Men DON’T Want Love First… They Want THIS Instead

There are only two paths you can take with men. Only two. Path one is you become a magnet. You pull in the devotion, the pursuit, the commitment that you actually desire. Path two, you become a chaser. You're constantly reaching, overgiving, seeking his validation, yet you never truly feel secure or chosen. Now this isn't your typical, don't chase, just attract talk you've heard a million times. What I'm about to reveal are some raw truths that will either open your eyes or make you angry. Possibly both. My name is Brody Boyd and today I'm going to teach you five shifts, five simple but powerful shifts that will instantly make you magnetic to quality men. Because when you miss these, you end up anxious, you end up mothering him, and you turn into his therapist instead of his lover. And that is how attraction dies a slow, painful death. And if you're ready to attract a loyal, masculine man who's not going to waste your time, who's not going to give you mixed signals, and who's actually going to step up and commit to you, I've also got a free gift for you. You can take our free Magnetize Your Man love quiz where you'll get your top personalized recommendation for exactly what you need to do next to get the relationship you want with the man you want. Just go to magnetizeyourman.com or click the link in the description below to get that. All right, let's dive into point number one, hunting versus gathering. So picture this, we're back in ancient caveman hunter times. And I know, just bear with me, so to speak. So the men, they're out there with spears, tracking woolly mammoths, risking their lives, competing with other hunters. That's the masculine role, the hunter, the pursuer, the one who goes after what he wants. The woman, they're back at the village. They're gathering berries, selecting the best resources, creating community, nurturing relationships. That's the feminine role, the gatherer, the attractor, the one who draws resources to her. Now, here's the problem. It's 2026 and you're out here acting like you've got a spear and you're hunting lions, except the lion is named Chad and he ghosted you three weeks ago and you're still trying to track him down. You're texting first, you're asking him out, you're making all the plans, you're bringing up the talk. You're basically doing everything except tackling him to the ground and screaming, commit to me, why won't you commit to me? And then you're wondering why he's not pursuing you. So the law of polarity states that opposite energies attract. Masculine and feminine. When you're in your masculine energy, hunting, chasing, pursuing, you repel masculine men. It's like trying to push two magnets together with the same poles. They end up pushing each other away. Or if you're like the dog chasing the rabbit, what is the rabbit likely to do? Run away. But when you're in your feminine energy, attracting, receiving, and radiating, you pull him in like a tractor beam. Now, here's the thing. Men are biologically wired to pursue. That's how they get their sense of value as men. That's how they feel like a man. When you chase him, you rob him of that. You take away his hero's journey and then you're confused why he's not feeling it. You want him to feel like he conquered something? Then be something worth conquering, not something that conquered itself and then complained that he didn't help you. Now, I can hear you saying, but Brody, what if he doesn't pursue me? What if he never texts me first? Now, that's a great question. It's either one of two things. Either he hasn't been activated into his healthy masculine energy yet because you've been in your masculine, or he may be a broken man, or he may just not be into you. And if that's the case, then it's actually good information because you don't want a man that you have to drag into a relationship like a stubborn donkey. You want a man who wants to be there with you. Think about it like fishing versus hunting. Hunting is masculine. You go out, you track, you chase, you kill. Fishing is feminine. You cast out the line. You put the bait out there. You wait, and the fish comes to you. Then you decide if you want to keep it or throw it back in. Be the bait, not the hunter. Okay, here's another way to think about this. It's a more feminine analogy, perhaps. You're the flower. He's the honeybee. The flower doesn't chase the bee around the garden screaming, pollinate me, pollinate me, pollinate me. The flower just sits there looking beautiful, looking radiant, smelling amazing, and the bee comes to it. But you, you're out there chasing bees with a net and wondering why they keep flying away. So here's what you need to do instead. You signal. You smile. You're warm. You're open. You're receptive. You show him the green light, but you don't drive the car. He drives. You enjoy the ride. Stop hunting. Start gathering. Stop chasing. Start attracting. All right, let's get to point number two. Initiating versus signaling. Imagine you're a woman in the 1800s. You're walking through the town square. You're wearing a beautiful dress, and then you accidentally drop your handkerchief. Oh no, what's a woman to do? The gentleman sees it. He picks it up and returns it to you with a bow. That's his opportunity to be your hero. That's his opening. That's signaling. Now imagine this. You drop the handkerchief, and before he can even move, you bend down, snatch it up yourself, dust it off, and then look at him and say, what, are you blind? A lady just dropped something. Some gentleman you are, sir. This is what it feels like to a man when you initiate everything and you're in your masculine. When you text him first, when you bring up exclusivity, when you ask where the relationship is going, when you plan every date, when you make the first move, when you give, give, give, give, give to him, you are picking up your own handkerchief. Feminine energy signals. Masculine energy initiates and takes the action. Think of it like a stoplight. You're not the car. You're the spotlight. Green light means yes, I'm open. Yellow means slow down. Red means stop. I'm not comfortable. I don't want any more. But you're not driving in the car. He is. You're just showing him whether to go, slow down, or stop. Now I know you may be thinking, but Brody, again, this is 2026. We don't need to wait for men anymore. We're empowered. Okay, I get it. I get it. You're an empowered boss, babe, miss independent. And I would pose the question, how is that working for you? How is that working in your love life? Be brutally honest. And listen, you can do whatever you want. You can text him first. You can ask him out. You can propose to him on one knee if you really want to. But don't come crying when he's not stepping up, not pursuing and treating you like his buddy instead of his girlfriend, instead of his queen. Because here's what you need to understand. Men fall in love through pursuit. And when a man pursues you, when he works for you, when he earns you, his investment goes up. His attachment goes up. His commitment level goes up. And when you make it too easy, when you do all the work, when you hand yourself to him on a silver platter, he doesn't value you because he didn't have to work for you. You've given him more free trials than Netflix. And at some point, he's got to subscribe and give you that credit card or get the F out. Here's what signaling looks like. You make eye contact. You smile. You laugh at his jokes. You're warm. You're present. You ask him questions. You share how you feel. You ask for help. Saying things like, I love spending time with you. That's signaling. Here's what initiating looks like. So where's the relationship going? When are you going to ask me to be your girlfriend? We need to talk about our future. What have you planned for us for this weekend? That's initiating. That's leading him. And that's masculine energy. By the way, I'm not saying you never speak up. I'm not saying you're a doormat who just sits there like a houseplant. I'm saying there's a feminine way to communicate your desires. It's called magnetic feminine communication, and we teach it in our advanced courses. You can say something like, may I share something with you? I've been feeling anxious lately, and I've noticed that we've been dating for a few months. I'm telling myself a story that you may not want to be exclusive, and I'm not sure what to do. See the difference? You're sharing how you feel. You're not telling him what to do because the masculine tells, the feminine asks in a respectful way. The masculine commands and directs, the feminine receives and flows and follows. So drop the handkerchief. Don't pick it up for him. Don't tell him to pick it up. Signal. Don't initiate. All right, point number three, and this one is huge. Respect versus love. Ephesians 533 says, husbands, you must love your wives and wives, you must respect your husbands. Love and respect. Now here's what most women get wrong. You're trying to love a man into commitment. You're showering him with affection. You're doing everything for him. You're basically his personal assistant, his chef, his therapist, his life coach, and his mom all rolled into one. You're doing more for him than Amazon Prime, and he's not even paying a fee. Men don't crave love the same way that women do. Men crave respect. And let me say it again for the people in the back, because I know some of you just had a feminist seizure. Men crave respect more than anything else. Women want to feel cherished, adored, loved. Men want to feel respected, trusted, and admired. And when you don't give him respect, when you criticize him, nag him, tell him what to do, correct him in front of his friends, question his decisions, he shuts down. He pulls away and he stops trying. Because you're essentially telling him, I don't trust you. I don't respect you. And you're not capable. This causes a feeling of death inside of him as a man. Now, I'm not saying you have to agree with everything he does. I'm not saying you have to submit to abuse or poor treatment from him. I'm saying there's a way to communicate that respects his masculine core and gets your desires met. Let me give you an example. Let's say he makes a decision that you don't agree with. Maybe he wants to go to a certain restaurant and you hate that restaurant. The masculine way of handling this would be say, oh, no, I hate that place. We're not going there. Let's go to the other one instead. The feminine way would be saying, may I ask if we can eat at this other restaurant instead? I would really love that. See the difference? One is commanding. One is asking. One is telling him he's wrong. One is simply sharing how you feel, making a respectful request and asking for his help. Do you think a man is more attracted to his coach or his cheerleader? But you're out here acting like his coach oftentimes. You need to do this. You're doing it wrong. Here's how you should do it. Let me manage your life because clearly you can't handle it on your own. When you respect a man, when you trust his leadership, when you appreciate him for that, something magical happens. He wants to then earn your respect even more. He wants to live up to it. He wants to be a better man to be your hero. One of our clients, Stephanie, she was constantly criticizing her man, always correcting him, always telling him how to do things better. And he was, surprise, surprise, pulling away. And when she started working with us, we taught her about respect. She started saying things like, thank you so much for handling that. I really appreciate you. She started trusting his decisions instead of questioning everything. She started asking for his opinion on things instead of telling him hers. And shockingly, within three months, he ended up proposing to her because when she respected him, he felt like a king. And when a man feels like a king, he treats you like his queen. A man doesn't fall in love with the woman who gives him the most. He falls in love with the woman who he's the most afraid to lose. So stop trying to love him into commitment. Start respecting him. Give him what he craves and he'll be much more likely to give you what you crave. Right, point number four, which is closing versus opening. I have a quick question for you. What's more attractive to a man? Do you feel a woman wearing a full suit of medieval armor or a woman wearing a bikini? Now, I want you to apply that analogy and that visual to your heart. When your heart is closed, when you're guarded, when you're wearing that suit of armor, or when you have your walls so high that you're like Rapunzel wanting to escape, when you're protecting yourself, you're in masculine energy. The masculine protects, the feminine is protected. And I get it. You've been hurt. You've dated emotionally unavailable men. You've been ghosted, breadcrumbed, catfished, scammed. Some guy probably told you you were his dream girl and then disappeared faster than toilet paper during COVID. So you built walls, you put on your armor, you decided you weren't going to get hurt ever again. But here's the problem with that. When you're closed, he can't feel you. He can't connect with you. He can't fall in love with you. Love requires vulnerability. Intimacy requires openness. Connection requires you to take off the armor and show him your heart. Feel about it. When you close your heart, you're energetically telling him, I don't trust you. I don't feel safe with you. Stay back. And when he feels that, he likely doesn't pursue. Why would he? You're a fortress. He's not going to lay siege to your castle. He's going to find a woman who actually opens the door. I mean, even the prince wasn't able to rescue Rapunzel until she finally let down her hair for him. So here's what opening your heart looks like. It looks like you sharing your feelings. All of them. Not just the pretty ones, not just the positive ones, but the messy ones too. May I share something with you? I feel some anxiety right now. I feel sad when plans get canceled and I tell myself that I'm not important to you. I feel so happy when I'm with you. Thanks for making me laugh. Those are examples of vulnerability. That's opening your heart. There are no ugly emotions, only ugly behaviors. You can actually feel jealousy, anxiety, insecurity, neediness. Those are valid and real human emotions. What matters is what you do with them. Do you attack him? Do you close up? Do you try to manipulate him? Try to control him? Or do you share vulnerably using magnetic feminine communication? Let me tell you a story from my own marriage. When Nancy and I were dating, it was about a few months in. We were sitting in my apartment in San Francisco. And she said to me, part of me wants to manipulate you right now. And I was a bit shocked and intrigued to be honest. And I said, what do you mean? Tell me more. And she told me about how she was a little bit frustrated because I wasn't spending time with her earlier. And she was telling herself that I didn't care. And that part of her wanted to start manipulating me and making me feel guilty. But instead of doing that, instead of going into the guilt tripping, she actually shared with me what was going on for her and was authentically vulnerable while also respectful. And you know how I felt in that moment. I wasn't angry. I wasn't defensive. I actually felt more connected to her, more trusting of her because she was being real with me. She was being vulnerable and very authentic. She was opening her heart to me and showing even the messy parts. That's the feminine. That's magnetic. But you probably hide that part of you. You pretend you don't care. You act like Miss too cool for school and aloof. Or you just close up or don't say anything or start an argument instead. You play hard to get. You put on the armor. And then you wonder why he doesn't feel connected to you. Love requires your heart to be accessible, not locked behind 20 feet of steel. So take off the armor. Open your heart. Yes, it's scary. Yes, you might get hurt. But you know what's scarier? Living your whole life closed up, never experiencing real intimacy, real connection, real love. And then you observe and you see what he does with that. Because when you open your heart and share vulnerably, you get to see who he really is. If he steps up, if he cares for your heart, if he wants to protect you and make you happy, he's the right man. If he doesn't care, if he dismisses your feelings, if he doesn't step up after 90 days of being in your full feminine, he's not your right man. And that's good information. That's the 90-day challenge we teach in our Magnetic Feminine Polarity Course. Open your heart. Let him in. Be vulnerable. All right, point number five. This one's going to be controversial, but stay with me. Stop setting boundaries with him. Start setting boundaries with yourself. Now, before all the therapists in the comments come after me, let me explain what I mean with this. So when you say things like, you need to stop doing that. You need to respect my boundaries. You can't treat me that way. You can't talk to me like that. That's masculine energy. You're directing him. You're commanding. You're controlling him. You're trying to change him. Now, here's the feminine way. You don't set boundaries with him. You set boundaries with yourself. Now, what does this mean? It means you decide what you will and will not accept, and then you act accordingly. Here's an example. He keeps canceling plans last minute. Here's the masculine way of handling this. You can't treat me like this. You need to stop canceling these dates on me. That's so disrespectful, and you need to prioritize me. Here's the feminine way of handling this. May I share something with you? I feel sad when our plans get canceled, and I tell myself that I'm not a priority to you. And then if he keeps doing it after you've shared your respectful, vulnerable feelings around it, then you decide what to do next. I don't feel comfortable continuing to date someone where I don't feel like a priority, so I'm going to step back and create space for a man who values my time. That's setting a boundary with yourself. You see the difference. You feel the difference. You're not controlling him. You're controlling yourself, your availability, your energy, and your heart. Proverbs 4.23 says, Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. Guard your heart. Don't try to guard his behavior. Here's another example. He's not calling you his girlfriend after three months. Here's the masculine way of handling this. We need to talk. What are we? Where's this going? I need you to answer me. Here's the feminine way of handling this. May I share something? I'm feeling some anxiety because I've noticed we've been seeing each other for a while, and I'm telling myself a story that maybe you don't want to be exclusive, and I'm not sure what to do. And then if he says he's not ready yet, you decide. Well, I'm looking for a committed relationship, so I'm going to have to create space for a man who wants that with me. You're not giving him an ultimatum. You're not trying to manipulate him. You're sharing how you feel and making a decision or giving an ultimatum to yourself about what you will and will not accept. That's the difference between a queen and a doormat. A doormat accepts everything and anything. A queen has standards and is able and willing to walk away when they are not met. But here's the key. You have to actually mean it. You can't just say it to manipulate him into changing. You have to genuinely be willing to walk away. Because when you set boundaries with yourself, when you're willing to walk away from men who don't value you, you send a powerful message, not even to him, but to yourself. You tell yourself, I'm worthy, I'm valuable, and I deserve better. And when you believe that, when you embody that, you start attracting men who treat you that way. Because the quality of men you attract is directly proportional to how much you value yourself. So set boundaries with yourself, decide what you will and will not accept, and then act on it. Now there is one specific moment where you actually should set a boundary specifically with a man. And that is whenever you feel physically unsafe. If that's ever the case, then be willing to just tell him what to do, to stop, to get out, whatever you need to do to get back to a place of safety within yourself. All right, so let's recap. Point one, stop hunting, start gathering. Be the flower, not the bee with a net. Point two, stop initiating, start signaling. Drop the handkerchief and let him pick it up. Point three, give him respect to get his love. Be the cheerleader, not the coach. Point number four, open your heart. Take off the armor. Vulnerability is magnetic. Point five, set boundaries with yourself, not with him. Be a feminine queen who has real standards. These five shifts will instantly make you more magnetic to men. Not because you're playing games, but because you're opening up from authentic feminine energy. And that's what creates lasting attraction, chemistry and commitment. And if you're ready to dive deeper with this, make sure to take our free Magnetize Your Man Love Quiz right now. You'll get your personalized top recommendation to attract the relationship you want with a man you want right away. Click the link in the description or comments below, or go to our website, magnetizeyourman.com to get that. Thanks so much for subscribing to our channel. And I'm proud of you for actually being here, doing the work and becoming the magnetic woman you were always created by God to be. Now go out there and be magnetic. I'll see you soon.