SURPRISING BEST FRIEND FOR HIS BIRTHDAY (scary)

So what's, uh, what's going on, huh? What's the deal? We're taking you somewhere. To the desert. We're gonna put you down. Alright, that's fine. Better sooner rather than later, you know what I mean? Do you know where we're going? Don't touch me. Alright. Uh, no. Okay, but like seriously, you think you have an idea? I think I have an idea. If he, I told him if he guessed, I would literally write him a check for a thousand dollars. I literally could cash it right now. I could go to the bank right now and take out a thousand dollars. Where's the general area? I thought you had a guess. Well I did, but you said movies, so like that doesn't really narrow it down. No, I said it wasn't about the movies. Oh, I thought you said it was about movies. No. Oh, so I have no idea. Oh. I thought you were gonna take to like a location, like from a Tarantino movie or something. Oh. Ah. Birthday surprise. Like here's a free house to look at. Yeah. I don't know how much better this is. Babe! No, I don't think it has to do with movies. I mean, kind of. This could be awful. But let's just say the last person I took for his birthday, he really liked it and he's into, oh I can't even give you hints. Brandon, what are some things you're into? Some things that I'm into? What's your favorite thing to talk about? Movies. No. Really? What's something you'll bring up in every other sentence? F*** off. What are you talking about, babe? Decline that. Oh, every other sentence? Oh, hypochondria, diseases and stuff. Like health. Oh. Something that you really bring up. I think all the time. Literally the one thing I hate the most about you. Ah, yeah. That's a good one. It's hard for me to figure that out because I, you know, like I'm not, I don't think it's a bad quality. I can't think of the things that you hate about me. If you weren't here right now, where would you rather be? Orange County. Oh my god. It's all an act. It's all an act? What's an act? What's going on? I know, this is like the one thing you talk about all the time that I f***ing can't stand. Whoa! What do you want the most? Pancakes. I don't know what you're talking about. Wow. Okay, that's a surprise. Let's just wait. That's the one thing I want the most? Are you gonna kill me? On the right track. Okay. Close. What's another word for someone that's been killed? Offed. And they are considered... Deceased. Or... Dead. Okay. Taking me to the dead... Dead... What? Close. Do that. Close. It's a thing I talk about more than anything else. Oh, you already got it. We're already there. Yeah. We're in the area. Yeah, we're already there. It has to do with things that are dead. Oh, um... Is it the Museum of Death? Close. Very close. Did you dig up someone's corpse and you're gonna show it to me? Yeah. Whose? It's me. It is a museum, he said. Museum of Death. Okay, now think of that on wheels. Museum of Death on wheels? Your car. Your Tesla when you drive. I don't know. David gets so frustrated. Yeah, why do you get so upset? It's like... I'm not frustrated. Yes, you're like, come on, it's fine. We'll figure it out when we get there. Museum of Death on wheels? Hollywood tour bus? Taking me on a Hollywood tour? Bingo! Taking me on a Hollywood tour? A Hollywood death tour. Of death. Oh, really? Wherever I was murdered. Awesome. That's actually cool. And David is going to be in your Instagram photo series. Whichever photo you choose. Oh my god! Handshort film! Yes! Oh my god, David, I'm gonna start writing right now. Wait, where are you going? I'm gonna start throwing myself out. Seven hours. And you'll be starring in this week's Trisha's Patreon videos. Really? Your own nude spread. Are you just gonna Photoshop my head on your body? I love the excitement in Brandon's voice when he's just talking about death just now. We can hear it. Always gets so excited about dying and death. Well, no, it's just because it's interesting. I find that stuff interesting in L.A. You think about L.A., it's this pulpy, bright place where dreams happen. But then there's death that happens all the time here. You love this stuff. I don't talk about this every day. You talk about death every time. I think I'm dying. I think I have cancer. Check this out. But that's different. That's my own death. I don't talk about other people's deaths. This is going to give you an experience of what it's like to be around you all the time. Three and a half hours of this tour is going to be being around Brandon and helping you for three and a half hours. Maybe he'll meet a girl that's really into death on the tour. You know what? Drew did. He met this girl. She was by herself. She was like crazy. And she was by herself and he met her on the tour. That would be so sick, actually. You need a girl who appreciates death like you do. All right, I had to go park the car. And now we're going to go to the Museum of Death. I love Brandon so much, man. He's one of my best friends. Whoa! Woo! Whoa! Woo! Whoa! Woo! Whoa! Brandon is one of my best friends in the world. And I love him so... Whoa! Look at him go! Holy cow! Woo! Look at that! Oh, he's out in the back! Woo! Look at this thing, Dave! Look at him go! Check it out. Yeah. Dave's going to leave, I guess. No, I actually want to do it, but I know I won't be able... I won't shoot because it's too sad. And then I won't be able to add it. But I do want to see it, though, when I have time. Yeah, sure. Look at this guy. Oh, I got him! Yeah! Woo! Dude, he's on fire! Look at him go! It doesn't matter. Oh, got it. Yeah, no, he ran off. He was too scared. No, that's happened to more than just one person. Really? You too scared? On Friday the 13th, a girl came running out of there. Her eyes were as big as saucers. She was so scared that she was with a group of eight men. Wow. Whoa! What's it with death scaring people so much? It's just death. Richard's here, the guy who owns the company. And he does the Manson Tour every year. The Maryland Manson Tour? Yeah, I know. Well, they should put him on there. They go next to, you know, where Sharon Tate died. The house next door is owned by a guy named Ohm. Supposedly, Sharon Tate's ghost has migrated to that house. It's the one place my boss will not go in the basement. Really? We've had ghost people in the museum. There's a lot of energy there, but it's not negative. You can imagine. I mean, that's the car Jane Mansfield died in. That's kind of what freaked me out. I didn't think about it. And then when you realize it's Marsha Hardigay's mother, too. Oh my God, that's so creepy. Well, welcome to the celebrity death scandal. First dates on my tour? Yeah. Any people, like, bring their sweetheart and be like, hey, babe, you want to have a fun little time? We mostly have people that book it as a lark and then go, oh my God, what have I done? Yeah. This is the Jewish part of the cemetery on this side. Hey now. Now we're going to go by our first scandal. Really? Doesn't take long in Hollywood. This one involves a tiny little gift shop called Fancyful over here. It's owned by Scientologists. Okay, that's not the scandal. Every time Harvey Weinstein would make a boo-boo in New York, they'd call there, here, all the way to California and say, I'll find a florist in New York you haven't called yet. We have to send another I'm sorry gift. The list was over 300 florists. What? It's not just death tour, it's scandal tour. I like that. Are we going to Jake Paul's house? Whose house? Are we going to Jake Paul's house? No, but I have a little J. Paul Getty scandal for you. Really? When I first came here from Chicago, I got a job at the Getty working for a curator. After they got done, her assistant came back from a pregnancy leave so they traded me to the Institutional Archives. I read all of John Paul Getty's love letters you know, he at one point married a twin and then f***ed the other twin on that tour. It took me a year and a half of waiting to get on that tour. Are we going to Jake Paul's house? Now, what about this place? It looks really nice. This is an orphanage, a working orphanage they call them group homes. Marilyn Monroe, this is a new building but she was on the second floor in the women's dorm. He said Jake Paul. Somehow, she's gouging his eyes out she gets out of the car she's wandering down the street he takes off so the neighbors hear the commotion they call the police. By the time the police come in she's already to the stop sign she's covered in blood. She's calling her assistant this guy's beating the crap out of me he's crazy, get me out of here. Rihanna is still the queen of Coachella Queen B tried to take her throne but she still has the desert sexy slutty, sassy look. Rihanna did a whole conceptual thing Rihanna still rocks Coachella every year. I look pretty, I know. You go from talking about Rihanna you get beat out of her she's the queen of Coachella she tops Beyonce any day of the week. You gotta keep it light at some point. Ma'am, you're missing a crucial this is where Logan Paul used to live. Logan Paul and Amanda Cerny used to live in this apartment complex why have you not brought that up yet? Put that on the tour. We're actually talking about the Holocaust Museum here but I'll switch it up from now on. That is where Amanda Cerny lived though. Was it? Jake and Logan lived in one apartment and Amanda lived in the same apartment complex. That vine I did with Amanda Cerny that you love, you did in that apartment. Shut up. The hot girl one? Shut up. No thanks, nerd. Do you really love Amanda Cerny? No. Shut up. What if he died right here? Wouldn't that be crazy on this tour? No. We almost saw somebody die the other day. The police were coming and a guy didn't stop. You could have put a thimble between him. It was crazy. The lady in the front seat said I have to change my pants now when we get to the front of the air. Have you seen anyone die on this tour? Not on this tour, no. I've seen some people die. There was a guy in front of me. Oh, you told me this. I had to watch him die, basically. Did he die? It's kind of weird. He just plopped dead. Was he someone that went to Black Angus a lot? Are we going to Jake Paul's house? Team 10 house? No, they're not going to Jake Paul's. We were two feet from Jake Paul's house yesterday. What? Nixing is a crime of passion. If they say a thin line between love and hate, have you ever been so mad at someone you're dating you feel like strangling them? Probably not. This next scene is just that. What did you say? Let's get married here. What is this, the courthouse? Let's get married here, guys. It's only $1,200 to get married there. What's the Rohini Mansion? The one I was telling you about where the guy got shot? It has its own story. Why don't you like marriage? That's what I say. Why don't you like marriage? I was married twice. I suck at it. Marriage is the hardest job you're ever going to have. There's going to be times where you're going to be like, I cannot bend on this. You must compromise. This is a death ride, but this is killing my mood right now. Why weren't you good at marriage? Because I had the eye. The wandering eye. I also traveled. I was a professional musician for 25 years. I've been all over the world. The wandering eye. I couldn't keep my pants on. Why couldn't you keep your pants on? Because I had to keep changing them? It's the thrill of falling in love over and over and over again. It's a lot more exciting than the thrill of having to look at somebody who leaves their underwear all over the floor. You can fall in love over and over again with the same person. Mary Poppins is here. Farrah Fawcett is here. Minnie Rippins is here. Ray Bradbury is here. Three years ago, they'd be like, this is Marilyn Monroe's thing. Next to it, Hugh Hefner bought it. Now he's actually here. I can come back in 10, 20 minutes. Let's do 10. It's funny to hear you say you think death is depressing because you talk about it all the time. Me? I do not. I don't like to talk about it because it puts it out there. I just don't even like thinking about it, talking about it. I don't want anyone around me to die. I always tell people, I never want to die. Everyone's like, oh, I'm worried about Trisha. I never want to die. Never will kill myself. If it comes out I commit suicide, you know it's not, and then you should investigate it. Maybe we should go to Jim Morrison's grave in Paris. Oh, can we go to Paris and go to Disneyland too? That would be cool. Supposed to be like, really interesting. You would travel all the way to Paris just to see a dead man? No, but I would, if I was in Paris, I would swing by. I really just wanted something to say on my vlog. I don't really care actually. When I was 18, I wanted to be one of Hugh Hefner's girlfriends. I sent like my picture up just literally to the Playboy Mansion address. And they're like, hey, you should come up front and send. Like someone called me like from the Playboy Mansion. I was like, you should come up front and send. So I got invited for like maybe a year and a half. Every Sunday I'd go up there and they give you free food because they have chefs. So you can get quesadillas, smoothies, you can get whatever you want. And so none of the girls ate, which I thought was weird. But I was like, oh, free quesadillas. And I probably gained about 15 pounds and they take a full interview every time. And I honestly, they just, they told me they're like, oh, we're not having fun in the sun one day. And then like the next day, oh, it's canceled. And then literally they're just never call me again. Like never call me. Hugh Hefner was like kind of like feeling me up and down. And he's like, oh, we got a little extra here. No. And it's a video called Celebrities Who Call Me Fat. And I talk about this and I'm like, and I was mortified because I was like, I wasn't like fat at all back then. And I was just like, what? Like I was so mortified. Oh my gosh. He also told me I needed a boob job. And so that's why I got one. Really? He told me my boobs looked deflated. And he was like 80. I got kicked out for some reason. You got to make pals with Scott, the guy who owns the company, because he's like death obsessed, right? Really? It's no joke. He wears that Future Corpse shirt every day. Should we get that for you, Jason? Future Corpse? Your number one seller? Our number one seller. It's really the shirts that are like, our company's known for. Where's your podcast tonight? What do you mean? Can we all get Future Corpse t-shirts? Sure. Jonesy, thank you. You know where I'm at if you need me. All right. Bye, Jonesy. Me. Yeah. You know, that should be on Instagram. Watch out, watch out, Brandon. He died right here after the death tour. By a bird scooter of all things. Yeah!