Child Not Interested In Potty Training?  Potty Training Tips, for Boys & Girls

Welcome to this week's video blog. I got an email the other day from a woman with a three-year-old asking when should she start potty training? And the problem was that her son was expressing no interest whatsoever in learning to use the potty. In fact, whenever she talked about it with him he got quite angry and upset about it and really seemed adamant that he did not want to start potty training. And so she was looking for a bit of a guidance in that particular situation, and that's actually a fairly common question. And it tends to happen more often with boys than it does with girls. And we can talk in depth about the differences between boys and girls, but I do find that a lot of boys have some resistance to the idea of starting potty training. Now, my advice to this viewer, though, was that you need to decide if you're ready. So when it becomes an issue of, you know, can he understand a few simple instructions? Can he communicate to you on some level? Then yes, you should be looking for those signs. But a three-year-old, I'm pretty confident, has fairly decent communication skills and understands absolutely everything. So if your child is three and up and you are ready to start potty training, then you make the choice and you go for it. I think too often we rely on our toddler preschoolers to guide us in this journey of parenting. You know, I see a lot of parents over talking issues, asking lots of questions of their toddler and preschooler, looking for them to cooperate, I suppose, or get on board with whatever your plans are for them. And most toddlers won't. Toddlers do not like change and surprise. They like consistency. They like routine. They like predictability. So to throw that upon them, something they have no experience with whatsoever, have no idea what's involved in the whole process of using the toilet, they're nine times out of ten going to tell you no. They don't want to. So this is an issue where you need to step in as the parent and make an appropriate decision. And once you've made the decision, you need to stand behind it. And that might mean that your three-year-old has lots of fits, maybe even a tantrum on the first day. You say, hey, we're giving this a shot. No more diapers for you. It's potty training time. Now, I would suggest you give them a bit of warning on this. So maybe a day or two before you're about to begin your weekend of potty, of diaper-free potty training. You know, just set the stage that we're gonna have a bit of a celebration on Saturday. That's the day we're going to say goodbye to the diapers and start using the toilet. And if he, you know, says no or starts to kick up about it, just let it go. Just say, okay, you know, it's not Saturday yet. No need to worry and proceed with your day. And just drop little hints here and there that the day is coming, all right? So there's no huge surprise when that day arrives. And then again, once you've decided to do this, you need to stand behind that decision. If you waffle back and forth just because your child's giving pushback, then you are teaching your child that you do not mean what you say. And if he acts badly enough, you will give in. And I know that no parent wants to set up that sort of a situation where you're basically rewarding bad behavior. So hang in there. I had a great friend who started potty training her three-year-old son. And he was so mad for about the first two hours of the day. He was, you know, he even threatened he was going to take a pee in her purse. I don't know where he got that from, but he was so angry about it. But they kept, you know, they just tried to ignore it the best they could. They continued to remind him that this was happening regardless. And by the end of the day, problem solved. He was over it. He'd had some, at least a couple of successful events on the potty. So that's, you know, why I want to really encourage you that you need to stand behind your decision. And again, when you're deciding if your child is potty training ready, the biggest question you need to ask yourself is, are you potty training ready? If you're ready to take this on, even though it might be a bit of a challenge at first, then I say you've got your answer. Go for it. Might as well get it started and over with and be diaper-free. And really, that is something to keep in mind, that your ultimate goal here is to have a child who can use the potty independently. And what a blessing. You no longer have to use diapers. You no longer have to do any cleanup. In fact, when you get to the day where your child runs off and goes to the washroom all by themselves, that's a great day. That's a day worth celebrating. So I say go for it. Thanks for watching. Sleep well.