how living with my boyfriend is REALLY going, wedding talk and dating problems

This week, we're chilling out. I've actually decided to take a chill pill. Are you and your boyfriend living together? How do you deal with people being judgmental of your relationship timing? The number one top asked question I have been getting is asking about needlepoint restock. And honestly, if you want to change your life, like just try it out. How do you find friends to have dinner parties with? How do you find friends to play Mahjong with? How do you find friends to needlepoint with? How do you find friends for the grandma hobbies? I wake up six to seven. I sit by the fire. I do my morning pages. I'll do a little bit of reading, walk for an hour, and then go weight train. Interior design tips when you like several different aesthetics. House Guest, the ultimate comfort show. You listen to this when you want to feel better about life. Hi, House Guest. Welcome back to my home. This week, y'all are coming over and you and I are just catching up on the couch. We are talking about quite literally everything under the sun. I asked y'all for questions. I'm answering them. I'm talking about moving in with my boyfriend, talking about the upcoming wedding plans for my sister. I'm talking about like literally everything We're talking about grief. We're talking about identity, moving tips, interior design. Like it's really, truly all over the place. Friendship breakups, everything. Like we're covering it all. So I hope you guys enjoy. And without further ado, let's get on to the episode. Hi, y'all. Welcome back to the couch. You and I are just sitting and catching up today which I'm really looking forward to. We have been doing so many guest episodes, so many really amazing, perfect specials of the Valentine's Day special, the Thanksgiving special. It's actually crazy that I haven't been doing, well, let us not forget Christmas of 2025. Macy and I only dressed up. I was Mrs. Claus and she was an elf. It's kind of crazy that I haven't been doing these really extravagant specials because I'm like the most over-the-top person when it comes to seasonal things, holiday things. And I'm bringing that back. Like that is something that we are bringing into this year. Like this year, Houseguest, the ultimate comfort show. You listen to this when you want to feel better about life and like feel comforted or inspired or like you're just sitting there with friends, whatever it might be, and also to celebrate and to really just be over the top in every single way possible. So anyway, with that being said, this week we're chilling out. I've actually decided to take a chill bell and we are going to just be doing a little Q&A. I'm answering a ton of questions that y'all have been asking. Also, I do just want to preface this by saying if you guys are watching on YouTube, which if you aren't, you should be, it's way better. The show is like built for YouTube, okay? But if you're watching on YouTube and you're seeing me with my shoes on the couch, it's making me physically ill. Like I actually feel uncomfortable doing this and my mother would kick my ass if I was home. I also, for the record, would never put shoes on a couch. But right now I want to sit this way and I can't have bare feet because then I'll end up on that Wookiee feet place or whatever it is. I don't know. Whatever that website is for people with like foot fetishes. I can't do that, okay? So we're just going to look the other way and move on with our lives, okay? What have I been up to recently? January, well, I feel like I'm still recovering from January. I'm going to be honest. January is already a hard month for me and then there was just horrible. It wasn't, okay, here's the thing. I don't want to say it was a horrible month. It was a very, very, very hard month. Very, very hard. February is also, you know, there's always things going on. So I'm just going to high level the positives, okay? The rodeo, we went to the rodeo. We're in March at this point, like you guys don't even care. I've been hosting so many fun dinner parties. We did the Ina Garten dinner party, her 78th birthday party. Excuse me, dinner party, not a dinner party. It was a birthday party. Obviously I had all 20 of my closest friends come up dressed as Ina Garten, bringing their favorite Ina Garten dish. That was so fun. We did the celebration dinner party. I don't know if I've talked about this on the podcast. Since everything goes on my YouTube channel, I just feel like I'm always talking to you guys and like keeping you guys up to date and in the loop. If you guys are a podcast listener, this is the last time I'll plug YouTube, but I'm just telling you. If you're a podcast listener and you've never watched my YouTube videos, I do like weekly vlogs pretty much every, actually I do them every single week. And it's a lot of, if you like the podcast, you would love the vlogs basically. That's all I'm going to say. And then you would get two episodes essentially a week. There's a vlog and the podcast episode. Anyway, without further ado, let's get into the questions because I'm just going to ramble on forever and ever. Okay. The number one top asked question I have been getting is asking about needlepoint restocks. Now, by the time this episode goes up, I don't know where we are at with what collections have dropped. But I will say that for the OG collection, which that could be coming out very soon, I don't know. We switched manufacturers, so that was the issue, or we've switched services, so that was the issue with we couldn't do a restock because we had to have it made separately and go on from there. Now, what's happening in the needlepoint world is that the actual canvas, there's a shortage of. So we're having a lot of issues. Also, the demand is higher than ever. So people who are doing the actual services have a surge in the workload that they have, and also they don't have enough canvases. There's a stretcher bar shortage. There's all these things. So like the needlepoint world, it's a tough world to be in right now. So for anyone asking all the questions and why there's so many delays and all the things that are happening, that is why. And we are working so hard on so many amazing things. We have so many of our actual stuff, like honestly for like most of the year, like so many of our canvases and like collections and stuff are, not the canvases, the collection designs are done. It's just like the services and stuff. So anyway, that's where people, that's where my home brand friend of mine, in case you guys are wondering, but I get asked that like literally 24 seven. So that is the answer, the long story short. Actually, that's a short story, long, I guess, but that's what's happening there. And we are doing our best, but we've had other drops since. And again, like this is before those come out. So I don't know what's happening, but that is why there's a little delay in Needlepoint. Moving on to the next question. So I get this question all the time. How do you find friends to have dinner parties with? How do you find friends to play Mahjong with? How do you find friends to Needlepoint with? How do you find friends for the grandma hobbies? And then I also get the like, how do I find a Charlie? Like, you know, my boyfriend is a perfect angel. He's never done anything wrong in his life. The answer to all those questions is actually the same thing. You need to build the life that you want and you're gonna attract what you're looking for. When I started doing all the grandma hobbies and hosting the dinner parties and all that, I didn't have friends that were doing that. I started to get my friends involved. And then I also met friends through those hobbies that I started to invite. So really, you just have to be the change that you wish to see in the world, truly. No, but in all seriousness, you just need to start doing it. Host a dinner party for four friends. They don't need to be friends that love a dinner party. Start doing it. Start posting. Oh, I just threw my ring across the room. Okay, it's over there. Start hosting and inviting people. You need to build it and they will come. And over time, as you're doing that, you're going to find people who are also doing that. Whether you are out and about in the wild at the needlepoint store, wherever it is. It could be any hobby, like woodworking. I don't know, literally any hobby. Surfing, all of those things. You inevitably are going to meet people who are doing what you're doing because you are living a life where you are doing those things. So you can't wait to have the friends to then do that. You have to do it to find the friends that do that, if that makes any sense. Same thing for finding the right partner, like someone that you actually want to date, period. You need to build the life that you want because that life will then attract the partner that you want. I feel like a lot of my issues in my earlier 20s was that I wasn't actually living the life that I wanted and not, of course, we're never fully where we want to be. We're never fully, you know, for me, it's like I am an anachronist, so a lot of it's about success and achievement and all that stuff. There's always things that I'm going to want to do. I'm never going to be in the perfect place for anything. It's less about that and also less about like, I want to live in the perfect, it's not really that stuff. It's more of like the mentality of like, this is the life that I want. This is what I'm curating for myself. We talk about this, actually this comes up quite a bit on the podcast, even just with guests, of you really are what you consume and how, you know, for lack of a better term, like your diet is a lot more than food, right? So like, I always talk about what you consume is so important and that's kind of like the life that you build, whether it's like the books that you read, we talked about this in Samantha's episode very recently, the books that you read, the shows that you watch, the music that you listen to, the followers, the influencers you follow, the friends you follow, like you are, those are all free ways to kind of lean into the life that you want to live. So while you may never be, this is a very long-winded answer, you don't need to be exactly where you want to, where you need to be to then find those things is basically what I'm getting at, but you need to just kind of start building that life because that is how you are going to, you're gonna meet dinner party friends by hosting dinner parties, like that's really what it is. And more often than not, I meet girls out and about and they're like, oh my God, I want to do all the things that you guys do, I'm so jealous, but like my friends just like, I'm not on board, I haven't found friends that will do that yet. And like, so long story short, you find those things by building the life that you want and then they come to you. Let me tell you all about my favorite little afternoon treat. I'm always needing a little afternoon snack to get me through the day. And here's my problem, I love coffee, I drink a lot of coffee, and if I drink coffee in the afternoon, it ruins my whole like night routine and then I'm up all night and then I just like don't wake up the next morning, it's like a whole thing. And it also gives me a lot of anxiety and it's just not good, okay? So I have mastered, by mastered I mean I found something, the art of fixing an afternoon slump and that is awake chocolate, okay? These chocolates are really good, this is my personal favorite, they are the favorite of my house, it's the mint dark chocolate bites. Each little, I'll show you, each little chocolate bite, if you will, has 50 milligrams of caffeine, so it's a half a cup of coffee, gives you that nice little boost that you need, nothing too crazy, nothing too little, it's really the perfect amount. They also have different flavors. So we have this one, and this has peanut butter, milk chocolate bites also really good, they're all really good honestly. Milk chocolate bites and then the caramel milk chocolate bites, they're amazing. I also like throwing them in my purse because you just never know when like your crash is gonna hit and like I don't like getting coffee out that much, not for any other reason other than I'm like really particular in how I like it and I have like weird reactions. So I like to just have this with me at all times, especially when I'm traveling, I just throw them in my purse and they're so amazing. Awake is an innovative functional chocolate brand that combats the afternoon scaries while providing a delicious and sweet snack. Each bite is crafted with a fair trade chocolate, 50 milligrams of caffeine and is 60 to 70 calories per bite. The 3 p.m. slump is an all too real phenomenon that can be difficult to overcome, it's too late in the day for a coffee or an energy drink, but still a few hours left to work. That is where Awake Chocolate comes in. It is the best and like easiest thing in the world to add into your routine and they are just so good. So I do have a code for y'all, just stay tuned. Visit awakechocolate.com and use code houseguest at checkout for 15% off your order. That is awakechocolate, A-W-A-K-E-C-H-O-C-O-L-A-T-E.com. Use code houseguest for 15% off your order. It is amazing. And I really like the mint chocolate ones, like if you're gonna get any, actually, I guess maybe try the variety pack probably. Personally, this one is my favorite, but I have tried them all. So anyway, let's get back to the episode. Okay, next up on our Q&A, I was getting some questions about my sister's wedding. She is getting married in Greece in May, so we're going for a week. I'm the maid of honor, obviously. And then, actually Charlie's in the bridal party. Is it? No, he's a groomsman. But that's still a bridal party, right? I don't know. I literally know nothing when it comes to this stuff. So we're going. It's gonna be a smaller wedding, obviously. It's in Santorini. It's gonna be a really, really insane time. So that's gonna be really fun. We're going to Greece for a week. And then we come back. I think we have another family vacation shortly after that. But yeah, it's gonna be fun. I don't know, not how to think about it. March, as you guys are listening to this, is the month of showers for me. I'm hosting my sister's bridal shower. I'm hosting my cousin Alyssa's baby shower. So much is happening. What an exciting year. And then I'm also, for my cousin, she's having a baby and she's the first of all the cousins to have a baby. And I wanna do that nesting weekend where people come over and they clean and they help you organize, they help you build stuff. They cook soups, they do broth and all this stuff and put it in the freezer to have for the early days of postpartum. So that's gonna be another weekend of March. I'm hoping we go on a stitch retreat. You guys are not asking me about this, but we had to reschedule the stitch retreat that we were gonna go on. It's just like a self-plan amongst my friends and I. And we rescheduled that. Hopefully that's happening soon. So updates to come on that. But yeah, the wedding is gonna be in May. It's in Greece. I think there's like 40-ish people coming. It's gonna be fun. It's like a really good group. And they're doing their civil, of course, here in America, because you have to. And then it's gonna be in Greece. So that's gonna be a really fun time. Looking forward to that. I actually just tried on my outfits recently for it. Also, guys, I'm having a hard time because she is having a stew. Sorry, I'm holding the water and it's making all this noise. But she's doing that thing for her rehearsal dinner where it's a white theme, which is giving me so much stress because one, just wearing white to a wedding of any sort. I know that we're supposed to. It's just making me stressed out. But also, it's hard to find things that are white that aren't so bridal-looking. I mean, I guess for Greece it'd be easier now that I'm thinking about it. I don't know. But something about it being white, it's just really stressing me out. So updates to come on that. Interior design tips when you like several different aesthetics. Okay, my house isn't the, I wouldn't even know really what to call it, but I feel like over time, my aesthetics throughout my 20s have changed a lot and I've tried on a lot of different things. What I have realized is that I am definitely more of a traditional home. I love nostalgia. I want it to be a home that was lived in. Of course, I love Nancy Meyers stuff. It's not so Nancy Meyers in the sense that it's white and blue and a beachfront property or anything like that with a bunch of linens. But it's Nancy Meyers to an extent. I think I see it. I say that because when people think Nancy Meyers aesthetic, I don't think that they, I think what they think is not necessarily what my house looks like, but my house is definitely still very Nancy Meyers, just in the way that isn't as popular online. I say that mainly because it's not all white and blue. But anyway, I think when you are decorating a home, the first thing is you don't need to do it all overnight. The worst thing you can do, honestly, is buy everything up front. I think you need to have a house that's lived in and collect pieces over time. I would not try to get everything done in two seconds. Like houses take like years and years to decorate and honestly, it's like always an ongoing project. The second thing is buy things you like and naturally you will make them work together. Now, when you like completely different aesthetics, maybe you're just like molding those two aesthetics and bringing them together, but you don't have to like just subscribe to one if that makes any sense. So what I do when it comes to decorating is like if I see something and I love it, I just buy it. It's not, I mean, not like I just buy it immediately, but I mean like if I like something a lot, I will buy it and I will figure out a place to put it in the house and make it work. I'm not necessarily, I'm always like, there's in the back of my head, I'm like, okay, there's a couple of things that I need and I'm looking for that, whatever. But when it comes to like decorations and things in that nature, I'm not so strict on it. I just buy a lot of the things that I like and then they end up inevitably working together. I have realized over time, I'm way less into, I think it's a trendy home aesthetic, but also at the same time, like everything is a trend. You know what I mean? I just, a lot of what my house is now is kind of like a more updated version of the homes that we grew up with amongst myself and our cousins, just with like a little bit more of a me twist. Like there's definitely really subtle like Western Texas elements. I definitely have a bunch of like nods to Texas and Nantucket in this house. And over time I've been able to build that, but it's not like I sat down and I bought everything at once and I was like, this is the aesthetic of the house. I just bought things that I liked and inevitably like I made them, you just make them work together. I also am not someone who likes a ton of like super, super matchy stuff at all. Charlie's mom, Susie the icon, also an interior decorator. I say also because my family is not because I am. And she's probably the closest actually to my taste. I love her stuff. Like it's way more of like my vibe. And she has pattern on pattern on pattern on everything. And it would be in a room that like looks amazing and you would never think anything of it. But like if you were at the store, you probably wouldn't put those two things together. But again, it's like you see things that you like, you put them together because you like them and inevitably they end up working out. So I would just buy things that you like and you can match the aesthetics together if you want. Like I wouldn't like put yourself in a prison. If that makes any sense, you know? I wouldn't be like so strict about it. I recently moved to LA and I think I hate it. So advice for surviving slash deciding to move. Okay, so I lived in LA for five years. I actually really liked it when I left. It wasn't until after I left that I was like, oh, I like don't really like this that much. I think I also just like grew in a different way and Texas just was like where I'm supposed to be. It's not so like personal to LA. It's more like that just isn't the city for me in the way that like Dallas wouldn't be the city for everyone. You know what I mean? So this was moving at large. Well, actually no, more specific to LA I will say, and I did find this to be really true for myself. When I moved there, I had a friend who was born and raised in like Laguna and had lived in LA, I think at that point for like 10 years. And she said to me, your first year is the honeymoon. Your second year is the like, oh my God, what did I do? Cause all the honeymoon has worn off and you're like hating it. Cause you're like, oh, I actually like live here now. Like, what did I do? I'm freaking out. And like the initial excitement is kind of worn off. You, the people that you like met immediately, you're gonna probably not hang out with them anymore. Just cause it's like, the people that you like meet like immediately and stuff, it's not like your lifelong friends. And then the third year you're like, oh, I built a life here. I actually really love it. And this is great. No, I don't think it has to be a full year of that. But I do find that with moves that I've experienced or that I hear from my friends, I think that that is kind of like the trajectory of a move at first. It's exciting. Cause it's like, oh, this is a honeymoon, but it's amazing. And then it goes to the like, what the hell did I just do? And then you end up at the, you know, this is amazing. I love this. Or maybe you don't, but it was like good. And it served its time. I think you can make anything work and it is a good testament. And it's a good, honestly, like thing to do in life and lesson to learn of like how to make the best of your circumstances, even if you don't necessarily want to be there. So one, I would give it a shot. And I also would try to change your mindset because if you're already thinking, I hate it here, then you are going to hate it there. Cause that's what you're looking for. I think when I move, the reason, even though it's like so not the city for me, I think the reason that I liked it is cause I went in so excited about living in LA. So I was like, oh my God, this is amazing. And whatever. And even though like there are parts of it looking back at like, I don't like now, I didn't even realize it then because my like perspective on it was that I was so happy to be there. So I would try to do that with any move and like really give it your all. Now let's say your lease is up, then I think you can make your decision there. But I would really give it your best effort for no other reason, other than like you don't get any of these days back in your life. So you might as well make the best of it. And really try and give it a second because moving does not, it's not an easy process. Like I think a lot of the time people think, you know, you move there and immediately you're supposed to be obsessed and in love and love it. No, it takes some time. So I would give it time. I would have an open mind and then I would think about it, you know, whenever the lease ends. But I would give it your all while you're there. Like be where you're at and really invest in your life there. Cause also another thing too is like when you're in a city and if you're not trying to invest in like build roots, there's nothing that's going to grow from that. So you're not going to enjoy your time because you didn't do anything there. You know what I mean? So that is just personally what I would do. Like, honestly, even with like Nashville, it's like, I really, I was never going to move there full time. Like I thought in the back of my head there was a possibility, like a small chance. I knew pretty early on I was not going to move there full time. But I still like made the best of it and like had so much fun and like experienced everything that I could. And it was great. I have been loving getting dressed lately, just spending some extra time in my closet, putting outfits together. Even when I'm not going somewhere, I'm just planning outfits. I am in such a outfit planning fashion mood lately. I've been loving everything I've been wearing. I've been doing, you know, some switch ups, getting, you know, some new staple pieces, some bolder things, some classic things, just been loving it. Okay. And if you guys are in that mood as well, I have to tell you guys about Quince because Quince is amazing. It makes high quality wardrobe staples using premium fabrics, like 100% European linen, 100% silk, and organic cotton poplin. They've got lightweight cotton cashmere sweaters that are perfect for the changing seasons and can't miss seasonal colors and prints for spring. Versatile, well-made pieces that make getting dressed simple. I love Quince and Quince works directly with safe, ethical factories and cuts out the middlemen. You're not paying for brand markup or fancy retail stores, just quality clothing. Quince uses 100% European linen. Their cotton poplin is crisp and holds its shape. The gauze is soft without being flimsy. Everything Quince makes is built to hold up season after season. The stitching, the fit, the fabrics, these are pieces that you're gonna reach for over and over. Something that I did this past weekend, actually, I will, actually a couple of weeks ago now that I'm thinking about it. I have no actual like frame of time. Anyway, I really wanted a nice kind of oversized, thick, but not too thick cream cashmere sweater. I had a vision and I wanted to wear it over a skirt, right? I went and I was looking and of course it was really, very expensive online on other stores, okay? And I was like, you know what? Let me check Quince because I love my cashmere sweaters that I have from them. I have like different fits of them that are not really the fit that I'm thinking of and maybe Quince will have it. Went on Quince, they had it. I got it for like under a hundred bucks, which is insane, guys. To get cashmere for that price is crazy, okay? So right now, go to quince.com slash houseguest for free shipping and 365 day returns. That is a full year to wear it and love it and you will. Now available in Canada too. Don't keep settling for clothes that don't last. Go to quince.com, q-u-i-n-c-e.com slash houseguest for free shipping and 365 day returns. quince.com slash houseguest. Next question. Since losing your brother, is it harder to watch friends go through loss? Yes, this is something in grief that I feel like people don't, like maybe don't talk about as much because also it's like not about you so it doesn't really matter. Even if it's not someone, like there's people in my life that have lost like the close people to them this year and that has like completely taken me out but that is a different situation because I like know them and knew them and like love them and it's just like its own thing. But watching people that I love experience loss from people that like I didn't know still affects me so much heavier and everyone's loss is so different. Everyone's grief so differently. You could lose the same person and the way that you deal with grief and loss is so different person to person. For example, my sister and I both lost the same brother but we were just different people. We deal with things differently as like anyone else would. It's not like my sister and I only. It's like that's a common thing. But yeah, it definitely affects me so much more. I think because you have more context of what loss feels like. Well, obviously you can't imagine like what they're feeling because it's just so different. You just have more of an understanding of like what it means. And I think for me, it's like I'm just thinking like six months down the road, 12 months down the road. It like waves so heavily on me and it's not that I didn't care before. Of course I cared, obviously. But when you have context to like what that really means and how permanent it actually is and how just dark the days get, it's definitely a lot harder to like watch people go through it. Of course, it gives you such the greater empathy and understanding. But yeah, oh my God, it hits so much harder. That's something that my friends who have also gone through loss in the past couple years and I talk about a lot. It's like, it just, it like takes me out. It really does. It just, it's so hard. Next question. Tips for being more self-confident. It wouldn't be a Houseguest episode if I didn't quote the great Ed Milad. You build confidence by making promises to yourself and keeping them. So in order to build confidence, you need to make small promises to yourself and keep them. In other words, show up for yourself consistently. It could be something as small as a morning routine. You are, if you say you're gonna wake up at 7 a.m. every single day, you're doing that. I literally say this in every single episode, but you're doing that every single day over time. Like you're trusting yourself that you know that you're gonna do that. That's building confidence. So it's not like looking a certain way, being a certain size, losing a certain amount of weight, you know, achieving X, Y, and Z. It's about making these small promises to yourself and keeping them because you know that you're going to do that. Therefore, you trust yourself. Therefore, you are building confidence. Also a great way to do this is through hobbies. Listen to the grandma hobby episode I posted in January. I go like really into depth on that there. Thoughts on not meeting your childhood best friend of 20 years boyfriend when they've been dating for eight months. Okay, I think if you live in the same city, that's really weird. Like very, very, very bizarre. Also, I think there needs to be more context. I do think if they live in a different place, like that's completely different and changes the entire situation. But I will say just from my experience, I've been in those situations before and never once has the relationship been good. Like, and I don't want to like generalize for every single person, but just from what I've experienced with people that I've been friends with for so long, when someone isn't like sharing their partner and they're kind of like, I just feel like it's not good. Like there's something going on there. That feels weird. Also, I just feel like he should make an effort too. Like she should, of course, but I don't know. Maybe it's just the like, I don't know. I just feel like that's weird. Like your partner should like want to meet your friends. You know what I mean? Like that feels weird. But I would try to make plans. I would just be like, oh my God, would love to meet so-and-so. Like I'll make a dinner reservation. We should go here or like get drinks or something like that. I would just like try to make an effort, but it definitely is weird. What is one small daily habit that you feel has had the biggest impact on how you feel? 1000% without a doubt, morning pages. I talk about this all the time. This is my ideal morning routine though. 6 a.m. to 7, I wake up 6 to 7, I sit by the fire, I do my morning pages on my new Louise Garman journal. That's the best thing ever. Morning pages, by the way, just where you like write for three pages straight, pen to paper, don't take it off. It's the best practice ever. And then I'll do a little bit of reading and then walk for an hour and then go weight train. Also, I will say like reading is a huge thing that has just been so cemented in my daily schedule that I don't even think about doing it anymore. Morning pages is the one that I will like teeter on and off with. I'm like the least consistent with it. And then honestly, like needle pointing too. Like anything that calms my nervous system. Like you just have to find things that calm your nervous system. But whenever I'm doing my morning pages, it gives me time to be like more intentional with my day and my life. And it's just like a couple, it's like 15 minutes a day, but it makes such a huge, massive difference. It really does, the best thing ever. Okay, people have been asking me to show my hinge prompts and like wanting to see them. I don't have my hinge anymore. And I will say I'm really hypocritical with saying you need to have really great hinge prompts because I didn't have hinge prompts like that were amazing. Looking back, like when I'm helping my friends with hinge profiles now, I'm definitely changing it. You need to have a prompt, or I'm definitely doing better on there as I mean, but you need to have a prompt that gives someone something to respond to. And I also think it's nice to have something that's a little bit more niche and specific because it's attracting like the right person. Like if you like some movie that no one really knows about and you put something in there, you're gonna attract someone that might like that movie too or they'll respond. And maybe that's kind of like narrowing in your search. You know what I mean? Mine, I think it was something like the best place for like queso, like something like that. Like also honestly, it'd be like, I love frozen margaritas. Where's the best place, whatever. That's an easy way to like get off the app where they're like, oh, I know this place. Let's go here, quick date done. What I did have on my profile was a photo with Martha Stewart. Now that is why I didn't really like feel the thing. My prompts were not amazing, but I had a photo with Martha Stewart, which really opened the door for so many easy responses. Most of which were like, oh, say hi to Snoop Dogg, like things like that. So I would just make your profile. It needs to be things that are prompting a response, like prompting someone to message you about that situation. And then from there you do the dates. So I don't have it. I know I had something on there, but like queso, I don't know, it was like something random. I don't think my profile by any means was like the best thing ever. So whenever I do my friends now, I'm way better at it. Like I've definitely gotten it down to a little bit of a science. Mine wasn't amazing, but the Martha Stewart picture just made it so much easier. Like seriously, shout out Martha. Next up, are you and your boyfriend living together? Yes, Charlie and I have been living together. If you watch the vlogs, you would know that. It's like been so easy. Honestly, Charlie's the easiest person in the entire world. So like anything would be easy because he's just the easiest person ever. And then the next question is ways you think you've changed in your relationship. I'm way happier now. I'm way more calm. I'm less stressed because I have someone that like I can go to and that helps me with stuff. Like before, even now when I'm like doing several like hosting dinner parties and I was the one who was like in the attic getting everything and moving everything around and whatever, and I did everything. Like I bought houses, I did everything on my own for so long. It's just like such a breath of fresh air that like I don't have to do everything myself. So like I'm less stressed because I have someone that can help me with stuff, which isn't, I don't mean that in like an assistant way. It just means that like I have like a teammate that like does stuff with me. Like I don't have to do everything alone. I have someone that helps. So that makes it like a big difference. Also, another thing too that I'm sure has to do with Charlie but I've always been like such a huge decorator obviously for my home, but also for Christmas. But I wasn't a big decorator when it came to like any other holiday. And now I'm like, oh my God, I can't wait to decorate for Easter. And it's like, okay, I've never decorated for Easter in my life, but like now, and like that isn't something that like Charlie brings up for like once. I mean, he is so down for it and like is excited about anything that I'm excited about, but it's not something he's like bringing up, which is like suddenly I'm like, can't wait to decorate for Easter. And I'm like, okay. Like literally when I was looking at this before I started recording, I was like looking at the McKenzie Child's Easter stuff. I was like, need that bunny, you know? So those are just a couple of things. Also my family is over the moon, thrilled, excited, loves Charlie. I'll text my mom something like I'm kidding about something annoying Charlie did like as a joke. And she'll be like, oh my God, he is just perfect. I'm like, okay, anyway. I have the worst brain fog. And honestly, my afternoon slumps are just rough, okay? That is why I'm so excited to tell y'all about Nature's Sunshine Green Edge. We've talked about it before. It is amazing. It combines hand harvested yerba mate with powerful nootropics to support focus, memory and cognitive performance without the crash. I am always trying to, you know, maybe not have a coffee at three, 4 p.m. And that is what I feel like I need to do. Like when I hit my afternoon slump, my, you know, go-to has always been like, you know, another iced coffee, but then it makes my anxiety worse. And then I'm up way too late and it doesn't even really help with my focus. It's like, you know, I'm just gonna crash, right? The brain edge stuff is unbelievable. It enhances focus and clarity. It supports memory and learning, delivers smooth, sustained energy, which is the best thing, especially as opposed to like caffeine with, you know, the jitters and the crashes. It is sourced with purpose. Yerba mate is wild harvested by indigenous communities in the South American rainforest. A powerful ingredient with a powerful origin. It's made by Nature's Sunshine, which is a trusted brand with over 50 years of experience sourcing the most pure and potent ingredients from nature. Don't fight through feeling foggy and lethargic. Ignite your mental performance with Brain Edge. Nature's Sunshine is offering 20% off your first order plus free shipping. Go to naturesunshine.com and use the code houseguest at checkout. That is code houseguest at naturesunshine.com. How do you deal with people being judgmental of your relationship timing? I really don't. I think that, the first thing is like, I don't in two ways. One, there really aren't a lot of people. I think people just love Charlie so much that that's not really a thing. Like on the internet, in my real life, people do just love Charlie so much. I think if there was anyone in my real life that was saying things like that, maybe it would bother me a little bit more, but like literally no one says that, thinks that at all. People are like so on board and no one feels that it's rushed at all. And then I don't really see it on the internet, but I think that's because people like love Charlie so much. But again, I think it wouldn't bother me anyway because I'm so confident in it. Like a lot of the think time online when, and this isn't always, this is not a blanket statement. Sometimes you just catch me on the wrong day, but most of the time when someone is like leaving hate, the only time it bothers me is when I feel like there's slight truth to it, if that makes sense. So like that is not one of those things that would bother me because I don't feel like there's slight truth to it. You know, you can catch me on the wrong day and like something could just set me off. That's pretty rare. But for the most part, if something's bothering you, it is because you're slightly insecure about it and I'm not like insecure about that. So I think maybe that's it, I don't know. Honestly, people just love Charlie though. So I think that's probably the right answer. Okay, how to find your identity after grief and not wanting to change your life every month. I feel like I'm, you know like the memes when you're, or the memes, do I feel like, I sound like I'm like a millennial or something. You know the memes when you're like, no, I'm still doing it, the videos, whatever. When it's you on Pinterest at 3 a.m., like I'm gonna change everything. I feel like I've done that so many times that I've kind of arrived to where I wanna be at. So I'm not trying to change everything. I definitely was feeling like I wanted to like go to the, I wanted something good to happen in my life for so long. And of course there's like the small good things, but I just like needed something good to happen and I feel like it has happened. So I'm not really wanting to change my life every month, but I feel like I felt that honestly before. I mean, I've, the first big loss I had, I was 19. So I feel like I felt that way through the three major losses like in my 20s outside of grief as well. So I was always wanting to do that. Also when it comes to identity, I think you just have to understand that like who you are as a person before loss is, that's another thing you grieve. It's like, you're never gonna be that person again. And like, that doesn't have to be a bad thing necessarily. There's definitely ways that I feel like I'm jaded that I don't love that I'm trying to work through, which I talked about a little bit in like the 28 lessons I've learned in 28 years. But I think you have to just be okay with changing and growing. And like, honestly, people will tell you that even when you have a baby, they're like, you're never gonna be that girl again. Like who you are is different and it's so much better. And I feel like, well, we go through that a lot in life. So like you probably were never gonna be that person forever anyway. You can grow and become someone else that you're proud of, like a different version of that and using all the things that you're going through like for a benefit. But I wouldn't put a lot of pressure on yourself and I wouldn't put a timeline. I would just be open and give yourself grace is what I would say. Because I don't think that there's any like wrong way for me with stuff. I felt like the only wrong way to deal with it would be to do nothing. And that's only because that's what I know my brother would say. Like, so like for me, that's the situation, but I don't, everyone is so case by case. So I would give yourself grief. There's really not like one right answer, but I think like taking it day by day, the best piece of grief advice I ever got, and this is something I tell my friends all the time, because it was so overwhelming to think like, you know, 50, 60 years down the road. And that's all I would think about initially. And my therapist was telling me like, you only have to make it through like day by day. Like think about sometimes it's minute by minute, hour by hour and like the initial like loss. And she was saying, you know, you have to get through like one day at a time. And that really helped me because it was a lot less overwhelming. So I would focus more on that. I always say develop hobbies because they're the best thing ever. But just recognizing that you won't be the same person. That's not necessarily a bad thing. Like you will probably grow into someone that you're like, I like who I am now better, but I would hope that I could always say that. Like I would hope that I'm always like growing and getting better in doing those things and like being intentional. So I would just be open. And honestly, if you want to change your life, like just try it out. Like you can always go back to like where you were. I think like trying new things and adding different, like I don't see the harm in that. Even when people are like annihilating people online or like changing job paths all the time, whatever. Like I do think there's something to be said about choosing something and sticking to it. But I also think it's a good thing. I think it takes a lot of courage to try something new. So I also think that that should be like applauded in a way. But anyway, I don't think I gave the best answer for that. Those are just kind of like, I don't think I have the answer, but those are just like the first thoughts that I had that came to mind. So hopefully that was helpful at all. I think we're going to do one more question. Okay, people were asking for the details on my new Louise Carmen journal. I have, I forget what it's called, the medium size. I got my charms on the side from them. I ordered it. I have just a blank journal. Honestly, I'll do a full TikTok video on this because it's not really that helpful here. I do love it. Like I find that I'm writing in my journal like so much more because of the way that it's structured. Like you don't, of course, need to spend like that money on a Louise Carmen. I'm someone who journals every day. So like it actually was something that I was like down to. It was my Christmas present to myself too, but it was something that I was like down to invest in. But overall, I really love it. And I was worried that I was going to buy it and it would just be like another journal that I don't touch, you know, but no, I like love that thing. So it's been fabulous. I will film a full video for you guys and I'll put it in like YouTube vlogs and stuff too. But anyway, I hope you guys enjoyed this nice little catch up episode. I love you guys so much and I will talk to you in my next video. Bye.