He Thinks He Deserves To Go Into Debt For A Truck

Brought to you by the EveryDollar app. Start budgeting for free today. I just have a question about how you would handle a situation when you disagree with your spouse about going into debt. Tell us the tea. What's going on? So it's regarding our vehicles. We both drive paid-off vehicles. I drive a 2022 Ford Expedition, which we bought, used, went into a little bit of debt, but paid it off very quickly. My husband drives a 2019 Toyota 4Runner and has wanted a truck for a long time and is kind of done waiting. We've prioritized other financial goals for a long time, and now he just thinks he wants to go into debt to get it. Why would you have to go into debt? Well, let me ask a couple questions. Do you guys still have debt or everything's gone now? Everything's gone. We have a fully funded emergency fund. We have three kids, two of which have 529, so we're saving for their college. We fully fund our Roth IRAs every month. So you're financially responsible adults, is what I would say. What is on fire that he needs to sacrifice all that you've built? I mean, why can you guys not save up and pay cash for this truck? Yeah, I think we can. I think it would take some time to save up the difference between the trade-in value and then we got some other money set aside. How long would it take? I would say probably a year, maybe less than that, if we were working extra hard. Well, forget the trade-in. What if you sold at private party and got five grand more for the 4Runner and then use that towards the truck on top of your savings? So I would actually do some math and go, okay, what truck are we getting? Is it a used truck? It is, and it's about 55,000. Okay. And what could he sell his 4Runner for private party? I would say probably about 30. Okay. So you have a $25,000 gap. How much could you guys put aside right now towards that savings goal every month? Every month, probably between $1,000 and $1,500. Okay. So this is going to take longer than a year based on that math. Well, we've got about $1,500. We've set it aside for our oldest daughter's vehicle, but that's about five or six years down the road. So we could use that. That's outside of our emergency fund. So we were thinking we could also use some of that cash to fund the truck. And then you'd restart the car fund for her? Correct. Okay. That's reasonable. And then she'd also be working too. That, hey, if we put this much away every month, January or December of 2026, you can get the car. I want to get to the bottom of him though, because when you tell me this, Mary, I'm thinking everybody wants a brand new car tomorrow, right? I'm looking out in the Do you want a car tomorrow? Do you want one? We all want a brand new car tomorrow. So there's this adult part of us that says, that's not the way the world works. And I personally consider it pretty abnormal, not in the Ramsey verse, but out in the world, pretty abnormal to say, and not only do I want a new car, a new to me car, but I could save to get it in a year. That's pretty spectacular. And I think that he needs to be brought back down to earth to say, most people would love a brand new car and could not afford to save up because they've got other debt, other, other things to worry about. They could not save up for it for a year. So it's almost like he's lost perspective on what you've accomplished and what it allows you to do that is so much different than the average American. Does that make sense? Yeah, I agree a hundred percent. And I think that's why I'm calling because, um, this is just sort of a fork in the road. And I'm kind of to the point where I'm like, okay, do we just do this? So he kind of... No, don't concede. Cause here's the thing. Okay. His brain is ahead of his bank account. It's that simple. And so you need to say, we worked our butts off to get out of debt. It is a value of both of us that we are not a family who goes into debt. We're done. That's an old us that is gone. That toddler raging inside of us, that instant gratification, that's, that's the past. We're not doing that in the future. We're adults. We've been thinking about it a long time. Let's save for a long time. And so if he wants it faster, work harder, dude, go make more money, cut more expenses. That's the conversation to have tonight. I don't know if we can convince him. You don't get between a man and a truck. I would, I would stand firm. There are very, okay, this is, we're getting into marriage stuff here. So George, there's very few things that with Sam, I put, I like put my stake in and I'm like, you know what? And I'll tell him ahead of time, this is something I don't think I'm going to budge on. Like we're going to have this conversation a lot of times. Like, Hey, I'll make it couch. Cause you'll be sleeping over there. Yes. Especially like if I know that I, if I know I'm right and I'm talking, I always think I'm right. But when I really think I'm right, I, there are certain things that you have to say, you know what? And I think this would be one of those, Mary, that I would say, this is something that is very important to me. And I don't see myself rolling over on this anytime soon. And here's why. And I'd be, I'd be getting firm. I'd be getting in my stance. Just saying. Yeah. And I feel like I've done that. He thinks I'm a hypocrite because we were into debt to buy my vehicle three years ago. But was it against his will? No, no. It was not. It was back when you were both stupid. Right. And now you're both smart. Like you got to remind him of this, be like, that was old us. We've transformed since then. We were both doing stupid stuff back then, but then we got smart. Why would we go back? He's like, well, I get to do it once too. You know, it truly is just the toddler inside of us. And it's going, I want big twerk. And you're like, well, you can have big twerk one year from now. I want big twerk now. And it's like, okay, we can all throw our tantrum. But at some point he has to realize that he has a family. He has a wife. It's not just him making stupid decisions. It affects other people in his life. Namely you right now. Yeah, I agree. So he's going to have that truck and it's going to be so much sweeter when he walks in there and writes a check and walks away. And he actually owns that truck instead of being underwater on it or worrying about a payment after you guys worked so hard to get out of debt. Now you're back in baby step two, stressed out with three kids. You guys have a lot of expenses coming up between college and cars. He's got fatigue. Is this a midlife crisis, Mary? Is he just done? He's like, how old is he? A little bit 37. You know, I talk about this in the book. I'm going to go to this real quick because, and I'm probably going to, let's go ahead and send them a copy. I don't know if he'll read it. Maybe he'll do the audio version. But I talk about this. It's this fatigue that sets in and it makes you mad. It makes you angry. It's in the anger chapter. When you're making a good income, you've done so many things right, but you're still not at whatever you think the finish line should be. And there's just certain things that you think, I deserve that. I work hard. I did this. And you look at the list of accomplishments and you go, I deserve to have XYZ. And in his mind, it's, I deserve to have this truck. And that is such a dangerous place to be that I deserve because it is just, we saw it with COVID when there was the revenge spending, we had to be locked up in our houses and we couldn't see our families and we had to wear a mask. And as a result, I'm going to buy all the Lululemon that I'm going to Italy. And it is a, it's a natural response. So I'm not mad at your husband, but I do want to stop him from doing something that I think he's actually going to regret because then next thing you know, he's going to be the one calling the show talking about, I bought a truck. And next thing I know, I'll lose, I lost my job. My wife's mad at me. Right. So we're just trying to help him. I'll send you a copy of the book. What's your household income. Okay. Thank you. Hey, what's your household income, Mary, before you go? About 170. Okay. And what's your car worth? Probably 55. We, we bought it for, I think, 60 back in 2023 when we had our third. Okay. Well, here's, here's what I want to throw out there. Our parameter around cars and things that go down in value, boats, motorcycles, whatever, is that it should add up to no more than half of your annual income. So the truth is you guys are going to have way too much car considering your income and your financial world. And so here's my compromise. He can have the truck now if he goes out and gets a $25,000 car and sells his forerunner. Could we find a sweet truck? Yeah, I've suggested that. How much better are they five years later? Is the technology really that much better? I don't know. I don't really care about trucks, but he, he does. Well, he just wants the newest, shiniest thing. I would say here's the compromise. We can use whatever cash we have now to get the truck that we can afford with that amount of money. And if we can't afford that, you want a nicer truck, we got to wait and we have to make more money. It's way too much of our world to have $110,000 tied up with things going down in value, even when we make $170,000. Create your free every dollar budget today. The simplest way to budget for your life.