Jon Lovitz on SNL, Adam Sandler Movies and How to Write Sketch Comedy - AGT PODCAST

It was your, it was your idol growing up. Well, I wanted to be Willie Mays. I did. I wanted to be a black baseball player from like, I was eight to 15. And then when I was 15, I went, Oh, I can't be a black baseball player. Today's podcast is brought to you by Babbel. Get up to 55% off your subscription when you go to babbel.com slash Nash. What's up guys. Welcome back to the all good things podcast today. I am sitting here, guys. I bring you the best guests, the funniest people in the world. Today is a legend. Am I, am I coming in too, too hot? And no, as long as you just stay there. Uh, this is one of the funniest people I've ever seen. Uh, from, uh, he's from Saturday Night Live. He's from tons of Adam Sandler movies, a long list of credits. I mean, my favorite stuff is when you're on Saturday Night Live, Mr. John Lovett's joining us today. John, tell me you created your most famous thing at the groundlings, the pathological liar character, right? That, that came from the groundlings, not from SNL. A friend of mine, a girl, and she goes, I like a guy with a fat wallet. And I go, well, my dad just had 15 oil wells come in. And I go, well, I am a pathological. And she'll, yeah, right. And I go, well, I am a pathological liar. And then we had to do a sketch in the groundlings, the Sunday company, I got this Sunday company. Where are you? It's called panel. So you'd have a host and then six people. Yeah. Like a talk show. And the six people, they go, you, you each create a character and your name and the first thing you're and introduce yourself, and then the audience will ask you questions. So I go, so that I was like, hello, I'm Tommy. So it was like Flanagan, a member of pathological liars. My name is Tommy Flanagan and I'm a member of pathological liars. Anonymous and the president of that organization. And then, and then someone goes, how long have you been lying? And I go, and I thought it'd be funny to go, what are you talking about? They go, you said you're a liar. I'm like, no, I didn't. I just start denying that he even said it. Right. And Robin Schiff was in the group. Robin wrote what's Romy and Michelle's high school. Yeah. Robin was in and she pointed out to me, she says, John, you set it up. Perfect. Now you just got to stay in character. Answer anything. Right. Oh, I did. She goes, yes. She goes, let's try it. Like, all right. She goes, all right. Uh, what's your favorite sport? I go, and I, you know, I do the look like, uh, bowling. And it was just funny, you know, cause you know, he's like, it's so random. And then, uh, and then I wrote a monologue of it. I got in the main company and in the September of 84 and then January of 85. They were doing a new show and that's when I would do my liar character, the monologue, which was, I thought of a guy, you know, like AA alcoholics anonymous, which isn't funny, but you'd hear, you know, they go, I'm Bob. I'm an alcoholic. Here's my story. So I thought, well, what if it was pathological liars anonymous? And, and the guy got up and told his story, you know, and then I go, but then he would just start lying about it. So that was the monologue I wrote and half the time it worked. Half the time it didn't. Oh, really? So there were times when you go up and do it and it wouldn't work. Yeah. And then one day I had bits. If they didn't get the first, the joke, the first joke, the setup and the name and the intro that it didn't work, but it always worked on SNL. Yeah. Right. Well, what happened was we did it on a one Sunday in March. I have like 20 messages on my answering machine. Congratulations. All from people in the groundlings, but I don't know what, for what the no one's saying, I don't know what they're talking about. So on Monday I called Tom Maxwell's from like North Carolina or South North. I think I go, Tom, what's going on? Everybody's congratulating me for what he goes, we're going on the tonight show. I go, who he goes, you. They want you to do your live piece and Tom and, uh, and, uh, uh, uh, Don Woodard and Mindy Sterling and Kate Benton do the white man's rap and you and Tim stack do the truck driver's piece. I go, when he goes Thursday, I go Thursday. He goes, yeah, we're both screaming. So now you're on Carson. I used to tell the truth, but then one day I, I told a lie and I got away with it. Yeah. Well, my parents had a brother that they'd never met. They got mad at me for not telling him sooner. Three days later. Amazing. If you're on Johnny Carson, you hit, you'd have a career. And sure. But I was so nervous, you know, and then we go to the, and then we got for rehearsal, that studio was like 380 people. The groundlings is 99 seats. So it just looked enormous. It looked like the rafters went to this guy. So I'm out there. And I said, the director, where do I look? He goes, just play it to camera, which was great advice because that's for the audiences, a lot of comedians sits. They don't go look to the camera. Joe Coy used to open for me. He got the tonight show. I go, Joe, play to the camera. So then I watched me look, they, they everywhere, but in, because they said don't, I go, no, you idiot. I go, that's where the audience is. Yeah. We're in the makeup room. Yeah. And morally safer is from 60 minutes is interviewing Jack lemon. It was going to be on the show. Wait, where's Johnny? I don't understand. He wasn't in there. Well, he has his own makeup guy. So we're in there and I remember thinking, oh my God, this is that world where all these people live, right? Cause it was just another world. And, and morally safer said to Jack lemon. So you've been, you've been an actor 40. What have you learned? I've been actor 40 years. What have you learned? And Jack Lemon said, I've learned, keep it simple. And I'm like, I have my answer. Oh, thank God. You know? Okay. Just keep it simple. Yeah. So I went out and I did it and I just looked in that camera and sold it straight ahead. And at the end I go, so if you're out there listening, you have a problem with lying, give us a call. But in my mind, I'm thinking, so if you're watching this right now, you need an actor and then call me. What's it like to go on, um, like Adam Sandler sets. You've been on a ton of those. It's really fun. It's the way it feels. It's just fun. And it's, I think it's the way you should always feel on a movie, which is all I have to do is be funny. And they're really appreciative that he's very appreciative that you're there. You don't audition. They just call you and say, well, it's, this is your part, right? Right. On dish at this point. Well, there must be some things you have to audition for. Well, I can tell you ever since I only got one job since I got Saturday night live that I auditioned for, which was a Mr. Destiny and a Jim Belushi. It's kind of like, it's a wonderful life, but I play his best friend. There's a dramatic scene where I'm on a ledge and I'm going to jump. So they wanted to hear me do it. But other than that, I've never gotten a job since I got to SNL that I auditioned for. Because I go in and they already know who I am. It's just a waste. Yes. It's I go and I, they go, I go, what do you want to know? If I can act, they go, I, I've done like 60 movies and watch him. Right. Have you ever tried, you know, it's, it's in different characters. It's just a waste. They already, if you're unknown, I get it. But once you're at a certain point, you know, you're known and then you go, well, do you want me or do you don't want me? And you're a very specific thing too. You don't, you, you're, you're reading everything as John Lovett's basically. I mean, that's, no, that's, but that's what they want a lot. I don't, I don't have, I do can do any accents and voices and characters and I don't have to do it the same as me. Was there ever a push by your agent to try to get you into dramas and make you an Oscar contender and things like that? You know, people say, look, I did a movie where it was a dramatic, uh, uh, casino Jack and, uh, I had a great part. And as it starts, Kevin Spacey, it's about the lobbyist, Jack Abramoff. So you watch that and you tell me, Oh, we're really good actor, but that's cause the director left all my scenes in, you know, and, um, you know, what's funny is about that is they go, don't you need drama and show everybody? I'm like, no, I go, I don't care. Show who and prove what? And I go, everyone that says comedy is harder than drama, right? Yeah. Well, if it's harder, you think I can't do drama. I'm going out of, out of my way to be funny. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So they go, yeah, but you just stand there and you're funny. I go, well, I'm not just standing there. It's, it's a choice and I know, and it's a reaction to, it's playing the scene and what would I do? And if I'm trying to get a laugh, what would you do? And sometimes it's funnier just to, just to turn your head and just stare at the person forever and not move. And it's called deadpan. And, and, um, I know what I'm doing. It was your, it was your idol growing up. Well, I wanted to be Willie Mays. I did. I wanted to be a black baseball player from like, I was eight to 15. And then when I was 15, I went, Oh, I can't be a black baseball player. Do you still watch baseball? I do. Yeah. What's your daily, what's your day to day? Like, like you're accomplished. I wanted to be Woody Allen when I was 13. And so you want to be Woody Allen, take the money and run. And you want to be comedian like him. And I used to do his routines in my college dorm, but I ended up getting to make a movie with him. Which one was through, uh, it's called small time crooks. And I have one scene in the movie, just the two of us. I loved it. And we were so in sync. Yeah. Does he not feel this? Yeah. This is like the new team and it didn't turn out to be the new, no, but he couldn't have been nicer to me. You know, he knew how much it meant to me. So that probably was your, your ultimate then. Oh yeah. More than Lauren, more than, Oh, to be in a movie with Woody Allen. Oh yeah. Yeah. I never thought I'd be on Saturday night life. Now people go to the growlings and get on it. I just thought like Mike said, you know, get on stage, get seen and get work. And I knew that was a good place to get seen, but I never imagined I'd be on Saturday night live. As it was, it was a ridiculous idea. What was that audition like for you? What did you do in the audition? I did four characters. First I met, uh, Al Franken and Tom Davis were producing that year. And then I met, I used to work there. He did. Yeah. I worked there for a couple of years as an assistant when I was there. No, it was after you left. I was there when like Will Ferrell was there. Okay. Yeah. So I did that. And then, then they came to see me in the growlings and I was doing this master thespian sketch and nobody was laughing except for Al. Oh really? Yeah. And I thought, Oh, thank God that Saturday night live guys left. Oh wow. I would tell Al that. And he always started laughing. He thought that was funny. And then met Lauren. Then they, and then it kept going and they, and then they flew us to New York and we had to audition in front of a bunch of people and they put us on tape. And then I came back, it was nerve wracking as hell. Don't kid yourself. And then came back on a Sunday and I go, Oh, I'm not gonna, I go, they go, it's one out of nine men they're going to pick. I go, uh, or maybe it was a Friday. It came back. I go, eh, no way. Out of nine, one out of nine, one out of nine. Me. No. Was Phil Hartman already on the show? No, no. I'm like, eh, they're not going to pick. One out of nine meet now. And then on Thursday, Lorraine Newman called me, shows you got it. I'm like, what? Wow. She was, you got to show it. And I was already thinking, all right, I'll just go back to the groundlings, create new characters, keep going, you know? And then I call and they go, well, we don't know if you got it. They shouldn't have told you that. So then I called Charles Grodin. I said, Hey, Lorraine just called me and said, I got the show. And then, then they said, well, we don't know yet. I goes, and now I don't know if I got it or not, because you want me to call and find out, I go, well, yeah, could you, would you mind? He goes, sure. So then he called me back five minutes later. He goes, you got it. And I go, I got it. He goes, yeah. And I went, oh, and I drove down to the groundlings and, and my teacher, Randy Bennett, who's really, he was teaching a class. I walk in, I go, Randy, I got it. He went, what? I got it. He goes, you got it. I'll go. And he started sobbing and hugging me. He got that right. I've got, you know, I mean, it was huge. And it was, um, Tom Maxwell is really funny. He goes, it's like clockwork every 10 years, you know, because Lorraine Newman got it, and then 10 years later I got it. So I was, I'm the second person from the groundlings they got on the show. Oh, wow. You get into SNL and is that really competitive? And is it super hard? Or do you get stuff on right away? Well, I did. I had like three sketches on a week, but I was there at seven in the morning writing, right? Normally take two weeks to write a sketch. And I was writing three a night. Uh, it was exhausting, but, um, well, there was, uh, my first year it was, uh, Randy Quaid and Terry Sweeney and Anthony Michael Hall, Robert Downey Jr. And then they, oh, I was supposed to do weekend update. And then, and then a week later they hired Dennis to do it. That's a whole nother story. And then, uh, Joan Cusack, Denitra Vance and Nora Dunn were the women. Oh, that's so funny. And then the next year they kept Dennis and I and Nora. They got rid of everybody. Yeah. And then they go, we want people you work well with. So, I mean, I, I was sad that they got rid of all those people because I liked them all. They're all extremely talented. You know, and it was like, we were working together for a year. But those were all, that's funny. You, I, well, there are more actors and then they said, we want to get more people that the difference was the cast the next year was they go, we want people you work well with. So they got Phil and, and, and, and Dana Carvey got it and he got Kevin Nealon and then, and the Jan hooks and Victoria Jackson and Dennis. So everybody knew. So I'd worked with Jan on this other sketch show on the Playboy channel called 29 minutes. I knew Jan Phil, I knew from the growlings by then we'd become like best friends, one of my best friends. And then, um, and Dan and Kevin and Dennis all knew each other from stand up and Victoria knew that, you know, and I knew Nora, of course. And so we all knew each other, but the difference was everybody was closer in age in their late twenties, early thirties. And everybody had a comedy background or sketch comedy. So, you know, did you like that a lot? That was the difference. Did you like that a lot better than the cast before, which was more actory? No, I loved everybody before. I mean, I, I thought that they were doing great work. Well, look how talented they are. What was Robert Downey Jr. Like back then? Um, well, he was 20, you know? Right. But he was, uh, I, he would do these poems. He would make up these poems and he goes, you want to hear one? I go, sure. And he would do it. And, um, it was, uh, it was like genius. I thought, I said, you're a genius. Really? I'd never heard language used like that. Oh yeah. He was brilliant. And a very, very nice guy. Really nice. We became good friends back then. Yeah. Um, and these poems, they weren't for SNL. They were just stuff. He was writing stuff. He just did for his own amusement, you know, and I actually, he'd worked before he could help me get my accountant. You know, I hadn't, I never worked, you know? And yeah. And, um, he, he was great. They're all nice. Anthony Isis, Joan was great. Randy Quaid was great. All super nice. I read somewhere that you likened SNL to being a, an athlete in terms of now you look back on it and it's kind of like, Oh wow. I can't believe I did that. You still feel that way or. Oh yeah. I can't believe I, I can't. Yeah. I see the show now. I go, oh yeah, I was on that, but I just visited recently after that's night show and it's like going home. It's I just, it's not foreign to me. It's like I belong here. I'm part of it. How did you learn to sing the national anthem so good? Well, I always wanted to sing and my dad wasn't gonna be a singer, so he's always singing and playing music in the house and I could, I don't know. When I was a kid, I could sing and he goes, you really haven't met your voice. I go, I don't know. I just like to sing, you know, but I'm working on shows now where I'm going to, where I sing, like a, like a, like a real, like a funny, but singing like a show where you play a singer. No, no. Where I'm me. I'm oh, you're me. You're yeah. Variety. No, like, like, uh, there's nightclubs and you sing in a nightclub as a singer like that, it'll still be funny though. I see a live show. A live show. Yeah. Live singing. I still be funny. I'm not, you know, I know, I know. I've seen the funny, but, but I want to sing and, uh, there's, I'm working on it with this guy, Randy Waldman who Kenny G, um, I know Kenny forever. Anyway, Kenny said, Kenny, I want to do music shows. So he introduced me to Randy Waldman. Yeah. If you love Randy Walden, he's worked everybody. He's Barbra Streisand's personal accompanist in her shows and this for 36 years, he's worked with Michael Jackson, Ray Charles, Frank Sinatra. I mean, everybody, right. And he wants to do it. And so, so I picked the songs and, and kind of the style I want to do them. And we arranged them and is that what you arranged it? And then I got to learn all the songs. Is that what you did over new year's when you were performing live in Vegas or was that just standup? No, that, oh, that's, I do stand up at the, uh, it's like a residency once a month at the laugh factory at the Tropicana hotel in Las Vegas, go to the website for tickets and yeah, plug it. When did you have a show? This, I was just there this weekend. Oh, you were, you have another one in February coming up? The, I think this, yeah, the 16th, 17th and 18th. What's your live show? Like straight standup or do you sing or? Well, yeah, I do stand up and sing at the end. If there's time I get an hour. It's hard. Cause I have a lot of material. So, you know, you're going to cut stuff and fit it in. But yeah, I sing at the end. You like Vegas? Uh, yeah, I do. I mean, I don't live there, but it's fun to come in and out. Today's podcast is brought to you by Babbel. Guys, let me tell you something. Remember in high school and you had a chance to learn a second language and you blew it off or you didn't really pay attention and you wish you had. Now as an adult, I wish I could speak a second language. Well, that's why I love Babbel, today's sponsor. Now, thanks to Babbel, the language learning app that sold more than 10 million subscriptions. There's an addictively fun and easy way to learn a new language. Whether you'll be traveling abroad, connecting in a deeper way with family or just having some free time. Babbel teaches bite-sized language lessons that you'll actually use in the real world. You know, I live in Southern California, so that's really nice. And that's why Babbel is so great. So you can feel like a smart person. It really, really helps. And it makes you feel good. I'm all about enriching my life in any way that I can. And this is a great way to do it. Babbel's 15 minute lessons make it the perfect way to learn a new language on the go. Other language learning apps use AI for their lesson plans. But Babbel lessons are created by over a hundred language experts. Their teaching method has been scientifically proven to be effective. With Babbel, you can choose from 14 different languages, including Spanish, French, Italian, and German. Plus Babbel's speech recognition technology helps you to improve your pronunciation and accent. In addition to lessons, you can access podcasts, games, videos, stories, and even live classes. Plus it comes with a 20 day, listen to that guys, a 20 day money back guarantee. Right now, get up to 55% off your subscription. That's babbel.com slash Nash for up to 55% off your subscription. Babbel language for life. And my thanks to Babbel for sponsoring this podcast. This is the internet's most asked questions about you. Really? Okay. John Lovett's most asked questions. Let's see what the first question is. What is John Lovett's doing now? Am I doing your podcast? Everyone says that. Well, it's true. Ooh, what is your net worth? I would, well, you know, it's not accurate on the internet. And of course, you know, it's not polite to talk, ask that question. But I'll say Jeff Bezos called me last week for a loan. So that gives you any idea what movie did John Lovett's play in? I'm not sure. I understand the question. What movies am I in? Well, I've done a lot of movies over, I think 60 or I don't know. But I was the famous ones was, um, big in a league of their own. The Penny Marshall directed. Oh, that was a big movie. It's hard. Tom Hanks. And then I did, um, a lot of Adam Sandler movies. Yeah. He's been great to me. The wedding singer, little Nicky. You get, you still get paid from the wedding singer. You get checks. Residuals. Yeah. Every actor gets residuals. Yeah. On a movie though. You still get, you still get that money, right? Like if it plays on Netflix. You get residuals from everything. If it's playing anywhere. Yeah. Every job. Yeah. What show has John Lovitz played in? Do people not have known how to talk to these questions? It's like, they don't even know who I am. What he played in. How is it that they're asking that question? So they know who I am, but they just know the name, but they don't know anything. The actor who played or who I was or anything. Do you know the name? John Lovitz? Yes. What's he do? What have I played in Saturday night live? Where is he today? It's not the same as what am I doing now? Well, maybe you could do this more right here. Why don't you answer this more existentially? Like a little, maybe we can go a little bit deeper with you. I'm in a good place. You are. Look, seriously, I'm 65. Yeah. So when I say that I feel like I'm lying, like it's technically true, but I don't feel any different than when I was in, I don't know, 13. I don't feel any different. I feel the same way. I'm 49 and I feel the same when I was 25. So physically you don't feel any different. Yeah. I was on SNL 28. I don't feel any different. And time, it just keeps another day goes by. So I, but I, it's not easy, uh, living this, staying alive. No, when I was younger, you know, people would make fun of old people and I go, what are you doing? I go, you know, you're making, you're going to make, you're making it bad for yourself later on. Yeah. Realize that you live, you're going to be old one day. I go, don't. And so you, you feel the same. And then, and then you look in the mirror and you go, what did my dad said? He goes, I look in the mirror. Who's that old man looking back? You don't feel any different. My mom would say, that's the secret of getting older. You never feel any different. Yeah. It's just, time goes on and then, and then, you know, unfortunately your friends pass away and people, you know, it's horrible. Yeah. So I just appreciate, I appreciate I every day, every night I go, thanks you God for another day. Are you, a lot of comedians are like, you know, depressed and happy, you know, up and down. Are you like that? Are you, are you pretty happy guy? No, listen, you seem like you're pretty happy guy. That's just a bunch of crap. You know, it's people that analyze, uh, comedians and, and when they say that it's people that aren't funny. Okay. And, and they analyze comedy and they analyze comedians. And so they're really, I don't know why, why it is, but I have friends. They go, Oh, you're a comedian. I'm funny. I go, okay, great. I don't meet a dentist and go, I can fill a tooth. I go, you know, I'm not competing with you. Right. But the, the, but they always want to go, I'm funny too. You know? And then I go, all right. Yeah. They go, do you want to hear a joke? I go, sure. So they start telling it to me and I go, and dah, dah, dah, dah, dah. They go, you know it already? I go, yes. Yeah. It's all I do. Well, it's, there's a lot of dramatic actors. There aren't a lot of comedians. So people are just, they want, and what does a comedian do? It makes people laugh. He brings joy. So now you got these people have no sense of humor. We want to feel better about themselves who are miserable. Go. Well, you know, it's funny. It's the sad clown. It's the mask behind the set. You know, it's a bunch of crap. They're no more happy or sad than anyone else. You know, everyone's living their life, but they, they say stuff like that. And, and I think they're just jealous, you know? And they just, they make that stuff up. No, I'm talking about comedians that like I've known over the years that are like, I just think it's some people are depressed. I don't think it's every comedian. I think you can generalize. You're a happy guy. Yeah. I enjoy my life. Good. If something sad happens, do I get sad? Yes. You know, like anybody, but are they go, this is the other thing they do. They're not a comedian. They go, you know, they go, comedy is, is that the juxtaposition of tragedy over time, comedy, the truth is funnier than, and they have all these things, the way they analyze it. Now you ask any comedian. So when you think of something, write a joke, do you go like, okay, when did it happen? Okay. Is it three months? Yeah. We three years ago. Yeah. We need to wait another year on that one. You know, no, no comedian thinks like that. Yeah. They just don't. They just think is this funny. And the other thing they do is, is they just look at things differently. And they, and really what they do is it's like, they, it's like a, um, it's really like a kid, you know, a kid you'll see kids are really funny. Why? Because they take everything. They don't, they don't know, understand nuance. So they take everything literally. And then they answer your question literally, and they don't know what they're saying. And then they go, why are you laughing? Right. They go, what? What's funny. Cause they taking it literally. Well, that's what comics do. Yeah. They use a joke as you have a setup and then you take it, you go the other direction, uh, then you expect, you know, what do you think about comedy on the internet and stuff? Do you, do you watch Tik TOK and stuff like that? I do. You'd like all that. You like making like some of it, most of it that they trying to be funny. It's, it's just not, do you like making videos on your phone and posting them like that? Is that fun for you? Or do you not care? No, I haven't done that. Well, you made the George Santos one. I saw it. That's the only time I've done that. That's the only one. Yeah. Oh wow. That was good. But, uh, I mean, I mean, what's I'll tell you that there are certain things that, that comics do that's funny, but, but the main, when they go, the truth is some funny there. I mean, to me, it's when it's just, you can't, I don't, it's like slapstick humor, but it's real. It's like, there's a guy in the orchestra and he's playing a timpani and whoever put it up is a good sense. Human. He goes, this guy had one job and you show the guy hitting the timpani drum. Right. And then he goes to hit it a second time and it goes flying out of his hand and hit some lady in the head. Harp. Right. It's hysterical. Yeah. But that was like a real life. Yeah. That's funny. That's what's tough about comedy now is that she walked off and she was, she walked off. She did. I mean, if she really got hurt bad, it's not funny, but it, but it just looks at it's hysterical where they have some woman roller skating. It's just for a second. And then in a hallway and I, and she goes right into a glass case, you know, kaboom, you know, and you go, so you think it's funny when people get hurt? And I go, yeah, some of it, but a lot of it, the people are, they're trying to act out a sketch and it's, it's, you know, it's just, you spend a lot of time watching stuff on the internet like that. You go into like a hole and I watch. Yeah. You know, it's kind of addicting to watch one video and then keep going. And eventually I go, I got to get off this toilet, you know, but I think it's funny. Okay. We're going to do like a rapid fire, a bunch of rapid fire questions and then yeah, we'll be done. Okay. Ready? This is rapid fire. John, my short answers. Yeah. You just got to answer quickly. Okay. Ready? Favorite SNL host. I like John Lithgow. A bench warmers or a league of their own league of their own Margarita salt or no salt? No salt burritos or fajitas. Neither ever made love to three people at once. Do I count myself? No, no, no. Uh, favorite SNL skit you ever did. Probably a massive. Well, there's two mass thespian. I know one, but one more mission with Phil Hartman. What's that one. It was, um, a spoof of these 40 movies. That was Phil's favorite sketch that he ever did. Yeah. And I'm a, I'm a head of a studio and Phil's an actor in a, and I got to let him go and it's a funny sketch. Yeah. My favorite. We rehearsed it a lot. We learned our lines. You know, they don't learn their lines. A lot of them showing you. If you don't know your lines, you can penny. You can't do the sketch and Penny Marshall. She befriended me after my first show. She has learned your lines. I go, you can tell I'm reading the card. She goes, yes. Cause I thought my eyes, I'd never used cue cards in it. And it was the first time. And so I thought my eyes, I could like look at it real quick and look back. She's, I can see her eyes darting. I go, crap. You can see it. That's funny though. But she was right. I would learn my line. So that's not a lot. Most people wouldn't learn their lines, but I did. It was, I, it was a lot of work, but the lines changed. Don't they? From dress to air. Yeah, they do. But you still got to know it. You got to be able to play the sketch. So you have like an hour before 1130 to get those notes from 1030 to 11. And then you're on at 1130. So you only have a half an hour to get those lines, right? Right. So I would, I would write. It's insane. That is like, I would take notes on the last page of my script and write all the scenes that were in and make a line and write all the notes and then, and the order it was in and, and, um, and then, uh, right before I'd go out, uh, you have a, uh, a dresser, you know, your son, a lot of time you have two minutes to make a major change, so you're out under the rafters changing and I, so I would, and you'd have a makeup person and a, and a person, a costumer as your team. So I'd say, I'd say to them, uh, just, I go in the sketches over. I I'd say, which is true. I go, I'm not going to remember what's next. I don't have a clue. Just forget it. So just, I'll come off and just grab me and just take my hand and go, we're going here and, and you'd plan where you would go and tell me what the next sketch is. Cause I go, I'll have no idea because I don't remember because you're so into the thing, you know, you can't remember cause they changed the order of the show. I don't remember. And so then I would do it and I go, and then I have my notebook. I go, let me see my notes. They were here and they'd have it. And I would look at my notes for this and then go out cause you couldn't, you couldn't remember all your notes. You know, I'd have to write them down. Uh, what's your handicap? My swing. Tennis or pickleball? Tennis. Are you kidding me? Pickleball is for people that can't play tennis and they don't want to move. Is your house worth over 10 million? Which one? Has anyone ever asked you to officiate a wedding? Yes. Did you do it? No. Why not? I don't want to do that. Was it like a big fanny? Was it like a big fanny of yours that like wanted you there? My agent. He asked you? Yeah. My standard agent. Really? If somebody asked me to officiate their wedding, I would do it. Uh, favorite rabbi story. I mean, a real story or a joke. Either one. I'll tell you these rabbis, two of my friend's kids had bar mitzvahs and the stuff the rabbi said was the most ridiculous things I ever heard. Yeah. They go, one of them, it was a double bar mitzvah, two boys on a Saturday. So, you know, they're working for three years and learning Hebrew and working their butts off. They do the big speech and the rabbi goes, and now we're going to get the non bar mitzvah boys. So he talks to one kid. Do you play any sports? Yeah. What do you play? Soccer. That's not a Jewish sport. Shut up. Like, what are you criticizing the kid? And the kid, do you play any instruments? Yeah. What do you play? Saxophone. The saxophone. That's not a Jewish instrument. We should play the violin. What is this guy from 1870? Yeah. Idiot criticizing these kids on this big day. Ever make love to a supermodel? Whose question? Who's asking you? Yeah, I'm asking. You know the answer to that. I don't. Don't you? I don't know. Yes. Favorite song of all time. We can work it out by the Beatles. That's a good one. The Canyon or the 101? The Canyon. I've got a romantic date in Malibu. Where do I go? Joffries. All right, guys. Listen, my thanks to John Lovitz for coming here. John, thank you so much. This is awesome. John, where can we find you? I do a show called a game show every day called Funny You Should Ask. Yeah, there you go. Which is like Hollywood Squares on TV, and it's just comedians telling jokes. It's fun to do. And then I do. Oh, I saw that. It's like a Byron Allen show, right? Yeah, Byron Allen. And then I do Las Vegas every month. Great. Yeah, at the Laugh Factory at the Tropicana. And then, oh, I'm all over YouTube and stuff. I've done and then Netflix. There's some movies. Well, there you go. I'm on Twitter at real John Lovitz. You tweet much? A little bit. Yeah. You ever get in trouble on there? No, but, you know, Twitter, it's kind of ridiculous because you can, I go watch. All right. One word and people go nuts. Right. So I go watch. So I go, all right, watch this. I wrote vaccination, vaccinated with a question mark. Yeah, that's all I wrote. Vaccinated. And every vaxxer and anti-vaxxer and this, and they're going on and on. I go, look at this. It's ridiculous. Yeah. It's just, I, I didn't even say whether they, and I did get vaccinated, but they go, should you, or shouldn't you, you know, I'm, I'm not telling people to do it or not at first. I thought they really should. Now I don't know, but. Right. Guys, listen, thank you so much. My thanks to John. Go look for him everywhere on Netflix, Hulu, all his movies with Adam Sandler and go check out his new game show. And that's like how he, Howie Mandel does that game show too, right? You guys like all get together. He does it a lot. Yeah. And he does it with you. Louis Anderson did all of them besides me, but sadly passed away. Do you, do you tape that? You said you do that every day. It airs every day. We tape like six shows a day, twice a month. And what's it called? Funny. You should ask. Funny. You should ask. Go check out John's show. Funny. You should ask John. Thank you so much for being here. Thank you for editing this. John, you, this, you're definitely our weirdest guest. Huh? You're definitely our weirdest guest. Weirdest? Yes. Weird. Why? I don't know. Oh, you mean I'm the only guest with a brain? I'm also probably your smartest guest. Are you smart? Do you have like a high IQ? You do. Well, maybe that's why you're slumming. Albert Einstein begged me to teach him about physics. Okay. Goodbye, everybody.