NEW TOOLS FOR THE PLOT! / AUGUST 2021 / EMMA'S ALLOTMENT DIARIES

What's happening? What is this? What do all of these flies want with my brussels sprouts? What's going on? There's flies all in here. Oh my god, it's like the apocalypse. What do you want? Surely they don't eat brussels sprouts. Oh god, these have been completely demolished. What's happening? Oh my god. I don't pretend to understand nature, but what I will say is that I put all these wall pellets down to deter slugs and snails around my brussels sprouts and they look to me like they've been more eaten than ever, so I think it actually attracts slugs and snails. It doesn't deter them at all. Oh god, look at that spider. That's not normal, is it? Why is he white? Look in here, look. They've all just been eaten. It's full of flies. It's full of flies, look at this one. That's not good, is it? It's absolutely full of flies in here and I've got no bloody idea why. I couldn't even guess. I don't think flies eat plants though, so I'm going to leave them to it and there seems to be spiders accumulating now to get the flies, so a circle of life and all that, but I don't understand it. All I've ever tried to do is protect those bloody brussels sprouts and all they've done is betrayed me. Stuff them. I don't even like bloody brussels sprouts. I don't know why I'm so obsessed with growing them. I don't even like you. The net's supposed to be impenetrable. Look, sundries of them again. I've just released them. Why did they get back in? How did you get back in? Where are you coming from? They don't even want anything. They're just going in there and then trying to get out again. What's the matter with them? Look, all desperately trying to get in. For what? So much of nature is just completely bloody illogical, isn't it? But then sometimes I think that they must look at us like that, like bugs and insects and things and birds, especially birds because they're always watching. You know, they must look down at humans and go, look, they're so clever, and then, oh, look, why is that one lying out naked in the sun turning like a beetroot? Or why are they having a fight and drinking all this alcohol? They must just look at us and just think we're absolutely bonkers as well. And that's what it's like when I look at bugs. I just think they're mental. Right, welcome back to my channel, by the way. If you haven't subscribed already, I'd love for you to hit the subscribe button and just join along my little journey of adventure. I left Alice's jumper here last time. The kids are at home, by the way, with their dad. I left Alice's jumper here and it's been nibbled. It's been nibbled. So I don't know if that was catty, foxy, ratty, mousy, bloody flies, I don't know. I don't bloody know anymore. It could be anything, to be honest. It could be a wolf. Right, I've got something today to try out. It's this new little thing that goes on my watering can because if you're a regular viewer, you might know my watering can is missing the top. So it's just that. Which isn't really very good, you know, for like, especially when I'm trying to water seeds because it just sort of pours out and floods them away, which isn't really very helpful. So, try and stick this new thing on it. This new thing. If I can get this bloody tape off. Oh, God. What have I done here? Right, OK. So, not that anything needs watering today because it's been so wet and rainy and everything's still quite boggy, but I thought I'd just try it out. To try it out before you need it, you know. I think that goes... That doesn't look right. Why is there an arrow there? They don't fit, do they? That's best going there. I don't think this is right. Somehow. Somehow I don't think this is going to work. I put it on upside down. Oh, God. I bloody hate technology. Is this even technology? I don't think this is technology, is it? It's eviler than that. It's innovative, that's what it is. Where's my bleeding scissors? Right, let's try that again. Right, let's give it a go and water the carrots. I think the carrots need some water. Let's go water the carrots with it and see if it works. Bloody hell, it worked. That's all right, that is. I mean, I've made it complete bog. It probably didn't need that much watering, but that was fun. That's good. I see my little carrots coming up. I don't know if I'll turn into carrots. It's too early to say. It's too early to say, but... That's not. That's grass. That's not carrot. But those little ones that look like grass, they are carrots. Not that, that's a weed. I can't find any now. Oh, there you are. There you are. Carrot. I wonder if there's any slugs in here. Nope. No slugs in there. Of course there's not. OK, the watering thing works. But now I've got to do a more boring job, which is to weed, because you can see the weeds are getting out of control. Especially in this bed. This bed loves weeds. I can grow weeds really well. It's the best thing I can grow in this bed, is weeds. They're amazing. They always do really well, and they always grow back as well, so I'm excellent at growing weeds. But that's the reason I don't like weeding, is because they all bleed and grow back again, so it's just a constant job. I've just noticed that there's a strawberry plant growing in the middle of my path. I don't want to move him now, because he's quite happy there. He's proper settled. I don't know how that's happened. And then over here, look, there's another one. There's another one trying to root in my path. I suppose I'll have to sort out the strawberry patch soon. I hate strawberry patch jobs, because the strawberry patch just gets so overgrown and crazy. It's just an absolute... It's just crazy. But I do think I'm going to get some more strawberries, because I've got more strawberry flowers, and I didn't anticipate this. And they look really healthy and really happy. I'm probably going to get some more strawberries from here, which means that some of the others are probably going to give me more as well. Always worth clearing it, though, because last year I did properly take out all my plants and spaced them properly and stuff, and really looked after them, and I got so many more strawberries. So it is worth doing. It's just annoying, and it just takes bloody ages, as does weeding. But all jobs that need to be done, apparently. My new neighbour just behind me is really clearing the back of my plot for me, because I think he wants to build a fruit cage or something like you do. Like you do, you have to cage your fruit. And it's given me so much more room at the back. I'm not sure if it's going to be that noticeable on camera, but there definitely is more room down here. And my plot goes to the back of that compost bin there, so all along there is my plot. So what I'm thinking for next year is possibly moving some of my raised beds from the front to the back of the plot, because we get more sun at the back. And at the front of the plot, I'm thinking about creating my shed area next to my shed, as opposed to in front of my shed. Does that make any sense? So at the moment what I've got is I've got my shed, and I've got this great big clearing here, which I use to do all my DIY projects. Ha! DIY. And then I've got my bed starting here. What I'm thinking of doing is moving some beds to here and having my DIY area there. And then building a fence around the entire plot, all the way down here, all the way down there, all the way along there, and up that little bit there. That's what I'm thinking of doing. And the fence is not for animals, by the way. It's for humans. Because humans do just come onto my plot and take stuff. So I'm sort of going to try and fence it this year so that they stop stealing my stuff, because it's just so annoying, because that is a public pathway there. Literally there. That's a public pathway. So people just walk down there and then just walk onto my plot and just help themselves to, like, well, they can have the courgettes. I mean, they can have those, because they've got so bloody many. But, I mean, pumpkins, they can't have them. So that's what I'm thinking of doing for next year. It's a bit of a major revamp of the plot, I think, and just making it more productive. Oh, look, Tommy's going to be so happy. You know, he sowed in between these, which are parsnips, he sowed two rows of what they're called, radishes. And look, they're all coming up. They're all coming up. Both his rows have germinated. He's going to be absolutely thrilled with that. I'm wondering if I should protect them, actually. I might put some of that slug stuff down. Oh, God! I don't know what this means, but one of them definitely just bit me. And I've got, like, blood on my hand, so I don't know what the heck is in that stuff. But something in it is alive. I'm a bit wary of it now. I thought it was just, like... Someone told me it came from a goat's bum or something. I was like, what? But, yeah, there we go. It's all down. Hopefully that keeps the slimy little buggers away for a little bit. Right, OK, potatoes, fine. Earth them up, they're fine. I'll check the courgettes in a minute. Corn's doing really well. Oh, my God, what is this? What is that? Is that a dragonfly? He's massive, isn't he? I'm a little bit scared of him, but at the same time, isn't he lovely? Wow! I've never seen a creature like this before, guys. Ever. Flipping ever in my life. I've never seen a dragonfly before, but if I had to guess, I would say that this is a dragonfly. I wish I could ask it. Are you a dragonfly? It must be. God, it hasn't got eyes. Why is there one here and not in my pond? What's wrong with my pond? It's got to be. It's got to be some kind of dragonfly. That's all I can think. See, all the creatures of nature are now happy on my plot. They're all happy here. They all love it on my plot, baby. What can I say? I'm a nature-friendly person. I hope you enjoyed the vlog today. It's going to be a bit of a shorter one, I'm afraid, because I've just got nothing to do. Well, I do, but I don't want to do it because I don't want to do weeding today. It's boring. I could just sit here and stare at the plot all day because it fills me up and makes me so happy, but I've got to get home to my kids now and relieve Dave because he's working from home. Working from home. So I've got to get back and do that. So I do hope you enjoyed the vlog today and I'll keep you updated on all the refurb that I'm going to be doing here. Is that what you call it? Refurb? Rejigging? Yeah, I'm going to do quite major works over the winter, so when everything dies down this year, other than cabbages and more cauliflower and stuff, I'm not going to plant anything out for winter because I am going to be doing quite a lot of moving around and things. So that's exciting, isn't it? And I will see you in my next vlog. Thanks for watching, guys. Bye!