Demi Lovato Opens Up About Child Stardom, Mental Health & Resilience | Teen Vogue

I was so uncomfortable, like, performing for the first time in that movie on a stage. I just did what my body wanted to do, and I came up with a really cringy dance move. Hi everyone, I'm Varsha Sharma, the editor-in-chief of Teen Vogue, and I am so excited to be sitting here today with Demi Lovato, our September cover star this year. We're going to be talking about everything from mental health, to Camp Rock, to Camp Rock 2, which I now know you're very proud of, to being in the spotlight at a young age, the latter of which is the focus of your upcoming documentary, Child Star on Hulu. Our visual editor actually went back into the archive and was able to pull some digital copies of all of your former covers and cover stories from Teen Vogue. So this is... Oh yeah, with the blonde and blue hair, I remember that. Yes, this clutch braid. It was at this really cool house that I've never forgotten. There were antiques everywhere. It was something out of a movie. Then we have this one. Oh my god, I remember that helicopters were flying over that shoot trying to get a picture. Really? Oh, the paparazzi. The paparazzi, they were out. Tell me, how was it for you today then, being back after all of these years? It was so fun. I got to bring my new baby, Pickle. Love, yes. So Pickle's just hanging out with us today. Pickle's making his Teen Vogue debut. Yes. I love it. I want to say upfront that you have been a major mental health advocate throughout your whole career. I'm somebody who struggles with depression and anxiety myself, and I appreciate your honesty and openness about it so much. I'm on medication. I go to therapy. I know a lot of people do, but it's still something that it feels like we're only just now beginning to be very open about. So in your mental health journey, where do you feel like things stand for you now? Well, first of all, I just want to say thank you for sharing. Not everyone chooses to share personal facts about their life with me. I feel like sometimes I'm the one out in the open shouting from the rooftops like, hey, look at me, I have this going on. But I'm also on medication, and medication is something that has worked wonders for me, especially being bipolar. I feel like I'm in a really great place in my life. I have a lot of things that I have to look forward to and that I'm excited for, but sometimes you can have all of that going on, and if your mental health is suffering, it can still get to you. So I'm just grateful that I'm in a place where I can say that I really put in the work with my treatment team and with myself, and I can look forward to those things. One of the things that you spoke about was medication and your medication journey. That stood out to me because this is also something that I feel like not enough people talk about. You have to try different treatments. You have to try different types of medication. When I first became an advocate for my mental health and other people's mental health journey, I realized that sometimes it takes 10 years to get a diagnosis, the right diagnosis. And then on top of that, you've got to go through finding the right medication for you, which can take up to weeks, months, years at a time. And it's really challenging. I struggled for so many years with bipolar disorder before I realized that's what it was. Bouts of mania, where I would be up until 6, 7 in the morning just writing 10 songs a night. I liked it for my creativity, but it wasn't something that provided a stable lifestyle for me. Let's talk about the upcoming release of your Hulu documentary, Child Star. Yes. It is your directorial debut, so congratulations. That's very exciting. I've seen it. It's powerful. It's honest. Can you tell us a little bit about how it all came to be? I had this idea floating around in my brain for several years before I even opened my mouth and talked about it. What I wanted to do was make a film about my experience as a child star, but also other people's experiences as child stars and go down the history of child stardom. What was the history with Jackie Coogan and Shirley Temple and all these child stars that came before us? Then I wanted to explore why is it that some child stars go down a difficult path? Why is it that some turn out totally fine and normal? What is it like to step away from the industry? What is it like to stay in? Me and my co-director, Nicola Marsh, did a really great job of putting that all and packing that into a film. You mentioned you do interview a number of fellow child stars. There's Kenan Thompson, Jojo Siwa, Raven-Symoné. What did they say when you first called them up with the idea? Some people were like, yes, immediately, right away. Some people were like, well, what is the direction of this documentary? What kind of film are we making on child stardom? I think some people were a little bit more apprehensive than others because it hasn't been the easiest journey for everyone. So that was totally understandable. And once I explained to them the film and the purpose behind it, they got behind it and it was great. Some of the bullying moments that you share in the documentary from your own childhood are really affecting. The suicide petition is particularly disturbing. Can you first paraphrase just like what that story is briefly for our audience? I was bullied in the seventh grade and I left public school because of it. Kids in my grade were, I think, resentful that I was stepping into a career at such a young age that set me up for potential fame and fortune. And I think that they didn't know how to handle it. When I asked them, you know, why are you bullying me? Like, why are you doing this? Their reactions were, you're fat and you're a whore. I wasn't those things. Of course. I came to realize later what it actually was, was, oh, there was some jealousy there. There was a letter that had some really hurtful things in there. And one of the things that it said was, you should kill yourself. And what they did was they passed it around the school and people signed it. So whether they intended it to be or not, it turned out to be like a suicide petition. It was a really dark time for me. It threw me into a spiral and it traumatized me. And I still deal with that today. You've now become a major anti-bullying advocate based on some of your own experiences. So how does it feel to look back on that now? I feel like I've done a lot of work around it. I do feel like sometimes I have trust issues that surface because of what I went through as a kid. I think that using that platform for good to speak up about bullying and how it can really affect people was the right decision for me. I can say that it doesn't affect me the same way that it once did. One of the other things that stood out to me from the documentary was how alone you felt and then also some of the other child stars that you interviewed. I think it's Christina Ricci talks about how she felt like she didn't belong. That stood out to me because you're beloved, right? All of these kids and young people around the world find connection in your art and in your performances. But as the performers, you felt alone. So what was it like diving into that dichotomy? It's easy to look at someone in the spotlight and say, oh, you're so loved and you're so adored by so many. Why do you feel so alone? But it's so surface. That validation that you're receiving is not from a meaningful connection. It's from people that don't know you. It felt like a mask that I had put on and my mask was my armor from bullies, but it was also my brand and it separated me from deep and meaningful connection with every person that came up to me and said, I love you so much. I'm your biggest fan deep down in my heart. No matter how many people said that they loved and adored me, no matter how many albums I sold or movies I did, I knew that it wasn't going to fill that void. You know, I had a therapist tell me that the opposite of addiction is connection. And I firmly believe that that's true because meaningful connections protect you from isolation. And I feel like I've gotten to a place in my life today where I really value the meaningful connections that are in my life. And I prioritize them in my schedule because I really value it over work now. Whereas when I was a teenager, work was my life. It was my everything. One part that also really stood out to me is the discussion about how celebrities or famous people may have a tendency to die by suicide at higher rates than the general population. What was it like for you hearing that? There were so many times where I thought, this is it. Like, I can't do this anymore. I struggle with suicidal ideations from time to time. More so in my past than now. I haven't dealt with one in a long time, in years, in fact. But it's something that struck a chord with me because I've been there. I've been that empty and been that alone. I had to learn a lot through self-work. I have compassion for everyone that's struggled with that same feeling, definitely. I've struggled with that too. And as open as I have been about my mental health, I don't think I've ever said that on camera. So it's just another example of how you being so open helps people, for sure. Thank you. And once again, thank you for sharing. That's really brave. You talk in the documentary about the commodification of these Disney and Nickelodeon stars, yourself included. Do you remember how you felt when you first saw your image kind of exploding in that way, like the merchandising angle of it and all of that? It was a dream come true. I felt so excited to see my face on towels and bed comforters. And I didn't really understand how that could affect my psyche. I started to step into a role of really being aware of my brand. Right. And what does that mean? And how am I tied to my brand? And how does that affect my identity? You have to act a certain way. And now you're a role model. And your face is going to be on all this stuff. You really start questioning all of the decisions that you make. And as a rebellious teenager, I resented that. I think you said in the documentary, these words should never be used together. Teenage role model. Yeah. Can you elaborate on that? I feel like the term teenage role model is kind of a bit of a conundrum. And it's really ironic that teenagers could be put on a pedestal like that and looked up to when a lot of teenagers are just trying to figure out who they are. You're kind of stripping away the freedom to make mistakes and not be judged for them. To be human. Exactly. Teenagers deserve to be human. Yeah. They deserve to make mistakes and to learn from them, because that's what those years are for. The only teenage role model that I can say that that fits for is Greta Thunberg. Being a climate activist at such a young age and taking on so many powerful people and corporations. But I also have to wonder, does she have room for error in her personal life? Does she feel an immense amount of pressure being in that spotlight? I think she's doing a great job of being a teenage role model. But I do feel bad calling her that because of the pressure it puts on her. Exactly. All right. We're going to switch gears a little bit and talk about some of your movies and some of the work that you dive into and the documentary as well. We have to talk about Camp Rock. You may have seen the way that TikTok and Gen Z and even Gen Alpha now has started to embrace it and fall in love with it. You have seen that. Okay. What is one of the most amusing things related to Camp Rock that you've seen or been sent? They call it the Camp Rock knees. When I first come out in the Camp Rock final jam, they announced my name and I timidly walk out on stage and I'm singing a little bit. Then when the chorus hits, I bust out into these knees. That's the only way I can describe it. Yes. The Camp Rock knees. Let's take a look. Oh, I know exactly which one this is. You can tell by the foliage. Yes. I mean, this is probably one of the most gift clips of all time. I could have been a cheerleader with this dance. Absolutely. We rehearsed so hard on that. What was it like for you seeing that just go like super viral? People love using that clip. They love using that clip. I think there was like one time where someone chopped it up and edited the Kardashians into it and it made me laugh so hard. I love that people are using it. I love that people still remember it. This was a Disney Channel original movie that may not have been seen by anybody, and yet it had success and turned out to be what it is today. I'm grateful for it. I've watched Camp Rock back showing my fiancé. Was it his first time seeing it with you? Yes, of course. He didn't grow up with the Disney Channel, so he was very unfamiliar. We had a good giggle. It's so corny. It's so cheesy. But that's what people loved about it. Yeah, that was the Disney Channel. That was the Disney Channel. It holds a special place in my heart, so of course I wanted him to see it. I think we do have a clip from Sunny with a Champ. You've got all these great ideas and you're full of enthusiasm. Yeah, that's right I am. Well, knock it off! Something that was really meaningful to me were the friendships that I made. I became really good friends with Tiffany Thornton, who was in Sunny with a Chance with me, and I was actually a bridesmaid in her wedding. Building those friendships that last for so long, it was really meaningful to me. I do look back at that time and think, how fun was it that I got to be on a show that was a comedy show? The live audience every Friday night was so exciting and invigorating, and having them throw lines at you in between takes. Okay, you're going to change your lines here, and these are your new lines, and you'd have to memorize them on the spot and then kill it in the next take. And you only had four takes to nail it in, so I am really proud of myself for the work that I did on that show, even if it's a little over the top. I think we have a clip from Princess Protection Program. Oh wait, I remember this scene. I just remember in that scene, the French teacher walks in, and I deliver my lines, which were in French, and I couldn't tell you what I said. We were just talking about memorizing. That was an amazing delivery. Someone could have gotten me into a lot of trouble with feeding me words that I did not know. But luckily, you know, it was a Disney channel, so I wasn't saying anything bad. So you've shared very openly about your experiences with disordered eating since then, and the impacts that fame has had on body and self-image. To a young person who's struggling with those same issues, what wisdom or counsel would you want to share with them based on what you've been through? It's such hard work to overcome these issues, but it's so worth it. One of the greatest accomplishments that I've ever achieved is starting to feel comfortable in my skin. I'm not there yet. It's not even that I've reached this end goal of endless love and acceptance for my body. It's just that I've started to accept my body, and that to me is a place where I never thought that I would ever get to. I'm a work in progress, but I would say to someone younger dealing with those same issues that the work is hard, but it's so worth it. One thing that's interesting and different to the way that we grew up is now the widespread availability and usage of social media. It's not just TV stars anymore, right? But budding stars on every platform imaginable. Sometimes it feels like everyone wants to be a creator or an influencer, but maybe without knowing fully what might follow if they go viral or become famous. So what is your take on social media and young people's mental health? It's so unhealthy for young people to be on social media. Like when I have kids, I'm not going to let them on social media until they're 16 maybe, because your brain is still forming. When you're on social media, you're seeing things, you're putting yourself on that platform that was once only reserved for television stars and singers. Now you are putting yourself out there in front of the world for people to judge you and to criticize you, but also you're building that unhealthy habit of looking for validation through likes and follows. If you are a young person, you know, of the appropriate age to start following your dreams and be a content creator and make music or whatever it is that you're doing on TikTok or Instagram, you have to just be really careful. And that's kind of what child star is for parents looking to get their kids in the industry. I wanted to make a film that wasn't a manual, but it was a cautionary tale. When you put yourself on a platform or in front of so many people, it creates a lot of pressure. And that can be a lot to handle for someone that's under the age of 18. You say in the documentary that music saved you. What does it feel like to write, to sing, to be in front of an audience then and now? Before it was something that I needed. I needed that escape and I needed that validation. I needed that success. Now I do it because I love it. You know, I do it now because my life is fulfilled in so many other ways. And this is just the cherry on top. If I want to make music, I will. If I don't, then I won't. Doing it from this place and this mindset of not needing it anymore, is so much more rewarding than anything I could have ever achieved in my musical career. It sounds very liberating. It is. It's very liberating. Yeah. This is the 2020 Grammys. That was a really emotional moment for me. I remember being in the hospital after my overdose in the ICU from the ICU bed. I actually listened to that song and was like, I'm going to sing this one day. This will be my song for when I come back. And it just resonated so much with me at that time when I felt so low in the hospital. I recorded it in the midst of my addiction. I sang it from a place of such deep desperation of just wanting to be heard and seen and loved. Getting on stage again for the first time since my overdose, I was overcome with emotion and I felt really raw and vulnerable up there. I also opened my eyes and looked and saw my mom and my sisters out in the audience and kind of a full circle moment to have been recording that song from such a dark place to overcoming what I had overcome and singing on the stage at the Grammys. And doing exactly what you wanted to do, accomplishing it, feeling triumphant. It was a triumphant moment for me. Yeah, that's really beautiful. Thank you for sharing. So now I know that you're posting your Cooking with Demi videos and you said you're in your Martha Stewart era. Can you tell us what you enjoy about that and how it's reflective of your current relationship with food? The biggest reason why I stepped foot in the kitchen is my recovery with food. The first time that I ever stepped foot in a grocery store in treatment for my eating disorder, they took us on an outing and we went to a grocery store to buy our ingredients for a so overstimulated and overwhelmed by the sight of so much food that I just broke down and cried. To go from that place to now going to the grocery store, getting ingredients myself and cooking them for myself and my loved ones, it's the ultimate f*** you to my eating disorder. Yeah. And I'm not going to let it win, you know, no matter what. What gives you hope or what brings you joy right now? Being in the kitchen with my loved ones, which includes my fiance, sometimes my friends, and my new baby pickle with my other two dogs, Batman and Cinderella.