Preparing Your Child for the First Day of School

Hey friends, I'm Sarah Baldwin welcoming you to another Sunday with Sarah. Many of you will be sending your child to preschool for the first time in the coming days. So today I'm going to give you a few tips on preparing your child for that special milestone. If you're new here, welcome. I'm Sarah Baldwin. I'm the president of Bella Luna Toys. I'm also a trained and experienced Waldorf early childhood teacher, author, and the mother of two grown Waldorf graduates whose first day of school were about 25 years ago, but I still remember those days like they were yesterday. I'm here today to make sure that the first day of school is as pleasant for you as it will be for your child. So to start, here are some ways you can prepare your child before the first day. Try to make connections with the teacher, with your children's classmates, and the other families in the class ahead of time if you can. Now most Waldorf early childhood teachers will make a home visit with the child before the first day of school. Many parents worry that the teacher is coming to judge their their home, but trust me this is not at all true. The benefit is to make a connection one-on-one between teacher and child in the child's own home environment which is familiar and comfortable. The teacher and child might read a book together or do a puzzle. The child can show the teacher his favorite toys and where he plays outside. Now of course if your child is not going to a Waldorf program this might not be an option that's offered, but you can always invite the teacher over to your house for lunch or for tea and he or she might just say yes. You know other than home visits which I would initiate, parents rarely invited me to their homes, but anytime they did I felt deeply honored and welcomed the opportunity. Now if a visit to your home is still not a possibility, do make a point to visit your child's classroom before the first day of school. Teachers are usually in their classroom in the weeks leading up to the first day getting their classrooms ready for the children. So if the offer hasn't already been extended to visit the classroom ahead of time, just ask if you can come and visit. When you visit you will of course introduce your child to their teacher. Have the teacher show the child around. Show her where she's going to put her things and a cubby where she might put her lunchbox. Show her where the bathroom is, all the toys she'll get to play with and visit the outdoor play area. Have the teacher describe what the first day will be like in as much detail as possible because the more a child knows what to expect on the first day and the fewer surprises the less anxiety there will be. Now if possible try to meet the other kids and families ahead of time. It'll help a child so much if if they're familiar welcoming faces in the classroom on the first day of school. Many schools and programs will arrange a picnic or a potluck for the class families ahead of time. If such an event is planned for your class by all means go. It really does take a village to raise a child and your class community is going to be the village for your child for at least the next year. If your teacher or the school hasn't planned such a gathering well you can suggest it and if they're still not open to planning such a gathering take the initiative on your own and plan a potluck with another parent from the class. You can ask the teacher for a class list with email addresses and extend invitations. Have a gathering at a public park or at someone's home. So now the night before the big first day I suggest that you plan a calm and peaceful evening the night before. Have an early dinner time, a relaxed bath time and time for connection and stories before an early bedtime. Help your child to feel calm and relaxed the night before. Be close and be present for your child. You can also get organized the night before. You can pack your child's snacks or lunch ahead of time. Choose the first day of school clothing that they'll wear and lay out their clothes. I recommend choosing comfortable clothes that kids can really move and play in like sweatpants, shorts or leggings. Most early childhood teachers aren't fans of jeans. Jeans can be stiff or tight they can fall down and if they get wet they're really cold and heavy and slow to dry. Be sure to pack and dress them in clothes that are appropriate for the weather. So even if it's a warm day in early September make sure your child has a sweater, fleece or sweatshirt in case the weather should cool off. If your child is going to a Waldorf program it's likely they'll be spending a lot of time outdoors. In my Waldorf classroom I ask that every child have a rain jacket, rain pants and rain boots to keep at school not only for rainy days but when it was muddy outside or when we would walk down to the stream to play. Set the breakfast table the night before and plan what you will have for breakfast. So now you have some ideas on how to prepare your child for the first day of school ahead of time. Next I'm going to give you some tips on how to make that hard goodbye on the first day a little easier for you and your child. But before I do if you're finding this video helpful please be sure to like this video and subscribe to the Sunday with Sarah YouTube channel. If you click the little notification bell you'll be notified when I post a new video on the first Sunday of each month. I'm also on Instagram live weekly to answer your questions in real time so if you don't already be sure to follow us on Instagram at bellalunatoys one word to be notified whenever I'm live. So now the big day has finally come. On the morning of the first day of school I suggest you rise early allowing yourself plenty of time so that you're not rushed in the morning. Children feel anxious and tempers can flare when we're rushing so allow plenty of time to get to school at a leisurely pace. And even if you're experiencing your own emotions and separation anxiety at the thought of saying goodbye to your child stay calm. Try to stay calm and centered projecting trust and confidence in your child's teacher and certainty that your child will be okay. Meditate in the morning before your child wakes if that helps. When you get to school after greeting the teacher and helping your child hang her things in most cases I recommend not staying more than 10 or 15 minutes on the first day but ask your child's teacher what they recommend. But know that the longer you stay the longer it will take for your child to engage with the other children and to become interested in the morning's activities. Finally when it's time to go offer a big hug and keep positive and matter-of-fact attitude even if your child becomes emotional. Do not get emotional in yourself or project any worry about your child. If your child sees that you're okay then they are more likely to trust that they are okay. You can say something like I know it's hard to say goodbye but I know you're going to have a special time today and I'll be back soon to get you at the end of the day. Even better is to create a morning drop-off ritual that you can repeat day after day. As I've discussed in past videos creating rhythms and rituals is so beneficial for children and parents helping children to feel secure in knowing what comes next. Now I loved this idea from Christina a Waldorf early childhood teacher and the host of the podcast Little Sprigs. She suggests saying something like this to your child when you arrive at school every day. I will hold your hand and walk you to the door. I'll wait until you've taken off your jacket and hung up your backpack then I will give you a big hug and three kisses and after I say goodbye and I'm walking away I will blow you one more kiss. Be sure to catch it and put it in your pocket where it will stay with you all day. Repeating a little script like this daily will give your child so much comfort and confidence but the most important thing is when you leave and after you've blown that last kiss do not turn around again and don't look back. Walk confidently to your car even if you have tears streaming down your face. Don't let your child see them. Over the years of teaching preschool and kindergarten I have seen what happens when a parent lingers in the parking lot or hovers by the door listening for her child's tears. I've seen the anxious look in mom's face wondering if her child is okay and her child may be at the window seeing all this too and getting even more anxious and worried that something is wrong. I know how hard it is to leave your child for the first time and to say goodbye and to cross that major threshold of school but I'm here to assure you that 99 percent of the time once the parent is out of sight the child has stopped crying and is happily playing within five minutes and the other one percent the cases the crying has stopped within 10 minutes. Meanwhile that poor parent having walked away that morning from their crying child has suffered a miserable day worrying about their child all day while the child's been happily playing and making new friends. So happy first day of school and congratulations on reaching this major milestone. I hope this has helped. Thank you so much for tuning in today. I really appreciate the time you took to watch this video all the way to the end. So don't forget to subscribe if you haven't already. If you have a comment or question for me please post it in the comments below and I will do my best to get to it. I may even answer your question in a future video. Thanks everyone. See you again next month. Bye-bye.