Anna & Jamie ‣ their story [my Oxford year]

Oh my god, it's Professor Stein. She's my hero. She's the reason I came here. Terrible news, I'm afraid. I've just been named Head of Graduate Studies, which means I'm far too important to be teaching you lot, this term at least. Can I get two large cod, mushy peas, pickled onions and some chips, please. Chips? Should you be having those? Oh my god, you're so right. So, um, yeah, I guess I'll see you around, guys. Over to you, Jamie. Extra large chips, please. Ignore the lady, she has yet to learn how to live deliberately. Uh, hello? Oh my god, you've got to be kidding me. It's not me telling you that you can't have them. What are you doing? Oh my god, are you hiding? No, as this is my first class, I thought that I would set the tone by offering you a bribe. She's gone now, anyway. She probably recognised your car. Yeah, probably. One of the pitfalls of owning a rare car, it's like a beacon. That's where Bond went wrong. Oh my god, you! Me? Hello. It's you. You drenched me with your car. Well, I'm ----. Hi. I really am sorry. Yeah, me too. We have a student here, all the way from... New York. Hey! She's in here! They do say that everything is bigger in New York. Actually, that's Texas. She calls out the arrested development man-whore in the 1800s. It's brilliant, it's perfect for Professor Davenport. I'm going to go send it. I don't really want the cake, thank you. You don't want the cake? No. Fine. It's just that Mrs Mackenzie sort of crafted it in her very own college kitchen, so it's basically an insult to the college, everyone here and all of Oxfordshire. Well, I'm going to eat it. I'm not going to force you to eat it, I just... It's not what I want. I know you do, but... I insist. Fine. You better be there. Do you hear me? So, you're my American MA scholar. And you're not the professor I came to see. I'm actually... I can't be bothered. She's very lazy, actually. Sorry to disappoint. I am disappointed. You think that men are only capable of loving a woman for six months? Some men, yes. I don't normally hide in chip shops. And drench people with puddles. Terrible mistake. But what if they love deeply for that time? I'm actually very mature. Oh, that is very reassuring. Wait. Do you think that things are only meaningful if they last forever? Of course. I don't need rescuing, thank you. I'm impressed. You found hope in the single most pessimistic poem of the Victorian era. Well, I wouldn't want to drag you away from your harem of girls back there. Well, if harem girls are anything, it's patient. Well, now you know something about me. Shall we? Jamie, I just got a call from the... Oh, my God. I'm so, so sorry. It was totally my fault. So, Anna, why did you choose Oxford? I have a library fetish. Okay. I just love being surrounded by books. I just think there's no better smell in the world than the smell of old books. Sorry, so you started planning to come here when you were ten? Ten and three quarters, actually. I already have a job as a financial analyst at Goldman Sachs when I get back. That sounds riveting. Not everyone can afford a vintage car and a teacher's salary. Anna, do you have a minute? If you have time, then there's something I'd like to show you. I was wondering what happened to that ten-year-old dreamer. She found a new dream. To make enough money not to have to worry about money. Money can't solve all problems. It's literally something only rich people say. Welcome to Duke Humphrey's library. I think that life has a way of derailing even the best laid plans. You should never regret the things that you do. You should only regret the things that you don't do. Right, but you must regret that karaoke. Smells so good. Here we go. Ready? Definitely did not have bad karaoke and kebabs on my Oxford wish list. But I had a really great time. Demetrius is our place. Ours? As in me and you? When was this printed, Professor? 19... 1917. Yeah. Trust me, Anna, it's not worth the pain. Right, Emma. Then you absolutely have to go on a grand tour around Europe before you leave. Glorious beach to, as Tennyson said, watch sunset and evening star. Sounds like someone else has a plan. Go to the red light district in Amsterdam. I'm not that kind of girl. How long will it take you to put the top up? We could go together. Together? No, no, no, Professor, that sounds rather serious. I'm only looking for fun. Not to be blunt, but this is just fun. Oh, yeah. Fun. You have a place? I do. How did your brother die? Let's continue with the tour. God, it's been so long, I assumed you lived in that car. You haven't seen the bedroom yet? Best view ever. So fun. I'm so sorry, what was that? The boat race next weekend. Are you coming? I'm going to be really busy over the next few weeks. I have to really focus on my doctoral thesis. I'm going to go get dressed. Yes, great, thank you. You must be sick of seeing him all the time in the library every day. Oh, no, I haven't seen Jamie in weeks. Oh, my God. No, Anna, wait. Eddie had cancer. I don't understand how you've been dealing with all of this. I've had Cecilia, who was Eddie's girlfriend, and she was with him through all of it. Basically family now. What is this? Get out. Jamie, I... Get out! What you saw was my final treatment, so maybe it buys me time, maybe it doesn't. How is any of this funny? It's funny because the two people in this city who most needed a casual relationship ended up here. Don't waste the short time you have left in Oxford on me. I saw what happened to Cecilia with Eddie. I'm not putting you through that. We said we'd have fun, and we have. Loads of it. But my illness isn't fun. So it ends now with a kebab. Jamie, just because something is fleeting doesn't mean it's not meaningful. I can't pretend to understand what you're going through, but I know that you don't have to do it alone. This is the messiness of life. And as an annoyingly brilliant man once told me, these are the best bits. I have something I really need to discuss with you. Yes? Your birthday is next weekend. Oh my God, Jamie. Nothing's changed. Keep having fun. Yeah. I don't want the same things that I thought I wanted. Do you ever regret it? And I know that I can't afford to make the wrong choice, but I could never regret it. I'm staying here. Maybe it is not the length of time that you spend on Earth. Maybe it's what you do with it. That what Thoreau meant by living deliberately wasn't planning everything, but being definite about every small moment. Because a succession of moments is really all we have. And I want mine to be with you, however many we have left. Amsterdam. In the heart of the red light district. I'm not that kind of boy. I fear that you'll regret it. Well, I'm of the opinion that you should never regret the things you do. You should only regret the things you don't do. Thank you. I love you too. A well-lived life might come at a price, but, bugger me if it's not worth every penny. Nothing is permanent. Our passions, our loves, or indeed our lives might indeed be fleeting. But if, while we have the chance, we embrace them fully, then we can say that we have truly lived. Jesus Christ, look at the gold! Poetry, poetry can be taught, but really, it should be tried. It should be tested. It should be engaged with. Take it on. Allow it to change your life. So as this is my first class, I'd like to begin by offering you a bribe.