My Divorce Is Costing Me a Fortune ($200k and Counting)

Zander shops all the top term insurance companies to save you money. Get started at zander.com. Well, I'm going through a now three-year divorce and I'm having a hard time financing the rest of the divorce. We've used up quite a bit of assets during that time. Why is it dragged out for three years? Soon to be. She had a stakeholder in her company that she worked for. They have private shares. It's a private company. We had to do a long discovery process because they were unwilling to give the information. I had to hire a forensic accountant to do a lot of digging. It just cost me probably $200,000 now over those three years. Did you have that money? I did. Now I'm out. I've been signing up for credit cards to pay for the attorneys and the accountant. How much credit card debt are you in? About $30,000 now and counting because we're still litigating. Where's the end in sight here? We were supposed to be done in February, but the stock price changes every March. Let's play this out. What if this is another two years and now you're $200,000 in debt? Was it worth this? Yeah, because every year, and this is what I tried to talk to my ex-wife about, was every year the stock price goes up and we own about 300,000 shares in the company, which if it fluctuates a dollar, that's close to another half million a year, just if it's a dollar a share increase. We're looking at 1.7 million difference from 2025 to 2026. But at this point, we're gambling because if you lose this thing and you're $200,000 in debt, now you're screwed. Yeah, I'm kind of getting richer and poorer at the same time, so it's a weird prediction. Can you move this to mediation? There are basics every family needs. Food, shelter, transportation, and term life insurance. Term life is simple. If you pass away, it pays money to your family so they can keep paying the bills. Protecting the people you love is part of winning with money, and when you're ready to do that, go with who I trust, Zander Insurance. Zander shops top companies to find the right coverage at the best price, and they've earned my recommendation for nearly 30 years. Go to zander.com today. Can you move this to mediation? We've mediated three times now. And so I'm confused what the holdup is. What else do you have to have for it to be final? For her to, I guess, give up and face reality. We've tried to mediate, and we're so far off on the numbers that basically needs to go to trial, and the trial date just keeps on getting pushed off the docket and moved forward because of non-cooperation on their side. We wanted to get it done. Sent in offers. No counter offers were put in. So it's just drawn out. I think she's just drawing that out so that she leads me, basically. It's worked. Now you're going to crippling debt. At some point, you're going to have to give up and wave the white flag while making lawyers really rich. You have funded a really nice lifestyle for some lawyers. Oh, for sure. I'm sure they're building pools in their backyard. I mean, at some point, we just need to make this a peace treaty and cut our losses or take what you can get. Come to a compromise. I don't know how to do that. Is it all or nothing for you? Let's say, what's a decent scenario? That you get some of these shares? The company has a clause that clearly states how the shares get split in the case of a divorce, and they write a check for whatever the court determines. So actually, the company is very simple. It's a simple process. So then what's from the legal perspective? Why is it drug out? If it's that simple, what you're saying, I don't understand why all the lawyers don't see that. Yeah, it was discovery. Discovery was the longest part of the process and the forensic accounting part. But it cost money. That cost money. I knew that it was going to be... We had separate assets, and I hear it all the time with you guys. We lost you, Chris. Chris? Yes. Okay. Well, you said discovery was the longest. Is it over? Because you said you guys kind of found everything, but then the stocks changed over in March. So now we're in April. So what's your final... Because you don't want to live five more years like this, Chris. No, we're looking at possibly... So my lawyer has told me that we have a meeting in May, and then we determine what the next trial date is, and that's supposedly going to be September. And they're going to keep working on this thing that whole time? Yes. So this could go a whole another year before there's some resolution, which means you're another hundred grand in debt easily. Yes, but I don't know how to get out of that. I mean, you're stuck in the process. What's your net worth today? Yeah, how much do you have, Chris? I mean, house, your assets, where are you at financially? I still have two properties in the Carolinas that I own outright. One burned down my wife filed for divorce in February of 23, and then the house burned down a week later up in the Carolinas. Okay, how much are those worth? Probably $50,000. And then the other properties, about $15,000, $16,000. What's your total net worth? Wait, a property? Is it just land? I had a house. I had a house, and it burned down. It got set on fire. So the land is only worth 15 grand? 50 grand for that land. And then the land across the street is about $16,000. What's your income? Those two properties. I have my own company, and it fluctuates. Last month, I made $30,000. This month, I'll probably make $5,000. So overall, probably about $100,000. I work on medical equipment. Man, personally, I know this is like your sunk cost fallacy. I would cut my losses and go, you can rebuild a great life and build wealth from scratch. You're a smart guy. You'll get there. I also know that you could burn another $150,000 on the off chance you can make half a million a year. I just don't think the risk is worth it and the stress. It's going to take years off your life to keep this battle up emotionally and mentally on top of financially. I would sell those properties. I wouldn't be a landlord. I don't think there's any occupancy in this situation. So I'd go ahead and just get rid of those properties. Sell that and fund it if you're going to keep fighting this. Yeah. And that's 66 grand that you'll have to help at least pay off some of this credit card debt. And I think, Chris, you have to make a decision to say, okay, whatever that breaking point is for you, we're never going to tell you to continue to go into debt. So yourself, if you're choosing to kind of play that game, you at least, please, you at least need a point in your mind to say, if we get to X point on the calendar and nothing has moved or there's no set, there's nothing. Even if a trial date keeps moving out, you can't just live in the cycle forever and ever, like George said. This is the same part of your brain like a gambling addict where they just go, well, I just got to double down. This time is going to be different. I'm going to get it this time. Yes. I just don't think it's worth it when you're a smart guy making great money. Well, and it's a little confusing if it's so clear in the bylaws of the company of what happens to the shares in the case of a divorce, how that's not- It would have happened by now. Yeah. Maybe I'm being naive, right? And again, I know every divorce is very different. Every state is different, whatever, but how it's just not spelled out like that. And then that's part of all the assets that are divvied up and everything. So my fear is that you've been in a three-year rollercoaster that there's no clarity. It's not a battle for custody of your children. It's just about, I could have had a gigantic pile of money and I won't have that. Yeah. That sucks. I would grieve that and move on. Absolutely. Oh, sorry, Chris. Hope that's helpful. It's probably not the advice you wanted, but sometimes it is just to cut the ties, just to get everything settled and be done and move on. Zander is the best place to find term life insurance to protect your family. Visit Zander.com for quotes today.