Selena Gomez Talks the Vulnerability of "Lose You To Love Me" + more with Booker

Guys, it's Booker. That's Selena Gomez. What the hell are you doing here? Oh, wow. What an intro. You like that, don't you? I just live in my life. That's what I'm doing. You've been living it, let's say, a little less than people have seen. Can I start with that as a safe pass? Sure, absolutely. I love what you've done with social, no, I love what you've not done with social media. I tend to agree with most of everything you've ever said about, I think a lot of people need to step away from this because, man, it's unhealthy and kind of take it from there. It's a bit scary. I mean, look, I've never wanted to say anything disrespectful about the app because it's unbelievable. It really is to just connect with people on a totally different level and that's something I always will cherish. It's just, yeah, I just think that it's not healthy for someone to spend that much time and I got caught up in it, you know, that's why I had to take a break. It's just, I just started comparing myself and not feeling good about myself, reading things that I didn't need to read or seeing things that had nothing to do with me or that were lies. So, I just think it's healthy. You know, I'm not saying quit it, but maybe take a weekend off or a few days off and you'll just notice your mood gets better. It must be a, I think the words maybe a weird power to have when you know that there's that gigantic number that sees it with you. Is that intimidating in any sort of way? Does it make you think, okay, I can't share so much? There's a power there or something to me. You see where I'm going with that now? Yeah, but it's just, it's, I understand the responsibility of it, but I don't, I don't overthink it. You know, I think it's just, I just like to release what I release and I've messed up. Sometimes I like posted things. I'm like, well, that wasn't my best move, but that's what happens, you know? So it's just. Well, every young person does that. But the point is you have a lot more followers than everyone. My mom's not missing a mistake. I'll tell you that. Okay. Well, that's good to know. Lose you to love me. Let's start there. I'll make a statement. You can follow it up with whatever you think, but I'll say this. It's your best song that you've ever done. Oh, thank you. I think it is. Do you agree? Concur? Think it's okay? What do you think? I mean, honestly, it is a huge moment for me. I was very proud. We wrote the song over a year ago and it was really emotional and I didn't know when the right time or if I would release it because it was more for me and it just worked out the way it worked out. And yes, I do think it's one of my best songs. Yeah. I think it is the best. I said the best song. Thank you very much. I really believe that it is and why it's so great. And maybe just because I'm a narcissist, but listening to it, I applied it to myself first and it took me to one specific sort of thing that happened. And then I went back and I went, oh, poor Selena, this is about her. She went through this stuff. You're like, wait a minute. No, that was good though. That's the, that's the whole idea of the song is turning something that was really messy for me into something that people can have. And I honestly, it's a, it's the greatest gift I could have gotten, you know? Have you with, I guess without us not, cause it hasn't been on a show or anything, but have you performed this anywhere or in front of friends or in any sort of space and, and work this out yet? Not yet, but that will be happening. Yes. So what's that look like? I guess it's just me getting back into all of it. I sing all the time. I love singing, obviously, but now putting together something that is special is exciting. And yeah, we'll see. There's a, I mean, I would say that performing there's a muscle memory somewhere with the song and the lyrics just become lyrics. But would you say for the first few times, is it kind of raw? Does a song take you there? Or are you more thinking I have to hit this note? How does that work? No, I'm always, I'm super emotional. You guys overly sensitive. I will cry about anything and everything. But yeah, of course I feel, I feel the emotion. It's just where I'm at. If I did release this song a year ago, I don't think that I would even be able to talk about it. Right. But after taking some time for me and working on the album and finishing it, it just felt like a strong moment. So more than anything, it brings me joy when I sing it. Okay. You're obviously you're so well known in public and people know of your relationships and stuff. Does it make it harder to release a song when people are going to obviously speculate on who it could be about or what relation this and that? Is it, is that, does that time, I guess the question is, does that time heal that and make you say I'm okay with it? It is my life. It is my experience. Totally. At this point. Yes. I mean, I think when I was younger growing up, I found it very frustrating because you're kids and you're figuring out life and that's kind of inappropriate to be super invested in a teenage, you know, romance. And so, you know, I think that it was a lot harder then, but because I've lived so much life and I've been grateful for the experiences that I've had, messy or not, uh, hard or fun. And so it's a bit different for me now. It's just like, it's just like every other song that's written. It's about someone and it's come somewhere. And I'm, I'm okay with that because that's a part of my story. And you know, now it's not. So it's such a great way for me to kind of wrap it all up in this bow and, and set it aside and now just continue the rest of the album. Not to put stress on you, but how is the anxiety of coming back out and promoting and talking about a record? Because I thought we lost you. I did. I said, I said, guys, I was like, got to throw on the towel. I believe that. And I wouldn't have blamed you. You've had a lot go on in your life and to do it under a micro literally like a damn microscope, every move that you've made. I thought that you would say I've had enough and I'm going to let my music speak for me. So I was like, that's fine. But then you're back and you came in. Um, is there an anxiety to doing that and realizing that people will pick up on every stupid thing that I say to you, to how your response and you're okay. You're cool. I'm 100% cool. Huh? I just, yeah, I would melt. I would, I don't know how you do it. Well, it's, it's all about timing and, um, and you know, you're kind of never ready for it. They just go for it. Yeah. So yeah, I'm, I'm feeling great. And I wanted to, to be a part of this and yeah, I don't know, but I do have moments where I just want to stop and just chill, not see what everybody's saying or doing. And I still don't, to be honest. I mean, I can assume what's happening and people warn me if there's anything negative going on because I don't like that and I don't stand for that. I don't think it's appropriate and that's it. Then the rest is just my life. You know, when you, when I look at something online, it's such a tiny thing for me. I don't care if it gets a million views. It's so tiny because when I put that screen down, it's all, it's gone away. Well, that goes back to our initial comments about this, that I feel like a lot of people have stuck themselves in that world and they're actually living a better life or some different life in that world. It's kind of scary. It really is. Cause I'm like, that's not you. I know you, your hair doesn't look that good. That's what I see. Exactly. I mean, that's half of my post too. We all do it. Okay. So you give us this song, you tear our hearts out. You make us think about, you know, lost love. You're killing me Smalls. Like it's just, it's heartbreaking. You gave us about two days, two days to have that emotion. And then all of a sudden I think it's time to put a bop out now. So let's talk to that just for a second. You know, look, look at her now. You put the song out very quickly afterwards. Yes. And was that intentional? Was the span of time between the two? Did you do this purposefully? Why? Well, it made sense for me because those two records are very personal, but it only made sense to release both to show the vulnerability of something I've walked through. And then to come out on the other side, hopefully empowering people to just, especially women, just empowering them and, and, and knowing that you've got it. And it's not easy to do, but I released that for my fans because I mean, they've stuck by my side through all of it. And they just, you know, they've been cheering me on and they've just stayed there for years and years, even if I may have not been there and I appreciate it. So I wanted to show them that I was okay. I wanted that to be, I'm chill. I'm good. It was really, I'm glad you answered that way. Cause it felt really thought out and kind of cool that it does feel like what a breakup is. There's the sweatpants period, if you will, there's the, I live in that period a lot. Well, don't we all, we would all like to stay at that. I would stay at it constantly if I could, but I don't have to work. But there is that period of, of, of mourning a relationship or a loss or whatever, whatever, however, that song connects to you. It's a relationship for me, um, to, to the next move is go get the girls play a song that you could bop to. And I'm, I think it's really cool that you did that. I'm glad you thought it out that way. Yeah. I wanted it to be a big celebration. This isn't something that's sad. This isn't something that's tragic. This is something that I feel, I feel great about. And I never thought that I would cause it just, you know, all of it sucked. And now to be on the other side and celebrating with my friends and my family and my fans and all of you guys, it's the best gift, you know, one of the worst moments in my entire life ended up being the best thing that's ever happened to me. Talking about a horrible moment, your health, God, we were so worried to death. Are you all right? I'm chill. Yes, I'm fine. Yes, yes. I'm always honest with people. I mean, I think it's priority. It's number one for me to take care of myself, whether that's mentally, emotionally, you know, physically, it's all super important to me. So I have nothing to, to be ashamed of by saying, you know, I actually need to take a second and take care of myself. And I have a lot of medical issues that I'll be battling for the rest of my life. But I, I continue to choose to work on myself with, you know, therapy and working with my doctors closely, making sure I'm on the right medication. So it's, it's actually, it's, it's hard, but then you get into a groove and you know, it works for you. And that's something I believe in, you know, people, I think people need help sometimes. And it's, it's not bad to say that you do. So I'm a huge advocate for that. What's the new fun thing that you found, or maybe that you've discovered growing up? Like, for me, it's cooking. And it's gardening. I like the garden. Oh, I grow tomatoes, come over for pasta anytime. It's amazing. Is there anything that you found that you know, grown up Selena is like, who would have thought? Well, I don't feel like I've grown up. So no, no, I'm listening to you. I think I think you need to, you know, maybe embrace that. Thanks. I've, I've been able to enjoy my life in a different way. I love being with my friends and doing things that, you know, going taking a drive for 45 minutes, we went to the pumpkin patch, and we just stayed there for hours and just hung out and we'll go to color me mine and make pottery. And I made this really cute snack bowl for my dog, like just the dumbest things, but they bring me so much joy. And it's just, I think that's a big sign. You know, I got to go out with my friends last night to celebrate. And it's like, midnight. I'm like, All right, I did it, guys. I'm ready to go home. And the best part was we went home and played card games for two hours and just laughed. And that's, that's what it feels like for me. It's not so much trying to just chase, you know, chase something and be hype about it, or, you know, throw yourself into something. It's just, I think that's a big sign for me to just chill and be with my friends. So I'm not chill a lot in this interview, because I guess I'm really chill right now, everybody. You've done a lot of chilling. A lot of chilling. It's good. It's working for you. Are you going to go back out on the road? Is this something you're planning on doing? It's actually very important to me. I know that it's been super complicated in the past. And it's just because it's hard. It's really hard on someone to just, you know, keep going and you're in this bus and you're confined to a place and I go days without seeing sunlight sometimes. And that's, that's really hard. But there's a lot of places that I want to go to that I haven't and South America would be priority for me. Cool. Okay. So you'll tour the album. Yeah, look, if I'm you, but I might. Fine. Yeah. If look, if you need all of the time, if you need six months between shows, I think we're cool. I think we're like, you know what, you just take care of yourself. Matter of fact, I would like to bubble wrap you if we could just bubble wrap you to make sure you're okay. Nothing can happen to you. You're our treasure. So, okay. So we covered that the tour, the album is going to be released on no date yet. Come on. Genuinely. Is it done? It's done. You finished it. You said you finished it. Yes. Then why is there no date? Because we, we, we actually, I didn't know we were going to release this at all. We, this has all kind of been happening in, in such a crazy way. We shot the videos just last week, like a week ago and they're out. So a lot of this has been fast paced. It's not going to be a long wait though. I can guarantee that. Hmm. Long wait. I'm going to try to cut through this and say, uh, Christmas time. Oh, okay. At least I got a noise out of you. I listen. A lot of people will, will, will cut that up and they will, they will, they will say that they'll have specialists come in. They'll say, that noise. Um, I, I think you're delightful. I, we look forward to whatever's coming next. I can't believe you're here. I really can't. I know. I just can't believe that you're, you're doing it. And I think it's great that you're promoting music and you're out and you're happy and you're telling people that you're happy and I love everything that you say. And she's Selena Gomez. That's, that's all I can say to this. So there you go. Thank you. Okay. Yes. He wants to ask you a question too. Can you do it? I'm actually just bombarding his interview. I love it because I, I finally started watching living undocumented and I feel like I had to prepare myself for something like that. By the way, kudos to you for being so courageous and like brave to like, it takes a lot of courage. A lot of people don't realize it takes a lot of courage to talk about like your mental health and be an advocate for all those, all those things. And then to take your platform and take a stance on families who are living here undocumented, it takes a lot of courage. So like, I want to just give you props on that. I appreciate that. And it was a personal, personal piece because of your family, how they came here. For me, watching this film, my, both my parents came here undocumented. And so for a long time they were here and they got their citizenship, but it was very, it was a very personal journey for me to watch all of these families. And I'm, I'm crying. I, I, um, how, how has this changed you like taking on this project? Are you more encouraged now or like feeling more encouraged to put more focus on these type of topics? Absolutely. I think that it's, it's actually the best thing that I could ever do with my platform. And I would almost feel ridiculous if I didn't, you know, stand up for things that I really care about. And I was scared for years, scared to do anything like that because people are mean. Yeah. And they are mean, but then that's, I can't live in fear. I don't want to live in fear anymore because it's exhausting. Yeah. So being able to, to be a part of a project like that, that's probably my proudest moment of my whole work that I've done. Um, but yeah, it's, it's, it's what I want to share with people. I can't be, I don't know. I can't be fake. I can't try to pretend I'm good all the time. I can't say I don't care or, or any of that. And people would always hate on me for being nice, you know? So then I tried for a second to just be whatever about everything. And that didn't feel authentic either. So I just, I'm proud and that's, thank you so, so much for saying that to me because that's, it's not about me, but it is about those families. And I wanted people to see the humanity behind what was going on. Cause they're just seeing everything on the news and they're using these terms that are, that are disrespectful to people that aren't even real. That's, that was going to be my next question. What was you, you're hoping for the audience to because there was so much that I took away from him and I, and I kind of lived with the fear of my family doing that. But for those who say, do it like everybody else and be normal and, and get your citizenship and your passway, you know, your passage to the United States, the right way. Right. I mean, it took my family 18 years and there was no climate of all of this changing and, and any of that. But I can't imagine I wouldn't be here, you know, and that's such a surreal feeling because I'm grateful that I get to live in this country and that I get to do the things that I love and have my family be safe and also doing what they love. So same, it just, yeah, you gotta watch it, Booker, which everybody in this room, please watch it, please. Even if it's just the first episode, just the first episode, the first 10 minutes will get you in and you're just like hooked. So thank you for doing that. That's thank you for letting me bombard your interview Booker. I needed to make sure she knew and the world knew how incredible it is. And I'm so glad and so proud to know that, that this is, this is a woman doing this as a woman of color doing this. And yeah, girl, that's it. Thank you. You know what I'm saying? Well, hopefully we were painless enough for you. Yeah, you're great guys. This is awesome.