A 75 Year Old Self-Made Millionaire Shares Her Best Lif

What is a failure that you've experienced that defined your life at the time? I met my boyfriend at a diner and he gave me a thousand dollars to start my business so he became my business partner and then he married my secretary seven years later and I was out, she was in, she's younger and prettier than me. Always my whole life my forte was I just go for it but now I slow down and go wait can I really handle that? You've been married for quite a bit. This doesn't mean it's real love. Really? A few weeks ago I interviewed 75 year old Barbara Corcoran who for a ton of reasons has figured life out but surprisingly is also still trying to navigate it. Aging sucks. Don't let anybody tell you differently. You probably know Barbara from Shark Tank. She's made billions of dollars in her life. She has judged thousands of entrepreneurs and business people today with questions unlike any interview that she has done. I am sharing the extended conversation of Barbara's greatest life lessons and experiences that I guarantee will change the way you think about life. How old are you? That's how I start all my videos. 75. What does it feel like to be 75? Aging sucks. Don't let anybody tell you differently. However you put a pair of skis on my feet and I'll beat any guy down the road. So that compensates. Right. Yeah. Would you say you feel your age, feel younger, older? It depends what day you're asking. Some days I feel 100. Most days I feel 50, thereabouts. What have you done in your life to get to be 75 and feel the way you feel? I've made some important choices actually. I've had three facelifts. A lot of people won't do it. I've had three times. It makes me feel younger because I look younger. And what else have I done? I think I surround myself with young people. I have a younger staff. I have a younger family. I have everything younger but my husband. And I want a younger man, by the way. I'm looking at you. What about your husband? Oh, he'll be okay. He's a good, he's a good egg. Yeah. A lot of people, when they speak to you, they always talk to you about your successes and everything that you've achieved. But I want to flip that on you to start and ask you what is a failure that you've experienced that defined your life at the time? One. I can only pick one because it's been a series of many, many, many. I met my boyfriend at a diner and he gave me $1,000 to start my business. So he became my business partner. And then he married my secretary seven years later. And I was out, she was in. She was younger and prettier than me. And it was a really hard hit. I recovered, but it wasn't so easy. What was the lesson that you learned from that if you're looking back on the situation? That you'll always see it upside looking back and you can't see it at the moment. I mean, if he hadn't met her, I wouldn't have started the Corcoran Group. I wouldn't have had the success I have. So thank God that all happened. I wish somebody was there to tell me at the time. I learned that bad stuff happens that break your heart, but you can get up and get going again. And that's exactly what I did. And there's always a plus to any bad side of a coin. You flip it over and you see something bright. I think everything that's happened to me in my business career certainly was a result of belly flops that I turned over and saw the bright side. Yeah. Let's think about the person who's, let's say around my age, I'm 25. You look older. Do I? Yeah, you do look 31. Yeah. Most people say that. Is it the beard or no? No. Take your beard off. You look about 35. Just joking. I'm not saying good luck. You asked me how old I was and that's not a nice thing to do at my age. So I'm asking you back. That's true. That's fair. A lot of people who are around my age, older, younger, are very lost in life, looking for answers. They feel anxious. If someone is starting their working life, how do you recommend that they navigate it? And what's the relationship that we should have with money? I think you've got to question yourself on something like that. A lot of it's forced on you because of peer pressure, what you see around you. I think you've got to really sit down quietly and ask yourself what's important to you. And money is not important to most people. They think it is. But if you really ask yourself, what are the values? Or what do you really want to be doing for a living? Or what do you really like to do? Or who do you want to be when you grow up? You get away from such a narrow definition of, I want to make more money. Easy for me to say, because I have it. But believe me, when I didn't have it, because I had 23 jobs before I found real estate. So I was poor for a long time. And let me tell you something, I was as happy then as I was once I had my own business. And I keep reminding myself of that. The money doesn't really make a big difference. Yeah, because I know already a comment that I've received before interviewing people of similar success to you that they say, well, easy to say she has money. So easy for her to talk about it that way. Yeah, it is, though. It's like cheating on the answer. Yeah. Yeah. A lot of the people I've spoken to will say, at the point they're at in life, like they've made their money, they've gotten their success. They never talk about how important money was, or is at this stage in life. This stage? Well, because they've had everything they want. But do they talk about how rough money is at times? Because it is a complicator. It complicates life. Not that I would ever give it back. I think it's still very nice to have it because you get to do whatever you want. You get freedom as a result of being rich. Yeah. But it complicates relationships and makes life a little more rough to come out as a good person. I think I hope I'm not stereotyping. But generally, a lot of people I know that have come into a lot of money made a lot of money really made a mess of their life. So I think in a way, life is more simple and more attainable to be happy, if you don't overlay it with a lot of money. One of my favorite lessons in life, it's a stoic quote, and it reads easy life, hard choices, hard life, easy choices. It's true. What is an easy choice that you made at some point in your life that proved to make your life very hard? One of the choices I made was, when I was young in my business, I thought I had to be fancy. So I started getting fancy, which was a real mistake. I had my hair done every week, that I had to be who was out there in my marketplace. But the minute I became genuine and became myself again, because I got tired to get my hair done. People like me. Because I think, I think I learned once and for all that I had to be genuine because people will accept you with all your faults if you're the real deal. Do you notice that a lot in life or lack of authenticity? Well, I live in New York City. What do you think? Of course I do. You know, there's so much flesh in New York and so much wealth. It's hard to keep focused on what's really important at times, I think. For you, what is that? What is important? The only things that are important, my kids, my husband, on a good day. And, and really valuing the time with people you love and giving it the time that needs to be really a wonderful part of life. A lot of people make easy choices in life. Like when I used to work at a bank, I quit my job, but everyone else that I knew who hated their job, they said yes, and they stuck with it. Those hard choices I made ended up making my life, what I would say, is easier now. I'm doing what I love and I'm very happy about it. Why do people make easy choices? Because it's easier. You know, basically it's no choice. Easy choices are usually no choice. The worst choice of all. But when you make a choice to change your life, there's a lot of effort involved. You've got to change a lot of stuff. You've got to get people on your side. You've got to do some explaining to people you're close to or you're supporting. I think a tough choice is hard. It's hard to make a turn. So it's much easier to just ride. Just ride. Most people do. It's almost the end of the year, and if you're someone in a situation like this and you want to be able to do things like this, this, and this, I highly recommend you grab a copy of our Goal Setting Journal. In just three parts, this journal will help you figure out your ideal life, turn that life into a set of specific and measurable and achievable goals, and then create the discipline structure through goal tracking to track your progress over six months until your biggest dreams become your reality. We're in the middle of our only and therefore our best sale of the year with discounts and bonuses worth up to $1,500 for the first hundred people who click the link below and grab one. So don't let another year slip by. Click the link below to learn more about the journal and start upgrading your life just like Barbara and many other people have managed to do. What were some sacrifices you made going through your whole journey? Oh, there were a lot. When I was a young 20-something year old, I worked 18-hour days my whole 20s. So I didn't go out with my friends. I always stayed focused on work. You give up a lot. But boy, by the time I was 30, they were giving up a lot all the time, and I was sailing. And I saw that dream. I knew it would happen that way. So you didn't mind giving up those choices. Yeah. Or I didn't mind. So in hindsight, you don't regret that? I don't have any regrets. I'm good at moving on. That's my forte. I'm good at moving on. I don't look back. I mean, it's such a waste of time. You can't change anything. So I just look forward. Why do you not have regrets? What's your process of not? I mean, I wouldn't have regrets for two reasons, actually. One, thinking it through and spending any time on it is a waste of time. You can't change anything. And secondly, when you dwell on a regret, you're apt to become a victim. And that's very dangerous. People who are victims are never happy because they feel like, oh, something got in the way. They meant to change. They couldn't have a fair shot, whatever their reasons are, and they blame other people. And those people, those victims, which is a lot of people out there from what I could see, are never really happy because they've never taken really accountability for themselves and taking the responsibility of being responsible for your own life. You can change what you want or not change it, but don't blame the next guy. Yeah, I think it lends itself to victimhood, and I think I'm afraid of that. I don't want to be that person. Why do we do that, though? I mean, because it's easier. Yeah. It's easier to be a victim because you don't have to be responsible. Like I could have been a millionaire if only my father was rich. Well, as Mark Cuban's dad wasn't rich. You could find many exceptions to every one of those truisms or excuses that people have. It's just not true. Over 15 seasons of Shark Tank, I've watched obviously a lot of episodes, but you have seen so many different people come to you, like a business proposal, but also it's a people proposal. If you're analyzing all of those different proposals you've seen, what characteristics make somebody or something attractive to you? A good entrepreneur, you mean? Yeah. A good entrepreneur is like a jack-in-the-box. That's what I'm always looking for. I'm looking for someone I think could be smashed on the head over and over and they'd still pop back up. Because every investment that I've made, if they didn't have the ability to get back up, boy, they never made it. So I really think resilience is the number one trait in probably 90% of it. They don't even have to be smart. Some of my biggest successes, I'm not very smart, but you know, if they were smart, they'd lay low and wait till the trouble's over, but they're right back up, give me more, give me more, you know? So really I have my biggest successes with people who are more of the second type. If I'm trying to analyze somebody in life and I'm trying to figure out, is this person worth my time? Is this person worth investing in? Regardless of whether that's an entrepreneur or not. Yeah, you mean whether you want to spend time with them or not? Yeah, we could boil it down to that even. You know what I do? You have to analyze the person as much as the business too, right? In that moment. Yes, but it's just important in life. How I analyze people in life is I surround myself with happy people and very often I'm fooled on the front end. Someone looks happy or they'd be an addition to my life, but then I find out they're an energy sucker or what have you. I think you could ask yourself, how do I feel when they leave the room? When they leave the room, I get a happy puff of air and I think that's a nice person that I want to be back with. And when they leave the room, I just feel like, oh, not anxious to see them again. I don't know why, but get rid of them. They're never going to add to your life. But on Shark Tank, there's a lot of hints that people give you. When they're standing in front of you, they make eye contact or they don't. They look at you genuinely or they don't. They're full of crap or they're not. They use big words or they don't. And very importantly, you ask them about their background and generally in their background, they're either going to a victimhood or steering away from it. So you want to get the guy or the gal who really is optimistic and willing to push forward and just isn't going to be held back by anything. If I was trying to figure my life out or piece it together, think about someone who is dissatisfied with where they are at in life and they want to take the next step. What are three questions I could ask myself that would lead me towards those answers? I think the first thing is you have to ask what kind of tape you have in your head. Everybody's got a tape and it's usually an old tape that you got as a kid you got to get rid of. I had a tape in my head that said, you shouldn't be here, you won't do it, whatever, a lot of negative stuff. And I change it to, Barbara, you're effing amazing. Every time I purposely kick it in, Barbara, you're effing amazing. That puts my head in the right place. But if somebody's really lost, I think the best solution for that is find people who are less advantageous than you are or find someone who's less advantageous than you have and dedicate yourself to giving. I don't think you could be wrapped up in yourself and feeling sorry for yourself and not getting ahead in life if you're giving. I think if you give, like they say, it's a cliche of course, but you get, but it's really true. I have seen so many people turn themselves around by getting not focused on them but getting focused on the next guy. People are self-involved and it can be a very negative spiral. 1988, you've been married since then, correct? How do you know? I don't know when I've married. I have to ask my husband. He knows the date, the time, he's one of those. He's a good man. But he doesn't remember my anniversary, which really bugs me. Really? Really. Honestly. Do you? When is it? When is it? I don't know. Oh. Oh no, February 14th. A lot of people cannot find real love in today's day and age. You've been married for quite a bit. This doesn't mean it's real love. Billy, don't be so quick to judge. Okay. Yeah. Tell me. I'm not saying it's not because I love my husband Bill very much, but marriage for me is more challenging than building a business any day of the week. I think it takes great tolerance. It gets boring. Marriage gets boring. I've heard that before. Even I'm boring to myself. I've said it before. Yeah. No, marriage is not the most exciting thing. Marriage is really like a relationship of support when you need it. That's how I see it. And he's a good guy. We'll always be there. And I'm a good gal and I'll always be there for him. But no, you don't have this true love thing exactly right. Can you define the word love in your opinion? Staying loyal. Staying loyal to your children, your husband, your family, your friends. When you're thinking poorly of them, just stick it out, shut your mouth, and stay loyal and listen to them. No, I think that's important. You're painting it with one angle, but I'm assuming there's also good parts to it. Did I sound that negative that I didn't even have a good side? I just want to give you. You're not signing up for a marriage after listening to me, right? I'm still going to go for it. You really are? Think about it. It's for life, you know? But what is the upside? You can take it for granted that you have someone in your corner. You can take it for granted that you have someone who would make a good father and always be there for your kids. And those are the substantial blocks in life that you really want to take for granted without thinking about every day, how's it going? Yeah. I have a question here in my journal. And the question is, in your life, when did you feel the most proud about yourself? And what were you doing at that time? For me, I was most proud of myself when, maybe this sounds trite and goes back to your money question earlier. But when I bought my mother and father a new car, I was 32. They had never had a new car because we had 10 kids that had the same old jalopy their whole life. And they couldn't believe they got a new car. I felt rich, successful, satisfied, loving. All the good words came to my head, and that was me. I walked around, I'd say, for months, proud as could be. Because it's something like that. So again, giving, you know? Yeah, what did you prove to yourself at that moment? At that moment, I proved to myself that I had my priorities straight, that I did something for my parents that they couldn't do for themselves. Trite, I guess, because it was cars, you know, something that makes such a big difference in life. But it was an extension of love. It was a thank you. It was a love letter. What is one thing that when you were younger, you put a lot of importance on, and as you got older, you realized wasn't that important? When I was a little kid, I couldn't read or write. And so everybody thought I was stupid, which I wasn't. I knew inside my head I wasn't stupid, but if you label that way, you start to believe it. In hindsight, it was the best thing that ever happened to me, because I think I have spent my entire life proving I'm not stupid. I think I worked this hard, I prepared this hard, I pushed this hard, because I'm so afraid that somebody's going to think I'm really stupid. I don't think I'm really convinced, you know? But no, that was a tough one. But that was only when I was a kid, and it gave me so many talents to get through life. I got rejection early. I kind of got ready for early. All I had was an early education. Yeah. But tough on a kid. Really tough on a kid. Happy I came through. People looking through life like me, I'm 25, and I can only imagine what life... Are you sure you're 25? I'm 35. I'm 31. 31, I say. If I shave, I'm 35. Does life get better as you get older? You asked me at a time when I'm questioning that myself. Does life get better? Life gets better in terms of knowing what you want, being more satisfied, going where you want, choosing to be people or letting them go if you don't want to be with them. I think you have more power of what you want out of your normal day. But what is hard about life, or I'm finding hard, is getting older in the physical way. I mean, I can't stand the fact that I can't run down the street anymore, or I can't lift a heavy weight or something. It's not worth it to take up a new sport and hurt my knees. So I'm afraid. Actually, you know what, that's what it is to have fear for the first time in my life, come in and to have to weigh the pros and cons. I was always my whole life, my forte was I just go for it. But now I slow down and go wait, can I really handle that? And I hate that hesitation. It's a rough one for me. Because I'm a goer. Yeah, maybe not tough for everybody. But not a fun one. Yeah, not at all. If you could go back in time to your 25 year old self. Oh boy, that would be great. I look good then. You look great now. I didn't even wear makeup. You look great. If you could go back to your 25 year old self knowing what you know today, and give her one piece of advice, what would you say to her? Chill. Don't be in such a rush. I mean, I was always in a rush. I never hesitated for a second. Just chill out and smell the roses a little more. I don't think I was smelling the roses till I was 35, 40. Probably when I had my first kid at 48. It was the first time I really slowed down and realized what I had that appreciation, the thankfulness. I'm very thankful now. But as a young woman, I wasn't thankful. I just thought I'm gonna slay the dragon and see how far I could go. Thank you so much. You're welcome. I appreciate it.