【MAAP】RØØTED SPEEDBALL

最終,這是一項我和邔琦的研究 路肯定是從馬來西亞到伊比薩來的一段無法校正的數據 內容包括一些周邊的疑犯 以觀看者的資訊為主 如果你就是大貓咪 好吧 好吧 好吧 要不是那一個逃跑 No call, text, not even a slide into my DMs, you know, just to see how I'm doing. It's ok baby, 5 years is a long time you know, so much has changed, sort of. Anyway, it will appear we are back here for another attempt of internet cycling fame. So calm these butterflies inside your bib shorts, because this one could be more of a letdown than the last. So without ruining the already spoiled ending, this one doesn't finish so well for the guys. The synopsis was simple. Two strangers with like-minded interests decide to meet in Madrid and make their way to Ibiza in three days for a weekend of unspeakable pleasures. In doing so, they think they will grow to be best friends. Unfortunately, this was not the case. As we all know, these activities can really show one's true colours. It's tense, tiring, and hard on the body. And then there is the actual cycling. Don't worry, I'm sure there's something in here for you, even if you don't want to admit it. Ok, enough flirting, let's begin. Welcome to Rooted. Speedball. Sequence 1. Madrid, Madrid. Here we go. Am I quite nervous? Yeah, of course. After an awkward as-out hug on the meeting, both Frank and Luke missed their connecting flights and had to take the train into the city. They thought a good way to get to know each other would be to have as many beers as humanly possible before they start their expedition to Ibiza the following morning. I mean, what could go wrong? Surely they are both old enough to call it a night before things. You know, get a little out of hand. This place looks fucking dingy. They build their bikes, buy more beer, check in with their loved ones, and decide to head out into the night. See you at 6am boys. Um, it's 11.30am. I'm not angry, but maybe just a little disappointed. Don't they know nothing good happens after midnight? Sequence 2. The beginning of bed. After much effort, they rise from their slumber, get dressed, and roll downstairs for an early lunch or late breakfast. With 479km to the destination, and now only two and a half days to get there, they will now have to make up for lost time. Somehow? They seem to begin with a nice pace through the city, but just when they hit the huge 2.8km mark, Frank's chain decides to break. I mean, I remember my first ride. They hunt down a local bike shop, fix Frank's chain, make a new friend, and finally start their journey to Ibiza. It was going well, until the road they chose appeared to be closed. Don't worry, we got through it, and even set up a multi-camera sequence for us to see the struggles they went through. I love that we're filming each other rather than helping each other. You're going to be really happy with this scene, I'm just going to tell you. It's fantastic. Yeah, it was. So, they did in fact ride a huge 64km before the scary starts to kick in. I don't know what's wrong with me. Like, I feel, um... I think this is maybe the issue that we've drank and fucked up, so you don't recover that well. Now Luke thinks that the best way to put last night's antics behind them is to find some endorphin-fueled motivation. With a quick Google search of clubs open near me, they seem to be in luck. Now, with a new swing in the pedals, the pace seems to improve dramatically. Unfortunately though, every place within a 30km radius seems to be closed down. So, there's where it gets a bit sticky. So I think now's a good time for some hindsight commentary. Cut to Luke, post-ride. You know, day one set us up for failure, but we sort of purposely didn't plan the trip to sort of create a bit of, you know, spontaneous riding and adventure along the way. But I think the main problem was we just weren't enthusiastic to ride. I mean, we all have these days where we wake up and just don't want to ride. But for some reason, every day was like this. Maybe it was our fitness levels, or maybe that every route we could find to get to the ferry was pretty much on gravel. So I wasn't equipped for that. But yeah, I don't know what really was the problem. But there was something. So yeah, we decided to sort of reset, try to find a day club to have a beer and sort of regroup, come together and find a sort of new game plan because we were so late starting. And then unfortunately for me, I was trying to film Frank ride and went straight into a pothole. Oh my God. Are you OK? Fucking hell. What just happened? At first glance, Luke's little spill seems to be nothing more than a bruised ego. But it turned out he did in fact need a little medical attention. A kind gentleman called Steve stopped to help them and told them his daughters were nurses and would give him a few stitches before sending them on the way. This seems like a good time to conclude the end of sequence two. I think we can all agree that our two little pussycats seems to be struggling a bit. Tiredness, mechanical, shocking navigation and even truly horrifying crash. I guess things can only get better from here. Sequence three, the pain train. As Luke licks his wounds, Frank takes control of the plants. It becomes painfully obvious they will need the assistance of, you guessed it, a train. Luke, I know what you're thinking. Cheaters. Grow up. It was only one time. And I didn't mean anything. I swear. The station is 100 kilometers away. It will get them back on track to the last 200 kilometers the following day. I think I would have preferred just to be the first night as it was. I don't know. We were in bed by, I don't know, 4 a.m. or something. I don't remember going to bed by 10 and not having that night and having a smashing day the first day, you know. But I think it's more fun to just see what happens. Frank! Oh, it's like our little Luke. Why? He's now all alone. Fucking hell. He could starve out there. Just kidding. It's only a flat. Frank! Fucking shit. Wanker. Eventually he realized he too was all alone. But it was at this point where something in the air changed between them. Maybe it was stress. Or maybe it was just each other's subconscious blaming the other for things. Something was going wrong. Whatever it was seems to be giving the other a cold shoulder. It's okay. That's why I'm here. To keep you edging a little bit longer. Would you believe they made a train? They sat in silence for the duration of this small trip. They sparkled through the night. It's still awkward. Sequence 4. Ibiza, baby. With pain comes intense pleasure. Just look at the water. You can almost taste the caviar dripping from their dry lips. As we begin the final chapter, it's important to remind ourselves on how lucky it is to even be able to do this kind of thing. I mean, sure, they walked up hills, got caught up cheating, and their relationship turned toxic. But at the end of the day, it's an experience we all learn from and maybe even inspire each other to be better. I mean, sorry, I'm just kidding. They pay me to say this. I think these boys need to take a long hard look at themselves. The good news is they found a shortcut, so they should be able to make the last ferry over. I mean, come on, guys. Now look, I didn't want to put you through another talking head, but I think Luke needs to get something off his chest. To be honest, I don't think either of us are to blame for this bromance that never blossomed. You know, we've all got our own annoyances and little things that sort of tinker away. And especially when you're writing, you're so exposed to one another and each other's vulnerabilities or each other's frustrations. Yes, we found that in a failed adventure. But I think what we can take away from this whole experience is that we love the bike. There's a reason we love the bike. And we'll always come back to the bike. So I think Frank and I can thank each other for rekindling that love of cycling again from this shit experience. Oh, cute. Well, during the heartfelt rumble, they have eyes on the mesa. Up at the ocean. With their dead souls, stinky and washed shimmies and still not really on talking terms. A certain feeling inside both of them seems to be percolating. I mean, who wouldn't be getting a low pulsation in the tummy? Riding head first into a three-day bender. They board the ferry. Taking the sexy sunset. Reflect a bit. They have some champagne on arrival. Hug it out. And immerse themselves into the darkness of the night. Well, that's it, I guess. I'll see you around. Don't act like you don't love it.