Contemporary Monologue

I do, I know. I sometimes swerve. I was thinking, you know, when I was little my parents made me take tennis lessons, and I am not an athlete, neither are my parents, so I don't know why. Well, it's because the lessons were free, and it was summer, and my parents didn't want me just sitting around the house doing nothing, which is what they thought I was doing, which was true, and so they made me take lessons, even though I was a klutz, and I tried, okay, but I'm a natural klutz, and so still at the end of the summer we had to play in these tournament things against the kids from the other classes. I remember I got paired against this kid who was obviously taking tennis lessons because she actually wanted to be really good at tennis. I can't even return her shoes. Like, the match lasts like 10 minutes, and afterwards my parents, I mean, they can't even speak. They feel so bad. So, they take me to Dairy Queen, tell me I can get whatever I want. I get the triple banana split, and for the rest of the summer they just let me sit around and watch which is all I really wanted to do anyway, so.