If you're thinking of quitting trading.... watch this

If you're sitting there right now and you've been trading for months maybe even years and you're still not profitable yet or you're still struggling or if you're still blowing accounts every single day and you have no idea why or no idea why you can't stop yourself from doing that well this video is for you i'm not here to sell you anything i'm not going to tell you that it's easy or that trading is a way to make fast cash and it's an easy way to make money because it's not What I am going to do is I'm going to tell you what it actually felt like to be at one of the lowest points in my life chasing this and how I was actually able to come out of it because I talked to a lot of traders in Discord communities or in my DMs or comments and I was exactly where a lot of you guys are at right now and nobody made this video for me when I needed it. So what's up, it's Thrax. I trade futures, I recently won the monthly world trading championship, I make consistent money with prop firms, and I basically trade for a living. But I was exactly just a few years ago, probably in the spot that you are right now, blowing account after account, struggling, not being able to make any money, and I want to make this video to... hopefully help somebody out that was in the position I was in when I was first starting. So let's get into it. So let's take this back and I want you guys to understand how deep I was actually in this before I hit rock bottom and before I was able to turn things around. So in the past, I've traded Forex. I did it for about a year. I basically gave up on it. That was back in like 2018 when everybody was trading Forex. Then I traded cryptocurrencies for a few years. It was on spot, just buying low, selling high. I thought I was a genius, but realistically, what you could have done is just thrown a dart at the top 100 and made some money if you bought it. So then what I ended up doing is, majority of my life I did sales. So I did mortgages, I did all different types of sales, and they were all phone sales. Now, those jobs actually made good money, but I was working 12-hour days. And it was going on for maybe six days a week where I sat in a cubicle just taking calls constantly. And I didn't really like it. I felt like I couldn't really enjoy the hard work that I was putting in. Yeah, I was making decent money, but I didn't really feel like I was living. I just felt like I was working. So what I ended up doing is I ended up quitting my job. And when I quit my job, I quit my job to actually go travel. I built up a nice little nest egg of some money in my savings, as well as I had a lot of money or a decent amount of money in my crypto portfolio at the time. And while I was traveling and doom scrolling through my phone, well, I saw somebody day trading. And I remember thinking to myself, this is what I want to do, right? I don't want to get another job. I don't want to take phone calls anymore. I want to trade. I want to travel. Seemed like the life for me. I thought... This is it, right? I'm not going to get another job. I'm just going to do this and I'm going to figure it out. And here's the thing about me. Majority of my life, right? If I've ever wanted to do anything, as long as I put my time and my effort into it, I've usually been able to get it done. So I thought trading was going to be the same thing. You put in the effort, you get the results. Pretty simple. As long as I work hard at it, I'll get it. Sounded pretty easy at the time. And what ended up happening was the very first account I ever bought. It was an evaluation, a 50K evaluation. I joined some guy's Discord. I copied his trades when he was on a winning streak, and I passed my very first account. And I got so excited that I told everybody that I know. I told family. I told friends. I told them, trading's amazing. You got to do trading. Trading's the way. And you know exactly how it goes when you get your first taste of making money with trading. Passing an account, let's just say, but that excitement is exactly what set the trap because now everyone I know knows that I'm trading, right? And everybody was watching, constantly asking me how it's going, how much money are you making? So then what happens? Well, life starts closing in, right? I thought I needed to lock in, right? So I stopped going outside. I stopped hanging out with friends. I sat in front of these charts for hours and hours and hours every single day. Doing nothing but just looking at candlesticks, looking at order flow charts, backtesting, replay mode, the whole nine. You guys know exactly what I'm talking about. I ended up isolating myself because I thought to myself, if I just locked in for a couple months, I'm going to figure it out. And then everything after that was just going to be sunshine and rainbows. And of course, slowly, I ended up losing all of my money. I... Lost basically all of my savings and at the same time, my crypto portfolio that basically held majority of my net worth. Started dumping and dumping and entering into a bear market and all while this was happening I kept getting more and more aggressive with trading prop firms But I ended up just blowing account after account after account because I was trying to force my way to make money trading prop firms But I was trading out of desperation. I really wasn't trading at all. Rather, I was just gambling and hoping that a moonshot would work and that I can get a payout to replenish my savings, to help pay my bills. And I went pretty far into debt doing this. Not only did I lose all my money, but I also ended up putting a bunch of expenses, a bunch of stuff on credit cards. And I racked up like a $50,000 debt on credit cards with no income, no job. And honestly, I started freaking out. The next thing you know, I'm a year and a half in. I've maybe only passed a couple evals. I've never pulled a payout. I was barely scraping through evals to get the funded account just to blow it right after I activated the account. And it was. Crushing me like every single day, day after day, the same mistakes, the same thing over and over and over again. And then people start asking, how's trading going? How much money are you making? And at first I'd actually tell them the truth. I'd tell them, you know, I'm still figuring it out. I'm still learning. I'm working my way through it. Not really telling them how much I'm really losing, but just telling them I'm figuring it out. Right. But then what happened As time went on, it became rather embarrassing. So, I started to lie to people about it. I wasn't telling them the truth. I wouldn't say I was killing it or making money, but I sure as hell wasn't going to tell them the truth that I was far into debt. I was waking up every single morning here on the West Coast trying to trade New York open at 6.30 a.m. and losing every single day, almost to the point where it was so impressive how consistently I was losing. That I probably could have just done the opposite of what I was doing and I would have made money. I didn't want to admit to anybody how much time and effort I've put into this and how much money I've still lost and how there was no progress being made. I didn't want to admit it. I felt like some type of closet addict. Like some delusional person chasing something that was never going to work. The same thing happening day after day. It was like a hell loop of a cycle. And I honestly just couldn't tell a soul. That's just how I felt at the time. Because here's the thing. Anything in life, right? You go to the gym. You see progress, you learn a sport, you get better, you put in the work, and then you actually get something back. Trading was the first thing that I have ever touched in my life where I could put everything into it, all of my time, all of my effort, all of my attention, and still lose consistently. And that was infuriating because I didn't have a map for that. And at first, nobody does. And then there was a day, I was sitting in my room. At my computer, looking at the screens, I was already deep into debt at this point. I didn't know what I was going to do. I was freaking out. And because I was trading out of desperation, just trying to full port my way to a payout, I ended up blowing four accounts in a single session, back to back, not even copy trading them. I would blow an account in like five to 10 minutes. I'd go pull out the credit card, buy another, then another, then another. And then I blew four and I lost like $450 of my own money, money that I couldn't afford to lose. Another Few hundred bucks added to the balance. I was honestly just trading out of pure rage at that point. And I was not angry at the session or the charts or price action. I was angry at the whole thing. The whole experience. A year and a half of this bullshit where I just can't find any success in what I'm doing. And I wanted to, I remember I wanted to scream. I wanted to break something. But you know what stopped me from breaking anything is Just the fact that I couldn't afford to replace whatever I broke. I was so broke, I couldn't even afford to smash my own stuff. So I just sat there, and if I'm being honest with you guys, I remember that day I actually ended up crying. Now, I wasn't bawling, okay, but I was so frustrated at all of the things that I've been doing and all of this time and effort and how I was seeing no progress. It just was killing me. Inside it was killing me and I want to be real with you guys because I told you that I would be I'm, not usually the type of guy that cries. Okay as a man you kind of just Suck it up Take a deep breath and then move forward as it should be but that day I was just so frustrated And so defeated that it just kind of came out of me and I and I couldn't talk to anyone about this And honestly, I haven't really told people that that happened, but it's just the truth of what I was doing and how I was going about it and how I was trying to full port my way to success, essentially. And the worst part of that really wasn't even the money. The worst part was that I couldn't really talk to anybody about this. I couldn't really talk to anybody about trading because everyone I knew didn't trade. Because for one, well, it's embarrassing. Right? And for two, if I told anybody what was really happening, what were they going to tell me? They're going to tell me to stop. And there's nothing wrong with that because as a person looking in from the outside, that's probably the most logical thing you can say to somebody if you actually care about them. And that was the day. That was the day that I realized I had two options. Either I change something or I have to quit. And that right there, that moment in my trading journey is probably the moment where most people just end up quitting. Now, here's the thing that I didn't understand about trading back then that I understand now. I wasn't trading. I was just full on gambling. And I knew that feeling because I knew the casino. When I go to the casino, I'm not really expecting to make money. If I make money, great. But I'm not really expecting to make money playing slots, playing roulette, Playing roulette, playing blackjack. Let's be honest, usually I just go there to have a good time or get a little bit of adrenaline and I'm just there for the rush. And there's this one mindset that would take over every single time, you know, I got a couple drinks in me and I'm sitting there gambling at the casino. And it's the exact same mindset that I brought to the charts. And what that mindset is, is the mindset is the **** it mindset. That's what I like to call it. For example, I'm playing blackjack. I'm up, I'm down. I'm down even more, then I get back up, then I'm down, then I'm up, then I'm down, back to break even. And then eventually it just gets to a certain point where you're just like, **** it, I'm all in. All my money, right here, this hand. If I win big, I made it, I'm out of there, hopefully I'll leave the casino. If I lose and I crash out, then whatever. **** it. That was the exact mindset I was taking into my trading account. And it's the same thing with like a slot machine. You hit the bonus, you see the money pop up, then what do you do? You think, I'll hit again, just one more time, just see if it happens again. And then you sit there, slamming the button like a ******* idiot, giving it all back. Just hit after hit after hit and they're all losses. And here's one thing I really want you guys to hear. Because I hear all the time from traders, and I guarantee some of you guys do this on the chart, it's called the gambler's fallacy. Let's say at the casino, you watch the roulette board, and when you're looking at the numbers on the roulette board, black has just hit 10 times in a row. And your brain goes, oh, 10 times in a row, red is so due. Red is due. The next spin is going to be red. It's got to be. So then you bet on red, because it's been black for way too long. Now tell me if that sounds familiar, you're looking at a chart, price has just gone up and up and up and up, and your brain goes, oh, it's gone way too up. It's bound to come down now. So you end up just shorting it for no reason other than you felt like it has to come back down. It can't just keep going up. That is the same exact broken brain. That is you sitting at the roulette table betting red because black hit 10 times. The market doesn't owe you a reversal any more than that wheel owed you a red. But I was doing that every single day and just calling it trading, just. Trading based off of how I felt. Trading based off of emotions and off of a gut feeling. And I want to tell you about the part that nobody saw. And I really have never talked about it until this video. Because from the outside, I was fine. But I wasn't. There were nights that I would just lie there staring at the ceiling for hours. Just staring and thinking like, what the hell am I even doing? What am I doing with my life at this point? I'm getting older. I feel like a loser. I was so broke. I couldn't go do anything. I couldn't go out. I couldn't even afford dinner with friends or anything like that. I couldn't do anything that made you feel like a normal person. So I just sit there scrolling, doom scrolling on my phone. And that was basically my life. And of course, what do I see when I'm doom scrolling? Everybody else winning. Everyone who trades is winning yet. I feel like I'm the only person who's losing. Why? And I'll tell you guys something I've never really said to anybody. I used to think that depression was for weak-minded people, honestly. Like, I couldn't even fathom how somebody could be depressed. It was a naive way to think. I know that now. Because the truth is, is that I've loved my life, basically, for the most part. And I've always been able to get through the rough stuff. And I genuinely just couldn't understand. How I could ever feel depressed, let's just say. But during that time, there was like this weight in my chest, right? Constantly, like this thing that's just always hanging over my head. This hell loop of a cycle that's happening every single day. And I remember just thinking to myself, like, ****, like, is this what depression feels like? Now, I don't know if I was ever depressed. And if I was, well, I'm definitely not anymore. But I felt something in that period of my trading journey here that I've never felt. At any other period in my life. So if you're feeling that right now, trying to figure this out, I'm not going to sit here and tell you that I don't know what you're talking about because I do. So with all that, the money being gone, the debt. Not knowing what I was doing. Not knowing how I was going to get out of debt. The nights just staring at the ceiling. Why didn't I just quit? Why didn't I just quit? Here's the honest answer to that. Pride. Ego. And the fact that I'd sunk so much time, so much money into this, that I literally couldn't stop. I just couldn't bring myself to walk away from it. I would have felt like... I honestly I would have felt like such a bitch dude like I already felt like a loser and I thought why would I go through all of this feel like a loser just to actually quit and then really become a loser at least let me win at least let me win I'm in way too deep that's basically what I was thinking in my head and I made a decision It was a reckless decision, I'll admit that, but I made it anyways. I decided that I'm either going to go completely broke trying to figure this out or I was going to get my act together, change what I needed to change, and then actually make progress in the right direction with trading. So I want to tell you guys about a conversation that I had with a close family member. Maybe you guys have had one of these too. I used to talk about trading a lot, and I would talk about trading a lot with family and with friends. And one day, my family member asked me, how's trading going? And I told him the truth. I told him that I was just constantly losing money every single day and that I'm still trying to figure it out. At this point, I'm like a year and a half in, right? Still trying to figure it out. And he told me just straight up like, look. You should probably just quit. I mean, this isn't working, right? You should spend your time on something productive that actually makes money. And it was the most logical thing in the world for that person to tell me at the time. If I was looking at me from the outside, a guy who doesn't trade, I would have said the exact same thing. I look like an idiot. But I remember telling them, I remember getting angry. And I remember telling them, like, don't ever tell me not to do something, right? Don't ever tell me not to try. To be successful at something. And here's the thing I finally understand about why that made me so angry. It wasn't them. Because when they said it, when my friends said it, when other people around me said it, told me to quit, it made me furious. And it's because they were saying the exact thing out loud that I was thinking to myself the entire time. That I was fighting in the back of my head, right? That I should just quit. But hearing someone else say it just made it louder. So then what do I do? Well, then I just stopped talking about it completely. Anyone who asked me about trading, I just shut down every single conversation. I'd tell them, good, yep, it's fine, whatever. I didn't want to talk about it. And I didn't talk about trading again until the day I actually started making money. And obviously I'm posting content on the internet, so now people see it, right? But I essentially just went silent and I just dealt with it alone. So then what actually changed? How do I go from that to then being able to consistently pull payouts with prop firms and then even end up winning a trading championship? And I need to be honest with you guys, because this is where a lot of videos will just go and lie to you, right? It doesn't happen overnight. Anyone who sits there and tells you that one day they just decide they're going to flip a switch and then there was some aha moment and then everything changed overnight is full of ----. That's not how it works. A lot of these things that are holding us back in trading are habits. And bad habits take forever to break. You have to grind at them. For a long time, I knew I needed to change. I just wasn't doing it. And you know why? You know why I wasn't doing it? It's because I was trying to rush the process. I was broke. I was desperate and I was trading this like boom or bust because I needed the boom just to survive. I needed the money so badly at the time that I couldn't let go of chasing that money. And that was the exact thing that was stopping me from progressing in trading. So the shift, the shift when it finally came and it came slowly was this. I stopped focusing on the money as much as I. Possibly could, at least. And I put all of my focus on trading itself. The actual process of trading. On the quality of my execution. On the quality of my decision making. On having some self-control and actually staying contained. And that's it. That's the whole thing. When all I cared about was money and I was trying to trade, well, I stayed broke. Unfortunately, and some of you guys don't want to hear this. Trading is probably, if not, the worst business model that you could possibly ever do if you're in desperate need of cash. Not a good idea. But the second I started caring more about the process rather than the money and let the money be the result of that process, well, then the money finally came. It comes after. It always comes after. But you can't sit here and try and fake that order. You can't chase it and then like pretend you're not chasing it. I mean, I understand why everyone gets into trading. We get into trading because we want to make money. Let's not fool ourselves here. But there's a process of how you need to Learn how to trade in order to make money doesn't start with the focus being on the money yet most people will start with that being their focus and then they just self sabotage themselves out of Desperation and they'll never make any money trading you'll just end up being like the 90 to 95 percent of traders who never make a Single dollar trading you're gonna be the trader that ends up causing these pro firms to be really liquid to have a lot of money And pay their employees a nice little bonus off your frustration And your desperation. So let me give you something real that I did. Let me give you one real thing that I did. Not some motivational bullshit, okay? But at first, let me actually tell you what I didn't do. I didn't do that whole thing you hear from, you know, gurus and traders about, like, all that punishment stuff, like, oh, if you break your rules, do 50 push-ups. That's bullshit. And it's bullshit, well, here's why. If you're not disciplined enough to follow your trading rules, If they're even real rules in the first place, what makes you think that you're going to follow some half-assed punishment that you made up for yourself? You made it yourself, you'll delay it, you'll half-ass it, or you're going to choose some punishment that you secretly wanted to do anyways. Let's say your punishment is push-ups. Well, you wanted to get in shape, so what type of bullshit is that? Let's be serious. You know what I mean? Here's what I actually did. I stopped journaling my feelings. Everyone likes to journal their feelings, how they feel. Well, that's not really going to help you. I started journaling And I have hundreds of pages of this. In a document, an old document on my computer, hundreds of pages, going all the way back to 2023, it's not how I felt today after I lost my money. No, it's what actually happened step by step through the session. Because before you can fix a problem, you need to diagnose it and you need to diagnose the correct issue. You can't just fix or provide a solution to a problem that you haven't. actually properly diagnosed. And what I was hunting for in all of those pages was the tipping point, the line in the sand, the exact moment that I go from making Solid, clean, clear decisions to making stupid ones. Now, every trader has that line in the sand, and most of them have never gone looking for it, or they have not diagnosed the real one. But once I found mine, once I found what actually causes me to break, then, and only then, did I actually start making progress on anything. Because when you find that spot, you find that specific spot, and there's going to be a couple of them, like multiple. Lines in the sand where you go from making calculated decisions to stupid decisions. What you do is you create guardrails around those breaking points or those tipping points. And that is what became the system that I trade today. But it's not built for good days. Anybody can follow their rules or do what they're supposed to do on a good day. The system that you need to build is to protect yourself on the bad days. The days that it's the hardest to follow them. Rules. are not for when you're winning they're for when you're about to have a catastrophic session and blow everything. And a real rule has to be specific. It has to have an action. Don't over trade. Don't force a trade, don't chase, don't FOMO, don't oversize. Those are useless. Those are not rules. That's a wish, okay? A rule is a specific line with a specific action attached to it because that is what actually holds. So let me talk to the person I made this video for. I still have all those old journal entries. I have all the video diaries I used to make for years Here's talking about how... bad this all was while I was trying to figure out how to trade. And sometimes I go back and I watch them. And I'll be honest with you guys, because sometimes when I do that, well, sometimes it makes me emotional because I can see it. I can see how lost that guy or that version of me was. I can see how much pain and frustration I was in at the time trying to figure this out and not being sure or not knowing if this was ever going to work out or if I was just going to lose all my money. And I was just going to be a complete failure and just a loser and then have to go do something else. And I am so grateful that I did not quit. Not because I sit here and I think, oh, I made it. I don't even think like that. But because I got to the point where I've proved something to myself. I've proved something to that past version of me. Here's the thing that I hold on to that I want to give to you guys. I can feel like a loser. That's allowed. That's totally allowed. We can feel like a loser sometimes, especially on the hard days. But the only time you actually become one, the only time you cement it into reality is the day that you quit. That's it. That's literally the whole difference. As long as you're still in it, you're still working on it, you're still showing up, trying to do the right thing, well, the story isn't over. The market and these charts. Humbled me in a way that nothing in my life ever had. But I'm grateful for it because it forced me to become someone who can actually do this. So if you're in that room right now, if you're... Just like me, staring at the ceiling, not knowing if this is ever going to work out, embarrassed to tell people around you what's really happening. I'm not going to sit here and tell you that this is easy because we all know it's not. And if you think this is easy, then you probably didn't get that far into this video. I'm just going to tell you that I was there. I was exactly where you are. And the only reason that I'm here now is because I refused to make that feeling permanent. Change one thing. Then change one more. It's gradual. It's supposed to be. So I don't know. I just got on to just yap, basically. Hopefully this helps somebody out. If it does, let me know in the comment section down below. That's it. I'll catch you guys next time. Peace.