Why do I have to go on and on about puppies and kittens, that they're the cutest things in the world? When the puppies lay down with their legs like that, and you, oh, cute and happy, so I don't have to talk about them, or, or little baby birds, and, and little tiny, tiny little fuzzy hair, and little, oh, cute and downy. Anything baby really is cute, you just, I mean, not anything, I mean, like a baby alligator is not cute. Oh, kind of, with its little underbite and everything, little tiny, hello little alligator, and then they're big, and they're not as cute, but, and you know what else I, I love, getting away from animals, I love, I, at night, when I make my coffee, I set it for the automatic timer thing, so it's ready for me in the morning, like a little gift, because sometimes I wake up, and I don't want to get out of bed, I'm tired, and then I'll go, puppies, lie out of bed, and slide with my socks like Tom Cruise in Risky Business, because it, oh, it's a wonderful feeling, it's just, they're waiting, you don't have to wait and push the button, and listen to it dribble, and you know, tick, tick, tick, you know, you know what else makes me happy, is finding a matching lid to a Tupperware container right, right away, this is the greatest thing, it's like, you look at it, and you're like, I think that's the one, and sure enough, it fits right on there, it's just incredibly satisfying, you feel like you've done something right with your life, and it's going to be a good day, I like when I also, when I go over to a friend's house that I haven't been for a while, let's say it's been about a month and a half, or two months or so, and then I walk in, and they are holding up a coat, and they go, did you leave this here, and I'm like, oh my God, my favorite coat, you have my coat, and it's like a reunion with your favorite special clothes, and sometimes I do that, if it's not my coat, if it's cute, but anyway, what I don't like is when I go to the public restroom, and I'm in there, and too late, I realize there's no toilet paper, I hate that, but what I love is all of a sudden, you realize the spare roll is right there waiting for you, it's like finding a cave full of treasure, is what it's like, which also makes me happy, when you're in a cave, and there's treasure, I also really love coming here every single day, and saying, Johnny, make me dance, I also like little babies, I can't believe you're not due till next month, did you say next month, end of next month, wow, is this your first, no, no, okay, is it a boy or a girl, do you know, what's his name, Mose, this show today is from Mose, also dancing with you makes me happy, looking at you dancing makes me happy, this guy really made me happy, that makes me happy, and I'll tell you, oh, he makes me happy like crazy, Orlando Bloom, and he's here, and opens tomorrow, the movie opens tomorrow, I predict, I'm gonna go out on a limb, and say this is gonna be a huge, huge opening, I think it's gonna, I think it's gonna do well, also, oh, she's fantastic, if you haven't seen her before, you're in for a treat, Joss Stone is here, her album is called Introducing Joss Stone, it's her third album, remember, I bought her first album, and it's called, I'll Tell You Who I Am Later, and I liked her, I would've bought the second one anyway, but I'm like, who is it, and I bought the second album, and it was called, I'm Still Not Ready to Tell You, finally, she's, and we're gonna give it to you today, everybody, do you love magic, I love magic, this guy, he's been on the show before, and he's so, so good, he's gonna blow your mind is what he's gonna do, he's a sleight of hand magician, his name is Jason Randall, and he's gonna be here, and I love magic, and I've never been good at it, but I've just been working on a little magic trick, and I'm gonna try to do it right now, this is a ping pong ball, ordinary ping pong ball, you can see, and I'm gonna try to make it disappear, watch this, is making it reappear, watch this, I can't do it, but I can give everybody Netflix, which is a 12-month complimentary subscription, it's fun, cause you get movies in the mail, it's fun, you know what I like to get in the mail too, I like to get your letters, and I'm gonna read something right now in our segment called, Randall, I'm gonna rest, this is from Laura Constable, from Rochester, New York, I'm 15 years old, high school student, every day when I get home, I watch your show, I think you're so funny, and help people with their problems a lot, so I was hoping you could help me, when I shut my locker at school, it doesn't always lock, the other day when I came back, it was obvious someone had opened it, they looked through my backpack, they took my digital camera, my $100 calculator, my light-up pen, my Snapple for lunch, I can't believe somebody would do something so cruel, maybe if you scold them on national television, they'll have a change of heart, and they'll give me my things back, Laura, I'm sorry that happened to you, and it's a hard lesson to learn that there are some bad people out there, there are, I'm not gonna scold them, because I believe, just like Justin Timberlake, what goes around, comes around, and so the real lesson is to just, you wanna treat people the way you wanna be treated, that's the way we should all treat one another, you seem like a nice person, and I think nice things come to people, so I wanna do something nice for you, what I did is I got you a new digital camera that I'm gonna give you, and I'm gonna take a picture of myself, alright, and then I got you a light-up pen, so that you have your light-up pen back, I got you a Snapple for lunch, actually, I'm just a little thirsty, I'm gonna have a tiny, I couldn't find, I don't know, a $100 calculator, I don't know what you had, so I was just gonna give you $100, so I'm gonna, um, Brian, can I borrow $100, it goes around, comes around, you'll get it back, you're good for it, right, yeah, I'm good for it, I'll pay you back, thanks Brian, alright, so, there are good people out there, and I'm sorry that happened to you, but there were a lot of good people, there's more good people than bad people, and then here's another letter I got from another lovely person, Mandy Lee in Stevens Point, Wisconsin, I'm writing to ask you to speak at my high school graduation ceremony in May, I watch your show and I think you are one of the best role models for how everyone should live their life, you're independent, unique, funny, and you live your life your way, these are traits every graduate needs to go on and do great things, wow, that's sweet, um, I can't be there Mandy, I work all through May, so, um, I don't want to disappoint you, so I have a solution. Please be seated. I am honored to be asked to address Mandy Lee's high school class of 2007, as you go forth to fulfill your dreams, remember, this isn't a dream, it's called the real world, and it's full of puppies and kittens and cheese pizza, and there's plenty for everyone, here's my advice, don't take anyone's advice, live your life your way, the way you want to live it, even if that means never moving out of your parents' house, in closing, remember the words of Rascal Flatts, life is a highway, I want to ride it all night long, also don't go away, when we come back, I'm going up in the audience to play Humdinger. Welcome back, it's time to play one of my favorite games from Cranium, it's called Humdinger, here's what's going to happen, a contestant is going to hum the song that they hear in these headphones, I'm going to guess what the song is, if they guess right, if I guess right, I win a prize, uh, no, that's not right, they win a prize, alright, let's meet our first contestant, you were the first one, see that red mark right there, it's for you, thank God you wore red, what is your name? Megan Cokie. Megan, and where do you live Megan, what do you do? I go to Florida State University in Tallahassee, Florida. Look at me when you're talking to me, you're gorgeous, thank you, you're pretty too, alright, so do you know a lot of music? You do? Yes I do. Alright good, well we're going to put these on you, she made that kind of, turning things around what I'm saying, yes I am good at music, um, alright, and I'm going to turn around, and the audience is going to see the song that you're going to hear in those, and tell me when I can turn back around, everybody sees the song, alright, can I turn around? Okay, alright, start humming, it's Gwen Stefani, it's Gwen Stefani, alright, that wasn't really humming, I thought someone actually got like a zipper caught on your skin, the first part of it was like you were in pain, alright, I'm going to turn around again, and y'all are going to look at the next song that I have to guess, you see it, alright, can I I couldn't even move on, can you hear me, I said we're done, um, so, but you're the only contestant, that's not fair, I don't know how that, we ran out of time, um, but you know what you're getting is an 80 gigabyte video iPod, co-stars of the new movie Pirates of the Caribbean at World's End, which opens in theaters this Friday, please welcome back the talented and charming Orlando Blue, good to have you back, thanks for having me back, now clearly women are crazy about you, Cameron Diaz was here last week and she was talking about how Victoria's Secret voted her sexiest legs, and she said when I was a kid, had I known that, that would have saved me so much heartache because she was a kid, she had scrawny legs, when you were younger, were you this popular with girls, or did you have a totally different childhood, I was kind of chubby, quite chubby as a kid, you were, really, yeah, I broke my leg when I was about 9 skiing and so I had a cast from about 9 to 10, it was like for some reason it was a year in cast and it was at a time where I was, I used to be really sporty and stuff, so I just started eating chocolate and I just got a bit tubby and I got so tubby that my mom I remember saying, like thinking, like she took me to a doctor and said you just can't stop eating chocolate and he tried to hypnotize me and stuff to stop me eating chocolate, my mom kind of got into that hippy dippy stuff, and then once the cast came off, or the cast as you call it, the cast came off, once the cast came off, then you lost the weight again and you were popular with girls, yeah I started playing sport again, I don't know if I was, yeah I suppose, I don't know, I grew up with my mom and my sister so I was always comfortable with girls, so I felt like, I just was quite friendly with girls. And were you good in, why, what's that face? I don't know. I don't know. Were you popular, like were you good in school, did you have good grades, did you study hard? Yeah I worked really hard at school, I mean I was, I'm mildly dyslexic, not badly but enough that it was a good excuse to pretend that like I couldn't do work at school and just be looking out the window, but actually, no I worked really hard to get all my exams, I took extra classes for stuff, because I had a really great teacher who explained to me that it didn't make me stupid, you know, and I didn't ever feel stupid, it wasn't like, dyslexia isn't something that you have to kind of be afraid of, you know, and once I was really explained that, because I was smart, you know, and actually my IQ was really high when I got tested, because they test your IQ and then they test you for different things, and so I had extra classes for like, to help me with it, and I did really well at school It frustrates you though, I think a lot of kids have ADD or dyslexia, and it does make you feel like you're not smart, it's got nothing to do with intelligence, it's really tough And thankfully I found acting, and I was always really creative at school, and I was encouraged to embrace that side of it, I think creativity is massively important for kids, you know, it's like we send our kids to, you know, I mean I don't have them yet, but like I'm gonna make sure that they have access to, you know, any kind of art classes, whatever it is, because it's, you know, you can go so far with that It's so necessary, and they're trying to cut all that in school right now, they're trying to cut costs and so many, it's crazy, it's kids, and like you said, you're kids, you don't have kids right now, but soon you'll plan on having kids, how soon? What, you want some? Sure! Can you speak to that? I kind of do, but I don't want to have one, but yeah, but if you want to have some and give it to me, I'll take some of yours, they'll be pretty, they'll be real pretty kids Beautiful blue eyes, blonde, maybe a bit of brunette Oh, you're saying you want my eggs, no, you can't, you're proposing to me I'm joking, so I'd say I would be honoured, you are, huh, did you, you just found this out, we told you backstage, he's the most googled man, you are the most googled man, you'd have like, if you googled yourself right now, which It's my mom, she's constantly doing it You'd have like, 3 million hits, like, just right now, just, what do you think that is? I don't even really understand googling, so I don't know, I'm still completely, completely Do you have a computer? You know, I bought one, but I haven't really used it, and it's pathetic, you know, it's pathetic, it's sad I refuse to join the, I do too, I think it's horrible, I like writing and I like calling people Me too, what happened to writing letters? I mean, that's beautiful, it's kind of, there's something beautiful in getting, don't you think, receiving a letter? Yeah And it's, there's something beautiful about actually it coming out of a pen of your hand Spending the time and doing it Instead of touching things Yeah, I agree I was down in Antarctica recently, and I was at the last, I sent a bunch of postcards from the last post office in the, at the bottom of the world, basically, and it's called Fort Lott Roy, it's, and there's a post box there, I mean, they're still waiting to receive the postcards, but, you know Ah, right That was 6 months ago So tell me about that, Antarctica, because you were in, is that for, environmental Hang on, are we going to have kids? Is that, what did we get to with that? I can't remember We decided that we may have kids, we're not sure yet Yeah We'll talk about it later, after the show I think that's where we left it Sorry, yeah But, but if you want to have my children, you can Do you think I could? Is that how it works? I don't know how it works We could look that up on the computer, except neither of us would be able to do that We don't understand, you, with the computer stuff, and with my sexuality, I don't know how it works But we'll figure it out, and you will have my children Thanks Yeah, I know, I can imagine Alright, alright, we have to take a break, and we'll figure this out, we'll be right back It's a moody world, Tanya Don't have her kids, have mine I know, exactly Have my kids, not hers Alright, so I'm still trying to figure out how I'm actually going to have kids I don't know yet, but someone is going to figure it out, of course Right, I know It's the 21st century, but you're crying out loud So, what is the deal with, there's like a battle scene that took four months? Yeah, I mean To shoot? We were shooting, actually, down in Palmdale for about four months, in a giant warehouse, which was one big rain machine, actually, it was kind of hard, a lot of chafing, wet costumes are very uncomfortable I bet, I bet, it's a lot of work for a movie like that It is, actually, yeah The whole lot of work Alright, so, let's talk about, because you said you went to Antarctica, and I'm just, I can imagine how gorgeous and also educational that is Yeah, it was massively So, look at you with penguins Oh, look at that, yeah Now, how cold was it? It was very cold, about minus 20 Minus 20? Yeah Wow Yeah, and that was, that was a bunch of, there was, I went with, on a science exposition boat, but it turns out that it was basically a vacation boat for a bunch of guys for Good Reach Tires Uh-huh So, it was, it was interesting, I had a great time, because I ended up climbing a mountain and snowboarding down it, I ended up, like, scuba diving in Antarctica, which is kind of weird, in a dry suit, but it's freezing, you know, I mean, obviously, like, I just came out, my hands were frozen, it was just awful, but, hello? But that was But, but it was, it was an amazing experience, and, and, you know, the thing about, the thing about seeing and being in Antarctica is that it's, it's these giant icebergs, which are three times bigger below the water than they are above, and they just feel like dinosaurs, you know, it's really tragic, because it feels so fragile, it just feels like, I'm seeing it now, and next year, you know it's going to be very different Yeah, it's Ten years from now Amazing rate, I mean, every year, it just goes down more and more and more Yeah, yeah, and, and, but the thing about the environment that frustrates me is that it always seems like doom and gloom, you know, it's like, you can be somebody who drives an SUV, but you can still use energy efficient light bulbs, or make a difference in other areas, you know what I mean, it's like, you don't, it doesn't have to be all or nothing, because it's that thing of like, oh, I, I'm not environmentally friendly, because I drive an SUV, so therefore, because that makes me feel safe, but, so therefore, I'm just going to keep living how I am, and put my head in a box and forget about it Right Actually, no, just, okay, drive your SUV, maybe make a donation to like a wind farm or something, or, you know, or offset it by doing that, or, or use energy efficient light bulbs, or, you know Plant trees Plant trees, just, you know, it's like, it doesn't have to be all or nothing, and that's the thing that I keep coming back to, because, you know It's hard to live all the way on the other side, but it really is, but I, I agree, little things that we do are going to make a huge difference Well, eventually, it will change, because it's going to have to, so Yeah, like you said, water is going to be a huge expense It's going to be more expensive than oil, you know, I mean, it's going to be massive Crazy to think that, crazy, because these water bottles that we're just throwing away and drinking and acting like there's nothing wrong, one day we're going to look back on that, it's crazy Use a filter, yeah All right, well, I adore you, and we'll figure out how it's going to happen Yeah Pirates of the Caribbean at World's End opens in theater, in a theater this Friday, we'll be right back, don't go away Our next guest is back, he's going to freak, you're freaking freaks, I'll tell you that, please welcome magician and mentalist, Jason Randall Okay, what, show me, I, I, I want to talk to you, but I just, I don't want to run out of time, because your stuff is so good, so what's the first one? Thanks, Ellen, I just got back from Hong Kong, where, you know, they practice feng shui, where they believe in yin and yang, and the five elements, which, by the way, are metal, fire, wood, and water, and earth is the last one Uh huh Take a little bit of that earth Okay, and what do you want me to do with it? Feel my hands and make sure they're completely dry, right? Put the earth into my hand Uh huh Not all of it, but even more, good, want a little bit more, that's good, now place the cap back on Uh huh Ellen, do you know why none of the earth fell out of my hand onto your table? I'm not sure It's because I have no earth in my hand Now, point to either one of my hands Put your hand out, and watch And there you go That's amazing! Thank you, just dump it down there and do this No, that's alright The next, the next feat is going to actually involve the wood, and I'll show you how this works I'm going to have you, I'm going to take the deck of cards, which is regular, and I'm going to go like this until you say stop Instead of stopping here, because I can peek at that card, we'll take the next one, ready? Okay Here we go Stop Now you stop me after the four You stop me after the four, take the next one, show it to yourself so you know what it is and your audience Take your time Close your eyes Don't look down Okay You got it? Yep Now, place it back inside anywhere you like You got it Okay, now I'm going to try to find the card, I'm going to give myself four chances to find the card You ready? Yes First chance will be the Queen of Clubs, was that right? No Let me just ask one more time, the Queen of Clubs, not yours? No You're sure? How about the bottom card, the Queen of Hearts, was that maybe it? No How about, Ellen, the King of Spades, was that it? You know that's not it One last guess, the Six of Diamonds, no? What are you doing? Take the block of wood, and with your left hand for ESP, and place it like a chess piece on top of one of the cards Okay Do you want to move it? Nope I'll take the others away, what was your card, Ellen? Four of Hearts Look underneath the block of wood Oh, come on, Jason Wow I need to borrow your ring for this Here's my ring How long have you had this ring, Ellen? For about two and a half years I'm going to wear it here on my thumb, and what I'm going to do is I'm going to actually move it to the keys, are you ready? Mm-hmm But not these keys, that would be way too easy, your ring is gone In my back pocket, I have a key case, your ring is hanging among my keys on one of the hooks This is her ring, I can't get it off, I'll have to FedEx it to you Wow There you go That's amazing If you want to see more of Jason, log on to JasonRandall.com, and you're going to come back at the end of the show to do one more trick, okay? I am, with fire Oh, with fire Mm-hmm Josh Stone's going to sing for us when we come back, don't go away That was a sneak peek at the second In the Motherhood webisode starring my friend Leah Remini In the Motherhood is brought to you by Sprint and Suave, and you can catch the whole webisode online and exclusively on Sprint phones, don't forget to log on to InTheMotherhood.com to submit your story All right, one more trick from Jason Ellen, pull one of these cards out, even I can see it this time Okay Queen of Clubs, representing a strong woman, take this sharpie and write your name across the face of the card, please Place it inside, and now we're going to go like this, and like this, and you are going to do the rest I want you to take this sword, because remember I said that it had to do with metal and wood, and both of that is, and fire, and take the sword out of the sheet there, and we're going to take the cards, I'm going to place them wrapped in this paper, and put a piece of tape across it You, take the sword, and stab it anywhere you like in the back, now the sword is only sharp on the point, so go ahead and push it anywhere you want, very slowly by the way, so we're careful It's too close to your hand I understand, but I'm only a guest, now push, just keep pushing, just good, more pressure, perfect, perfect, and more, so it comes all the way out Now, Ellen, I said it was going to involve fire, would you please take these matches, and light a match Remember, Ellen signed one card, it went into the middle, she stabbed anywhere she wanted in the back Alright You ready? Mhmm One, two, I got it Mhmm Only one card left on the knife, your queen, your signature Impressive Thank you Thank you Jason, my guest Orlando Bloom-Gaston, amazing magician Jason Randall, I'll see you tomorrow everybody, bye bye