The Super Mario Bros. Movie Review - Are The Critics Wrong?

It's been a long time since the cinematic masterpiece Super Mario Bros. hit theaters in the 90s. Bob Hoskins, John Leguizamo, America's Sweethearts put on the big screen as plumbers fighting Bowser and saving Princess... Daisy, I think. Uh, listen, that movie was a complete disaster. This was Nintendo's opportunity, along with Illumination, to set things right in 2023 with the Super Mario Bros. movie. How does it fare? Oh-ho-ho! Stick around, I'll tell you. When the trailers first hit, I think everybody was pleasantly surprised with what they saw unfold on the big screen, or on the small screen, depending on what screen you watch that trailer from. Probably a small screen. The thing that stood out as a negative, as a hair in the ointment, that's an expression I just came up with, is Chris Pratt's voice as Mario. Didn't sound like the plumber, and, uh, you know, it's Chris Pratt. We're kind of getting oversaturated with the guy. I don't mind him. He does a good job in certain roles, certain roles, eh, he just kind of does this, and that's really all it takes. Owen, dinosaurs. It was fine. It wasn't scorched earth bad, it makes sense in the movie, and the movie itself is a little better than fine as well. It's not the greatest thing, you know, it's not the be-all end-all. Certainly better than that last Mario movie, although that bar was in the ground. I'm gonna make like there's a fictitious block above my head and jump into this review without giving any spoilers away. I do want to ask you though, if you could grab a wrench and just smash on that subscribe button for me, that would be great. As I post tons of movie content each and every week, gotta have you stick around. I think I said wait, but we're gonna keep moving past it. We have a cavalcade of characters here, from Luigi, to Mario, to Peach, to Bowser, to Donkey Kong. A lot, a lot of, a lot of people showing up in this thing, and the voices are equally as impressive. Not only do we have Pratt, but we have Charlie Day from Always Sunny in Philadelphia, we have Anya Taylor-Joy, or however you say her name, she's Peach. We have Seth. In my mind, I was thinking Joe Rogan would be funny as Donkey Kong. Seth Rogan voicing Donkey Kong. Keegan-Michael Key, because of course, he's somehow in every single animated movie doing a voice. It could be a sunflower, it could be a boulder in the background. Keegan-Michael Key's in the picture. He's getting paid regardless. The big standout though, is of course Jack Black as Bowser. He stole the show in the trailers, he steals the final product as well. Although, Anya Taylor-Joy as Peach, pretty solid as well. I have to say, I saw the negatives on Rotten Tomatoes. I didn't read them, I just saw the percentage. 48% at the time. Critics are, I guess, not liking this, and I'm just trying to figure out why. Part of me thinks it's Illumination, so they're already having a big stick up their ass about that, but I'm kind of okay with Illumination. It's family-friendly, it's surface level, it's nothing deep, okay? Typically fart jokes. Thankfully, none here. They shied away from that. They shy-guided away from that, if you will. What it does have though, is a fast hour and a half runtime. Solid storyline. It's a little all over the place at times, and they definitely rushed through it very quickly, but it gets the playbook in check. Mario's a plumber, he goes to this magical world, Mushroom Kingdom, he meets the princess, he's gotta save the day. It's not like the video game's complex. In fact, the story here is already far more structured and deeper than you're ever gonna get from a Mario game, and that's absolutely fine. This is an all-ages affair, alright? An all-ages affair. Your kid's gonna love it, your 90-year-old grandma's gonna love it, long as she can get off her ass and go to the theater. Otherwise, she'll wait for him to come home. Check it out in the peacock. Check it out in the cock, as I like to say. I think maybe some people just were rubbed the wrong way by Chris Pratt initially announced, or just the fact that he exists at this point. I don't know. People are crazy. People are crazy all over. They get a chip on their shoulder about someone that they heard something about, and they're just like, we're done with you. We're scorched earth in this. Pratt's fine. Pratt's perfectly fine. There's a lot of nostalgia in this thing. It's heavy on gamer nostalgia. If you haven't played the games for some reason, if you've never played a single Mario game, you're still gonna be fine. There's plenty to enjoy. It's a visual feast. We know what Illumination movies look like. This is easily the best, and I know they're not known for their upper echelon, top pedigree of visuals, but this is pretty damn nice looking. It's also action-packed. You get Mario Kart references. It's in the trailer. That's not a spoiler. You get power-ups. You get a lot of things branching a ton of decades of video gaming. There's Mario history from 1, 2, 3, all the way up to Odyssey, and I'm here for it. I've played a large amount of these games, so every little detail, every little easter egg, not only from the Mario world, but also from other games from the past, was very fun to see. Absolutely a great time. I took my two kids. They had a blast, and they don't have that nostalgia like I do. They've played some of the newer stuff. I think they've played Mario 1 a few times, dabbled in Mario 3, tried out that Tanooki suit, took it for a spin, jumped on a couple dry bones, and called it a day. They love this movie as well. I don't think either of them thought, wow, this was the greatest thing ever. We need to go again. I don't think anybody will think that, but it is a very entertaining, easy watch, in and out an hour and a half. That's really all. Oh, and the music. The music is probably the greatest thing ever. You have so many musical chimes from different walks of life. All of this culminates into a beautiful, orchestral, magical experience for the whole family. It's a feast for the eyes. It's a feast for the ears, and I was hungry going in. I left pretty satisfied coming out. I think that was a good analogy. You may have heard, if you've been on the internet, that there are two end credit scenes. Not going to tell you what they are. I will just tell you. If you got better things to do, do them. Neither one of them is at all worth sitting around for. One's just played for jokes. Another one, slight tease. Neither tickled my fancy, as they say. Well, there you have it. My thoughts on the Super Mario movie. It's better than the last one, and it's not a bad time. I'm excited for more in this franchise. We're definitely going to get it. This movie's already making a ton of money. It's already made more than Shazam and Morbius combined. Not that that's saying much, but still very fun. Like I said, I post tons of movie content every week. I'd love for you to jump in a cart, drift your ass up to that subscribe button, just hit that thing, subscribe, like the video if you had some fun. Let's go to that notification bell. Turn that bad boy on so these things populate in your feed. Otherwise, the videos are going to be full of Joe Rogan being Donkey Kong, and we just can't have that. Alright, thanks for watching. Let's head to the game over screen. Hey, thanks again for watching the video. Hope you had a good time. 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