How Janina Vela Got YouTube SUCCESS in The Philippines & The Search For Happiness

this is the thing podcast by the juicy blossom hello everyone and welcome back to the through the thing podcast today we're joined by a very special guest who we met a couple of weeks ago Jeanine availa welcome thanks for coming on we're very very excited happy to hear I just said how fresh you look yeah we've been getting not enough sleep recently and we feel very I know kind of drained and then you walk in it's just like nice yeah we need to find like an xbox xbox or playstation ps4 are you so obsessed with video games as a kid yeah you do and then I just totally dropped it I just have no time now but anyway thanks so much for coming on so we're assuming a lot of people are watching listening on the podcast will know who you already youtuber public speaker can we go that far now so can you quickly for people who might not know who you are can just give a brief background summary of your thing okay so I started YouTube five years ago almost I'm celebrating my 50 anniversary in January congratulations thank you I said when I was 15 years old and I'm gladly so like most of my teen years were spent online which is crazy so I've been doing that for a while and then eventually I started singing so I also have some of course I didn't know if we were I didn't if we were mentioning it because last time you said you're working on some stuff but we can mention it yeah so yeah I'm gues singer speaker what else do I do I'm very busy we've learnt this you've got a lot of plate spinning and it's amazing yeah cuz I host on the side as well you know we just gotta get the grind yeah so you started with 15 yeah how how was that what was the YouTube and that was here in Manila yes what was the YouTube scene like when you know it was so different I swear yeah so 2015 when I started will vassalage hadn't even started yet he started six months after me and so then it was probably so you were the first what I wouldn't say that but you don't we'll get the Explorer no he's not he wasn't even a real character then but that was like what youtubers were before and then safety akka Michelle D who were like my absolute idols their makeup gurus and that's kind of all I remember Mikey Bustos who wasn't even based in the Philippines yeah yeah still in Canada so probably we are less than then how many there are now I don't know how I feel like you know that grandma that everybody has to like yes and up so what's your channel did it kick off straight away did you start with smaller numbers and views obviously what subscribers are you on now I think I'm close to 700,000 yeah over half nearly am it coming up for the million gold play button yeah yeah that's amazing so how did it start was a quick growth did was it steady no um well I started like everybody well no I had probably five subscribers when I started it's my mom my dad yeah brother talk and then rubbing my other accounts another and then it took six months for me to reach 500 subscribers and I was posting once a week and then after that I posted twice a week and it took me another six months to reach 5,000 subscribers no and then it took me about three months reach 10,000 after that so it kind of just an old I go yeah a lot of people see that pattern yeah all right and then after the 10,000 mark it shot a hundred thousand because of YouTube FanFest sells the one of the first YouTube FanFest no I think it was a second one that I was joined now see you and part of the pre-show so they came to you they asked you to be well just crazy I was so what did you have to do um so I was on stage with a will and we did seven second challenge you and so we did that on stage I don't even remember what crap we were doing yeah but we were just making me people laugh and it was the most interesting thing because I was 16 Wow and it was the first time that I would see you know the people behind the numbers and so I'm like okay this 10,000 and then when you actually see that thousands of girls and boys were like screaming I was like oh my gosh what's happening like a real life they actually are there yeah did you um so at that point where you met those people it was it like the first meetup you did okay was it like no I I had a meet up but it was very different I had a Christmas Meetup and okay there were 10 15 people yep and I'm actually still friends with a lot of them until now and they have become my friends I'm like I look forward to seeing them every time but yeah that was the first time that I saw like a mass mob of people who yeah the mad feeling isn't it it's yeah that's crazy yeah so fast forward to now yeah when did you get involved with all the other stuff you do was it from YouTube have you come you know how much you uploading now what's what's your YouTube thing at the moment well I'm trying to get back okay so I went through different spirits of posing once a week twice a week and even three times a week but now because I kind of enjoy doing a lot of other things I post once every two weeks okay there's actually a blog coming out today and I'm like yeah we're we're getting back on it because yeah I started hosting and speaking yeah and you find your audience have followed you round to other places I Instagram obviously and stuff oh yeah for sure um I'm very blessed with very loyal subscribers yeah so I think that's what's special about YouTube that you just really have a connection with these people and it's more relationship than their you know my fans and I'm the idol it's yeah hey you know this is like a family way we kind of have us well it feels really personal when we meet people and stuff and even the DMS in the comments and everything it feels really nice it feels I think with the YouTube social media in general you have such the opposite you have a huge opportunity to be way closer with your audience it's not like an actor or something is it when it's no they play a character like you are you people know the real you pros and cons because people want to know your best friend yeah but you know you take the photos with the cons but like I think those are gonna ask you it's gonna ask you something what are you enjoying most at the moment so would you save come away from YouTube on or you're just focusing on other things yeah for a while kind of lost the the drive for YouTube especially because I enjoy like government and politics political work a lot more huh so or a lot more at that time but then now I see a get once again the power of YouTube and I was reminded of it how I can really use the platform through great change so so your content change slightly recently and you're talking about yeah so using it as a platform because you've got the audience you've got the voice you've got things you're passionate about talking about so you did you ever so you're talking about some politics and things going on in the world and the Philippines and stuff right so how how did your audience take that first did you did you tell them that you were gonna know what was your content before makeup yeah exactly that's what I thought so not yes a makeup in DIY so was it just at one point you thought no I'm just gonna make a video about what I want to talk about and be genuine to myself yeah that was basically yet cuz I was I came from a hiatus because I was kind of burned out from baking thing or for making vlogs that I wasn't really passionate about just because I was just following the motions and this is what I'm supposed me they like I'll keep doing it kind of thing you become like a character of yourself oh yeah exactly oh my gosh is how I felt and I had to keep up with that yeah and it was kind of eating me up inside and so um yeah I just decided you know why not earlier this year I posted one about so we had like a water shortage here and actually all over the Philippines and so I did like you know over like a couple nights of research and I put the on there and that was like my first research video how did it go down people were confused she's gonna talk about hug yeah they were confused for sure um but I guess eventually they kind of understood where I was coming from because I've always been as much as I could be I was always genuine about whatever I was talking about yeah and so they figured that if I was generative genuine about makeup last year then I should I'm probably really genuine about whatever I'm talking about now did it feel quite good putting something a bit different on your channel and something that you'd really researched and wanted to talk about for sure it's um it's a different production because I used to do like comedy sketches and that was like a whole different ballgame because so many camera setups and your write a script and the other thing yeah but this one was different you sorry are you want tik-tok no not yet you'd be perfect will be there will be a first follower yeah and I did get a lot of back not a lot but I got a few hater you know couple of backlash jurors because they you know telling me that you're a beauty guru stay in your place or stay in your lane and I'm like I don't care what you relate to say yeah and you're 20 years old like who knows what by 30 what you're gonna be doing I'm not gonna always do the same thing forever so did that knock you back at all you just fully focused on what you believed in well actually a couple of weeks after that I got cancelled on Twitter oh wow really congratulations I'm sold because I did this interview and they cut out a lot of parts you know how the media does it and so based upon yeah they kind of twisted it in a way that basically they misconstrued my words and so I got console.log to it there and of course at that point I just wanted to be like okay I'm really not for this I should just go back to makeup but then I didn't know I was just reminded of what I was fighting for really and it was yeah and so I posted you know do other political videos after that yeah I'm very hard-headed yeah I like that I think that's so important if you listen to one hate comment and change your whole life around that person like they don't know you well enough you have to evolve you have to reinvent yourself I think our vlogs are similar style still to what we've always kind of done by then think about like some of our old videos like we'd never do some of that stuff now really oh no that's fine you grow as a person so your channel kind of goes with you and as long as I think we always talk about the things that are on our mind currently that's why we're doing the podcast I don't think three years ago we would have even thought about doing a podcast with a long-form sit-down it was all about the quick snappy vlogs the short bananas probably someone listening to this walking their dog or in the gym or something and it it's a different I think the audience as your audience grown with you is your audience a similar age to you yeah they've always been kind of a similar age I thought that they were still 15 and then I realized no they were 15 five years ago growing up they're becoming more aware of the world and the things around them anyway so you can be a robot oh I guess can we talk about pressure actually yeah cuz we were having a conversation and there is pressure on YouTube we have this constant battle because there's pressure on YouTube there's we daily vlog for the longest time we still try to we're not we try not blowed every day still but we're not filming every day anymore because we're doing stuff like this we've got admin work you know what it's like emails projects speaking blah blah we have this pressure of trying to do the best very best we can without burning out and then this other almost guilt maybe that's like I'm in a very privileged position I have an audience that I'm incredibly grateful for and if you find yourself moaning and saying I need a day off I need some time away you think the other part of you is like how can you say that like you're living your dream life like do you have that push and pull kind of thing of that wait you just don't need to look after yourself but you also realize kind of how lucky you are how privileged not lucky but you're in a position where a lot of other people might want to be yeah do you feel that yeah for sure um a lot of the times I feel like my emotions are not valid it's like if I'm tired I shouldn't be yeah I know those things um but then something that I realized was that if you know I want to keep doing my job well then I have to recharge it's it's needed because then if I'm empty I can't give out you know it's like how you can't give very good yeah and the quality of what you're creating we better if you are rested and you're feeling good United for a place other than video games what do you base game yeah yeah but I also like fighting so Tekken is always like a favorite angry you know the violence sighs okay uh I think you need to buy a Playstation you can just come and tell us what games to buy I bought you one but your sister has it do we get it back watching it she didn't steal it when we left the UK I said can you look after my ps4 yeah I go around there now it's her and her boyfriend playing it all day is being used yeah the disks all scratched on the side oh never mind so yeah what else do you do to relax what do you I hang out with friends is super important for me because yeah I mean obviously with many people surrounding you all of the time it's it's easy to get lost and to get jammed in that and get drowned in the jinnee novella that I project oh yeah and now that that's not genuine ruined yeah the Brandon's I always say like you got Jenny novella and then you just amplify her times and that's what you see on you do but at times when I need to be like Jenny novella 1 times 7 you know normal people innocent yeah yeah um keeps me normal Cozine so are your friends like youtubers or um no they're not actually well I have some but they started you too yeah I guess part of like the trend of when I was doing YouTube but um but a lot of my friends are not influencers yeah I kind of like it that way yeah how do you talk about your work with your friends and what you do because if it's very different to what they do um actually YouTube is not my entire life so I have other problems of it like a normal person and so that's usually I don't know people think that this is like the whole influence their life just takes over Julie completely but I have boy problems real life stuff yeah realize you know the office I have school and all those things and that's still a big part of my life and so yeah cuz you're working another job yeah which is amazing yeah and that's a you were saying that that is kind of a passion of yours you're passionate about that yeah yeah that's cool it's my Hannah Montana life that's really awesome so you but you still find enough time to play video games you've taught you you manage your time well yeah well I would say yes I'm sure I ended up you know having to learn that you know to make time for you know you make that for what you feel like is important and for a long time I didn't think rest was important because I was like yeah work work work work work yeah but then I realized that I can't produce if I'm not you know singing myself as well so you have felt burnout before oh yeah close close acquaintances yes we we felt the same thing we went very hard for a long time and I think we crashed hard because we went hard for too long that make sense it wasn't like a slow like oh we should take a rest let's take a dare it was like like plummeting to the ground that's what most then what happens with most you stop and we're like we are fine we do not need a day off we will do this every day forever and it's like yeah interesting yeah so what would you say to sorry did you have a question about to speak what would you say some of those people listening people watching on YouTube now who probably have seen your videos in our videos they want to start vlogging or even just getting into something creating some kind of content online but maybe they're afraid or held back have you ever felt self-conscious you come across very confident have you ever had a time grass yeah yeah so yeah have you had a time where you felt less confident about I know speaking in public being front of the camera that kind of thing to have any advice to someone to get past that yeah so I think I shared this in the talk about one of my favorite quotes right now that I keep repeating to myself is that you'll never run out of excuses but you will run out of time and that scares me let's get that printed I kind of drive to you yeah because you know a lot of people come to me and they're like like a frequently asked question would be Janine how do you start and then I'm like well why haven't you started yeah and we can talk for eight hours about you know insecurities and fears and hesitations in doubt yeah and we'll never run out of those but then in the time that you were spending complaining and being hesitant you could have been writing down video ideas you could have been writing scripts you could have been I don't know preparing studying here making a video um and I I'm at a month on living my life without regrets regretting not doing something yeah that's important I think that came up at the top we met Janina at a university recently and there were a lot of questions that were like I'm scared about what people think of me have you started no I'm scared if I don't get any views have you started know and it's like hesitating before you've actually tried it yeah I think that's quite I might comment that's for everything we're not just talking about being a youtuber or being a influencer anything on the do the thing message that the podcast is branded around is do the thing that makes you happy want to go and be a nurse or if you wanna be a teacher or whatever it is I think there's a lot of people doing things and if you notice this as people who do things because maybe their parents wanted them to do it or they thought that would be a good career option because of the money or it would look it looks stable but they're not they have something else in their back of their minds that they have wanted to do and they might enjoy more day to day yeah it seems like you just because you do a lot of different things like makeup and the politics and all that comes up it seems like you do what you want to do yeah yeah I honestly don't know how would that happen I think it's um it was really hard work you know you do was what I wanted to do but then it wasn't you know I didn't make my first hundred dollars still a year after yeah um so it's it's you know to do what you want to do and to do what makes you happy it's not all rainbows and sunshine right away that's exactly what I expect what they want straight away and they don't realize you have to like you go through a process Stefan and enjoy the process to be able to get to the end which for girls what makes it worth it because yeah you stand there and you're like hey I worked for this that's exactly the reason we're making this podcast because it's so easy for us or anyone to put out a nice quote in the rainbow put out a quote on Twitter or something so you do the thing you love someone might look at that and say it was easy for you to say you're doing it that's why we wanted to make this podcast get people like you on other people other guests who have inspiring stories start from zero we weren't we didn't like think oh we want to live in Manila and have a podcast right away that wasn't like yesterday we decided that and now we have it it's like a long very little hard work behind everything yeah there's no success without hard work [Music] let's get your opinion on going back to what I said if someone's parents how have your parents you know because YouTube to that generation same for our parents but you know they didn't grow up with that they didn't grow up the Internet yeah how did they deal with you going online at fifteen and then finding success in finding a big audience have they been supported supportive of that I was very blessed actually with my parents who were kind of supportive in a scary way because they're like well what's the worst that can happen and you can really ask my mom and that's today I thought she might come with events we see her another time yeah I yeah they were saying that you know I you know the Lisa can happen is you end up you know learning how to edit you end up being perseverant you I know way to be diligent that's quite unusual isn't it like it is all about their parents opinions on this kind of thing and it's often like oh they doubted it at first well they weren't happy with it or I had to prove that it's gonna work before they were kind of on board but the fact that they like they have that mindset already it's just amazing space to follow your passion yeah allowed us to discover ourselves because they didn't want us to wait the I don't know till we ran across the road for college or Hill half there ya know you're young and you discover what you want to do but we had no idea it'll become a career yeah but I guess I think what's super I get a lot of that you know a lot of people ask me that then I just say have a conversation with your parents I think a lot of the times it's I think it's Filipino culture that we're like francais no it's done yeah changing here because in the UK in Europe I think it's a little bit different where it it fully has changed yeah and people are almost saying people doing they still respect their parents but I think people are definitely following more what they want to do yeah yeah do you think that's changing here now slowly I always joke that we're 10 years behind a whole other listen country issue so we're we're getting there people are becoming a little bit more I wouldn't say liberal but more free yeah do pursue what they want but yes slowly I always just tell people you know what why don't you just sit down that's it with your parents is that Kay mom so I kind of want to try this thing and just you know explain like a normal person because sometimes we get scared because okay your parents are like this and I'm like this so like we have to be like hello Paul like how are you you actually talk to them like hi mom so this is what I kind of want to do what he's saying yeah and I a lot of you know nice rational conversations a lot of good things come out of those definitely with communication people we need the worst from it but actually it could be okay if you just have a quick safety goes back to the fear anyway of before something's happened yeah come up with all these scenarios in their head so all the what-ifs that could go wrong or something but I guess you don't know until you start someone yeah yeah you mentioned something before it he said something around the lines of um why are you afraid of something that hasn't happened yet what's going on right now with you are you what's your busiest thing what's your main thing at the moment music yeah I I'm just finishing my first single for the next album and we're in the works for the cup yeah the other songs it's gonna be a different genre than what is on Spotify right now but it's a little more rural than we were last night we just want to know about your music do you write with a song I do write oh yeah guys there it's not really a joke because it's true but I only write songs when I'm heartbroken okay that's interesting so it does that happen often does not but when it does it's like I'm who likes a lot of people and then you know it's all shallow it's like one person for like a long time Andy yeah see if you've had boyfriends in the past and actually I'm not nothing official and that's what sucks but I have no regrets yeah yeah but sorry did they did they no because if we always have this thing we were chatting with our previous guests on podcast about this was Vince yes and he was saying that he's sometimes found it hard to get close to girls and things like that because some people just want to meet you yeah cuz they know who you are oh do you have fun she's famous do you have you must have people sliding in the DMS yeah is that phrase you said it like a like a teeth or they cannot like a sliding in you guys six over obviously I it's I think the thing that I hate not hate I just dislike a little bit more than you knowing who I am is you know who I am but pretending that you don't and that's what I hate it's like okay I know that you know what I do but you're like no when your Instagram bio says in any went on my account for us you have so I I would prefer a guy think I'm I was like hey I like your vlogs I think if you work really hard I was like thank you they me I have guys who I've had guys have come up that way and I'm like I appreciate that you're just genuine yeah nice so you seeing anyone now no not but no snow sliding guys that's not invitation I'm sliding right into bear alright we won't say sliding okay moving on quickly back to the music and will you think about guitar did you play guitar I I know basic or cool and like one other chord progression that's not basic but that's the only chord progression that I used for any of my self no it's a nice the four chords yeah I recently got this oh yeah sorry drive drive Lucy crazy playing guitar too loud in the apartment oh my gosh well you're lucky it's a guitar because I have a younger brother who plays drums and my other brother just got a bass let me know when they're free yeah your place not here we hold back I really wanted a drum kit when I was a kid I thought there was a point I told my dad that my mum there was a point where I thought I was getting a drum kit because I'd asked for it and then I heard my dad on the fight it's being someone's like have you got this sorted and I thought that's about my drum cake it's a hundred percent it turns out wasn't but my parents very good with the music like I've played music since I was a kid always loved music always music around the house being played George's dad makes songs as well like as kids it would be like oh we need to have dinner so he'll make a song around having dinner so the kids are excited I was just so like it was like a song he's like the happiest guy in the world yeah there was a song when we woke up in the mornings he just had this song about breakfast and yeah just think mainly for himself I think and he got me piano lessons when I was five because I asked for them as a five-year-old if schools do it here but in schools in the UK there's always a piano in like the assembly hall so you like to sing hymns and things like that there's always a teacher playing the piano so I think I always saw the teacher playing I wanted to play piano and then I taught myself guitar my dad kind of taught me guitar when I was 13 14 and then I was in bands all the way through school and then that's kind of carried on to now so did you is that similar for you did you start music when you were young did songwriting my mom loved musical theater we both love musical theater so she kind of passed that on to me so um I think in my preteens I actually was doing professional musical theater cool which was really random my life yeah it's awesome weird I'm so much twenty no it was weird because at the same time I also had an online business I remember when was this I think I was like 11 12 years old Wow Wow and so that was and also I would go to like the marketplace and buy clothes in wholesale and then put them on Instagram do the shipping and all I live in years old yeah you're a hustler I love that that's a better word than workaholic I'll be good yeah that's amazed that your idea yeah how do you have that idea as an 11 year old I have no idea probably something wrong with me am I really right yeah like people are making money doing that now like there's flipping flipping my sneakers clothing and designer clothing and the whole Supremes then has that do you know if that's hit the Philippines like are there people making money online flipping and stuff like that here yeah yeah there are always nodding a head really awesome so much opportunity online so much quite crazy I don't know how we did anything without thinking about it yeah is online now I was thinking the other day I thought I'm gonna write this into a tweet later most influences sometimes get a bad name of bad reputation some of them do stupid things or there has been some I'm not so sure about here in the Philippines but there's been controversies in the US and the UK and stuff but I think still the fact that someone saw an opportunity with a an app we've built careers on apps like it's crazy and the fact that someone can see not changed with that and build something on it for themselves I don't think I'll always admire that [Music] the boomers I'm not gonna say that yeah [Laughter] I mean we get a lot of flack for being for not wanting to stay in one place for too long or for just moving around so much but I just feel like it comes from us being determined from from being go-getters yeah that's also something that I really admire about this generation it's like okay I don't like my life I'm gonna do something happy an opportunity taken you just be another one take it you do I feel like a lot of people think they by the time they're 25 or 30 or 40 they need to know what they want to do and have everything figured out and that's it until they retire yep if you try something out don't worry Gary Vee say if you try something out over four years try eight different things one new thing each six months you have eight things out yeah then only four years your life and it's like and even having a chat yesterday and we were we were I talked about happiness and following happiness and what actually is happiness we kind of came to the conclusion this was at 2:00 a.m. in bed just black and we were like we work till midnight editing was a weird space I poured my last coffee last night at like 11:00 p.m. made food and yeah so we were having this weird conversation about happiness because that's kind of thing we do and yeah we came to the conclusion that it's it's actually in the small moments like we didn't even know if there was everything else in your head bear with me because it is gonna get a little bit everything else in your head is like a thought right but you only really have the present moment so you might be you might be thinking about a setting that happened or something that might happen so like future and past but what we really have is right now yeah and that's happiness but you're not necessarily dislike happy at the time and all day or like for a whole hour aware for it might be that a specific moment that's happened in the day is happy because I think there's a lot of people online saying be happy follow your dreams follow your happiness and stuff like that and then we people might think well surely you're not happy all the time yeah a hundred percent so I think we want we want to delve down more into it deeply on the podcast we were saying like the happiness really is in the small moments when you walk through the door and we're happy to see you and we smile and we hug and then when we I don't know when we go and get coffee and the person holds the door for say good morning and small things add up to make you feel happy yeah general but he's actually the small moments yeah all in the problem man do you have like down days well we took a turn are you really sad yeah I just want to make sure the podcast is relatable yes we don't want to put across the message that you know that's anything unrealistic yeah for sure um I read a quote I forgot what what exactly it was yeah but it said a healthy life isn't like a completely happy life and I think that's true because we're human and happy is not the only emotion that we're given and I feel like you know people think that sadness or even anger is always bad but I don't think so I feel like we're made to feel all of these things as long as we don't respond to them like in a bad way but I like to cry and I think crying is good for you something out yeah um there's a my therapist told me she said there's no such thing as an unreleased emotion because emotions will eventually come out okay and it's either you decide to let them out or they'll come out in their own way when you don't want them yeah yeah so I'd rather you know cry in a safe space and then just you know wake up and then move on yeah noise so I do have dawn days and they're not as simple as how I explained it yeah they're they're genuinely down days but you know with I guess it's just how you know wheels you know you're on a wheel you you're on the top and then sometimes you're Donna but you always go back up and I think feeling down days makes you also appreciate the good days more and ups and down like without having a contrast of different feelings you're you'll just feel the same constantly and you won't and appreciate things and yeah it allows for more to go in in your head yeah interested that you said you see a therapist yes we were thinking about it or talking about it because I think that in the past has been a stigma that there has to be a problem for you to see a therapist but then I someone said something like well you go to the gym for your body you work out you exercise for your body so seeing a therapist is just like the same thing for your mind yeah is that how you feel about that makes yeah I mean prevention is better than the cure yeah a cure so I well unfortunately I didn't really have that choice of doing the preventive measures when I saw a therapist because I actually went there you're being diagnosed with anxiety depression stuff like that so I was i I went to therapy last year for about six months but it's great I mean obviously at that time I didn't think but it was great but then I wou understand yourself so much better and because I was able to to kind of pick apart who I was now I kind of understand where am I from when I overact this way why am i responding like this oh it's because of this thing so you get it all makes more sense put pieces together and understand your emotion so you think it's because you're talking to someone that doesn't like know everything about you and how it's someone new it's not speaking to a family member or a friend it was speaking to someone that's like a blank slate unbiased and she tell you like okay so it's have you ever thought of this connecting connecting you sit together and you're like you're right is that a regular thing still you see that person not I I stopped earlier this year but then I went the therapy again last night so yeah it's it's I I would suggest has you know people to go yeah I've only heard great things from people you guys yeah I hate there yeah never going I don't think there should be a stigma around there you know it shouldn't be anything to be ashamed of for sure or worried about which we're working on because there is still that stigma yeah you're crazy yeah yeah yeah how do you get around that have you told friend you obviously speaking about it publicly so yeah I I've kind of worked my way in to be open about what I'm going through and you know lucky enough I'm like 90% have all AB in support but of course is that then percent that you're just overreacting it's like you're so emotional you know that that's that makes them feel better if yeah there's a lot of insecure people who they want to tell you that you're overreacting because it makes them feel better because then they don't have to deal with you the 90% there are supportive it could be that 5% of that 90% we're feeling the same way because someone that they look up to is going through that too and they've gone down the therapy rate they might think I'll do that too and then because you've got like this influence on them they all you you've helped so many people in being open and honest about it so kind of opening up helps other people as well I think a lot of people hide it and keep it buried try keep it buried do you how about hate online and trolls and stuff like do you get much of that I used to people used to hate on my appearance all the time really yeah I mean really because I was I cuz Filipinos love talking about weight noticed yeah they love I don't know why they love that but it's their passion so it makes them happy do you think guys all be their hobby so I had to deal with a lot of echoes of when I started five years ago I was thick thin and then I discovered food very good a lot of my friends are guys and I live with three brothers and so everybody eats yeah yeah yeah and so they would mention that and I just I'm you know an influencer but I don't look like the celebrities here so yeah it's a lot of physical stuff but then I always say that what haters say about you says more about them again it actually seems about you really um so it kind that that thought kind of helps me have compassion for them it's like oh wow what dark place do you think that they're in that they would have to say that about a stranger and then that would kind of soften my heart throw it to them and not because I also don't want to end up hateful yeah you don't want to be the same and do you respond or deep delete just leave it I just leave it yeah it's still I mean as much as you know I wanna I want you or the internet to be like a positive space we're so human and it's still a free space yeah I don't sugarcoat it yeah so I I just let them be but also like Kim Kardashian said something and she said it was along the lines of why would I let somebody's comment take up like 24 hours of my day where they just took you know 30 seconds to write it wow that's powerful yeah so I want you to just write out like 20 quotes 10 bucks I want you to write back when you started be just full of quite you see full of quotes we love quite there was another one that I think I'll keep smack garyvee but another one he said about haters they're not gonna be like at your death they're not going to be at your kids birthday parties they're not yeah exactly and like why would you care about someone like that if they don't actually actually care about you if they're strangers exactly you know most of the time they follow all your accounts yeah they respond to everything you do they watch your videos right to the end because they comment about something that happened 19 minutes yeah are they really your biggest fans and then you find that the your other fans and subscribers will reply to their comments of hate and like back you up and kind of do it for you community takes care of it I'm really really proud of my Bella fam which subscribers because they never respond in hate and I I'm just proud that we've really caught yeah so 2020 new decade coming up yeah that's cool you've always had like so ten years ago you were 10 years old yeah I was 16 I was 12 yeah no 13 there's my birthday yesterday so you've had a kind of crazy 10 years your online business at 11 you got into YouTube when you're 15 you now do all this other stuff what is the next I'm not gonna ask you what the next 10 years are doing but the next year what do you have coming up what do you want to do next year have you got any goals aspiration you I want to start this project it's called the daring movement and it I it's gonna be I want it to be like a like an organization or a community of people it's more of it's for empowerment in the sense that I feel like everybody has good in them and everybody wants to do something but a lot of people just don't know how and so with this I kind of wanna you know just get different events organizations things that you can do to actually help save the world so you know or nice tree plantings charity stuff going to foundations and all those things so it's I with my youtube like research videos I kind of want it to be I'm kind of taking away all of everybody's excuses did not be aware of current affairs yeah um where and this and this movement I wanted to be taking away people's excuses to not do something or I cannot get up to be an ignorant or complacent yeah you're not a lot because I'm literally handing yeah yeah yeah I want to do this how do I do it like what kind of things so I'm like for Christmas we want to do visit things like we want to do feeding programs like that next year I really wanted to do a tree planting cool and like a cleanup kind of stuff that's awesome if you need help with that yeah we've got a smaller audience than you but we're really want to get on board with some stuff like that actually you mentioned like small audience for me so my views have gone down for sure because I'm not doing trendy videos anymore but I find that the the lives that are changed or the depth of the change is a lot deeper than you know spread out because before I would get let's say a thousand comments saying oh you're so pretty or oh I like this video but then now I get 200 comments of wow this really you know encouraged me a paragraph small meaningful more impactful yeah and at the end of the day that kind of makes me feel more proud of my content yeah because then I'm not just part of somebody seven minutes of their day I'm part of their lives now yeah so totally admire that I'm relate to that actually as we're doing it differently but with we found that with our vlogs it's nice people watching for entertainment and stuff and seeing where we're traveling and what we're up to and stuff that's really cool but that's why we wanted to start talking about more topics that we're interested in that's why we're doing the podcast to give a bit more value make it a little bit more meaningful so I totally understand that yeah genuinely we want to help out with that that sounds cool let us know let us know if we can do anything oh my god shall we do the Quickfire so at the end of every podcast we do like a little quick fire round just like ten questions very basic stuff but this is where the audience can really get to know you I was chill and then now I'm kind of scared you're all that stuff now the sweat beads are coming up okay you ready it comes to herd cattle dog dog sunrise or sunset cookie or donut fire come on I'm cookie okay it's like torture I feel really bad now favorite day of the week Friday city or island island bath or shower shower coffee or tea coffee Instagram or Twitter and then last one Netflix or YouTube I guess I can't not say yeah before we wrap up and you could document do you watch documentaries no I don't only yeah I feel like you would what should I feel like you're a documentary person no I I spend my time watching the news yeah gives you information we've recently tried to start watching more documentaries yeah and some of them are even on Netflix some of them were so well put together yeah you learn about stuff you never knew what's it called there's like four episodes 15 minute episodes and it like explores explained explained yeah just got Netflix it called explain and it's like real index and the things about like memory or about sleep or about oh right I watch things in it's like like in 15 minute documentary really good recommender random not space like then cannot mention it actually our documentary really great yeah what a make it documentary one day oh that's another project for the future Rory's already shaking head like well thanks so much for coming on really great to have you around if anyone wants to find your music or your YouTube or Instagram do and just want to say your channel names and things it's confined to you journey novella everywhere so called Instagram Facebook YouTube Spotify awesome Friendster tik-tok that's a big day yeah we're excited for that right cool thanks so much [Music] you [Music]