The Hardest Thing I’ve Ever Done to Improve My Magic

So, this is a bit of an unusual video. Um, I just came up with the idea now of doing this. I hope it's useful to some people. Uh, I think it would have been to me had I watched it. So, I have been doing the same a lot of the same material for many many years. And over the last few years, I'm just not happy with it. It's fine. It works. People like it, but it just feels like it's always needed work. And back from being a street performer, I've always worked on it on stage, which is fine. And recently more and more I've just got I need I was saying this for years. I need to script it. Not every single word because I improvised a lot, but I need to look at everything I perform and want to perform and really analyze it. And it's purgatory. I The reason I put it off is because again ADHD I to sit here and do this and not be moving around and practicing skills is is horrible. And I do get into the writing side of it but not for long. and then I get quite anxious. So, I've kind of bit of a buildup to this over the last few days of really kind of thinking about it and thinking about it, obsessing over it, and still not doing it. I said to myself this morning, I'd get out of bed, come straight down here at 7:00 after taking a dog for a week and not do anything before sitting here and, you know, getting the transcription of my performances up there and starting to write. And even then, even though I was sitting here, I did everything to avoid it. I started trying to learn something for a review. I started checking my emails. I started looking at Facebook. I started really convincing myself that those were the things that I should do. I also started doing things out there like oh maybe I'll make another cup of tea and luckily I've been analyzing my time using a thing called timely I think it's time I can't remember I'll do a separate thing on that because people have asked me and realizing how much time I'm doing or spending doing those things of that I convince myself of oh maybe I need another cup of tea maybe I should have some more water maybe I oh maybe the dog should go out again or maybe I know I need to do a review now and and just years and years of that really and actually going, "No, you need to do this and you need to do it for an uncomfortable amount of time because I'm going to get to the end of my life and still not have done it, which sounds morbid. I know hopefully it won't happen yet." So, I thought I'd make a video in when I'm in the middle of it because so many of us find it uncomfortable. So part of it is to say you're not alone. And the other thing is I convinced myself that it won't be useful. And I've been sitting here now for four nearly 5 hours and I'm going to have a break in a minute and it's been profoundly enlightening. So, the first thing I've done is trying I'm trying to order the routines as well because they're all over the place. Um, but I've transcribed my routines using a piece of software. I can't. If you just Google transcription software to transcribe video, there's loads of different things and you can get a trial. And it's when you read what I say and I know some of it you've got to be there really and it's going to read badly anyway. But there is so much nonsense, so much horit talk, especially in newer routines cuz you can tell I'm kind of insecure about starting to perform them. So, I'm talking in the audience and it just goes on and on and it's and yeah, they're enjoying it and then some people are laughing and stuff, but it's just I'm not saying it's really bad because that's like saying I go on and people pay me to perform and I do bad performances. I'm not. But it can be so much better. And also the tricks themselves, you know, I'm watching a phase of a trick gun that's just not needed, you know, that's I need to cut that phase. I love it, but it's it it kills the rhythm. And sometimes it's not easy to do that. So I have shown my friends. So me and my friend Stuart and this is really the first time I've done this Stuart Davis who edits my podcast. He's lovely magician and human being you know we we w it was it was agony. We watched one of my shows and even though I wasn't thinking this is awful, it's good. It's some some bits are lovely and great, but it could be just so much more concise and I'm quite good at sticking to time, but sometimes I run out of routines and go, "Oh, I can't really fit the cube routine in now because, you know, I've had a laugh about this with the audience for 5 minutes." And I've got to remember, I don't want to be a stand-up comedian. I mean, I do. I'd love to be, but I'm a magician, so I need to stop doing the I want to be funny, please like me as much as I am. and um and do you know get those routines in that I want to fit into the show. It's a really really interesting exercise and also it's painful. It's difficult on video. It's hard because videos, you know, as Alexander M Alex Malleier, sorry, you know, was um Alexander Marsh, Alex Mackleier in the podcast we recently recorded was saying, you know, it's a fixed camera. Sometimes it's your phone, so it kind of looks and sounds weird anyway. So, it's a hard thing to analyze, but I think sometimes that helps because it makes you just look at the material. So, record your shows, record your closeup, record your tricks performing to family. Be brutal whilst not beating yourself up and know that you're always going to look at it like hearing your own voice. And and sometimes you need other people to trust actually like Stuart did the other day when I was cringing in the corner here wanting to die. Um, Steu was and I said, "Don't be kind to me. I want you to be honest." and he was being, but he said, "No, it's really good. You know, you could maybe just do this and this." So, you need those people as well to make sure you don't watch a video and never ever perform again like I've nearly done. But just, you know, and if you procrastinate about this stuff, do what I've done. I'm still in my pajamas. I haven't done me air. Um, I'm losing my mind, but I'm going to walk away from this being happy. So, there I am. the the try and find a scrap transcription thing, analyze other people's shows, not to copy. That's been insanely useful just for time. So, I've watched a lot of Darren Brown shows. I've watched a lot I've watched Justin Wilman's show in and of itself, not to look at the material, but to look at the dynamic and look at how long do they actually talk because I'm talking for 10 minutes and they're talking for 3 minutes and they're saying a lot more than me. So, that's been really really useful, too. and not tedious watching the shows, but going through them and timing them has been tedious. And I think it's a lot of it's just accepting that if we want to achieve what we want to achieve, we've got to do the uncomfortable, tedious, sometimes painful, sometimes anxiety creating. And if that's the case, it's like getting up, having breaks, going back to it, but not stopping the flow, and doing whatever we need to do to kind of, you know, get the dirty work done before we can um enjoy ourselves on stage or performing truths to anyone. So, I just thought I'd share that with you. I hope it's useful. Ask me any questions. I will get back to you. Um I will if you want to know what the transcription uh software is, I'll tell you, but I'm not quite decided on what one I'm going to stick to at the moment. But it's um it's interesting. So, please follow me on Instagram, Steve Fulner, as well and real magic review. I suppose I'll start doing that as well. And um podcast I just mentioned um Alex Malier's podcast that we've just recorded that's coming out soon. Thanks again to Stuart for editing Steve Faulner's magic show. Search for that. I might change it to Steve Faulner show or the Steve Fner shows. If that doesn't work, search for one of them by the time you're watching this. Cheers. [Music]