This Is Ridiculous and Needs To Stop!

[Music] brought to you by the every dooll app start budgeting for free today all right today's question comes from Abigail in West Virginia Abigail writes my in-laws are too much to deal with specifically my mother-in-law Abigail she knows you wrote this she I don't know how mother-in-laws know they just know she has to stick her nose into everything she has a key to our house which was bought by my husband before we got married she's folded our laundry cleaned our house and moved stuff while we were not at home oh man I've asked my husband to talk to her but he told me he couldn't do it and told me to chill out you don't have a mother-in-law problem you have a husband problem you have a husband problem he a w God Almighty that makes me so uncomfortable to think my mom would come over to our house my mom's amazing but my mom would come over and go through our unsolicited go through our stuff without your permission and even more uncomfortable as my wife said I need this to not happen again and I said I can't do it I can't do it I'm scared of my mommy oh my gosh Abigail you have a husband problem he needs to run down to Walmart on aisle 3 and Pick up a backbone yeah and some Pampers while he's there cuz he might te in his pants while he talks to Mommy y'all need to have this I mean this this is a yeah sorry sorry sorry sorry this is awful uh mother-in-law is going to do what here's the deal I think if and maybe she's controlling I'm going to give her the benefit of the doubt I think mother-in-law is trying to love her little baby the best she knows how she's trying to be helpful and she's screwed up yes and she doesn't think you're loving him the say the right way but she's not going to say anything she's just going to keep doing it and I think your cute little hubby is a gigantic 14-year-old and he needs to grow up real real quick yeah so um if you say a thing you start a 10e feud you can't say a thing the only thing you can do is encourage your husband to get have a backbone and um this is out of line the boundaries are There's No Boundaries here this is ridiculous and it needs to stop yesterday um tell him you want the locks changed and you want him to talk call his mother and tell her to not come in your home without clearing it with both of you first that you're a married couple and this is weird and she shouldn't be doing this Mom we love you thank you for the help you can't do this anymore I've changed the locks your key is not good anymore and you don't need to come in our home anymore it's a real short calm conversation and he needs to man up and do that if he cannot do that you do not have a mother-in-law problem you have a husband problem and you'll need to sit down with a marriage counselor correct and by the way to husband listening to this you don't call your mom and say my wife doesn't want you coming in the house to anymore you goober you be a grownup and you say I I messed up leave and cleave that's right leave your mother and father we need to figure out how to do these things on our own to your spouse golly dude and mother-in-laws don't break into your kids homes and do their laundry for them unless unless there's like a crisis or a newborn and they've asked for your help don't do that even if there's a newborn and they ask for your help you still ask permission yes of course but I mean that's if you been invited show with a key that you had before they were married so one of the best practical jokes we ever played was a key have youever heard this one no I had a personal assistant 25 years ago beautiful Christian lady and she got engaged MH so for her engagement party all the guys we took her to an ice hockey game in Nashville and the um the announcer at the hockey game was a friend of mine and so uh one of the guys in the office that was with us was about 10 guys went all through out the whole section and handed every guy a key went to the hardware store and got keys and the announcer said uh Sheree is getting married next week anyone that has a key to her apartment needs to bring it to her and like 500 guys got up and started bringing keys to her it was so it was such a wonderful practical joke but yeah that's that's much better than this [Laughter] one oh this just makes me sad yeah this is bad yeah so and can I tell you this one thing so one time um a friend of mine they were having some family stuff and uh it was a a couple friend of me and my wife's and we've known him forever and never never and they were going through some like just somebody passed away or something and I said hey let's get them a house cleaner just to come in and clean up and my wife looked at me and said are you crazy so what do you mean she said you know what that would feel like to me if somebody came over to see us and then they hired someone to come clean my house oh it would be like an insult it would be an insult and so I got to say mom coming over to clean the house and do the laundry is a little bit of a flex oh right it's a little bit of a flex and so it's like cooking the lasagna it's like the recipe you got for lasagna my Las in the way he deserves to be taken care of I'll I'll come over and help it kind of feels like Ry Romano's Mom it's like it's like your underwear was folded wrong that's yes I I'm sorry honey I'll I'll do it for you yeah and so husband grow up mother-in-law Flex this whole thing makes me feel uncomfortable Dave I never feel uncomfortable this one does this is like it's got It's got a little stalker esque it does man she's got a key and she sneaks in like Keebler's elves or something and cooks and does the laundry no cuz this kind of motherinlaw leaves a note that says hey I noticed things were messy so I cleaned up and I vacuumed you'll have a great night and it's just like a little a total flex but if you say anything it's like oh oh I was just trying to help I'm so sorry I I won't help anymore yeah right Marty out the mar out Mar out she'll definitely the old uh oh okay um there's some there's some old Dairy Queen napkins in the glove box I'll just eat those y'all just go eat wherever you want to um I'll just eat the old kleenexes um and I'll just sit in the car and be cold and when y'all get done yall just come out it's that hey I did run into a ga day that's opening a new food truck called wherever you want to go that's the when everybody asks where they want to eat it's wherever you want to go where you want to go okay we're heading we'll go right there there used to be a great little honky Tong in lovec Texas called the library we' be like where you going going to the library all right good The Honky Tonk going to the library love it all right boys and girls boundaries are necessary uh and I will admit um that the hardest stage of parenting for me has been uh parenting children who are no longer in my control it is the hardest stage to stay out of other people's business that are grown-ups even if they are from my flesh and blood and um so that does not matter uh and I I I don't have any major issues it's not like any of them are doing anything extremely stupid or something but still just not telling grownup people what they have to do with your dad voice it it requires a little bit of discipline yeah um e even today my son is studying for his first round of high school finals he's a freshman and I I know the science of studying I know the pedagogy of studying I have been a high school and a college teacher for my whole career and he's got to go through this first round of finals studying the way his he rolls his eyes says Dad I know okay and right and it's hard because I want to go in there and say this is the way he's got to learn this time and then next time we'll be able to speak from a place of all right all right I need some help yeah Dad show me how to right and it's hard it's hard when you're when the your precious little Johnny's underwear isn't folded right mother-in it's Abigail's husband now Abigail back up back up Abigail be cool be cool man she has to stick her nose into everything it's the move stuff while we weren't home that one's weird yeah the came back the furniture's rearranged it's kind of like misery yeah that's what I'm think it's got a stalker esque thing to it the penguin always faces North create your free every dooll budget today the simplest way to budget for your life