Guy Ritchie's 'The Covenant' Movie Review: An Afghan Hero's Tale

Because all the dialogue and everything was typical war movie and it was all that like, you know, hey snake bring around the big one Yeah, it's like, you know, you know, yeah, we're gonna sell the sizzle not the steak or something Yeah, I was just scrolling Amazon and I saw Jake Gyllenhaal and I was like, I'm in And these people are just being killed for no reason like lunatic guys and pickup trucks would come flying into the village Shoot a whole bunch of people. Yeah, and just take off and like yeah, no benefit Hello, and welcome to the real generation gap. My name is Shane Schildmeier and I'm Fred Sottoli and today We are reviewing Guy Ritchie's the Covenant and I just can't get over the fact that he put his name in the title You know Richie's the Covenant. I thought I was reading it wrong at first I was like, oh, it's the Covenant and then I was like, no, that's the title, right? Which is kind of a douchey thing to do. Well, I thought so too You don't see Steven Spielberg's Schindler's List. No, it's just Schindler's List. It's just Schindler's List Yeah, that was a pretty weird thing very weird And the funny part of it is this is the most non Guy Ritchie movie and Guy Ritchie exactly It was a very weird thing to do and he hasn't I maybe if he does it with all his movies, you know Guy Ritchie's snatch Guy Ritchie's whatever but no, this is the first movie he's done and done that he's done this and It'd be like the Beatles. Hey, Jude. Yeah, exactly Doesn't work super weird. It doesn't work. So Guy Ritchie's the Covenant Fred. What were your initial thoughts on this movie? Well, the movie takes place in Afghanistan in 2018. Mm-hmm And what I thought I love war movies and you know that yeah, me too. Yeah, but The movies that take place in the Middle East now, they all seem to be focused on PTSD Mm-hmm, and that's not really a war movie thing It's a whole nother genre like and it seems that it's a real big issue now where it used to just be the battle you know, so I was Anticipating the PTSD thing and there was a lot of PTSD stuff in it He had tremendous angst when he came home. Yeah, but it was a different kind of angst Yeah, he had angst because he had to fulfill the Covenant. He didn't have like horrible memories He was full of horrible memories, but that wasn't what was driving this story Yeah, and that's why I really liked it and I appreciated that. Okay. Yeah, my initial thoughts were I just threw on a movie in the background. I was hanging out and I love war movies and I love Jake Gyllenhaal like man, if I That's my man crush right there Jake Gyllenhaal right there. Well, he'd had that one movie where he was kind of crushy. Oh, yeah Actually never seen that movie broke you're talking about Brokeback Mountain. Yeah, I've never seen it But uh, I do love me some Jake Gyllenhaal. Um, do you have a man crush? Huh? Man crush actor? No, you don't do that. No generations, uh, but I was See that in common ground that Jason Momoa found his feminine side. Okay, okay But yeah, so I was like Jake Gyllenhaal. I'll throw this movie on Love war movies me and my roommate were just kicking it watching it It was okay to me, you know, I love a good war movie this just didn't touch me it felt like it was a Like fast-paced not a lot really happening. I don't know. It wasn't it for me. What really surprised me was Ahmed Dora Salim. Mm-hmm. He stole the show. Yeah, it was the guy. Yeah that now Both of the both of the principals it was like Jackie Gleason and Ed Norton and the Honeymooners I mean both of them just worked together so strong. Mm-hmm and He really He was one of those actors where you don't believe he's acting. Yeah. Yeah. No, I agree with that He was like a real guy doing a real thing in a real place. I didn't see any acting Yeah, and that's how good an actor he was I was really impressed with him and the writers that made that character. Mm-hmm. They really created a fantastic This is one of those like writer and director and actor like it must have really come together I didn't think he was that deep of writing. I thought the writing was and it was a very predictable But it was like it was cool. Well, let's it's true In fact, I put a thing in my notes the only real writing in the movie like where there was like a philosophical moment Mm-hmm, John Kenley. Mm-hmm He confronts a colonel and this is a bureaucracy moment and he says he had saved the colonels life in another battle Yeah, so he says yeah that that was like the best writing and right for me I like that. I like that. I have a hook in me. Do you think I have a choice? He wants to go rescue his friend. He says I saved your life You know, you're the kind of man who pays his debt pay your debt. Mm-hmm. So his his debt to him Was to help him. Yeah, save a bed. So basically it's like the story of I have to trust this guy the Jake Gyllenhaal said trust the interpreter and But he doesn't trust him at first and then he ends up saving his life a few times And then the end is Jake Gyllenhaal gonna save his life, you know It's kind of like that's that's the story real and do or die. I did like the aspect there was no love romance There was no love story. There was no, you know romantic plot It was just kind of I don't say a bromance but just like a bro story kind of But way brothers of war brothers of war, right? And I did like the kind of trust that a soldier has to have in another soldier Yeah, you have to depend on that guy He has to depend on you your life depends on it and it was a very dramatic movie that way Yeah, it was so hopeless at so many points. He's how are they ever gonna get away with this or get through this? I mean he dragged the man like a hundred miles through the desert and I feel like a lot of I Want to say post 9-eleven Iraq Afghanistan war movies a lot of them are like, you know America where there's showing freedom We're there for freedom and I feel like this kind of stepped away from that I don't say it was against that but I feel like if focus more on like the the turmoil of what was going on there and how things were rough for the Interpreters and how they were kind of in the middle of you know, both sides. Well, that's what in my internet introduction I said the capriciousness and that these people are just being killed for no reason like lunatic guys and pickup trucks would come flying into The village shoot a whole bunch of people. Yeah, and just take off and like no benefit Mm-hmm, and the people they were shooting were like totally impoverished poor people. Yeah, like you're having a terrible day. Anyway Now you're dodging bullets. Yeah. Yeah, so unfair so unreasonable, you know, yeah, and that's it's That horror. Mm-hmm. It's one thing to be in the combat shooting. It's another thing to be living there while people are having the combat you're trying to raise your kids or you have a goat you're trying to you know, and Really really terrible. What did you think about the combat scenes and like let's compare it to like, you know Save a prior saving private Ryan or any other well movie Okay, the combat scenes are always great in all these movies. Yeah, people really know how to do this Yeah, and this yeah, there you go. Yeah Most civilians don't even understand these arms You know, it's just not like a regular ranch rifle. Mm-hmm Like these things high-capacity armor-piercing people don't know difference between a rifle and a cannon Okay, like there's a thing where a bullet goes through you. There's another thing where the bullet explodes when it hits you yeah, so yeah, the the all the scenes there were a lot of combat scenes and Roadside bomb stuff really unfair people far away You know raining down you don't know where it's coming from Yeah, and then you have surveillance from above satellites are telling you what to do and airplanes are going by There was a scene like that in here, right? Yeah, that was cool. It's like two miles ahead. There's a trap That was cool. And then it's not like don't go in the trap It's like going and destroy the trap like you have to fight it and just so terrible. Yeah terrible war is always terrible, right? anyway, I Philosophy is important to me and integrity is important to me and that they produced a movie Guy Ritchie Yeah that they that they produced a movie that was all about Integrity. Yeah, it was I have to do what I have to do. I have a debt that I have to pay I can't sleep until I do this and he Jake Gyllenhaal really portrayed that not sleeping. Yeah, he was And even his wife said look you're useless to me like this. You go do what you got to do Yeah, I think back. He's in America. We got only escape. He's really good. Everything's fine. He's got to go back Yeah I think we have a picture if Luke wants to pull it up where it shows him like on his first call trying to get Over there and like the second call and then he keeps trying to call and figure out how to get over there Well, that was the next thing in the movie that really made that really there it is. Yeah, and it starts drinking. Yeah, right Yeah, he he is the fact that he has to deal with the bureaucracy So he goes to the to the soldiers and he says look I have to rescue this guy He saved my life. He and his wife and child are in danger that Because they helped us. Yeah, because they helped us Yeah, the guy could have just been like a regular Arab and but in the desert nobody would know anything But because he helped the Americans now he was in trouble. They're like we can't let him down They're like, oh, well, we don't have funding for that and you know, it's not on the schedule And you're talking about a lot of equipment. There's logistics. He's like, I don't care about any of that Yeah, I'll go there by myself Do you do you think that's realistic you come from a military family, right? Do you think that's realistic that? That they would send someone back by themselves to go save a civilian there or an interpreter there No, that would be a this is a very extreme situation. Yeah, you usually you have a chain of command Yeah, and that's it. That's it. So it was the drama of him overcoming the bureaucracy first He had to overcome being wounded then he had to overcome being rescued then he had to overcome all these things and When he was at home in his beautiful home Which interestingly enough was in a desert here. Yeah, I thought that was kind of almost cruel. But anyway, he He then had to overcome the bureaucracy and I find that in our own lives now We are confronted with this even at the civilian level, you know, so well if you need medical care you go there They schedule your appointment for four months later. Yeah, then a week before the appointment they cancel the appointment So you show up on time for your you show up early for your appointment and you don't get seen for like five hours late Yeah, that's yeah The medical people will call you two days before don't forget your appointment the day before don't forget your point your appointments in an hour You're getting text you're getting stuff and everything like that. And then you show up. Yeah, wait an hour and a half. Yeah So he but but that's I'm whining about small potatoes. This guy had to rescue a family after being torn up him himself in the most hot war zone You could possibly imagine where you can't identify the enemy you go in the town. Everybody looks the same Yeah You don't know if the guy sleeping there is gonna pull a gun on you in ten seconds or a baby is gonna be holding A bomb or whatever it is. So it's so hazardous so dangerous. Mm-hmm, and he's he's got to do it Yeah, so it's a movie about integrity and honor and I like that. I like that a lot, too I like that a lot, too. I think The movie was lacking something for me. I can't I don't know what it is. I just wasn't super in it I don't know. Huh? Yeah, I maybe the pace was a little too fast for me I don't know, but it just wasn't it for me. You thought the pace was too fast. I'm thinking maybe that's it I don't know. I really don't know but for me it was just kind of like a movie Okay, I could do with it I could do without it fair. Well, it's not the great epic of all time Yeah, nothing like that. It's not gonna go down in history or anything. Yeah, but I didn't find any flaws with it Okay, so I I feel like Because because all the dialogue and everything was typical war movie. Yeah, I want to say there wasn't much dialogue No, and it was all that like, you know, hey snake bring around the big one Yeah, it was like, you know, you know, yeah, we're gonna sell the sizzle not the steak or something Like okay fine fine It's a bunch of cliches and you know all soldier cliches and once again could be written by AI and again I feel like this was it was super different from a typical Guy Ritchie movie I feel like dialogue is pretty heavy for him or he plays with dialogue pretty frequently well, I Agree with that because Guy Ritchie movies are all over the place kind of and this was just a chronological day one day two Day three day four you marched right to the very end of the movie. There was no foreshadowing. There was no flashbacks No, I mean he had a couple of nightmares here and there but yeah, that's to be expected but anyway, I I've kind of felt like I'll give it an eight. You're giving an eight. Yeah Yeah, I didn't think it was the great of all time. You know, it wasn't it wasn't the Godfather great though But it was one. I would watch it again. Okay, and I would recommend it. Okay, so that's a recommendation Everybody whatever, you know, I on the other hand and go see Guy Ritchie's the Covenant. She's the Covenant I'm giving it a five point five. Oh, I was gonna go five, but then I'll give it a point five point five because I was entertained So I needed to lean a little bit more towards, you know, the good side But it was just I was super neutral about it could have done without it could have you know, I enjoyed it It exceeded my expectations did it that's why I bumped the right was like at the end It was like boy that was that was pretty darn good. Okay, I hadn't had you heard of this movie before it really before you Release I I saw it in a preview from another movie. Okay, I saw a preview Okay, a month or two before and I thought well, I'll watch that Yeah, I was just scrolling Amazon and I saw Jake Gyllenhaal and I was like, I'm in I'm going 5.5. Okay. All right. Well, that's it Alright, thanks for watching the real generation gap again. My name is Shane Schildmeier and I'm still Fred Satili He's still Fred and this has been the covenant guy Richie's the Covenant Thanks for watching the real generation gap as always, please like comment subscribe. Leave us a comment Let us know what you think of Fred's hair Let us know what you think of the Covenant Check us out on Spotify if you don't ever want to you know, watch the YouTube videos and we'll catch you there