Bị hiểu nhầm từ lúc nhỏ, lớn lên trở thành xã hội đen – Tập 11 | Khóa học dành cho cha mẹ #daycontai

We talked about this before. If adults don't pay attention, it can cause a sense of insecurity for children. Even a small thing like breastfeeding can break your logic about a beautiful world. But why does Ms. Tran value this sense of insecurity? What impact does this sense of insecurity have on the lives of children? It has a long-term impact. For example? For example, I once received a call from the hospital about a very difficult case. The hospital really couldn't help the child. So they introduced me. I talked to the hospital. The story was like this. There was a mother who found out that her child was very easy to lie to. Lying? That's right. A child is very good at lying. That's the first thing. The second thing is that the child's values are distorted. The child thinks that the child doesn't need to study anymore. The child only needs to earn money. The child can go to work that the adult has just heard is terrible. That is, this value has existed in the child's mind. Then the mother felt very difficult to educate the child, as well as not knowing how to adjust. Because this child was a patient of a hospital, so when the mother made a request, the hospital brought it to the social welfare unit. But when the social welfare unit came, they found out that this was a humiliating problem. This is a comprehensive problem of medical treatment, social situation and education. Because this child is about to go to school, the family came to me. Then I said that I would do my best. But I gave some conditions. The first is that I have to visit the child's house. The second condition is that I have to go to the school to discuss with the teacher. The third is that I have to meet the child's father. Find her father? This is a girl and she wants to meet her father. Because at that time, this father was being prosecuted. He is not at home. So I suggest that meeting the child's father is not an easy thing to do. However, I have a long-standing experience and the wisdom of the precepts. We have proven a rule. It is your heart that always needs to go towards that goal. Never give up. And what you want to do is to help others. Then it will be successful. She said that this made me think of a sentence. That is faith. You don't just think about it, you have to do it. That's right. There was a book called Secrets. It also mentioned similar rules. Then I started to give some instructions to this family. At that time, the father was running away, so I couldn't meet him. That's right. Then he often appeared with anxiety. Sometimes he came home in the middle of the night or a little late. And took his only daughter out to eat a delicious meal. Because the father wanted to make up for his daughter. The next morning, he left again. Yes. So the mother said that she was very difficult to educate this child. Because the day before, the three children took the girl to eat a meal that cost 3,000 TWD. The next morning, I gave the girl 30 TWD to go to breakfast. The girl said, yesterday I ate 3,000 TWD that time. Today I give you 30 TWD, how do you eat? So this made the mother very painful. I continued to help this family. One day I called to find the mother. But I didn't expect that the father was at home. The receiver was the girl's father. I introduced myself. I believe that the father also felt my sincerity. Because I did a lot of things that I shouldn't have done. I not only help his daughter with the lessons in class. But also use my resources to invite my students to help the whole school. And the whole area where the girl lives. So this father felt my sincerity. He told me that he was the father of the girl. I said, I have something to contact your wife. He said, she is not at home now. But Ms. Tran, can you give me 5 minutes? At that time, he was allowed to temporarily not pursue the case. But still have to participate in psychotherapy. Those are some of the classes that have been paid by the government. But he could go for 1 or 2 days without participating. So that class was not effective. Why? In that phone call, he told me the reason. He said, why are you on the road like this today? Why did the father go on the road like that? He is an adult. We are solving the problem of his daughter. Now talk about the reason why he went on the criminal road. He said, because when he was very young. He often had to live in an unsafe environment. What's wrong with his family? When he was young, he was often laughed at, misunderstood. Do you know, there are some smart children, adults can't understand their behavior. But adults take their standards to violate children. Even making fun of children. For example? For example, when going to class, children can ask questions that teachers cannot answer. Or a strange idea with classmates. It can say that it's not like this, but like that. Some teachers can't accept such students. They don't like such students. They really don't like and feel that this child is causing trouble. From there, in the teacher's words, or in the eyes, there is discrimination against these students. These students really have independent thinking, have self-respect and are smart. The father said that he could not stand it, but once this father wrote a divorce letter, and I read that letter. I told her that I was the best university student in Taiwan, but I realized that my writing was not as good as him. His words and behavior in that divorce letter were not normal. Although he is not good at middle school? That's right, although he is not good at middle school. So his talent is very good? That's right. But because of that insecurity, he went down the wrong path. That's right, then he dropped out of school. Because there he was not accepted, not understood and not understood. So he often skipped school and fought. When he skipped school, where did people usually go? He was often led by a group of people or said something negative. That is the black society. He turned to this path. Then he stayed where he was accepted and considered to have found his stage. On that stage, he can develop his own ability. If others can't do it, he can do it. Let's see if he will slowly become a boss. He has no way back. That caused a great pain for the family. That insecurity came from the time he was in middle school. Maybe even since he was younger because he was a very smart child. We also found that the smarter children will remember very clearly the bad times. Ah, so that's why you said the kind of student who skipped school. Especially male students are very typical. On the one hand, it's like fighting with the teacher. On the other hand, there may be a feeling of insecurity, anxiety, and self-doubt that adults can't recognize. We can see that the kind of young man who has no strength in his hands. That's right. His insecurity comes from the feeling that he has no place to belong to. He always feels like he doesn't belong to that group. He always feels like he doesn't belong to this family. His feelings are overflowing and turbulent. So I don't encourage adults to think of every way to protect their children. There's a saying, fear of being discouraged. It's really because of the fear of being discouraged. That's right. This has a bad effect on the child's body. Because of the fear of being discouraged, the liver will be damaged. When the liver is damaged, the function of the liver will not be favorable. The liver has a very important function, which is to digest fatty acids. When fatty acids are not digested, it will be easily irritated. When we eat vegetables without fat, it will be very difficult to eat, especially for children. So for children who are addicted to food, you can give them a little oil, even pizza. But if the child is often intimidated, this fatty acid will be irritated and not be digested. So the child's feelings will not be good. The child doesn't know what's going on, and the adult doesn't know. In such an insecure situation, if there is a lot of misunderstanding, it will make the child's feelings worse and worse. So if your child is often in an easy-to-break state, your parents should come to you for guidance. That anxiety can have a big impact on the life of the child in the future. Every time you tell a story, from a very young age, I often think, is it that serious? Even if the child is intimidated, he will recover by himself. Is this not the case for this child? Not exactly. Some children will recover by themselves, but some children will hide, and some will overcome this difficult situation. This is why I say that school is very important for parents to help us become parents with wisdom, with methods. Are there any children who are not hurt? Tell me which children are not hurt. There will definitely be in the process of growing up. But children will be fine if they receive support from the environment, be motivated, be guided. The child can turn past injuries into learning wisdom. Children like that are very good, very confident, and not afraid of challenges. This is very important for their whole lives. So, starting now, young parents need to learn the method of wisdom to educate their children. Ms. Tran just reminded us that when taking care of a child, the child's cheeks should not be raised. Are there any other movements that make the child uneasy? I feel that one very important thing is that when a child is hungry, they will cry. Some children have very good lungs. They will cry so loudly that you can't stand it. Children have the ability to cry loudly. That's right. I used to study the development of science. Ms. Tran is a senior teacher who told me an interesting story. She just gave birth, so she has a lot of experience that she herself has experienced and a lot of knowledge in the field that she studies. I remember the first day of class, the teacher gave a big book. The book was a picture of a very cute baby. She gave this book to all the students in the class. Then she said, if you think that children will be like that, raise your hand. Those who raise their hands are those who have never raised a child. If you have raised a child, you will know. Then you will know that children will not be like that. OK, I feel that she is a good teacher, so she did this. She first broke your thoughts. That's right. First, she broke your thoughts because when your thoughts are broken, we realize that we lack knowledge. We still have to learn a lot. I think she is a very good teacher. Second, she is also a teacher who teaches children naturally. Do you know that her age is already old but she still persists for her son. This is a very good example. In addition, during this process, she also teaches us courage. What is courage? Courage is when you know what you want to do. When you are a mother, you have to be honest in this life. This kindness will come from your heart. That's what no matter how much money you spend, you can't buy and no one can manipulate. That kindness makes you want to do the most. When you find this, you just need a little more skill and you will become a very good mother. We will leave this issue for our audience to think a little bit. What do you want to do in your life? You add a little skill and then you will become a good parent. Thank you for watching our film. Please pay attention to the safety of children because this will affect their whole lives. Goodbye and see you in the next episode.