Atheist Shocked by Who She Saw in Heaven (NDE)

My gaze, my focus went deeper and looked at each one separately. And as I looked at each person separately, it's almost like they would rise up and then they would come closer. And as they got closer, they actually turned into the light of a candle. Hello, thank you for having me here. My name is Lina Zafri. And I am here today to share with you my near-death story. But before I can tell you a little bit about myself before my near-death experience. So my near-death experience actually happened in January of 2014. So that's 10 years ago. And 10 years ago, I was living in Southern California. I was married. I had two very young children. I had a son who was about to be five and then a daughter who was about 18 months old, nursing, normal life. I was a busy mom. I was happy, happily married, happy life. I was not religious. I was not spiritual. I really kind of floated into my own world. I didn't have any beliefs. So there's really, I don't know why I had the experience, but the experience happened at a time in my life when I was happy and healthy. Physically, I was in excellent shape. But I happened to catch a cold and I got sick from a, I guess, seasonal cough and cold, which turned into something a little bit more serious. And that's kind of when the whole thing started. And by the time this happened, this was the beginning of January, and I was having a hard time breathing. I couldn't breathe. And every breath actually hurt my chest. So for the first time, I realized I needed to go to the ER and get checked out. That's just going in to get checked out turned into a very long stay and really a crazy experience in a good way, I guess. So after I got admitted into the hospital for the first three days, I was, I guess, fairly conscious. I knew I was in the hospital. I repeatedly asked to go home because I had children waiting at home. They didn't even know what happened to me. I put them to bed one night at 10 o'clock at night, and they saw me. And then I went to the hospital at 10 o'clock at night for pain, trouble breathing. So when my kids woke up the next day, they was like, where's mom? You know, I mean, so they were just left surprised. So these three days were very difficult for me. Just wanted to go home. Three days, something happened. My health took a turn and I was taken to the ICU where I spent the next five days in the ICU. And in the ICU, pretty much the same thing. The only conscious awareness or memory I have is basically asking to go home to my kids because, you know, I was a nursing mom and my daughter was like 18 months old. So my only thoughts and my only, you know, thing was just let me go home to my kids. So it was the only thing on my mind. So come that final day, after five days, now I understand, like my family tells me what happened, but at the time in that last day in the ICU, I literally, they were getting ready to intubate me because my lungs gave up. I, both of my lungs collapsed and I couldn't breathe on my own. That's why I was in the ICU. But something magical happened. The only way I can describe it is I literally just, I woke up, I got up, I was in the ICU at a time when the doctors basically told my father and my husband that I was unresponsive to any treatments. Both of my lungs have been severely damaged and that there's really no, nothing they can do for me. That's the state of health I was in at that moment. But somehow I just woke up, I got up and I sat up and I looked down and I looked around and I knew exactly where I was. I was completely conscious the way I am sitting with you. And all of a sudden I realized I was in the same ICU room. But what was interesting is I happened to look down to my right and I looked down and I saw my actual physical body laying there. In the hospital gown, just laying in the bed. I was like, oh, that's my body. So, which made me come back and look over here. And as I looked, I happened to look down and look at myself. And when I'm looking at myself at this point, I'm completely clear. I am in full shape and full form. I can see my exact body, my legs and my thighs, but I'm clear. And just to give you an idea, I'm literally as clear as this glass bottle. So, I'm see-through. So, I see myself and I notice that I'm completely see-through. And it's like all this is happening and at the same time while it's happening, I hear a voice. I hear a voice coming from like the distance, but I can hear it from within. And this voice is basically saying, Lina, you gotta go back. You have to go back and only you can make that decision. You have to make a choice and you gotta go back. And this voice just comes to me as this very maternal, motherly, authoritative voice. Kind of like the way I would be talking, like a mother would be talking to the child. Like, come on, you gotta go now, move it. So, as I'm listening to that, I look to my left to the other side and I notice both of my kids were sitting there. And as I look at my kids, it's almost like, how can I describe it? It's almost like the lights get brighter, the air gets crisper and it's like I feel love but it's almost like, it's like having light bulbs at dim but then turning them on all the way and then they become very bright. It was almost like that. So, it was just this sense of love and emotion that I knew that that was my kids and my heart was just in joy. And at this moment, something very interesting happened is I looked further up as I took my gaze off my children and I happened to look up a little bit. What I saw in the distance was this beautiful dark blue black sky, kind of starlit sky but you could see me. And in that space, I saw a group of people sitting there. There was a couple rows of people just sitting there and they're all facing me, they're all face towards me. I couldn't see their faces, I don't know who they were but I knew they were people that were related to me like family and friends here on earth. So, as I looked at them, the awareness that I knew who they were and I also knew that they were praying actually for me, that they were all sitting in prayer. I couldn't hear their prayer, I couldn't hear what they were saying but I felt it. It was just this felt sense of the love space that their hearts were in when they were praying. And at that moment, it's like my gaze, my focus went deeper and looked at each one separately and as I looked at each person separately, it's almost like they would rise up and then they would come closer. And as they got closer, they actually turned into the light of a candle. So, I didn't get to see who they were, I didn't see a face. What I saw was the light that they were. And so, that right there, it was just at that moment, now you have to understand all this is happening at the same time but differently and all of a sudden, I'm back, my awareness is brought back to this voice that is kind of saying, come on, Lena, you got to hurry up and make a decision. And it is at that moment that I don't know how because I have no conscious memory of it but I went back into my body. And I have no memory of how I went into my body, I don't know when I got into my body, I don't know, I don't have memory of waking up in my body but I woke up and not only did I wake up but I woke up with both of my lungs completely healed. I was breathing on my own completely. There was no more help breathing. Not only that but I woke up and I was hungry. I'd been in the hospital for nine days and I asked for food and I do not have a memory of any of this and the only reason I know this happened is about a year, year and a half ago when I was speaking with my now ex-husband, if he had any memories or remembers anything about what happened during those nine days in the hospital. Well, I was unconscious and so he shared some stories with me and he shared videos that he took, he shared pictures that he took of me while I was in the hospital. And there's a picture of me, there's several pictures, there's a picture of me on third day sitting up and completely healthy next to my doctor and then there's a picture of me eating a burger the day after I woke up and I'm eating a burger and there's fries and there's a soda and that picture, while that was happening, I have no conscious memory of it. It was a picture that I saw that said, okay, that's what I did. But so my NDE happened in a way that I had no idea, it was just like being normal everyday life, it was just an experience. I woke up, this is what happened and I went back into my body, woke up and life went on as usual. I went home, hugged my kids and was completely healthy. Nobody told me what happened to me, nobody told me what was wrong with me where I was the past nine days. I just kind of went home and picked up my kids and just recuperated, kind of like staying home and just, I guess healed. My connection has been from then and even now is more so, I'm more connected to earth beings than I'm connected to spirit beings. I mean, I'm connected to spirit beings but I feel like my NDE and my time here on earth since my NDE, I realized that my gift and my experience is of me being able to be connected to the other side but also be connected to people here. Like I'm an extreme empath, I'm very sensitive. I can feel people's emotions. I can taste people's emotions in their cooking. I can feel people's emotions collectively in an area. So there's just this sensitivity and connection there. And then as far as the voice that was speaking to me, so I've actually been questioned. Other people have asked about the voice and who I thought it was. At the beginning, I didn't put any labels to it or I didn't have any thought of, oh, that was so-and-so's voice. It was this female authoritative voice that I heard. I don't believe it was the voice of God in any sense, if that makes any sense, but I believe that that somehow was my higher self that is also connected with the other realm. So it was like it was my higher self speaking to me. It's funny because the first five years, I didn't even know I had a near-death experience. I didn't know what it was called. I had no language for it. I'd never heard anything about it. I didn't know that something like that even happened to humans. I didn't know if it was even humanly possible. So I had no idea, but I always wondered how, what exactly, how do I explain it? I didn't know how to explain what happened to me and kind of integrate it without realizing what it was. So it was really after when I found out that I was not the only one, that I was not the only person on this planet experiencing this, that's when I understood it. But before that, I just wanted to know what happened. In my NDE, it was just very much focused on me, my children, and my ability to come back. So when I was in the state of being clear, when I was clear, when I looked at my body and my human body was outside of me, and I was in spirit, so that moment of recognizing that I was spirit and clear, right? Meaning that when I'm in my clarity, when I'm in my, within my higher self, when I'm in my spirit self, when I put my ego, you know, the body, the ego, when I can put that aside and be in my higher self, clear self in that space, what I have learned to understand from my NDE is that at that moment, I serve as a mirror. I serve as a mirror. So where I focus, who I focus on, it's almost like they get to see their true selves within me. And also, if when people are open, because, you know, I can intrude on you and you can't intrude on me, but if we are in open exchange and, you know, like communication, I also have the ability to help show you the light that you are. Because when I looked at each person, what I saw was them. What I saw was not the human part of them. I saw the human part of them, but when they came close to me, I saw that the light that they are. So I don't know if I have any messages for humanity beyond that you are light. You really are. You are light, but on earth, you are covered with flesh and you have a body. But when you are connected in that space, wherever that is, in whatever you call prayer, when you're in, in that reflection space, when you're there to pray for somebody, in that moment, in those moments is when we become light. So it was almost like when you're in a space of prayer, meditative, in that space of, you know, oneness, God, whoever, whatever you pray to, however you do it, when you do that for someone and that person, it's light meeting light. It's healing. And that's what I gathered from my NDE. I've had some incredible experiences since my NDE. I had a spiritually transformative experience, like a spontaneous spiritual awakening that happened in a float tank three years after my NDE, which I've actually spoken about. That was like a continuum, a continuation of what I call my NDE. I think I believe that in my NDE, I was so rushed and in such a hurry to come back, given the opportunity to come back, that I feel like I jumped into my body so quickly that it took time for me to even wake up. But I also feel like that left an open portal. Like it left, kind of like I left in such a hurry that it, I was very open to a lot of other spiritual experiences after that. And after those experiences, my life kind of fell apart before it made sense because there was such a shift in me. There was so much going on with inside of me, making sense of what I had experienced and then trying to put that together in this humanly life and this human body as Lina. So it's taken some time, but it was a transition. Do I have new abilities? I don't know if I would really call them new abilities. I think what I would describe my experience now is an awareness and a deeper understanding of being human. So all my clairsentience, clairaudience, all my clairs kicked in pretty quick. But interestingly, intellectually, I didn't understand all those things for a few years. So I was hypersensitive. I could see things, I could hear things, I can feel things, I understood things, I would get downloads. Like all these things were happening to me and more dramatic than before. And it was hard because the people around me couldn't understand the way I was. It affected how I lived my life. It affected everything about me. It was almost like I had to relearn to be me, but I had to figure out who I was. It was almost like I came back as Lina into Lina's body. But I was almost like, I had to get to know myself because I'd spend a lifetime really not looking inward, but spending my time looking outward. I don't wanna say I was a people pleaser, but I was always worried with the world outside and how everybody else felt, how everybody else thought, what everybody else needed. And they always put me last. And after the experience, I think that shifted. I started to look within more because I had to figure out who I was because I had so many broken relationships in the aftermath of the way I was that I had to figure out what happened to me. Who am I? What am I? Like, what is going on? Every moment that life unfolds for me, I experience it and I see it from the different perspectives that I experienced both in my near death and my spiritually transformative experience. But in all of it, honestly, what I've learned is that everything is energy and vibration, right? We are all energy and vibration. And everything in this world can be healed and fixed through bringing harmony to energy and vibration, meaning you have to look at yourself as a harmonious vibration and to learn how to tune in and to calm your insight. You can really, really connect to the other side and find your own path and find your own light because the moment our light is turned on, the moment we realize that we, who we are and that we are light and healing happens, you know? And we can learn to do that by being aware of our mind and our emotions and how they affect us physically. And everything goes back to energy and emotions and vibrations. And yeah, and love is of the highest vibration and it's something that we can all go into because we come from love. So if we can learn to give each other love and learn to give ourselves love, it's like there is outside of that, I don't think there's anything more powerful on the planet than that. And when everybody realizes their own light and ability to self-heal and be in this world as light. So we all have, we all come here with a mission and a purpose and we all come here to have experiences. And sometimes those experiences require earthly situations. So you can't really avoid or take away because sometimes somebody's tragedy ends up becoming their gift, right? So we can't take away all the bad in this world. But I do believe that if we have more conscious leaders, I think if we have people in areas of power, if we have those individuals, either being of, I wanna say higher vibrational, meaning having the depth, this kind of experience and understanding of life to be able to help make different policies, decisions because we can, it's easy for leaders to shake hands and decide to be friends. And it's very easy for the top leaders to be like pissed off and disagree and then send soldiers and tanks and start wars. It all starts with leaders and how they communicate and how they set policies and how they move forward. So is it possible? I think it is. And I don't think love can come and stop war and fix everybody and make everybody hug and kiss and be friends because people are programmed from generations and generations of so much hurt, hate and pain that it's just kind of like a snowball. But I think if we had leaders that can help calm and minimize and help and create harmony within each cluster, I think that together we can come and have a more harmonious world. I think it's possible. I really truly believe that every human on life in the world comes from the same source, love and light and energy. We come here to experience having a human life and making decisions. We all come equipped with the same love and light and energy source. And we all go back to the same. So that means we are all worthy of the same thing. We come from love, we go back to love. So our time here on this earth is a choice that we all made whether we realized it or not. Now, we may not have made the choices that have been made on our behalf by the world around us. And that's different. Now, at any point we can choose, right? We can choose to look within. There are many great teachers that help teach how to find self-love and have self-acceptance in this world when you've been raised without it. But my suggestion is find people who make your heart feel love. Learn to tap into love. Sometimes if you don't have anything else worthy of love outside of you, you can actually learn to go within, close your eyes and imagine in your own mind's eye something that represents love to you. And in that moment, regardless of if it exists or not outside of you, when you in your own inner mind and in your heart, when your mind sees a picture that represents love and your heart joins it and you feel love, that right there is healing. If you do that long enough, eventually like drops of water in a cup, eventually you start to see the self-love. You start to see your own life and your own worthiness. Does it take time? Absolutely. Does it have to take a long time? No, not necessarily, but you do have to find time to sit within and take some deep breaths and just in your mind's eye, find what love means to you and do your best to feel it, imagine it, picture it. And slowly that takes you out of the vibration of fear and pain. And when you're out of that energy and vibration, you naturally start to drift into the energy of love. And in that space, love encompasses and holds you. And whatever is troubling you in that moment, will find a way to speak with you and show you a way out. But you have to learn to trust and love yourself. You have to spend time within that space of just finding love and feeling the energy of it. And that's all it is, just feeling how it would feel. And that over time is what heals. Message for the youth for the future. My message to the youth would have to be is, learn to love yourself, learn to accept yourself. You were born from love, you will return to love. Don't wait for somebody else to love you because when you feel love, whatever you do from love will produce positive life for you. And I don't think that we are here to prove anything or to fix anything or to do anything. But we are here to be and to experience and to do what makes us feel happy as long as we do it with love. So regardless of what you do, do it with love. Even if it's something you don't wanna do, do it with love. Because in the process of doing it with the emotion of love, what you do transforms.