HOW TO GET THE REST YOU NEED, If you are a Tired Mom!

Hi everyone, my name is Emily and this is Queen of the Household. In today's video, I want to talk to you about what it means to get rest as a stay-at-home mom. So, I think a lot of times when moms are asked, you know, how are you doing? What have you been up to? A lot of times our answer is, oh I'm just staying busy or I'm just so tired and it's almost like that's what we're supposed to say to just kind of like prove that we're doing enough and I think sometimes we as stay-at-home moms feel like we have to justify the fact that we're at home with our kids and being homemakers because we feel like, you know, we're not out there making money and working outside of the home and so it almost, to other people, they may view us as lazy or they may view us as not wanting to work when it's probably the complete opposite. But that's how we may think that other people view us and that may be how other people view us. So, we feel like we have to justify ourselves by saying that we're busy and we're tired, you know, but the truth is that you don't have to be that way. You don't have to have this constant state of tiredness. I think it's really, really important for stay-at-home moms to incorporate rest into their day and just into their lives in general as a daily habit and a routine. So, if you are like me, then maybe you grew up just kind of believing that your self-worth was dependent on how you behaved on your actions and on what you did and so the more that you did, the better you were, the more worthy you were. Something that I have had to really work on in my own life is the fact that I don't have to constantly be doing and resting is not wrong. I used to kind of feel like if I took a rest that I was being lazy and I wasn't using my time wisely but the truth is that there should be a balance. Yes, we need to work but we also need to get the rest that our bodies and our souls need. That's part of taking care of ourselves and no one else is going to get that rest that you need. No one else is going to take care of you. You are the one who decides that you are important enough to get that rest. So, there are two forms that I believe stay-at-home moms should really focus on in getting rest and the first is you need your sleep. So often, this is an area that a lot of moms skip out on or they don't get the sleep that they need and it's and the one that is the easiest to fix. So, I know a lot of moms, you know, you have young kids and so maybe they don't sleep through the night and so maybe you kind of blame it on the kids and the fact that they're not sleeping through the night so you're waking up and dealing with them which is totally true and it absolutely happens but you can still get sleep. Maybe it's not like a full night sleep. Maybe it's not the sleep that you had before kids but you can still use what you have to get the sleep that you need. So, let's talk about some specific things that you can do to get better sleep at night. So, number one is to make sure that your kids have a consistent bedtime. When they have a consistent bedtime, they're going to sleep better at night and then you in turn will sleep better at night as well. The second thing is make sure that you have a bedtime. So, when you think about what time you wake up in the morning, count back however many hours of sleep you need whether it's six or seven or eight hours of sleep. Count back as many hours as you need and then make sure that you are in bed and asleep at that time. So, I know how easy it is to want to stay up after your kids go to bed and to just kind of relax and you know you have that free time to yourself and you want to make it last as long as possible but it's really important that you get the sleep that you need for the next day. And then as moms, I know it's really hard to just fall asleep like maybe you pick a bedtime and you are in bed but then you're like tossing and turning for hours and you can't fall asleep and usually that's because there's so much going on in your mind and you just haven't settled yourself. So, think about some things that you could do to kind of settle your mind to help you relax at night. So, for me that is making sure that I have taken care of what I need to during the day and having a plan for the day, doing what I need to and then whatever I didn't get done I will write that down. Sometimes I have to journal out my thoughts because I might have something like playing in my mind and I just need to get it out onto paper. Sometimes I will pray and because maybe it's something that I'm worried about and I just can't get it out of my mind so I'll pray and just ask God to just take that from me so that I can get the rest that I need. And then something that is just really simple is just turning your brain off and I know that sounds easier said than done but really you choose the thoughts and the words that go on in your mind so choose to turn those thoughts off and get the sleep that you need. Okay, so another way that stay-at-home moms can get rest besides just sleeping at night is to get rest during the day. So, like I said before I used to think that my worth was in my doing and so I just thought that I constantly had to be doing something. Something around the house, something with the kids and if I wasn't doing that then I was being lazy and so if I was lazy then I was worthless and so I really took that as you know my self-worth. Well, then one day it occurred to me that my husband at his job you know he gets to clock out for lunch. He has two breaks and when I was teaching I had breaks that I could take. So, the same is true as a stay-at-home mom. You know you don't necessarily punch a time clock but really you're on call 24-7 and so you need breaks. Schedule those breaks in. You know maybe it's taking the kids to a playground and you sitting on the bench and listening to a podcast or reading a book or just sitting there and just resting. Maybe it's taking the kids outside and letting them play while you sit and you watch them play or maybe it is letting the kids watch a movie and you just not doing housework not doing any other kind of things that you need to do but you're just sitting and resting. So, those are just two ways that you can practice self-care by getting rest as a stay-at-home mom. I do want to mention that next week my course self-care 101 for stay-at-home moms is going to be on sale and I made this course because I think self-care has a bad rap especially with stay-at-home moms. A lot of times we think self-care means going and spending the day in a spa or spending a bunch of money on ourselves and we just feel guilty about that but the truth is self-care is really about basic things that take care of you as a person. They're taking care of your needs in both physically, emotionally, and spiritually and this course tackles all of those things and it doesn't just do that to be selfish and to put the focus on you. It really makes you a better person so that you can be a better mom and a better wife and a better friend and just a better person in general for the world to influence the world when you take care of yourself that's when you can take better care of the people who have been placed in your sphere of influence. So, that course is going to be going on sale next week make sure that you look out for that and I will see you in the next video. Bye!